ELEVEN

Harry separated himself from the Weasley twins before too long, and set off down the train to find his Slytherin friends. Before he got too far however, he found a compartment of Gryffindors. Neville waved him in. Harry's face broke into a grin as he spied Ron and Hermione arguing in the compartment.

Hermione's arms were clamped tightly around an enormous ginger cat that Harry was very familiar with.

'You bought that monster?' hissed Ron, his mouth hanging open.

'He's gorgeous, isn't he?' said Hermione, glowing.

That was a matter of opinion, thought Harry, though he couldn't deny the cat's usefulness. Crookshanks' ginger fur was thick and fluffy, but he was still the same bowlegged cat with a face that looked grumpy and oddly squashed, just like Harry remembered. Crookshanks looked across the compartment at Harry as soon as he entered, but the pair of fighting Gryffindors hadn't noticed him yet.

'Hermione, that thing nearly scalped me!' whispered Ron angrily. Harry was surprised they weren't yelling.

'He didn't mean to, did you, Crookshanks?' said Hermione.

Harry vaguely wondered what Crookshanks had against Ron, now that he didn't have Pettigrew. Before that thought could process properly, Harry was distracted. In a move that Crookshanks had always made an art form of, the cat easily slipped from Hermione's firm grasp and shot across the compartment at Harry. For a second Harry thought he was going to be attacked, but instead Crookshanks wound his way around and around Harry's legs and started purring loudly.

Harry looked up in shock, finding Hermione and Ron both staring at him with dropped jaws. Harry couldn't help it, he laughed.

Neville was the first to recover.

'Hey Harry. Did you have a good summer? Thanks for the birthday gifts.' He said quietly.

Harry turned to face Neville with a smile, about to say it wasn't a bother, but the smile dropped from his face as he took in who was sleeping next to Neville on the bench.

'He's asleep. We assume he's a professor, though what he's doing on the train-' Neville explained quickly, having followed Harry's gaze.

'Lupin.' Harry hissed it out before he could help himself, and it had come out much nastier than Harry had meant it to.

He couldn't help it though.

It looked like Harry now had a serious issue for the year that he hadn't previously considered. He knew, of course, that Remus would be teaching. He had prepared to see him alive again, and had been looking forward to it even (though wary about whether or not Remus knew about the Potter's). But seeing Remus completely shocked Harry for an entirely unexpected reason.

Teddy.

Harry's heart hurt.

He hadn't realised how much his Godson had looked like his father. Teddy was a metamorphmagus, and Harry really hadn't seen much of Remus in him at all. But it was all there and obvious now. They had the same shaped eyebrows, and the same ears, the same thick hair (even though Teddy's changed colour and length constantly), and the same posture. Harry clenched his teeth together and desperately tried to get a hold of his emotions.

Teddy was probably one of the biggest reasons Harry had been so happy to come to the past. Or rather, his absence had been. Despite Dumbledore's double-cross, and his parents abandonment, despite all of Snape's sneers, Lucius' manipulation, Skeeter's lies and despite everything Voldemort had done- None of them came even the tiniest bit close to how much he hated Andromeda Tonks. Teddy was Harry's godson, his family, and Harry treasured that more than anything in the whole world.

The bitch hadn't let Harry see him.

Harry would never forgive her. He had begged, bargained, bribed, blackmailed, tried to pass laws, and tried negotiating with both the Ministry child services as well as the goblins' lawyers. Hell, if he hadn't cared about Teddy losing his only remaining family, Harry would have murdered her in cold blood. But it hadn't mattered. Remus and Tonks had never filled out the correct paperwork to make Harry's godfather status official, due to the war. Andromeda had custody and wasn't interested in sharing.

Not only was he not allowed to see his godson, Teddy was being brought up to blame Harry for his parent's deaths as well; he hated Harry, and it hurt.

Harry managed to get photographs of Teddy (illegally, using Kreature who had access to the Black wards that Andromeda had hypocritically protected her house with), but he had only held him once. Once. He had only got to see him a few times, and the last time, when Teddy was almost seven, he had sneered at Harry and told him to go away. Harry's heart had broken.

