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Chapter Five: Lost and Found

Despite her assurances to Petunia, Lily knew she was endangering her sister's family. Anywhere she went and whoever she was with would be in danger. All she needed was to get through dinner, put Harry to bed and she could say she was retiring early. Vernon and Petunia would probably prefer it that way.

Petunia had been right when she said that Vernon would not be pleased with her presence in his home. She did her best blend into the décor of the home. She tried once to pick up Dudley, having never properly seen her nephew, only to have him snatched away from her from an incensed Vernon muttering about how he didn't want his son contaminated by her kind. Perhaps this wasn't going to be the best plan.

She watched her sister very carefully through dinner. They only had one high chair for their son so Lily was forced to keep Harry on her lap and feed him peas and potatoes that she had mashed herself on her plate. Thankfully, he seemed to pick up on the tense feeling around the table and ate every spoonful she gave him, despite his normal distaste for peas. It was either that or he was just trying to out eat his cousin, who opened his mouth for anything that was on a utensil. By the end of the meal, Harry had eaten more than she had. She had no appetite, everything she put in her mouth tasted like ash.

Petunia reached in front of her and picked up Lily's half finished plate of food. Lily looked up at her sister's face to find her staring down at Harry, not Lily. Harry gave his aunt a bashful, sly smile and the corner of Petunia's mouth quirked up before she quickly hid it again. Perhaps her original plan would work after all.

"Do you want some help, Tuney?"

"No, that's alright."

"Now, Petunia," Vernon spoke up, "if she wants to stay with us for awhile, let her do some work around here."

Petunia looked like she was caught between a rock and a hard place and Lily took pity on her. Standing up, she handed Harry over to her sister. "Here, Tuney, why don't you get to know your nephew a little while I clean up." Petunia still looked distressed so when Lily traded the dirty dishes for Harry, she whispered, "No magic. Promise." Apparently that was all Petunia wanted from her.

Washing dishes by hand was actually very calming for her. She took her time, relishing in the steady rhythm of washing, rinsing and drying. Every now and then, she glanced up to watch her sister and son sitting at the table. Petunia had picked up a discarded rattle of Dudley's and was waving in front of Harry who was laughing and reaching for it. Apparently, Vernon said something to her because when Lily looked up again, Petunia was staring off into space while Harry was trying to figure out what was so interesting that had suddenly stopped playtime. When the dishes were all dried and stacked up so Petunia could put them back properly, she went to retrieve her son.

"I think I'll turn in, then," she told her sister. Petunia nodded curtly but said nothing more to her. She gave a nod to Vernon who dutifully ignored her. As she walked up the stairs to the guest room they allowed her to use she realized that she couldn't leave Harry here with her sister. Petunia may treat him like her own but Vernon most certainly would not. The last thing she wanted to was to disrupt what Petunia thought was a well balanced marriage.

She quietly gathered up Harry's things, and grabbed a shirt and sweater from her sister's closet. The days were getting colder and she had left Hogwarts with just a light weight shirt and jeans. As she made her way back down the stairs, she heard the murmur of adult voices and the screaming of Dudley.

"But Diddy, it's bedtime," Petunia was trying to say but was drowned out by the wailing. Using the noise level as cover, Lily slipped out of the house and back into the night. She had to find a suitable home for Harry. She thought by hiding him in the muggle community, she could continue with the fight against Voldemort and return for him when it was once again safe. But where to place him was proving to be more problematic.

Severus sneezed for the seventh time and earned himself more annoyed looks from the muggles in the library. He had stopped trying to apologize after the third one but the dust from the old newspapers was playing havoc with his sinuses. Dumbledore had told him it was a possibility that Lily would seek out her sister at this time. The slight issue however, was Petunia had been married and they didn't know her married name. So here he sat, flipping through various newspapers searching for a wedding announcement. Five hours later, he stumbled upon it.

"Petunia Annabel Evans marries Vernon Charles Dursley-" Severus snapped the binder shut without reading anymore. Thankful for having completing his task, he headed out into the brisk night and took a breath of the clean air. There was a phone booth right out outside the library steps, complete with a number listing. There were times when he despised the fact that he had a muggle father and other times, like this one, that he was grateful for that kind of exposure. When he opened the book to the D's, thankfully there was only one V. Dursley listed. The address was 4 Privet Drive, Little Whinging which placed it in Surrey. When he left the phone booth, he glanced around the area before ducking into a back alley to apparate. He knew Surrey well enough to get in the vicinity without splinching himself.

When he reappeared, he was certain he had splinched himself. He was standing in the middle of a playground. The swings were swaying slightly in the November breeze and the merry-go-round creaked as it revolved. Once his eyes became adjusted to lack of light, he realized that this was not the playground near Spinner's End. Once his heart returned to it's normal pace, he crossed the park and squeezed his way between a row of houses. He found the street sign, Magnolia Road.

