9. Singing and Sneezing Have a Direct Correlation
Lana's favorite time of the year is spring, same as Marin. The girls share a passion for it. Cia's second favorite season is spring, only beat out by summer. Only in the summer can she get a tan that lasts all year long, but she has to renew it annually. It's a good thing summer comes once a year. Wizzro's least favorite season is spring. That's when everything comes to life. He much prefers when everything dies, aka winter. Volga doesn't have a preferred season, and he wouldn't answer the question if you asked him. He feels that the seasons work as a cycle of life, and he doesn't think about trivial things like the meaning of life. Skull Kid loves all of the seasons equally, but he has just a small bias for autumn. No reason in particular.
Right this very instant, it is spring. Much to Lana's amazement, Marin's voice speaks to the flower buds. When she sings, they open, releasing their beautiful scents into the thawing air. Cia is disgusted when Marin and Lana prance around the Valley of Seers opening the flowers.
Ascending to the Guardian of Time's crib, Lana tells Marin, "I'd be ecstatic if we could fill this place with flowers!"
"No, you wouldn't," interjects a stern Cia.
Marin is disheartened. She asks, "Are you not fond of flowers?"
"Flowers themselves I'm fine with," Cia replies. "It's just when they unnaturally open in a mass quantity that doesn't appeal to me." Cia looks at Lana. She declares, "I have invited Volga and Wizzro for a marathon of War tonight, so you will not interfere. I won't tolerate flowers or joy of any kind. Are we clear?"
Marin gasps with horror. They are going to fight in the springtime? Cia notices her horror and clarifies, "The board game, darling." Marin relaxes. Board games are fun, even if they are about obliterating others.
When Cia excuses herself to welcome Volga like she always does, Lana pulls Marin to the side. "We should show Cia what spring is all about," she whispers with a smirk. Marin agrees. The girls plan to bring in a flower bud prime to bloom while Cia is entranced in the game. Then they will make it bloom and shove in Cia's face! Lana laughs, "Yeah! And then Volga will take the flower pot and say 'I summon Manhandla's wife to the battlefield!'"
"Excuse me?"
The girls go stiff. Cia and Volga are giving them weird looks. Lana smiles before saying, "Oh, never mind us." Marin initiates the plan by walking towards the exit. She says, "I'll just be on my way, Ms. Cia. Have a lovely evening."
"Goodnight, Marin." Cia doesn't suspect she'll be back.
As Marin descends the stairs, she passes Cia's second guest armed with a rake over his shoulder and a straw hat on his head on top of his robes. Marin has to stop and do a double-take. Wizzro stops too, as he can sense Marin staring at him just a little ways away. "What are you looking at?" he asks. Marin examines him more closely to discover a trowel attached to his side. It takes a moment, but she manages to successfully utter, "You wouldn't let me borrow that tiny shovel, would you?"
Wizzro takes the trowel by the handle. "Knock yourself out." He tosses it to her, but it flies over her head. "Ugh, bad throw," he mutters. He turns to ascend the stairs farther, but stops.
Marin has already descended the stairs to obtain the trowel. Then she faces Wizzro, who has just now followed her down. "Actually…" he says before switching his rake to her shoulder and using his free hand to move his hat to her head. He instructs, "You're just putting that to good use while I waste away playing stupid games with Cia. That isn't for you to keep."
"I understand. Thank you so much," Marin replies with a smile. Wizzro finds her happiness annoying; he was dropping his stuff onto her so he wouldn't be seen with it. He ascends the stairs without another word to Marin.
Twenty boring minutes later
Cia bellows, "You've got to be kidding me!" She's already losing the game, and it's only her third turn.
Using her limited foresight abilities, Lana is able to predict Marin's return. She eagerly rushes to the edge of the stairs. Volga watched her. He chuckles and asks, "Expecting someone were you?"
Marin carries a large bush, the roots and all. "I couldn't find any singular flowers that haven't already bloomed, but I found this." The red-haired girl far surpassed Lana's expectations with a multitude of flower buds waiting to bring springtime right here.
Cia is greatly displeased. She pushes her chair back, affectively nabbing the attention of her other half. She reminds, "I said we wouldn't have any springtime nonsense tonight, Lana."
"And I promptly ignored you."
