"Give me life. Give me pain. Give me myself again."
For what seemed like the umpteenth time that day Akashi opened his bleary eyes to gaze around yet another room. This room, however, seemed slightly familiar to him as he sat up with a small groan. The lights were turned off and the only light was from the moon filtering through the curtains and small candles lit around the room. He saw two figures lying near the couch and immediately recognized one of them.
"Atsushi?" he whispered, crawling over the giant. The giant in question merely groaned before going back into la-la land once again.
Akashi pouted (no, he told himself, emperor's do not pout so change it to a scowl) and poked the giant in the cheek to wake him up.
"Atsushi!" he whisper yelled, shaking the giant's shoulder. When he didn't so much as move Akashi started to panic, violently shaking the other's shoulder.
"Atsushi? Atsushi?!"
He started to hyperventilate, breathing heavily and shaking as he tried to wake up his childhood friend. Tears brimmed his eyes, threatening to fall down his cheeks as he resorted to tugging at the other's shirt.
"P-please wake up Atsushi..!"
A groan, "Aka-chin...?"
A choked sob left the redhead's lips as he heard his friend speak, tears finally spilling down his cheeks in small torrents, "A-Atsushi..."
"Aka-chin?" the other was fully awake now, worry in his voice as he heard the soft sob from his friend and enveloped the other in a hug. Akashi sobbed lightly into his chest, still shaking horribly after another one of his panic attacks.
"I'm sorry Aka-chin, I didn't mean to scare you," the other cooed in his ear, rocking him back and forth while petting his soft hair. "It's alright Aka-chin, I'm fine. Nothing happened to me nor Mido-chin."
Akashi sniffed, "Shintarō's here?" though it was slightly muffled, Murasakibara understood what he said.
He nodded, "Yup. We wanted us to stay by you so you'd feel protected."
A watery smile made its way onto Akashi's face, "T-that's nice.."
Murasakibara hummed in agreement, still holding the redhead in a comforting embrace as Akashi slowly calmed down.
"Ne, how's Aka-chin doing?" the giant asked, staring into the other's red and gold eyes.
Akashi looked confused before realizing he meant the other Akashi, "He's fine, I suppose..." he started, twirling a piece of his hair. "He's just...weak, after what otou-san did to him."
He could feel Murasakibara freeze against him and looked up, "What's wrong?"
"Why do you call him your father?" Murasakibara inquired lowly.
Akashi frowned, "Isn't that what he is? My father?" but some part of him knew that he was lying to himself, and apparently Murasakibara could sense it too.
"Stop lying to yourself Akashi," he must have been really serious, because he dropped the -chin, "We both know he isn't even close to being called your father."
"I know, but..." but what? What was he trying to say? Murasakibara was right; Masaomi was nowhere near being a father figure to him, so why...
Why did it hurt so much to let him go?
Tears brimmed his eyes for the second time as the words tumbled out of his mouth like a flowing stream.
"But some part of me still wishes he were my father; a father who loved me and cared about me. I know it may seem far-fetched, but some part of me still believes it. I don't know why but I just do." he sobbed, words becoming muffled by the other's already soaked shirt.
"Aka-chin..."
"That's enough, Murasakibara," a new voice said, silencing the giant before he could utter another word, "You've made Akashi stressed enough, nanodayo."
"Mido-chin.."
Midorima readjusted his glasses, handing Akashi a tissue to dab his eyes clean. The redhead nodded his thanks and wiped his red-brimmed eyes.
"How long have you been awake?" he asked, throwing the tissue into a nearby garbage bin.
"Since Murasakibara asked you about the other Akashi," he replied.
"Oh, I see..."
"Come, you must be hungry," the megane stated, helping Akashi and Murasakibara up (even though Oha-Asa specifically said to stay away from Libras today for they would be the cause of bad luck) and guided them towards his kitchen.
"Tofu soup?" Midorima asked, though he needn't really already knowing it was the redhead's favorite food. He earned a nod as Akashi sat down in Murasakibara's lap, something the two always did whenever they could since they were children.
"Ne, Boku-chin," Atsushi asked, using the nickname he had given the other Akashi even though said redhead had rejected the name, "How have you been?"
Blinking stupidly the other took a second to register what the purple-headed giant had said before answering, "Fine, I suppose..." he murmured.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes, I'm fine, Atsushi."
"Okay..." he decided to drop the topic for now and possibly bring it up later.
A comfortable silence enveloped them as Akashi leaned back into Atsushi, relishing his warmth as long limbs wrapped around him securely. He nearly dozed off had it not been for the bowl of tofu soup being placed in front of him. He was about to grab the spoon with a large hand took it instead, scooping up a small portion of the meal.
"Say 'aah' Boku-chin~" Atsushi drawled, bringing the food closer to the redhead's mouth.
