Disclaimer: Well ya' know somethin', brother—me, or ANY of my Hulkamaniacs don't own anything, DUDE!

Yeah…so here we are again, last we left off, Stone Cold was in a barfight along with the Acolytes and Bo and Luke Duke from the Dukes of Hazzard. Sheamus and Natalya saw what had become of Billy Gunn and Ivory, so tonight, let's start off with Kofi and CM Punk, as they make their way through the main stretch of town…

Kofi pounds the steering wheel in frustration, saying, "Oh come ON, mon! Why do they allow these old people to even drive past a certain age?"

Kofi's stuck behind a Lincoln Town car with the right turn signal on, doing 30 in a 45 mph zone.

CM Punk is laughing, shaking his head. He says, "Kofi, you know, someday YOU'RE going to be that age, and sure enough—someone's gonna' be behind YOU saying those exact words, I bet'cha!"

Kofi waves him off, "No WAY mon! Yeah, I'm going to be old someday, but I'd at LEAST have the common courtesy of pulling over and letting faster people pass through!"

CM shrugs and changes the subject. He turns to Kofi and laughs, saying, "Man, that was REALLY mean what you did to Michael Cole back there, hahaha!"

Kofi smiles, "Hey, what can me'say? Da' boy was out in de' middle of de' road!"

CM, laughing a little harder, says, "Haha! Are you KIDDIN' me? He was on the sidewalk and you STILL swerved toward him like you were going to hit him—don't deny that shit!"

Kofi laughs a little and says, "Eh now, mon…I wasn't gonna' hit him."

CM answers, "Well, If I were Cole, I woulda' had to get a new pair of pants after that one, dude."

Kofi turns his attention to the still slow-traveling vehicle ahead of him. He lays on his horn and says to Punk, "Mon…I wish Goldberg would've had a rocket launcher built into this 'ting! That way I could just blast these old folk and get going!"

CM rolls his eyes, "Kofi, come on—"

Kofi cuts him off, "No Fuck 'dat sheet! They're gonna' get dead soon anyway, mon. One foot in de' grave and de' udder on a banana peel, mon! I'd be doing 'dem a FAVOR!"

CM feigns like he's agreeing with him, "Kind of like a mercy killing, huh?"

Kofi nods and says, "EXACTLY! 'Dat's what me'sayin', mon!"

"Kofi?"

'Yes, mon?"

"Get your head outta' your ass."

"Eh…whatever, mon."

We'll leave them go for the moment and join up with Alberto and Santino, who are also making their way through town…

Santino says, "Heyyyy, when's the next rest areas?"

Alberto shrugs, "I no see any sign, senor. If ju' want, I could pull over."

Santino looks around and says, "Eh-yessss, that would be perfect!"

Alberto pulls the car over and he looks around to make sure the coast is clear. He says to Santino, "Be careful, we're still in the city. Cops may show up at any time!"

Santino nods and looks around as he jogs through the park and behind some tall bushes. He pulls his straps down from off of his shoulders, and he folds them down to just below his pelvis. He starts relieving himself and smiling, the gentle patter of pee hitting the soft dirt reminded him of a gentle stream in the middle of the woods, where deer drink.

"Aaaaaaaahhhhhh…that eh-felt GREAT! Ah-Santino Marella drain his lizard!"

Just as he was finishing up, a little girl suddenly comes around the shrubbery and sees Santino finishing up. She stands there screaming. Santino looks up, and with his dick still dangling out of his tights, meets eyes with this now-traumatized little girl and they both start screaming. Santino hurriedly puts his shoulder straps back up and tries to say, "WAIT LITTLE GIRL! IT'S NOT WHAT YOU—"

That's when she runs away, screaming for her mother.

Santino thinks and acts quickly. He runs toward Alberto's car, leaps in, and yells, "DRIVE, DRIVE, DRIVE—HURRY UP!"

Alberto, panicked a little, starts the car and screeches on down the road out of sight.

Now, let's see…hmm…I know, we'll look in on Natalya and Sheamus, as they're now headed out of Oklahoma City…

Sheamus asks, "Hey Nat, why is it that whenever I'm around that one chick—I forgot her name—but there's this one diva that always has a…smell to her."

Natalya nods and smirks a little, "Yeah, I know who you're talking about—it's Kaitlyn, isn't it?"

Sheamus says, "That's it-it's KAITLYN! So, what's with the smell?"

Natalya sighs and says, "Well, she has, like, REALLY atrocious foot odor."

Sheamus' jaw drops. Natalya nods and says, "Thaaaat's right! As pretty as she is, she has a wicked, wicked case of foot odor. What it comes from is that she has this terrible habit of wearing ALL of her shoes and boots without ANY kind of socks or hose on."

Sheamus nods and answers, "Aaahhhh…so THAT'S it, then? You know, I was trying to put my finger on the odor, as it smelled like rancid butter mixed in with sweat and shame."

Natalya laughs, "Hahaha…yeah, me and the other girls think so, too! Anyway, EVEn when she wears shoes, you can TILL smell her feet. Ok, like, I remember at a show we did over in Hershey, PA, right? She came to the arena wearing tights with UGG-boots on. Well, you see, we worry when she WEARS shoes with a lot of padding and or, fur, or whatever because we know that it's just going to make her feet sweat all the more. And, of course, that night—sure enough—she had perfume on and when you got close to her, she smelled like a combination of Lancome and…foot odor—EW! Like, GROSS!"

Sheamus nods and asks, "Well, is THAT right, lass?"

"Yep…sad, but true! Oh! That's right—the other one you need to watch for is Maryse!"

"Whaaat? MARYSE?"

"Yeppers…Maaaaaryse. Ok, Maryse's issue is she has really bad gas—I'm talking 'chili night'-type gas, dude. For…REAL, okay? One night, when we were staying at the Hilton over in Vegas, she LITERALLY crop-dusted the ENTIRE length of the hallway on our floor. For the next 40-45 minutes that followed, no one could figure where that awful retched smell came from."

Sheamus shakes his head, as Nat continues, "Ok well, someone alerted the front desk-dude, the POLICE were even called because someone thought a methane bomb went off, or something. The hotel management then spent the following two HOURS on our floor, spraying Lysol, while the police evacuated the entire floor until all of the spraying was done and it smelled like a building again, rather than lemon-scented ass!"

Sheamus just says, "Lass, you and these Divas—I SWEAR…"

So we'll leave them be as they head back toward the small, sleepy town of Ardmore. I'll end this chapter here tonight, hope you enjoyed it!

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Don't forget to join me next time—same Warrior time, same Warrior place, same Warrior channel!