The dark sorceress's patience is thinning faster than Tetra turns to stone. She has a mind to fight Lana. Thankfully, Volga reaches and takes Cia's hand. This affectively stops her in her tracks. "It's not worth a fight, Cia," he counsels.
Cia knows Volga is right. She sits down facing the game and her former minions. Strangely, they offer a sense of serenity. They provide routine, and she can mostly predict their moves. Ironically, she can rarely predict the manifestation of the light driven from her own heart.
Lana motions for Marin to sing. She does, and the entirety of the bush's population blooms majestically. Volga's sensitive nose is overwhelmed with its scent, which is reminiscent of Zelda's perfume. Oppositely, Wizzro lacks a nose, and therefore the sense of smell. (This can be a blessing and curse.) Instead, he complains, "Her hideous voice… Can't my souls get any decent unrest around here?!"
And Marin goes silent. A pang in her chest silenced her. Nobody has ever been so hateful towards her before. It's alarming and wounding.
"Wizzro, chill out," Cia speaks up. "That wasn't necessary to say."
"Since when have you been the kindness police?" he snaps.
Marin hands the bush off to Lana. Lana asks, "Are you alright?" Marin says that she is fine, forcing a smile on her face. She doesn't look Lana in the eyes.
Lana starts to head for the back of the area, taking the bush with her. She stops. She wriggles her nose. Her eyes start to water. Volga has been watching her.
The white sorceress takes a quiet inhale, followed by a second larger inhale. These first two steps are instantly recognized by the trio at the table. They gasp together in horror. Lana takes a final inhale, the largest one of them all. Duck and cover is Cia's first response.
Wizzro swiftly dives into the ground and returns to the surface directly in front of Lana, similar to Princess Ruto on the battlefield. He clogs her nose and mouth with his own two hands in a desperate attempt to cancel what comes next.
This is successful. Lana's sneeze is thwarted. Volga, who went stiff, slowly releases the tension in his muscles. The polite Marin says, "Bless you." Lana nods once to her, but she can't say anything with a mummy-like hand over her nose. She can't really breathe, either.
Wizzro releases the orifices of Lana's face. The following exchange is this: "Your hands are so rough." "Sorry."
Cia stands up and commands, "Lana, put the bush down." Lana is terrified, so she complies. She holds her hands up like someone just told to by the law enforcements.
At the moment, Marin is just as terrified as Lana. These people are so weird. She looks at the most sane person in the room, Volga. He apologizes for the previous events before referencing a chapter from the last Warriors Uncut.
"That is why we will never let Lana sneeze again," Cia adds.
Lana wipes her nose with a handkerchief. She then says, "You're not always going to be there to stop me from sneezing, Cia."
"Yeah, but," the dark sorceress responds. "If the others are in their right minds, they will prevent you from sneezing, too."
And nobody else had anything to say the rest of the night. Well, except for Wizzro, who remembered that he had let Marin borrow his gardening tools, but she didn't return with them. He at least wants the hat back! But she had already left for the night.
Marin is a morning person. The sunrise over the ocean has always been one of her favorite things. With that said, you can find her on Windfall Island every morning of every day.
This is where Skull Kid finds Marin today. Her ears are keen, so his stealth alarms her. She whips around to face the potential danger, her bell in hand. Skull Kid's hands go up immediately. Neither of them moves for at least thirty seconds.
Finally, Marin relaxes, lowering her bell in the process. Skull Kid's arms drop to his sides, and he says, "That was a wake-up call." Marin is amused, so she smiles.
That's when Skull Kid chuckles. This sends a chill down Marin's spine, as if traveled through by a ghost. In other words, the mood has shifted dramatically from a cheery morning to an ominous overcast.
"I suddenly want to play I Spy. I spy with Majora's eyes… something white with a green stem."
Marin looks around. Her gaze fixes on a lone crocus by the cliff. It is at rest, awaiting a beautiful day to open. That made Marin's day.
Skull Kid commands, "Make it bloom." Surprised, Marin looks at Skull Kid. Surely his request was a tease! There is no way he knows—she has only ever shown Lana.
Marin continues to look at Skull Kid. He frowns. "Do I need to repeat myself?" he growls. "I said make it bloom! I know you can." And Marin frowns. She says, "Say please."
