Thanks ceywoozle again! ;D I don't know what happened there, I just sort of wrote randomly! ;)

Written for Torchwood Fest, Day Two: "Going Undercover"

Day Two - Going undercover

The team was in the conference room, waiting for Jack to explain the plan. They had to go undercover, one member short, and it was important for them to listen and stick to the plan – which they sometimes didn't do – even if the plan was only to follow and spy someone. Their mission was to go to a club that the man – possibly alien – who they were going to be following owned. He was doing some interviews and one of them had to be hired to keep a close eye on him and try to put a bug in his office or, if lucky enough, on the man itself.

When Jack – with Gwen's help – finished explaining, he turned to Tosh. She was the one who was not coming with them as she had a huge scarf around her neck and walked around with at least three packs of tissues on her. She had been sick for two days now and even thought she was still coming to work, she was really slow at her job and her brain didn't register anything she did. Jack had told her to go home, but it was Tosh, so she kept coming.

"So, who are we?" Jack asked, as she was still managing this part of the mission, with Ianto's help.

"Ben Dover," Ianto answered in her stead, as she was blowing her nose.

"What? A time and a place, Ianto. I thought you didn't-"

"That's your name," Ianto interrupted. "Dover, Ben."

"... Seriously?" Jack was surprised, and Owen laughed.

"Owen, you're Dick Loser."

"Wait, what?" He said, not laughing any more. "Oh you didn't!"

"Yes, we did."

"Tosh what the hell, you always come up with something good!"

"She's sick, let her rest. We thought it would be fun."

"I kinda like it," Jack shrugged. "What's yours?" He winked at Ianto. Ianto rolled his eyes.

"Thomas Fisher."

"That's... normal. No joke?"

"Nope."

"Okay, okay, why does Tea-boy get the normal name and I have the dick joke?"

"'Cause you're a dick, Owen, just face the reality," Ianto sighed dramatically. Tosh laughed in her tissue, Jack grinned, and Gwen had trouble keeping a straight face.

"What's Gwen's?" Owen asked, wanting to change the subject. Anything but making fun of him.

"Destinee Hooker," Tosh said.

This time Jack laughed and Owen had a small satisfied smile; he wasn't the only one with a ridiculous name.

"Okay, I'm doing this only to see peoples faces when they hear Jack's name."

"And next time, we do not pair Tosh and Ianto together, please," Gwen added, and Owen nodded frantically. The two of them then got up, and left the room.

"Ben Dover, eh?" Jack said as Ianto was cleaning the table and taking the mugs on a plate.

Ianto winked at him and smiled, and it was enough for Jack.

"It was Tosh's idea," Ianto eventually said, and Tosh, still sitting, waved with a smile. Or at least she must have smiled, but the scarf hid it.

Jack shook his head and grinned as Tosh left. "I might just do that tonight, though," he whispered in his ear as Ianto was collecting the last mug.

"Do what?" Ianto asked innocently, bending over the table to wipe at a spot he had already cleaned. Jack growled but took advantage of the view. He heard Ianto chuckle and was surprised when Ianto turned and kissed him. He responded but Ianto pulled away, and Jack watched him go with a pout.

It was night when they all arrived, separately but at the indicated time for the interviews. The club was open and crowded, and when they and several other people arrived at the front doors, they were all asked to wait inside the club. The bouncer also informed them that they would be called when they'd be needed and that they could enjoy their time while waiting. Jack sneaked in behind Ianto who was dancing while trying to spot details in the club. They tried to make it look like they didn't know each other, and Ianto managed to whisper in Jack's ear what he had noticed, among other things. There were way too many bodyguards, and two strange looking men, even if he hadn't managed to spot what was strange about them – maybe Jack's hands on his hips weren't helping.

Then Jack was summoned to his interview with a tap on the shoulder and Ianto went to order something to drink. Looking at the bartender up close, Ianto realised after a while that the man didn't have any pupils and it was disturbing. So, definitely aliens, because he highly doubted that two people in the same room could have the same eye problem, if it even was a possible eye problem.

After a while, Ianto saw Gwen being called in and he frowned because Jack hadn't come back yet. Owen had long since come out and had told them he would wait outside.

Eventually, someone came to escort Ianto to the door, and just then, Jack's voice crackled in his ear.

"It's a trap, Gwen, Ianto, don't get yourself hired," he said, breathlessly. "I..."

He didn't finish his sentence and Ianto had to concentrate not to react. Jack was in danger. He had to do something.

"I'm out, I'm okay." Gwen's voice said in response. "They thought I wasn't made for the job, can you believe this?!"

"Oh yeah, boo, poor you," Owen answered.

"They're hiring whores, that's all!"

Tosh's voice came suddenly in. "Jack, are you okay? Ianto, you there?" The reasonable and intelligent one trying to stay on the mission.

But Ianto couldn't answer. He shook hands with the manager, noticed that neither he nor the bodyguards had pupils, and swallowed. He could manage this.

"So, Mr. Fisher..."

Ianto could hear Tosh's voice in the comm asking him if he was okay, but Ianto ignored her, concentrating on the job interview instead. And the fact that Jack was somewhere nearby. Maybe not alive any more. No, he was probably still alive, it was dumb to hire people just to kill them right away... Not that stupid, actually. But then, why would they have refused Owen or Gwen if their only goal was to kill?

