It had been years since Ben accompanied his sons on the annual Christmas Eve outing to cut the tree. For Jamie's sake, he wanted to be involved this year, and he also thought that the experience might possibly benefit April as well. It was frosty afternoon with only a skiff of snow on the ground when Ben helped April up into the buggy and tucked a heavy blanket around her legs. Hoss, Joe, and Jamie climbed atop the buckboard, steamy clouds floated above the heads of the horses. Joe began singing as they pulled away from the barn. Soon everyone but April joined in. Ben reached over and patted April's blanket-covered leg. His deep voice rang out with exuberance into the crisp, winter air.
When they reached a grove of firs, Jamie was given the task of choosing the tree and then helping Joe to cut it off. Ben got down from the buggy just briefly to break off a soft evergreen branch and pick up a pinecone. He slid back into the seat beside April. Ben gently ran the soft needles along her cheek and held the fragrant branch up to her nose.
"Doesn't it smell marvelous?" Ben brought the branch up to his face and took in the strong pine scent for himself.
April's eyes seemed focused on the trees out beyond them. Ben then pulled back the blanket and took her gloved hands from her muff. He smiled warmly at her as he placed the pinecone in her hands and clasped his hands around them so she could feel the prickly texture of the cone through her gloves. April sat silent and unfazed through it all. Ben tried to remain upbeat as he repositioned the blanket over April once more, but her inability to engage the world about her grieved him. It did, though, do his heart good to see Jamie thoroughly enjoying himself. The lad selected a good-sized fir that would fill the space beside the staircase. Once the tree was cut, Jamie helped Hoss carry the it to the buckboard and toss it on the back where it landed with a swish and a thud. Soon everyone was headed back to the ranch house.
At home, Hoss and Joe put the big tree into a stand. Hop Sing had retrieved the decorations from the storeroom and had steaming cups of hot chocolate ready for all after their chilly excursion to get the tree. Red bows, candles, and ginger cookies soon covered the tree. The fragrance of evergreen filled the downstairs. As the youngest in the house, Jamie was given the privilege of placing the angel on top, climbing onto Hoss' shoulders to do so. GIfts appeared from all over the house and were placed under the tree. After a delicious supper that was filled with lots of reminiscing of past Christmases, all but Ben and April turned in for the evening.
Ben encouraged April to have a seat on the settee so they could enjoy the fire and the tree. Thinking that a brandy might be nice, he moved across the room to the small table by stairs to pour a small glass for himself. While his back was turned, April, of her own accord, rose and moved toward to the Christmas tree. She stood staring blankly into the center of the pine. Mechanically, she raised a hand to touch the red bow on the branch in front of her. Her eyes slowly moved up the large pine and became fixed on the angel that sat on top.
"Good news of great joy." April's mouth formed the words, but no sound came forth. Suddenly she turned and faced Ben.
"April?" He stared at her in disbelief.
April's voice was faint and scratchy, but her eyes were dancing with life. "The angel said, 'I bring you good news of great joy.'"
"That's right! Oh April." Ben nearly dropped his glass, but managed to carefully set it down on the side table.
"Ben."
With an expression of wonder and delight, he quickly covered the distance between them and held out his hands to her. April reached out and took hold. Ben pulled her close and held her tightly against his body. "You're back. You've come back to me."
"Yes, I'm here." No longer was there a disconnect between April's mind and body. She found the warmth and comfort of his embrace luxurious. "I was here all the time, but I just couldn't tell you. It was all so frustrating to be able see and hear, but not able to respond." April snuggled even further into Ben's chest, her hands slipping around his waist. "I'm sorry to have been such a burden to you and the boys, especially Jamie. He's suffered so much."
Ben's hand came up and caressed her hair. "Shhh. No. No. I'm just so happy to have you here, and the boys will be thrilled to know you are well again." Gently pushing her away so he could look into her lucid eyes, he ran his hands along the sides of her face and then pulled her close again. "I'm so happy. Happy and grateful to know you are fully yourself again."
They lingered in their embrace until April spoke into his chest. "You can't begin to imagine how hard it was having you so close, holding me, touching my face, but never kissing me."
Ben chuckled and tightened his arms around her. "Oh, I think that I might understand better than you think."
"Ben, would you please kiss me now?"
His eyes went soft. Releasing his hold, Ben ever so gently took April's face in his hands. He caressed her cheeks with his thumbs before tenderly pressing his lips to hers. "I wanted so much to kiss you the day that you ran out of the house, but of course I could not. You knew that I was already in love with you. But as you said that day, compassion and understanding was what you needed the most, not a declaration of my love." His eyes were glistening as he spoke. "Thankfully this is a much different day." Ben leaned down to kiss her again and then his hand came up to press her head into his chest. "A much different and glorious day."