His shoulders slouch. "Gruh… pleeaasse?"
"Good. Now how do you know I can do that?"
Bwuh-?! Now he has to explain himself?! This is no fun at all! The forest child's feet move like a drum roll before he comes to a complete stop standing straight and stiff.
Marin repeats, "How did you know I can make flowers bloom?"
Tael exits Skull Kid's hat. "We don't have to answer that," says Skull Kid whilst looking at Tael. He shoos his fairy friend back into the safety of his hat. Then he looks Marin in the eyes and says, "I could have slept in this morning, but I didn't. I didn't because I was too excited to sleep. I was patiently waiting for the sun to show up so I could come find you. And now that I've found you, you won't do what I want!"
"I already promised myself I would never bloom a flower again!" she yells over him.
Skull Kid is stunned. "Wh-why? It's so cool!" he cries.
Marin shakes her head. "Not when the pollen irritates Lana's nose."
"Lana's nose?" Skull Kid mutters. What does that have to do with anything?
"I- I don't know what would happen," the red-haired girl explains. "But something tells me I don't want to know." She follows this with some polite conversation, to which Skull Kid responds positively. Then Marin excuses herself with a "see you later."
Tatl floats beside her brother and Skull Kid. He actually walks on his own two feet for once. Tatl asks, "So, what did you want to do again?"
"This might be completely pointless, but at least we'll know if Marin is a fat liar or not," Tatl's warrior friend hints.
Tael says to nobody in particular, "I'm kinda hoping she was being serious. If something strange happens, I want to see it."
Tatl stops at the foot of the staircase. "Bleck! Tael, wait, can't you sense that?"
"No, but I can smell it."
Skull Kid giggles, "Heh, sorry."
"No, not that!" Tatl exclaims. "I think that nasty spirit blob is here!" Then Tael sees his sister's concern, assuming they are thinking of the same thing. That spirit blob has a habit of trying to capture fairies and extract their magic!
And with that, Skull Kid's fairy companions take their leave. But no matter, because all the company Skull Kid needs right now is his faithful rubber cucco, which he brought along stuffed full of a special substance that is sure to get the job done.
Volga is resting at the round table with his cup of decaf coffee. He likes it with milk and a small vanilla tang. Cia brews herself a cup while Lana makes waffles beside her. The dragon knight is the first to lay eyes on their visitor. The masked child waves to Volga, receiving an acknowledging nod in return. Volga about alerts Cia to Skull Kid's presence when-
SQUEAK! The rubber cucco bounces off Cia's head. This effectively startles her. Lana is also startled. The dark sorceress whips her head around and bellows, "Wizzro!"
The resting ring wraith jerks awake and tumbles off the couch onto his head. If he had legs, they'd be scrambling to get him up. Eventually he is upright and very much alert. He examines the area for an immediate source of jeopardy, meets eyes with Cia, and asks, "What?"
Lana collects the rubber cucco. She smiles.
"If you wanted Cia's attention," Volga speaks to Skull Kid. "You should have just called her by name."
"But what's the fun in that?" argues Skull Kid.
Cia growls, "That was an immature move! If Volga hadn't had spoken just then, Wizzro would have lost an arm!" This morning has been particular grim for the wizard, first with the wake-up-call, and now this comment.
That's when Lana shoves a plate of waffles in Cia's face. Her grin speaks for her. After a pause, the dark half of the Guardian of Time relaxes. She takes a single waffle and nibbles it plain.
Skull Kid retrieves his rubber cucco, which Lana dropped when she grabbed the waffle plate. "I needed your eyes to look in this, Lana," he says, and he immediately has Lana's full attention. The sneaky child levitates to be eye-to-eye with the white sorceress.
Lana inspects the only orifice in the rubber cucco; a petite oval between the limp legs. The bystanders are in an awkward position.
"I don't see-," and she is abruptly interrupted when Skull Kid crushes the toy with his hands. From it a cloud of black flakes shoots into Lana's face. Her face scrunches as a reaction, her eyes protected by her eyelids.
Cia is aghast. "What was that?! Gunpowder?!"
"Ashes?" Volga suggests.
"The remains of a Gibdo corpse?" You can guess who suggested that. Volga gives him a questioning gaze.
