Author's Note: Okay, first of all, I had to use another original character but I had good reason this time! From the research I did from the books and the Harry Potter Lexicon, the only Death Eaters that we know of were from the times of Tom Riddle's attendance as well as the years Snape was there. I'm sure that Slytherin would not have a drought of Death Eaters during the timeline of this story since Voldemort is still very much alive and well. My humblest apologies...
Chapter Twelve: Treasures in the Snow
It was the first week in December when the first snowfall blanketed the grounds of Hogwarts. No one thought that he enjoyed the varied seasons, but Severus did and spent as much time as he could outdoors despite his sallow coloring. If he had to pick a favorite time of year, it would have to be the winter. He wasn't too keen on the frigid temperatures, especially now that he was staying in the Slytherin dungeons once more. But there was the snow. He liked the idea of something white and pure that was able to cover the scars of the earth. Everyone said that spring was the time of renewal and rebirth but he always saw winter as the second chance for nature. Hopefully, this winter would prove to be his restoration.
Most of the students were in their last class of the day but all of them had finished potions for the week. He had heard some of the students talking about the start of the snowfall as they came in for the last potions class. Professor Slughorn must have noticed his impatience when the class was dismissed and excused him from cleaning up after the third years. He had stopped by his quarters, a makeshift prefect's room, to grab his wool cloak and scarf before heading outside.
True to the student's word, the snow was falling in fine, steady flakes. There was already two inches on the ground by the time he had made it outside. There were a handful of students, already done with their day of classes, having snowball fights or just enjoying the first significant snowfall of the season. He stayed as far as possible from the group, most of them were seventh year Slytherins. Unfortunately, he wasn't so lucky.
"Mr. Snape?"
He knew exactly who it was before he even turned around. Holly Avery was a cousin of one of his housemates and fellow Death Eaters. He had voiced concern to Dumbledore over her more than friendly manner towards him. She was most likely passing information back to her uncle but Dumbledore assured him he was safe on Hogwarts' grounds. Bracing himself for another conversation with the wily girl, he shoved his hands into his pockets and turned to face her.
"Miss Avery," he nodded and kept walking, hoping against all hope that she would take the hint that he didn't want to be bothered. She remained oblivious as she jogged through powdery snow to reach him.
"You always walk so fast," she said, her breath coming out in puffs of clouds. "Are you finished for the day then?"
"Unfortunately," he mumbled.
"What was that?"
"Yes, yes I am."
"Wonderful," she grinned. "So am I."
He had kept up his brisk walk, not at all what he had envisioned when he first heard of the weather conditions. Holly was a bright student, very gifted but very much anxious to graduate and join her uncle and parents in their support of Voldemort.
"I was hoping," she said since he wasn't instigating any type of conversation, "perhaps you could tutor me in potions?"
"Your marks are more than acceptable in potions."
She gave an exasperated sigh and rolled her round brown eyes. "My uncle spoke so highly of you and your intelligence. I didn't expect you to be this dense." She slide her arm through his.
"I don't think this is appropriate," he said, disentangling her arm from his. "I am still considered your teacher."
"Well, not for long. By June, I'll be of age. Severus?"
He thought of correcting her again but was weary of it. "What?"
Her face turned very serious. "May I see it? Your Dark Mark?"
"Absolutely not. It is not something I'm proud of anymore."
"Why not?"
Her fervor stopped him in his tracks. It surprised him but then again, it really shouldn't have. He was exactly the same way when he was her age. Being a Death Eater was placed on the same level as being a rock star or a powerful politician. Granted, he wanted to become one to gain power to protect someone he loved but Holly, she probably had no idea what she was going to get herself into. When he answered her, he stared her straight in the eyes.
"Being marked by another man is not a respectable thing. And that's what the Dark Lord does, he marks you as his own. You will never meet a more demanding, cruel master than him. My mark is a constant reminder that I am no longer my own person. Every time I see it all I feel is shame and regret. These are things you need to think about before you so willingly give yourself over to the Dark Lord."
She looked crestfallen at his words. "My uncle would brag about knowing you, being friends with you. He said you were sure to be the Dark Lord's most trusted servant, his right hand. When I told him you were here, he wanted me to tell you should you decide to return, you may."
He frowned deeply. Return only to a certain death. Considering how his last welcome was received, he doubted another would be so kind.