Now, all he could see in Remus was Teddy. Harry suddenly realised what it must be like for Sirius and Remus seeing him, if they truly thought James was dead.

The glass in the compartment door cracked. Harry clenched his eyes shut, realising his magic was getting away from him. Fighting the urge to cry, Harry desperately pulled behind layers and layers of occlumency barriers. Finally, he shut himself off completely, then opened his eyes again.

The three Gryffindors were staring at him in shock. Harry knew he could look very creepy when he blocked himself off like this. His face would go completely blank, his eyes dulled, and his Aura would buzz to absolute neutral.

'Potter?' Hermione spoke up carefully.

'His name is on his suitcase.' Harry supplied in monotone gesturing towards Remus. He hadn't actually looked to see, but he remembered it being there.

'Sorry, but I need to find my friends.'

Before any of them could complain Harry had gone, waving his wand to fix the glass on the way past.

Harry made his way down the train in a haze. He was vaguely aware of the twins yelling out two carriages later, and Draco nodding to him from the next compartment along. He saw Luna sitting and chatting with Ginny and two second year Hufflepuffs, but Harry couldn't deal with anyone from his past right now. Eventually he found Blaise, Theo, and all the Slytherin girls sitting in the last compartment on the train. They were avidly discussing Hogsmead when Harry arrived, so his blank mood wasn't noticed before he had time to mask it.

'-can't wait to see Dervish and Banges, they sell all sorts of magical instruments and gizmos. My brother found a snare-o-graph there once.' Theo was speaking as Harry opened the door.

'What on earth is a snare-o-graph?' Lillian asked. She was looking very brown after her Summer away.

'Who knows, but it looks cool!'

'Never mind that.' Tracey said, sounding very unimpressed with Theo's lack of knowledge. I heard there is a little tea shop, for couples and such. Their cakes are meant to be to die for.'

'You must mean Madam Puddifoot's Tea Shop. The place sounds horrible.' Blaise shuddered.

'Do you know much about Hogsmead then?' Millie asked. 'Dad doesn't talk about it much, and mum went to Beauxbaton.'

'Well it's the only uncontaminated, exclusively magical settlement left in Britain, which is rather sad.' Daphne said in a soft voice. Harry frowned slightly. There was still something off about her at the moment. It was hard to explain, but with all his emotions shut down Harry's brain became very analytical, and the behavioral shift was practically screaming at him.

'It's been there since some time in the twelfth century I think. I know it was headquarters for the goblin rebellion in 1622, and-'

'1612.' Harry corrected. Daphne rolled her eyes.

'Sorry Mr. only-person-in-the-entire-school-who-pays-attention-to-Binns. 1612. At any rate, it was the headquarters when Vallion beat out the gnomes, which is the reason we only have Gringotts running any financial institutions in Britain. The branch in Hogsmead closed down when the public started preferring to shop in Diagon.'

'Due to the influx of muggleborns who found it less daunting to visit London, no doubt?' Pansy sneered.

'That, and floo powder was invented in 1753.' Harry couldn't help but speak up, he was actually finding History very interesting this time around, and found he was absorbing the most interesting facts. While muggleborns parent did have a lot to do with it, it wasn't the main reason for the switch. 'The powder was outrageously expensive then, as they were still using powdered Dragon scales instead of pixie dust. The owner of the Leaky Cauldron opened its fireplaces for only three knuts a trip for anyone who purchased a pint, as enticement to visit Diagon. Needless to say it was successful.'

'It all sounds very dry. And in order to try one of those cakes you have to find a date too.' Millie looked rather desolate.

'Well I found the history interesting.' Daphne frowned. 'But I suppose you can get cheap thrills in tea shops, Honeydukes or by visiting the Shrieking Shack.'

'The most haunted place in Britain.' Theo nodded enthusiastically.

Harry let out a snort. Blatantly false, considering both the standard reaction to actual ghosts, and the fact that it had really been a werewolf.