Skull Kid dodges out of the way. Lana sneezes.
Peculiarly, 'Skull Kid' hits the ground instead of using magic to continue levitating. Utter silence follows.
Slowly, 'Lana' looks down. A wave of realization hits, and 'Lana' gasps in despair. "No! Female intimate parts! This is a fate worse than death!" 'Volga' laughs hysterically.
In case it wasn't clear, Lana's voice didn't come out of Lana, but rather Wizzro's voice did. That is when Lana, from another location, says, "That can't be good." Skull Kid's body suddenly jerks up. The voices of two women scream from there. One voice is from Skull Kid's body itself, and the other from the mask. Cia cries, "What is this?!" She gazes at Skull Kid's body from his POV.
"Is it not obvious?" an unfamiliar voice from Cia's body coos.
Wizzro is going to strangle Skull Kid for this! He moves for his target… more like falls towards his target. He has never had legs before, so moving them to go forward is not instinctive. His face, technically Lana's, hits the ground with a smack. Lana saw the fate of her body through the eyes of Majora. She winces. The bodies of Cia and Volga think that was hilarious and laugh accordingly.
Cia gets a glimpse of her own body. It is acting without her consent, which only means someone else is controlling it. So she interrogates, "Hey! Which of you cretins has my body?!"
Her body looks at her and says, "You're in for an experience; you get to see the world from my perspective, or my puppet's perspective, at least." That's when Volga's body stands up. "Majora!" it calls in a child-like voice.
Majora has full control of someone's physical form for the first time in forever. He looks into the eyes of his puppet and says, "We're not small anymore, but that doesn't mean we can't cause trouble."
"You've got to be kidding me," grumbles Volga's voice. Majora's attention moves to the rubber cucco. It is standing on its own. Then Majora chuckles, "Now that's priceless."
Using Lana's arms, Wizzro is able to drag across the ground. When he feels something cold, he shivers. Raising Lana's head, he sees the ring. Without a soul possessing it, it's just a ring. It's strange not being bound to it.
Majora effortlessly strides for the staircase. Skull Kid in Volga's body asks, "Where are you going?"
"And how are you able to use legs?!" adds the immobilized Wizzro.
A first for everyone, the mask spirit is able to give a facial expression. Majora, raising and eyebrow, replies, "My incarnation… I've used limbs before, you know. And as for where I'm going, follow, and you shall learn." He takes a leap of faith, majestically gliding just above the stairs. Cia rushes forward to see what has become of her body after it disappeared below her elevation. She is astonished to learn that Majora didn't get a scratch.
"Skull Kid," Volga calls. "You need to follow Majora. I recommend doing so from the skies."
"The sky?!" Volga can't be serious. The farthest Skull Kid has levitated off the ground is about a foot.
Volga would roll his eyes, but he's currently using immobile, plastic eyes. It's a miracle they work. He says, "You can morph into a dragon."
Skull Kid laughs. "What, no! You're messin' with me!" He continues to laugh until he involuntarily exhales flames. The reality of the situation sets in, and all he can do is gawk with astonishment.
The dark sorceress grows impatient. "Well, what are you waiting for? Majora has a sufficient head start," she states. Lana fully supports Skull Kid.
The forest child nervously steps to the edge of the stairs. He can hear Volga squeak over to his side. The more experienced warrior is calm despite the oddity of the entire situation.
Volga instructs, "It will be easy to summon your inner strength when you are airborne. Don't fight the sensation; let it control you."
Skull Kid takes a deep breath. Then he believes he can. He takes a step back for a good running bound and goes! Gravity is instantaneous, and Skull Kid tumbles against the staircase. Volga would wince if this rubber cucco had any facial muscles. It is about halfway down the staircase that Skull Kid transforms Volga's humanoid form into his true form. The wings catch air in a forwards summersault, and Skull Kid glides off the ground.
The wing movement is natural, and Skull Kid is a flying dragon before he knows it. Granted, that hurt, but he has nonetheless successfully morphed. That was his first try, too! "Hey!" he calls. "Look at me! I'm a dragon!"
"Correction; I'm a dragon. You're a child in a dragon's body. Now go!" commands the great dragon knight. After recalling his objective, Skull Kid quickly discovers how to maneuver in the air and hurries in the general direction he believes Majora went. He couldn't have gotten far in Cia's measly, human body.