"Forgive me, Severus, for being so bold but," she stared the ground.
Color tinged her pale cheeks, from cold, embarrassment or both, he didn't know. "But what?"
"I would gain so much favor if you returned to the circle with me."
It was his turn to roll his eyes. "Did your Uncle happen to tell you what he did to me the last time I saw him?"
She shook her head.
"He used the cruciatus curse on me, multiple times as well as other hexes and curses. I believe he even got a few well aimed kicks to my rib cage but I couldn't be sure due to the blood I had lost from my other wounds." He looked down at her and saw fear, true fear in her eyes. "That is the type of person you must be gain access to the inner circle. So Holly, are you prepared to hurt, maim, kill, back stab and torture in order to have acceptance? I thought I was but I couldn't give up my soul for that."
"What would you give up your soul for then? What else is there besides power and prestige? Admiration and acceptance?"
All he could think of was Lily. He couldn't give up his soul to Voldemort because he had given it to Lily. Everything he was, everything he could be was connected to her, whether she knew it or not. "I would give up everything, even my life and my after life for something that the Dark Lord has no understanding of."
She was holding breath, literally, waiting to hear what it was.
"Love," he said simply. When he finally spoke the word, she had the look of someone who had been slapped in the face: shocked and angry. Since she was finally speechless, he turned on his heel and continued his walk in the gently falling snow.
"Thanks again, Hagrid," Lily called over her shoulder.
"Anytime for yea!" He shouted back, waving to her and Harry from the door of his hut. Harry waved back to the half-giant with a wide smile and a giggle. He was always so happy whenever she picked him up from Hagrid's and it did her heart good to see him smiling so much. She always got a laugh out of seeing Hagrid handle the one year old, as if he were going break at any moment. Dumbledore was more than right in his assessment of Hagrid's care for her son.
Harry gurgled and cooed before shoving the Frisbee sized cookie Hagrid had given him into his mouth, or at least part of the sweet. With his free hand, he pointed up to sky and Lily thought he was looking at the snow that was falling down until she followed the direction of his finger. Someone was walking around the lake by themselves. She couldn't quite make out who it was as they were too far away and the snow was obscuring their features.
"You want to go see who that is?" she asked Harry. He removed the cookie from his mouth and gave a delighted squeal. She took that as an affirmative. He really was going to grow up to be like his father for he always loved being around people. Due to that love, he had single handedly embarrassed her beyond anything that she had ever been through before one of the first nights they spent at Hogwarts.
Dumbledore had told her that it would be perfectly acceptable for her to eat meals at the staff table. So after her second day of teaching first and second years, she went to dinner, sitting at the Head Table with Harry on her lap. Professor Slughorn took the seat next to her and asked if he could hold Harry. Lily acquiescence despite how well she had adapted to eating one handed.
No sooner than she had chewed two bites did she look up to see that Harry had made his way almost to the end of the table leaving a wake of disaster. Slughorn had a beet sticking to his shiny forehead, McGonagall was trying to get mashed potatoes off of her hat while Dumbledore was blotting pumpkin juice from his robes. She jumped up from her seat and hurried down to Madame Hooch, who had been handed the trouble maker but had enthralled him with a snitch. Thankfully, it seemed the only thing that distracted him from wreaking havoc.
"And now we eat in our room, don't we buddy?" she said quietly and he giggled at her before chewing on the cookie again. She had gotten close enough to the person now to recognize the stooped posture and shoulder length black hair of the person walking around the lake.
She hadn't seen too much of Severus since they came to Hogwarts. True, she was relishing the alone time that she and Harry had when they first arrived and now with both of them involved in their classes, she hadn't had a chance to see how he was doing. She still was having trouble getting the picture of him beaten and bloody out of her head.
"Sev!"
He stopped dead in his tracks as if someone had put a wall up in front of him. He looked up with a wary expression until he caught sight of her. It never ceased to amaze Lily how his face changed whenever he relaxed. The hard lines that had already etched themselves into his young face faded and his dark eyes lost that cold glint.
"Lily," he greeted, giving her a timid smile. Harry greeted him in his own, unique language. "And Harry, too."
"What are you doing out here by yourself?"
"Enjoying the peace and quiet."