'You do realise there are several ghosts living with us at the castle right?'

'Yes, but they don't moan and scream.' Theo dismissed.

'Horrid.' Tracey shuddered.

'It will be nice to have a closer supply of candy.' Millie said, changing the topic with a slight grin.

'It'll be nice to get out of the castle for a bit too.' Harry was mostly thinking of if he needed to sneak off again at any point, but several of the Slytherin's nodded.

'Mother said there used to be an ice-skating rink set up over Christmas at the back of the village.' Blaise added.

'Usually overrun by Gryffindors.' Daphne added, nose upturned just a bit. Blaise seemed to wince a little, but pushed on as if she hadn't snubbed him. 'And you're all forgetting the best bit. Butterbeer.'

'I prefer a cold Gillywater.' Daphne added.

Blaise sighed and turned slightly away from Daphne. 'Well some people will-'

Harry tuned them out, as the conversation degraded into sharp jibes and general squabbling. Harry would ask Blaise what that was all about later.

Eventually the argument was settled somehow and conversation resumed, but by that time Harry had pulled out the muggle studies textbook. It was rather outdated, though not as bad as Hermione had made out. Harry probably didn't really need to take the subject, as there were questions at the end of each chapter, and he was already three quarters of the way through with no problems, without having read the text. Still, the subject also covered the relations between wizards and muggles, as well as two GCSE exams (by NEWTS year), which were accredited in the muggle world. Harry would just see how it went this year, and then think about whether he wanted to continue.

The food trolley had been and gone, and Harry was just putting down his textbook, thinking of teaching the Slytherin's poker (as they were moaning over how boring exploding snap was), when the lights on the train flickered. Harry sat up straight and glanced out the window. The scenery had become much wilder and darker, and it had been steadily pouring for almost an hour. Harry had an involuntary shudder pass up his spine. He wished he could say he'd forgotten about this, but truth was he had just been trying not to think about it (rather successfully due to his active occlumency).

True to his fears, the train started to slow down.

'Hey, we can't be there yet.' Daphne sounded annoyed, and got to her feet and headed to the door.

'Sit down.' Harry's voice came out gravelly, and much harsher than he had meant it to.

Daphne turned back to face Harry alarmed, but something in Harry's demeanor must have told her he wasn't joking. She sat.

The train was getting slower and slower. As the noise of the pistons fell away, the wind and rain sounded louder than ever against the windows. Eventually, it came to a stop with a jolt, and distant thuds and bangs told them that luggage had fallen out of the racks. Then, without warning, all the lamps went out and they were plunged into total darkness.

Harry had his wand out and ready, and cast lumos almost immediately.

'Pull out your wands, if you can manage a cheering charm, it probably wouldn't hurt.'

'We don't learn I until later this year.' Daphne's voice was perfectly calm, but her eyes were giving her away.

'Potter why have we stopped?' Pansy didn't sound calm at all. She had scooted much closer to Millie and Lillian. Theo and Blaise scrambled to find their wands and both cast Lumos as well, brightening the compartment a little more.

Harry watched in a sort of morbid fascination as the window slowly spread over with ice.

'Harry. It isn't from-…' Blaise had a dawning expression of horror.

'Yes. Dementors.'

Harry could feel as the Dementors moved onto the train, and barely registered the Slytherin's horrified gasps. The cold was spreading, seeping into his bones. It took a great deal of will power not to just cast his patronus. Unfortunately, trying to explain that away would be quite difficult, and he would do it only as a last resort.

'I-… I don't like this.' Lillian squeaked out.

'Not particularly pleasant, no.' Harry stood up to face the door. 'Move closer to the window.' Harry knew he was acting a bit odd, but his emotions were still behind as many wards as he could manage, and he wasn't going to release then now.

Slowly, a darkness could be seen behind the glass of the door, and one of the girls started to whimper. Harry didn't know which one, as his mind was very far away.