Lana is admiring her fellow warrior. Even as a toy Volga manages to exert prowess in leadership, wisdom, and an unmistakable, merited authority. Meanwhile, Wizzro masters the legs he will be using for a while.
Cia spots an inconsistency in plot. She turns to Wizzro. "Why are you struggling now if you took the forms of both Lana and Zelda during the war?" she bluntly questions.
"I hate to admit it, but that was a very observant question, Cia. Unfortunately for us, we are not in the position to question plot development. In other words, shut up." I couldn't have said that better myself, Wizzro.
It is a beautiful day at Lake Hylia. Princess Ruto and Young Link stretch in preparation for their dance lesson. Darunia prepares by eating. They eagerly await Fi's arrival. She was delayed by King Daphnes, but she is on her way.
Ruto is sliding down into the splits when Fi arrives. She almost has a perfect split. "I have arrived. Class can begin," informs the dance instructor. The very obedient and structured class aligns in a straight line, each about their arm's distance from each other.
Fi observes, "We appear to have an absentee."
"OOO, he's going to miss something important," YL calls like a child calling out that a classmate is in trouble.
"He notified me before committing to my class that his attendance would not be consistent. He, I quote, 'has obligations above personal priorities'," the teacher divulges.
YL snickers, "Yeah, whatever that means."
"Well, Link," Darunia gently reminds. "Sometimes things come up that make us busy, and Zant isn't exempt from those times."
Now it is Ruto's turn to snicker. She subtly insults, "Wow, what a large vocabulary you have. 'Exempt': where'd you learn that one?"
"That's enough, thank you, Ruto." Fi has studied and adopted teacher practices. And they're working. Her class is attentive and ready to learn.
Returning our attention to Majora, we as the readers learn that he is being guided by the beats of the tango. Every step is on point with the rhythm, leading him closer and closer. Fi nor her class seem to notice him walking on the lake.
It isn't until Majora gracefully sidesteps onto the shore that YL notices his presence. "Are you following?" Fi asks YL, but he is fixated by Majora's flawless movements. He, like everyone else will at first glance, believes Majora is Cia. One-by-one, Fi's class and eventually Fi herself turn every ounce of their attention to Majora. Not long after, Skull Kid catches up and discovers how to revert his morph.
The end of the song is too soon, but Majora expected that, and as such ceases to dance when the precise moment the music ceases to play.
Fi gives a singular nod of approval. "Impeccable timing, Ms. Cia."
Darunia shares his opinion outright; "I think she's heard this song before."
Majora is amused. "When you learn to let the music control you, you will be able to dance," he schools. The class is awed.
"Who would have guessed you could dance," whispers Skull Kid as Majora strides past him. The mask comments, "One of the many reasons you should let me have a little more control over you."
Lana remembered a little while ago that there might be a spell to reverse the effects of her sneeze in her spell book. However, she accidentally forgot it at Hyrule Castle during her last visit. The four mismatched warriors then took their leave of the Valley of Seers with the intentions of returning with the right tools to fix their predicament.
The first responder to the knock at the castle doors is Impa herself. She is met with what appears to be Majora's Mask levitating on its own accord. "We would like to speak with Zelda please," Lana states. Impa examines the company; Majora's Mask, Skull Kid, and Lana, who doesn't appear to be happy. She doesn't look far enough down to see the rubber cucco, so Volga walks in undetected.
"Princess, a special visitor has requested to see you," Impa informs Zelda.
Zelda turns to her other guests and says, "Please excuse me, King Daphnes." The king and other warriors representing the Era of the Great Sea are before her.
Entering the foyer, Zelda is met like Impa was. Her reaction is flinching with a wide-eyed stare. Lana in the mask's body floats before the princess. "Hello again, Princess Zelda," she cheerily greets. "We could really use your help."
Wizzro guffaws. "Actually we just need Lana's spell book back. If you didn't have it, we wouldn't be here," he corrects Lana's statement relaying it to Zelda.
Tetra accompanied Zelda into the foyer, leaving Medli and Toon Link to chat. She crosses her arms and asks, "So now you talk in first and third person?"
"Even if he did, that wouldn't be out-of-place," Cia mutters to herself.