Ianto ignored Jack's warning. He did everything he could to make sure they would hire him, and it worked. Well, they told him to follow them through another door, saying they'll think about him, which probably meant yes, or at least maybe. It still was better than no, goodbye.

As he calmly followed two of the bodyguards along a corridor, hands in his pocket – he was actually holding a knife, just in case – he tried to guess where he was heading. Wherever it was, it wasn't of Earth. The walls were of an unfamiliar metal and Ianto realised that they hadn't considered that the club itself might be an alien ship. At the end of the corridor there was a door and, still following the bodyguards, Ianto entered a very alien-looking room, which didn't seem to surprise the two men walking with him at all. Not that they should be surprised by something they were familiar with, but it was clear from their unconcern that they hadn't realised it didn't look Earthly at all.

"You said you could speak three languages?" one of the men suddenly asked.

"Currently, yes. I know a few words in other languages as well," Ianto answered absently, watching everywhere. Trying to find Jack.

His comm crackled in his ear. "He's in. Be careful, Ianto, we lost every contact to Jack."

Ianto didn't answer to Tosh but didn't cut the communication either in case he needed information or things went berserk. As a door opened in front of him and that one of the men – aliens, really – pushed him inside, he knew he was in trouble. And still no sign of Jack.

Ianto tightened his grip on his knife and turned, but he was alone. The door was closed. Locked. His comms were probably off as well, but he wasn't going to check because it wouldn't look natural in case he was being filmed. He turned again and this time he faced an alien and they didn't have a human appearance at all. They had a pretty cool suit, though. Not that it was important, Ianto reminded himself, and all of a sudden burst into action. It seemed to surprise the alien as they didn't react at all and were on the ground, a knife under their throat before they could yell from shock or for help. The skin was slippery under Ianto's legs, which he used to keep the alien's three arms under him, but rough under Ianto's hand, on what he had assumed to be the throat. It was always pretty confusing. And maybe not the best move if he was being watched but he had a hostage now.

"What do you want from us?" Ianto demanded.

"You're hurting me," the alien said in perfect English, and Ianto frowned. They didn't even try to defend themselves. "We didn't know this was a way of greeting."

"It's not..." Ianto answered automatically.

"My name's Ianto."

"What?" Ianto – the human one – asked, not understanding.

"We found it a few minutes ago in someone's mind."

"I don't understand..."

"I like it! Uncle gave it to me and said it belonged to a beautiful man, like me!" They – he – said proudly and Ianto let go and sat on his heels, confused. The alien looked so young he didn't want to hurt him.

"What's happening here?"

"You're not surprised by my appearance? Uncle said people could scream and not believe us, but he didn't say they would jump on us."

"Yeah, I'm... used to it, in a way. What did you mean by someone's mind?"

Ianto – the alien – straightened up and smiled while he crossed his legs. He really looked so young and innocent. And totally harmless. Ianto felt that maybe this was a big misunderstanding and that these aliens hadn't done anything bad.

"Ianto, don't do anything stupid!" Both Iantos turned. To Jack, who had just entered, panting because he had clearly run. He frowned when he saw Ianto and an alien sitting on the floor, talking. "What?"

"So," Ianto said. "You're obsessed with me?"

"Huh?"

Ianto smiled and stood up, smoothing down his suit. "You allowed them to see some things in your mind, so now this boy is named Ianto after myself."

Jack grinned when he understood what was happening. Jack had first thought the aliens wanted to kill, or experienced on him and had warned the team, but then when he had realised everything was fine he had been unable to contact them again. The aliens had explained to him that they had just come from the Rift and were trying to blend in, but needed information. They took people, asked them if they would agree to share their memories and thoughts, and learned like this. That was why they knew how to speak English and had wanted Ianto with them. They were scientists trying to learn and compare languages from different regions, planets, and when possible, times. They had accepted Ianto and Jack because they could both speak languages the aliens didn't already have.

Jack had agreed to let them into his mind, but had special training from the Time Agency, and the mere fact he was from the 51st century he had allowed him to only let them see memories related to languages, but had joked around by showing them some hot moments with Ianto. He hadn't thought they would give an Earth name to one of their own based on what they had seen of Ianto. He was pretty proud of that one, in the end.

After sharing what they knew, Jack and Ianto thought about letting the team know they were both fine. They went back out to the the club, shaking hands with the owner who thanked Ianto when he told them about the lack of pupils in their human form.

"Tosh?" Jack said into his comm when he and Ianto had finally left the club. "Still there?"

"She's half dying, how are you?" Gwen answered for her.

"Is she okay? We're fine, you can all go home if you want, we'll walk back to the Hub. Someone please force Tosh to get some rest."

"Dick, take her home if she's still at the Hub," Ianto added. Jack laughed beside him and they clearly heard Owen grunt.

"You'll pay for this."

Nobody answered and Jack wished them a good night before cutting the channel. Ianto did the same and looked at Jack who was grinning like a mad man.

"You didn't mind me sharing some of our moments?" Jack asked

"I wouldn't have minded you asking first, but not really, Ben."

"Hey, I don't like Ben that much. The whole name, okay, but Ben is too short. Ben. Ben. Nope, don't like it."

"Your name is Jack. It's just as short as Ben," Ianto rolled his eyes.

"Nevermind, I like it when you say it."

"Ben Dover?" Ianto asked innocently, smiling slightly when Jack bit his lip.

"Sir, yes Sir!"

Ianto chuckled and walked a little faster towards his flat.