Akashi would have rejected the offer any other day, but his stomach was desperately telling him to eat something so he complied. Carefully biting into the tofu, he chewed slowly and swallowed, feeling the warmth spread throughout his body and send delightful shivers down his spine. More was offered to him and he gratefully took it, until eventually the whole bowl was gone and left Akashi stuffed.
"Has your 'father' being depriving you of food?" Midorima asked, voice eerily calm as he pushed up his glasses whilst putting the bowl in the sink to be washed later.
Looking up he slowly nodded, feeling strong arms tighten around him and pull him closer towards a broad chest.
"I'm gonna crush him..."
"Don't, Murasakibara."
Akashi looked up with hazy eyes and leaned his head against Atsushi's shoulder, already feeling sleepy even though he just woke up. The other two seemed to notice this as well as Midorima brewed some tea.
"Murasakibara, why don't you give Akashi a bath?"
The giant nodded and carefully picked the redhead up, taking him down the hallway and into Midorima's bathroom. He had already memorized the way due to the number of times they had been here.
Setting Akashi down on the toilet, he turned on the water and let it fill up about halfway before turning the faucet off. Testing the water he deemed it the right temperature for Akashi and turned towards the small redhead.
"Alright, Boku-chin, the bath is ready."
He nodded and carefully took of his shirt, being helped by Atsushi as he worked on his lower half next. Being respectful the giant looked away, only turning back when the redhead had tapped him on the shoulder. Gently scooping the smaller up, he gently placed him in the lukewarm water while trying not to look at his many wounds littering his pale body. He cupped some water in his large hands and let it wash over Akashi's back. He gently scrubbed the small back, being careful to not reopen any wounds and taking note of every small hiss by the redhead, occasionally letting out small 'sorry Boku-chin's whenever he would scrub too hard over wounds and hear a loud hiss.
After a few minutes Akashi relaxed, letting the soap suds wash off him and sinking into the water. Atsushi rinsed off his hands and picked up two bottles of shampoo and conditioner.
"Pomegranate or cherry blossom?"
"..cherry blossom, please." the redhead responded, eyes droopy as large hands massaged his scalp with the sweet-smelling shampoo before putting in the conditioner. Once that was rinsed out Atsushi grabbed some body wash, deciding it would help to keep Akashi's skin blemish and infected free before squirting the cherry blossom suds into his hands.
He started off by gently rubbing the small shoulders before moving down, being wary of his wounds. When he got closer to the lacerations on the other's back, he felt him tense immediately and mumbled a small sorry in reply. Akashi slowly relaxed in his hold, sinking a bit lower into the bubbly water. He let Atsushi work on his chest next, one hand scrubbing it while the other scratched behind his ear. Akashi leaned his head into the warm palm, sitting up straighter so Atsushi would have more room to work.
The purple-headed giant stopped just below his naval, letting Akashi work from there and rinsed his hands off. When Akashi lifted his leg Atsushi was thankful to see no scars or bruises there, just pale skin like what should have been the rest of Akashi's body.
After Akashi was sufficiently washed off Atsushi drained the tub, wrapping Akashi in a warm, fluffy towel and used a separate one to dry his hair. Wet red hair was ruffled as Atsushi thoroughly dried the damp hair, being gentle of the wound his father caused. Once the other was dry he took off his shirt and offered it to Akashi.
The other was taken aback, "Why are you giving me your shirt?"
"Ne, because Boku-chin didn't bring any spare clothes with him." the giant said simply.
"Oh..." maybe the brain damage was more severe than he thought.
"Here," Atsushi lowered the towel to the other's waist, tugging the shirt over his head, "I'll help you."
The black fabric was soft against Akashi's skin and he took a moment to marvel that. Granted it was too large for him – it reached just above his knees and the supposed-to-be short-sleeve shirt was now a long-sleeve shirt – but it was still nice and warm and cozy.
The towel fell from around his waist and Akashi suddenly felt cold, realizing most of the lower half of his body was bare, "A-Atsushi...is there anything I can use to cover my lower half?"
"No, I'm sorry Boku-chin. Mine and Mido-chin's pants are too big for you so they'd just fall off," Atsushi frowned, truly sorry since he knew how self-conscious Akashi was about his body.
Letting out a soft sigh Akashi nodded in consent, letting Atsushi pick him up since he felt he could barely sustain himself on his own. He rested his weary head on a broad chest, the slightly cool air of the living room causing goosbumps to form.
"Are you cold Boku-chin?"
"Mhm.." was the tired response, but after years of knowing the redhead Atsushi caught the message and set Akashi on the couch next to Midorima, who had turned on an NBA game.
"Feeling better?" Midorima asked, for once not acting like a tsundere, taking a sip of his tea.
A nod was his only response and he let the faintest of smiles form, brushing loose bangs out of Akashi's face as he was covered up with a warm blanket. Dichromatic eyes started to close as Atsushi sat in between Midorima and Akashi. Gently ruffling his hair, he leaned down and kissed the redhead's forehead.
"G'night, Aka-chin."