Impa stands beside her princess assessing the situation silently to herself. Then Zelda leans in towards her and asks quietly, "What do I say to the floating mask?" How should Impa know? The general shrugs. She has faith Zelda will think of something.
"So," Zelda awkwardly exclaims. "The legends are true then. You really are a mask with a spirit."
Lana is frightfully confused. Cia's hand hits her face, but in reality it's not her face. Then it clicks, and Lana remembers that she no longer appears as Lana to others. "Oh no no, Zelda! I'm not Majora. I'm just in Majora's Mask."
"Then who the heck are you?" Tetra inquires bluntly.
Impa looks at who she believes to be Skull Kid and asks, "Then where's Majora?!" Cia once again brings her hand to her face.
Tetra looks down at the rubber cucco she didn't know was there until it says, "If you would stop and listen, perhaps we can tell you what happened." Tetra can only stare at the toy that sounds like Volga. After so long it starts to creep her out, so she punts it across the room.
Wizzro finds that funny. "Heh, when he comes back, do that again."
"What in the name of Din," Impa exclaims to herself when she realizes what's going on. "Lana, which body are you in?" "I'm right here," replies the white sorceress in a mask. "Ok, you're the only one Zelda needs to talk to," Impa concludes, forcibly turning Zelda's head so she is looking into the eyes of the mask.
The rubber cucco comes back on its own. "Ok," Tetra says before granting Wizzro's request. "Hey!" shouts Volga in midflight.
It doesn't take long for Zelda to understand the situation and for Volga to get really peeved in the background. Zelda smiles, saying, "Yes, of course Lana! Link has kept it safe since he discovered you left it." She turns to Impa. "Impa, will you please fetch Link?" Impa obliges.
Marin has just entered from the garden. When she's not at the beach or Windfall, she's most likely to be found at Hyrule Castle. The garden in the back is a safe haven for her. She smiles upon entering the busy foyer. Everyone she knows is there! (Not to say those are the only warriors she knows. Just last week she impressed Ganondorf with her origami skills, not to mention the time she was invited to a fairy party by Tatl where she and Tingle were the only humans there. It was culturally educational.)
"Hi Lana!" the dream seagull greets who she believes to be the white sorceress when they meet eyes. Wizzro is offended.
Then he notices that Marin is wearing his hat, the same one he lent her the previous day. "Hey!" he calls. "That's my hat! Where's my trowel and rake?!"
Only one warrior Marin knows would ask for that from her. "Wizzro?" she questions. Has she been deceived? Has his appearance deceived her? Besides just being mean, why would he do that to her?
He releases his breath in a defeated exhale. "Yes, I'm stuck in Lana's body," he confirms. Never before has he had bangs falling into his face.
"Did Lana ever end up sneezing? Is this what happens when Lana sneezes?"
"This is the worst of what happens when Lana sneezes," the wizard replies. Then he feigns a smile. "Aren't you a clever one?"
Marin smirks, her dark side showing. She snickers before saying, "Cool."
Cia gasps. She interrogates, "It was you who told Skull Kid to make Lana sneeze, wasn't it!?"
"I just told him I wouldn't open any flowers because Lana would sneeze," Marin replies indifferently with a shrug. Then in the style of Cia she puts one hand on her hip and points with the other, saying, "That must mean you're Cia."
Tetra has to chuckle. "Whoa, where did this come from? If you put her hair up in a bun and gave her glasses she'd be a cold secretary with hypnosis."
"Why hypnosis?" asks Volga. Tetra shrugs. She was making a reference, but nobody got it.
Then Link arrives carrying Lana's spell book, but he didn't manage to evade his previous incarnation from the Era of the Great Sea and the Sage of Earth. He relinquishes the hardcover to its rightful owner's body. Wizzro will happily take that off of Link's hands.
Other than Link stepping on Volga and jumping in surprise, the remainder of the visit was short and sweet. Zelda wishes her friends luck and Lana promises to visit soon after their predicament is resolved. On the way out, Marin has Wizzro's hat whisked away from her by none other than Wizzro himself. Using only his will he pulls the hat clean off Marin's head and into his hand like a magnet. His taunt—putting on the hat and sticking out his tongue with a smirk—is the last thing Marin sees as the castle doors close with the party on the outside.