The compartment door slid open silently, and Harry's worst fear floated in to the edge of the compartment. Harry had seen Dementors recently, in Surrey, but he hadn't been up close for a long, long time. It had been even longer since he'd been in contact with one without a patronus.

The cloaked figure towered to the ceiling, it's face hidden beneath its hood. For a second Harry remembered being on the edge of the lake with Sirius, the hoods down and the glistening, grayish, slimy-looking skin stretched and scabbed around the skeletal structure, an open gaping hole pulled taut in the middle of the eyeless face. Harry felt sick.

Before Harry could truly shake himself out of it, the dementor drew a long, slow, rattling breath. No doubt thriving off the high emotions of the room.

An intense cold swept over them all. Despite expecting it, Harry felt his breath catch in his chest. He had forgotten. The cold went deeper than his skin. It was inside his chest, inside his heart…

Harry could feel his eyes starting to roll, but with great will power he concentrated on occlumency drawing off all his emotions again, pulling behind every defensive occlumency barrier he had. It only helped just the tiniest of amounts, but it was enough to keep him focused.

'Sirius Black is not here.' Harry was almost surprised when his voice didn't falter.

Deep down, below many layers of mental wards, Harry felt as if he were drowning. There was a rushing in his ears like he was being submerged in water. From far away Harry could hear the familiar screaming- terrible, terrified, pleading screams. His vision started to swim, and the outline of his sister with her glamour flickering was beginning to form in his mind, Dumbledore's cold laugh echoing in and out mingling with his mother begging and Voldemort casting the curse.

Harry shook his head.

'No.'

The dementor kept drawing in, ignoring Harry. Harry clenched his wand, but at the last memory triggered an odd thought. He had seen Voldemort communicate with Dementors in his visions. Harry acted before he finished thinking.

.:Get out. Black is not here and you are not wanted. You are not allowed:.

Harry could feel a thick white fog swirling up inside him, and his body was freezing up, but after a second, the dementor stopped drawing in.

.:Perrrhhapsssss:.

It was only a whisper, and it wasn't truly parseltongue, more like a chilling whisper on the breeze: the sort that dominated dreary scenes in muggle horror movies.

The voice made Harry's skin crawl, but to everyone's obvious relief the dementor drifted back away from the door and into the corridor.

Harry stood facing the door for a moment longer, until he could feel that they had all left the train. His limbs felt heavy and dull, and he had to force them to move to pull his trunk down from the racks. It mad a loud clunk that seemed to echo in the dead silence of the compartment as it hit the floor. Harry spared the Slytherin's a glance, and saw that Blaise and Lillian seemed to be affected the worst. Blaise was backed right into the corner and had his eyes clenched shut, and Lillian was shaking so much her teeth were rattling. All of them were very pale.

'Here. This will help. I'm going out.'

Harry reached into the bag he'd bought in Notting Hill. Melt was meant to be one of the best muggle chocolate shops in London, and Harry had bought nearly thirty kilos of chocolate to last him the year. He pulled out a few boxes, handing one to Theo who was closest.

'Eat. Trust me.'

Harry grabbed a chocolate bar for himself then put his trunk away and slipped out of the compartment. He'd seen a compartment of firsties only a few spots further down. Harry let himself into their compartment without knocking. He cringed mentally to find three out of eight of them crying. Gods but he hated Dementors.

'Who- who are you?' One of the boys stuttered.

'Harry. Here, I've brought some chocolate. It will help.'

'What…' The little girl was shaking all over and didn't seem able to finish the question.

'They were dementors. Don't worry; they aren't a normal part of magical life by any means. They guard the prisons.'

'They were looking for Black?' Harry was surprised to see that one little girl was almost calm, but on closer inspection he realised she was just in shock.

'Yes. Eat the chocolate, please.'

Harry made sure they all got some before telling them it wasn't too far to the school, and cast a general cheering charm across the room before slipping back into the corridor.

Two carriages down he was intercepted by the Weasley twins, or rather, ran into George as they tried to step through the same door at the same time from the opposite side.

'Harry!'

'Don't sneak up on us like that.'