April and Ben kept the news of her recovery a secret from all but Mrs. Haywood, who was sworn to secrecy until it would become obvious to everyone the following morning. Christmas day could not come quickly enough for Ben. Not many hours later, Joe was surprised to see his father relaxed and sitting in his favorite chair with a cup of coffee. A fire was already blazing in the hearth. It was not the fact that Ben was dressed in his best suit that caught Joe by surprise, but that his father had been the first to come downstairs on Christmas morning. Since the time he was a small child, Joe would be found by the rest of the family early Christmas morning shaking gifts under tree and vibrating with excitement. However, this Christmas, it was Ben that could not wait for everyone in the house to arrive downstairs.
"Merry Christmas, Pa! You're up awfully early, aren't you?" Joe smoothed the last wrinkles from his shirt and straightened his string tie.
"Merry Christmas, son! Yes I woke up early and couldn't go back to sleep." Ben was working hard to suppress a big grin.
"I heard the others moving around. They'll probably be down soon." Joe paused and clapped his hands together. "Can't wait for Jamie to see all his gifts. This is going to be a great Christmas!" Then Joe sighed and his voice grew serious. "I mean, it's just too bad April hasn't come around. Wouldn't it be great if she came out of it today, Pa? Wouldn't it?" Joe's face lit up. He was trying so hard to bolster his father's spirits.
Ben set his cup and saucer on the coffee table. Keeping his emotions in check, he looked intently at his youngest. "Yes, Joe, that would be just the miracle I've been praying for."
Moments later, Jamie came bounding down the stairs followed closely by the lumbering steps of Hoss. Everyone exchanged happy Christmas greetings. Ben rose to take the Bible from the shelf and set it on the coffee table in preparation for the reading of the Christmas story. Hoss and Joe took that as their cue to begin lighting the candles on the large fir that towered almost as high as the upstairs landing. Hoss lit a stick and handed it to Jamie so he could join in the Christmas tradition.
"I'm going to go check on April and Mrs. Haywood." Ben ducked his head hoping to appear a little sad, but actually to avoid looking at the others for fear he might give away the surprise.
When he got upstairs, Ben knocked on April's door. Mrs. Haywood opened the door and greeted Ben with a knowing smile. "She's all ready. Doesn't she look stunning."
Though maybe a trifle thinner than she had been the evening of her party, April looked every bit as lovely in the same gown she had worn for that occasion. Her face was beaming as Ben walked near and kissed her cheek. He leaned in and whispered into her ear. "You look absolutely beautiful. I can't wait to see their faces."
Mrs. Haywood graciously remained in the room and gave the family a few minutes to celebrate without intrusive observation. April and Ben stood at the top of the stairs long enough to get the boys attention. Hoss and Joe did a double-take before their faces broke into huge grins. Jamie stood with his mouth open, unable to believe what he was seeing.
Ben released April's arm when they reached the main floor. She went directly to the shocked Jamie and placed her hand on his shoulder. "Merry Christmas, Jamie, and thank you for taking such good care of my chickens."
Tears welled up in the lad's eyes and he almost threw himself into April's arms. Ben reached out to squeeze Jamie's neck in understanding before stepping away to give Hoss and Joe simultaneous claps on their arms. Christmas greetings, hugs and kisses abounded for the next few minutes. Joe jogged up the stairs and invited Mrs. Haywood to come down and join them. Eventually everyone was seated quietly for the reading of the Christmas story. All eyes were focused on Ben as the words of the age-old story flowed effortlessly in his deep, resonant voice. There was a twinge in Ben's chest as he closed the Bible and began to sing "Silent Night". It had always been Adam's place to lead the family in song and was difficult for them to sing without him. Pausing for a few moments of reflection at the close of the hymn, Ben then offered a brief prayer of thanks and blessing for the day.
Ben gave April a warm smile as he rose from his chair and extended his hand for her to join him. They moved in front of the festive Christmas tree. "There is one more thing that I must do before we enjoy the wonderful feast that Hop Sing has prepared for us."
Joe elbowed his big brother and winked at Jamie in anticipation for what he was certain was coming. Upon hearing his name mentioned, Hop Sing padded from the kitchen to observe what was going on.
Ben dropped to one knee and took April's right hand in his own. "April, will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?"
With glistening eyes, April reached forward to stroke her love's silver sideburn. "Yes, Ben, I will."
The room erupted with cheers that Ben and April momentarily ignored, unashamedly occupied in their embrace and kisses. A glorious day of celebration commenced.
Epilogue:
Ben and April were married shortly after the new year. In their marriage, they approached each and every day with a renewed sense of gratitude, having come so close to losing their loves but miraculously been given a second chance on life. WIthin the next year, they would formally adopt Jamie into the Cartwright family. April became to him the mother he had longed for. The following Christmas was again an exceedingly joyful one as a dark-haired gentleman, who was just beginning to show some gray at the temples, led the family in carol after carol. Ben Cartwright was a contented man with a heart overflowing with love.
"And now these three remain: faith, hope, and love.
But the greatest of these is love."
1 Corinthians 13:13