The Twilight Princess doesn't understand when who she believes to be Cia attempts to fantasize what it would feel like upon her face. Ever since 'she' stepped into the throne room, something has been terribly off, which has put Midna on the defensive.
Majora is distracted when he hears the powerful beats of Skull Kid's wings. The mask spirit looks over its shoulder at the doorway and mumbles to nobody in particular, "I thought I lost him, persistent little thing." Majora is met with a fist to the side of the face, stumbling out of the throne room as a result. Skull Kid morphs back into Volga's human form in time to watch Majora spill into the floor.
Midna's magical hair returns to its semi-normal state, considering her hair isn't "normal" as an imp to begin with. Majora isn't amused; he didn't like that one bit. Yet, he smiles. "Hey Skull Kid," he speaks to his friend. "Do you wanna see something cool?"
"Is it as cool as this?" Skull Kid proceeds to dab.
"Ok, that was pretty sweet," Majora admits while standing up. He examines Cia's clothes briefly before making a decision. With a wicked chuckle, two tentacle arms grow from the sides of Cia's body directly under the ribcage. The arms lack hands, but they are considerably more flexible than the original arms. Additionally two more limbs sprout for leg usages within the skirt. Majora asks, "But how much cooler would it be to do that with five more limbs?"
As disturbed as Skull Kid is, Midna is twice as disturbed. She officially decides that this is the second most disturbing thing she has ever seen, the first being that prank where Ruto climbed out of an incision in Darunia's stomach… only to learn that it wasn't a prank. The third most disturbing thing Midna has ever seen was Link and Tingle and riding Epona in only their underwear, (don't ask why).
"Oookkkaaayyy," utters Skull Kid. "I think maybe it's time to see if our friends have made any progress." With that being said, he picks up Majora by the waist and hauls the mask spirit over his shoulder. Much to his surprise, Majora doesn't fight back.
The Twilight Princess doesn't know what to make of her brief experience. She isn't quite sure if anything she just saw was real… Maybe she should see a psychologist about that.
Lana forgot she doesn't have limbs. She exclaims "aw crap" after her spell book smacks onto the ground. Wizzro's attempt to give Lana the spell book was unsuccessful. "How in hexes am I going to pick that up without arms?" she asks nobody in particular.
"Why are there so many cuccos?!" The dark sorceress has taken the attendance of one man in a rubber cucco and several actual cuccos; her reaction is similar to a teacher's upon discovering there is a student in the class that shouldn't be there. It's the "why are you lost?" reaction. Volga reveals that the cuccos followed him docilely, so he didn't think anything of it.
Not surprisingly, all four warriors quickly become haplessly distracted with their personal affairs: Lana attempting to open a book with no limbs, Cia and Volga herding cuccos, and Wizzro examining the human body in further detail. (The anatomies of the different species of Hyrule have fascinated him since the beginning of his time.) Nobody notices Skull Kid romantically carrying Majora up the staircase like a scene from one of the warrior's fantasies about VolgaXCia. Linkle had a dream about that once and woke up with flushed cheeks.
Majora laughs at Lana and captions as a statement, "Welcome to my world." Skull Kid knows how to handle the cucco infestation; he roars with the back of Volga's throat, effectively frightening the birds away. Cia is able to focus her mind now that the primary issue is settled. Unfortunately, however, because of that she gets a glimpse of Majora retracting the extra limbs he grew. She honestly doesn't want to know anything about that; she knows it might scare her if she were to know.
Volga is the first to speak up about the situation, saying, "We are all accounted for. Take this opportunity to reverse your sneeze's effect, Lana!"
Aghast, Majora gasps. "No!" Then he scowls. "I don't know how your sneeze got me out of that mask, but I'm not going back!"
"I thought you were the mask," Skull Kid thinks aloud. Wizzro, a literally manifestation of multiple souls, knows what he's talking about when he says, "Skull Kid, when someone is given a name, the name isn't given to the body, but the soul. You would think this entire experience would have taught you that."
Cia guffaws. "That's the smartest thing you've said this entire story." She expects him to respond with confusion, but he doesn't give her the satisfaction of that. And does she really think he's an idiot? The fourth wall isn't exactly a secret.