'Gave us a scare.'

'Frightful indeed!'

Harry noticed even their smiles were rather tight.

'Nothing on the dementors though, right? Have you had any chocolate? The textbook says it helps, and it made me feel a little better.' Harry asked, trying to make it sound looked-up.

'No. We gave ours to Ginny and her friends.'

'Have you seen them? Was Luna okay?'

'Looking out for your girlfriend?' They teased in unison. Harry opened his mouth to protest, but they continued before he could get a word in.

'They are as okay as us.'

'Which is to say-'

'-Not the best-'

'-But managing.'

Harry nodded. 'Right. Here.' Harry handed them the two boxes of chocolates he had left. 'Fudge said the dementors would be guarding the school. I brought supplies. Share them around, yeah?'

'Righty-o.' they said in unison.

Harry turned and walked back towards the Slytherin compartment. He'd mainly wanted to check on Luna. He mentally tried to convince himself on the walk back that he wasn't obsessed. Really. Gods he felt like a thirteen-year-old.

Draco, Vince and Greg had squished their way into the compartment with the others, but no one looked particularly upset about the close and cozy proximity.

'Have you heard?' Draco announced as soon as Harry entered. 'Weasley feinted. What a wuss.' Harry's bristles went up instantly, but he could hardly come to the defence of a Gryffindor. Well…

'Dementors effect people worse if they've had worse experiences. I, for example, hear my mother dying.'

Harry couldn't defend Ron, but he sure knew how to make Draco feel bad about it.

Draco spluttered, and Harry was vaguely aware of the girls giving him horrified looks, but his own jibe had actually distracted him quite a bit more than it had Draco.

He had heard his mother dying.

Dying!

She wasn't dead.

Harry frowned. Then what on earth was he hearing? He hadn't really thought about it before. He knew his parents were alive, but he had vivid imagery of his mother's death at least. This bore looking in to. Perhaps he would have to ask Remus once he'd figured out whether or not the man knew about his parents being alive in the first place. Either way he would have to make it subtle.

That was, if he could ever get over Remus looking like Teddy. Harry sighed.

Talking of which.

'Can we help you?' Draco drawled.

Harry looked up to find Remus had poked his head in the door.

'Everyone in here okay?'

Harry couldn't quite bring himself to meet Remus' eyes. Gods he even sounded a little like Teddy, in that soft-spoken way.

'We didn't feint.' Draco sneered automatically. He glanced at Harry from the corner of his eye, looking a bit chastised, but defiant.

'We had some chocolate.' Harry spoke up.

Remus turned to see who had spoken, and this time around Harry got to observe Remus' first reaction to seeing him after twelve years. Last timeline he had been passed out and missed it.

Remus drew in a sharp breath and his eyes widened in shock.

'My god you look like James.'

The sentence seemed to be torn out of him before he realised he was speaking, and it was followed quickly by a blush up Remus' cheeks and several curious looks from the Slytherins. Harry said nothing. He was internally a little relieved though; when Remus was awake his expressions made him look far less like his son.

'Do I? Can't say I'd know.' Harry eventually drawled. Around him all the Slytherin's had tensed up and were glancing between the two. 'Are we almost at the school then?' Harry pushed on.

Remus seemed to be a bit dazed. 'You don't know? But-… What? Oh. Oh, yes. You should get changed into your uniforms.' Remus glanced once more back at Harry before withdrawing. Harry could see Vince and Greg were already in their uniforms, but everyone else had to change.

'Come on guys. We'll let the girls change first.'

'Who was that?' Daphne demanded before Harry could slip away.

'Our defence teacher for this year.'

'Another one! …And how do you know him?'

'Yes another one. Expect a new one every year. Voldemort cursed the position.' Harry didn't answer the other question, and took their typical flinch as an opportunity to slip out into the corridor.

They were indeed quite close to the school, and by the time they had all changed the train was beginning to slow down. Harry suggested they all cast strong waterproofing charms on their robes and belongings, before stepping calmly into the night.