"Oh," Lily said, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt." She started to move away when he practically jumped in front of her.
"No, no. I didn't mean it like that. If you want to join me, you, uh, but if you're busy, you know-"
"Sev," Lily smiled at him. It always made her smile whenever he would get tongued tied because it happened so rarely. "You're going to give yourself a brain aneurism if you keep that up. You want to hold him?" She held Harry, who was already reaching in Severus' direction, out for him to take. Severus looked like she was handing him devil's snare instead of a baby.
"I don't know…I don't think-"
She plopped Harry into Severus' flailing arms.
"Okay," he answered quietly, trying to find a comfortable position to hold the child. Harry looked up into Severus' face with wide eyed wonderment. The picture looked so terribly distorted to Lily. She was so used to seeing Harry in James' arms, although she was just getting used to seeing Sirius carting him around now. Remus would snatch him up whenever he had a chance but he refused to even come within a five feet radius two days before the full moon despite Lily's assurances. But for some reason, seeing Severus holding her son seemed to hurt so much more than any of the others. But the moment quickly ended as Harry whacked the side of Severus' head with Hagrid's cookie. Lily tried to admonish her son but she started laughing instead.
"I'm sorry about that," she said, wiping the tears from her eyes. The look of shock on her friend's face was priceless. "Do you want me to take him back?"
"No," Severus shook his head. "I, uh, I think this the start of a beautiful friendship." To emphasize the point, Harry smacked him again and squealed with laughter. Lily tried to stifle her own laugh and snatched the cookie from Harry. She broke off a small piece and handed it back to Harry. The child looked at the small piece very seriously before holding up to Severus' face.
"Yeah," he commented, "you can't do much damage with that."
They starting walking back up to the castle as dusk was settling and the snow was coming down heavier. Harry seemed content enough with Severus holding him and Lily enjoyed the feeling of having both her arms free.
"So, how are your potions classes going?"
"Well, enough. Professor Slughorn was even talking about letting me teach a few classes, one for each year. He'll have to go over the lesson plans, of course, but still. It'll be better than just cleaning out cauldrons and setting out ingredients."
"Do you still have your mother's potions book?"
He was surprised she remembered that. True, their friendship had deteriorated by sixth year but they still had the same potions class. In an effort to support inter-house unity, Professor Slughorn had partnered them together at times. "Yes, as a matter of fact I do."
"I think you should write your own potions book. You came up with a lot of short cuts that were extremely helpful and made the process much simpler."
"If I ever get sent to Azkaban, I'll be sure to write it then."
"Don't joke about that, Sev." That had been her greatest fear when he was still siding with the Death Eaters, that he would be caught and thrown into Azkaban. Given his past, the dementors would have a field day with his memories and the tragedies that befell him. She couldn't stand the thought of losing him now. Their friendship had a second chance and she didn't want to waste it. Life was too short, as she had cruelly found out.
He cleared his throat. "How are your classes going? First and second years treating you alright?"
"Yes." She smiled. "The kids are wonderful and the charms are so basic. The only thing I don't like is grading the homework for them."
"Ah, yes, homework. The bane of everyone's existence, teacher and student alike."
Lily looked over to her left and saw a large, bare branched tree sitting close to the water's edge and she slowed to a stop. This was the spot. This was where everything fell apart. Severus stopped as well and looked around. Realization came over his features and he started to look terribly uncomfortable. She couldn't let the break in their friendship remain there anymore. He had saved her life, twice now. He had proved himself to be a friend, a very faithful and selfless friend, just like he always had been.
"I'm sorry, Sev."
His brow furrowed. "You're sorry? I thought I should be the one saying that."
"You already did," she sighed. "I never accepted it and I'm sorry for that. I never should done that to you."
"I never should have said that to you. You had every right to turn me away."
She shook her head. "No, I didn't. You were my friend. I should have been there for you more. Maybe if I had-"
"No, that was my decision. A very foolish one but still mine."
She reached out and touched his hand only to find it was ice cold. Looking down, she noticed his hands were raw looking. "Sev, your hands. Where are your gloves?"
"Oh, I, uh, I," he shrugged, "I left them back at the castle."
She nodded her head and pulled out her wand, hitting him with a warming spell. "Am I forgiven?"
He smiled slightly, but the look of relief was unmistakable. "There was never any need."