He started down the sidewalk, pulling his overcoat closer to his body. He had to shed his robes for clothes that would allow him to blend in with the muggles. Sirius and Remus had been sent to place the Longbottom family into protective custody before starting to comb through the wizarding community looking for Lily. Since Severus had experience, somewhat, with muggles, he was sent into the non-magical world to look for her.

He passed by Magnolia Crescent and opted for turning down a road called Wisteria Walk. And that was when he saw her walking right at him. Not wanting to frighten her off, he tried to stay hidden in the shadows but when she came within ten feet of him, she stopped dead and drew her wand.

"Who's there?"

"It's just me," he stepped into the dim lamplight, hands held up to show he was unarmed.

Her wand lowered but she didn't advance towards him and he was too afraid of her disappearing again so he just waited. He knew he couldn't wait for too long as Voldemort was most likely looking for her and Harry as well. And him, he thought after a mental grimace. Standing out in the middle of a muggle street was not the best option but his fear of having her slip away again rooted him to the spot.

She took a couple of small steps toward him. "Why are you here?"

"I was looking for you." He could tell Harry was sound asleep, resting his head on her shoulder, thumb in his mouth.

"Why?" she repeated.

He would have thought that was obvious by now. Why would he risk his life to save her and Harry in the first place? Why would he side with the good guys after being permanently branded with the Dark Mark? Why was he willing to put up with his childhood bullies just so he could have five minutes alone with her for the sole purpose of looking at her with no interruptions? Because he loved her the best he knew how but speaking the words caused more fear to run through him than any time he had gone before Voldemort. Like always, he came up with an alternate excuse.

"Dumbledore was very worried about you and Harry's disappearance. Black and Lupin are out looking for you too."

Her face suddenly hardened and she brushed past him, quickly making her way down the street. "You should've just let me go."

Severus had to jog to catch up with her. "Dumbledore is offering you safety, he's wanting you to stay in the castle. Hogwarts is the best protected building in all the wizarding world."

"And what will I do at Hogwarts, Sev? Sit in the common room and wait until the war is over? Until Harry is old enough to go fight in it instead of me?"

"I…I don't know what Dumbledore has planned exactly but I'm sure-"

"It'll work?" she finished bitterly. "He was the one who told James and me to go into hiding. He was the one who told us to use a secret keeper. A lot of good that did us."

He wanted to tell her it wasn't Dumbledore's fault that their secret keeper was a turncoat but he figured now was not the time to argue the fact. He opened his mouth to plead his case further but a searing pain shot through his left arm. He had managed to stifle a shocked shout into a slow hiss of pain as he pressed his left forearm against his chest.

Lily finally slowed in her fast pace walk and looked over at him. "What is it?"

"I…I don't know." He could see revulsion with a twinge of compassion on her face and he felt even guiltier over his past actions than before.

"Doesn't the Dark Mark hurt when he summons you?"

Even though she had tried to keep the repulsion out of her voice, he could still hear it clearly. "Yes, but this is different. It's more intense than when he just summons us." And it was still burning. Something was wrong. Thankfully, Lily must have noticed as he saw her draw her wand and he watched as silver stag bound down the street and disappear. Thankfully the pain in his arm overshadowed the pain in his heart at seeing the silver stag.

"We, uh, we should head back to the castle," he said, still rubbing his arm. "I don't like this."

Lily looked unsure. "I just sent word to Dumbledore about your Mark. Why don't you go back?"

"And what exactly are you going to do?" The words had come out harsher than he intended.

She looked around the street, whether she was trying to come up with a plan or was trying to her alter an already laid out plan, he didn't know. Thankfully, she wearily relented. "Fine. We'll go back."

Relief wasn't a strong enough word for what he felt. "We can apparate from the park."

"Alright."

He led the way towards the playground area which wasn't that far. He wondered if he should offer to carry Harry for her, but she had such a protective hold on her son that he figured it would be best to leave things as they were. The playground came into sight and they quickly made their way across the grass. He wished they had some time to reminisce, remind her of happier times and how he had remained her friend despite some foolish decisions. The mark on his arm burned again, angrier this time. It was as if the mark itself knew of his switched allegiance and was now turning on him.

"Sev? Are you alright?"

He tried to nod his head and smile but the pain was starting to bring tears to his eyes. "It hurts…more than I've ever felt before. It's not just a summons."

Before she could question what else it could be, a series of pops and cracks echoed across the neatly trimmed grass of the play area. Before Severus could even draw his wand, they were surrounded by a group of ten robed figures. Lily had stepped closer to him, he could feel her brushing against his arm and shoulder. One of the figures stepped forward and in the dim lamplight, he could see the skull mask of a Death Eater.

"The Dark Lord is very wise," the cold, sneering voice of Lucius Malfoy issued from behind the mask. "These marks are not just for summoning, Severus, but for finding as well."

I am evil...I know. It's a sad thing. ;-)