When seemingly nobody is paying attention, Majora takes a leap of faith with the intention of getting down the stairs fast. But Skull Kid's reaction time is magnificent, giving him the ability to snag Majora's arm out of the air. If Skull Kid was his normal weight he would have been pulled down the stairs, but Volga's body has more girth. Majora is pulled into Skull Kid's clutches. He won't go back to the mask without a fight! Skull Kid actually finds it difficult to keep Majora from wriggling from his grasp; this is the first time Majora has desperately attempted to escape Skull Kid.
The tension escalated faster than Zant can spin. Cia is the first responder to the crisis, diving for the spell book. The moment she plucks it from the ground she rips it open in search of the right spell. Lana wants her spell book back, so influenced by panic she gets in Cia's way, literally getting in front of her face. Wizzro knows that neither of them can read, so he attempts to take the book. The book becomes a rope in a game of tug-o-war. "I need you, Majora!" Skull Kid cries, perfectly accenting the suspense of the chaos.
Fortunately, fate takes a turn for the better. Volga makes a daring decision that can either resolve the petty catfight or rip the cover off Lana's spell book. Property damage is not Volga's best interest, but it's worth the risk. He moves under the moving book as best he can and basically head-butts it with as much force as he can muster, which is actually quite a lot for the body he is currently possessing.
This is successful, and in an unlikely turn of events, that aroused magic in the enchanted pages. Light temporarily blinds everyone looking at the airborne tome, and they react like someone getting their eyes flashed from a photo would.
Lana is hit the head, the hardcover falling even further until it hits the ground, where it can fall no farther. She doesn't realize it, but she rubs a full head of hair with a fully functional arm and hand combo. Instead, her brain recognizes three objects on the ground: a rubber cucco, Majora's Mask, and the same object that smacked her in the head from the heavens.
Skull Kid is almost positive he didn't teleport, or at least not willingly. Oh! Never mind, he knows what's going on. Wait—where's Majora?! He almost misses the mask looking around so frantically, but he does see it and quickly reclaims it. He shows Majora some love first with a hug. Majora gives a silent sigh of acceptance. Then Skull Kid dawns his notable mask once again. That's much better.
Everyone else seems to recognize they have returned to normal simultaneously. Lana giggles, joyous as usual. Cia flinches upon realizing where she stands. "G-get your hands off of me!" she demands the dragon knight. He couldn't help that his body was holding Cia's before he reclaimed it. He releases her as she pushes away, resulting in her tumbling backwards towards the steps. Lucky for her, Volga catches her. He pulls her to flat ground before respecting her wishes in full. She is a little shaken, but manages to thank him nonetheless.
The white sorceress almost has a heart attack when her ring finger is shaken. Horrified, she tears the ring off that finger and tosses it to the ground. He's a little stunned as well, but he recovers without a problem, taking his robed form.
Lana scolds, "Don't do that!" What was Wizzro supposed to do? He wasn't going to let Lana wear him around. (Only Cia is allowed to wear him.)
"Well," Skull Kid mutters. "That was convenient." "No kidding. That was so easy there must be a catch," Lana agrees. Cia warns, "Don't jinx it." "Hiya heh! Too late, it's already jinxed," Wizzro remarks. Volga looks at Skull Kid and asks, "What gave you the idea to make Lana sneeze?" That sounded rather angry to Skull Kid, so he defends, "I just wanted to see what would happen! You can't blame me for curiosity!"
Lana looks at the entrance. Then Cia does the same. Eventually all of them are looking at Marin at the entrance. She shrugs. She was actually coming to return Wizzro's rake and trowel, then she heard Skull Kid yell for Majora during the commotion and hurried there. So, either way she was coming. Wizzro takes back his stuff... but, what did he do with his hat. He was last wearing it in Lana's body... but it's not there… Huh…
Speaking of Lana, she picks up Skull Kid's rubber cucco and examines it. "What was in this thing anyways?" She brings it a little close to her nose.
Author's Notes- Thanks to killerpokeball97 for the suggestion that heavily inspired this story. I loved the suggestion because it was so detailed. It challenged me to link (no pun intended) unrelated topics, like Marin's singing and a rubber cucco. I'd be ecstatic if I could get more creative and detailed suggestions in the future.