Author's Note: Obligatory apology note as real life got in the way and threw me for a loop every time I sat down to type out a chapter. Anyway, here is the third chapter of SIWS and I have almost finished the fourth. Until next time. -B
"Our pleasures are shallow; our sorrows are deep"
When I woke up the next morning, I wished more than anything that I could just fall back asleep and spend the rest of the day hidden from the world under my comforter. After my break down where Alice comforted me and then later my storm out when she tried to discipline me, the last thing I wanted to do was to go downstairs and face her. I tried snuggling back into my comforter but I really had to pee and my body refused to allow me to sleep anymore. Groaning, I sat up and reached for my cell to check the time. It was 7:40am and I sighed as I literally rolled out of bed. My suitcase was next to the door and I pulled out some clothes before going into the hall bathroom to get ready for the day. I had just finished applying my eyeliner when the bathroom door began to shake as someone banged on it.
"Shake a leg, Red!" Breakfast is ready!" My Uncle Emmett rapped a few more times on the door before stomping down the hall to make sure my brother and cousins were awake as well. I rolled my eyes and pulled my hair up into a messy bun before leaving the bathroom and heading downstairs. As I entered the kitchen, I was engulfed in a hug by my grandmother.
"Are you feeling a bit better, Scarlett?" she whispered into my ear. I sighed heavily and hugged her back.
"Not really." I whispered back and hung my head as her eyes dimmed and she held me tighter. I peered over her shoulder and saw Alice staring at me with a small smile on her face. She and my Aunt Rosalie had both been carrying breakfast dishes into the adjoining dining room but when I had entered the room, Alice had put hers back on the counter and looked like she was debating walking over and hugging me as well. Even though she had been there for me last night, I found that now that I was no longer a sobbing mess that I no longer wanted to be comforted by her. It still hurt to even look at her. My pain was buried so deep that I did not have a clue how to make the hurt stop or even if I would feel like myself without it.
Reluctantly, I pulled away from my grandmother's grasp and headed into the dining room, snagging an apple from the bowl by the counter as I did so. I brushed past Alice but didn't stop even when I heard her begin to say my name. My brother was already sitting at the table, thumbs moving furiously on his PSP. Normally, he was not allowed to have it during meal times but with all the chaos going on, I knew he was taking advantage of the lack of rules. My two cousins rushed in through the other doorway, nearly running into me in their mad dash to make it to their seats. I took my seat between my brother and the head of the table and started crunching my Honeycrisp apple. They were my favorite and my grandmother always made sure to have them around when I visited. Soon, we were joined in the dining room by the rest of our family. Alice tried to catch my eye before she sat down but I ignored her and tried to get my brother to put away his game. It was not until I threatened to remove the battery did he reluctantly put it down next to his plate and scowled at me the rest of breakfast. My grandmother loved to cook and this morning was no exception. French toast with syrup and powdered sugar, strips of bacon, a basket of warm biscuits with sausage gravy as a side, scrambled eggs with just a dash of spices, jugs of coffee, orange juice, and milk, and bowls of cut-up cantaloupe chunks and strawberries all competed for space around the 12-seat dining table.
After my grandfather delivered a short grace, the meal was subdued as everyone placed food on their plates and began to eat. The twins were the loudest and were busy telling anyone who would listen about how they wanted to catch frogs after breakfast. Grandpa Carlisle gave them a few ideas about where to find them near the house and even offered to find the net in the garage when he was done eating. I pushed the eggs around my plate and ignored the chatter around me until someone called my name.
"Scarlett, have you tried some of your grandmother's French toast yet? It's delicious." Aunt Alice asked me as Uncle Emmett nodded enthusiastically as he stuck an entire piece in his mouth. I shook my head as the twins roared in laughter at their father's antics and Aunt Rosalie simply rolled her eyes fondly at her husband.
"No, thank you. I'm actually full." I said, placing my napkin on my plate and standing from my seat. Alice narrowed her eyes at my covered plate.
"You barely touched your food." She stated. The chatter around the table ceased as all eyes followed the two of us. I blushed but managed to shrug a shoulder and picked up my plate and glass to carry it into the kitchen.
"You gave me a large serving of lasagna last night. I was not that hungry to begin with." I called over my shoulder as I left the dining room.
"She wasn't excused yet. We can't leave the table until we are excused." Complained my young cousin, Henry but my Uncle simply shushed him.
"She ate an apple. Scarlett doesn't like breakfast." I heard my brother speak and smiled as I listened to him defend me even though he was still annoyed at me. I scraped my still full plate in the garbage, drank the rest of my orange juice, and placed my dishes in the dishwasher. Once that was done, I ducked out of the kitchen and went upstairs to grab my phone.
Hey girl, Rise and shine. –Piper
Call me when you wake up. I have soccer practice at 8am but my mom said I could skip it. –Piper
I'm here if you want to talk. My mom offered to let me have the car so I can come by tonight instead of in the morning. Let me know what you would like to do. Better to ask forgiveness than permission right? Lol. –Piper
Your phone better be off and you're just too busy to get ahold of your best friend who has been using up her texting plan to talk to you. Love ya girl. –Piper
I smiled softly. Piper had promised to message me all day and so far was holding true to her word.
I'm here. Sorry, family breakfast. If you could come over tonight that would be great and I would be thankful. I'll ask permission when I go back downstairs. –Scarlett
I was in the middle of scrolling Instagram and waiting for Piper to text me back when there was a sharp knock at my door. Dreading to look, I let out a sigh of relief to see that it was only my Aunt Rosalie standing at the open door.
"Can I help you?" I asked, making sure to keep any attitude or sarcasm out of my voice. She took a step inside and crossed her arms over her chest.
"I heard that you allowed Alice to comfort you after your breakdown last night." She said bluntly. I sighed and tossed my phone on the bed. I opened my mouth to bite off a retort but her eyebrow raise caused me to close it instead. Once she knew that I was not going to say anything, she took two steps forward and hugged me tightly.
"I am so proud of you." She whispered into my ear. I could only nod as my head rested on the edge of her collarbone. After a few minutes of simply holding me, she let go and led me to sit on the edge of the bed with her. I cleared my throat and avoided looking at her as I asked a question.
"Why are you proud of me, Aunt Rose?" I mumbled at the carpet. I didn't have to look at her to know that she was scowling at me.
"Are you kidding? You're letting someone in past all of your defenses, Scarlett." I shifted uncomfortably as I continued to listen.
"You and I are so much alike that I am surprised neither one of us have killed each other yet. You have this idea in your head that crying makes you weak. That you have to hide what you are feeling in order to be strong." I took a deep, shuddering breath and clenched my fists, my nails digging into my palms. I still felt raw and numb from sobbing last night and I refused to cry again in front of someone. Old habits were hard to break and I focused on the pain until I was able to control and calm myself.
"I'm fine, Aunt Rose." I muttered, hoping she would leave me be. She bumped my shoulder with her own.
"I just want to look out for you. I know you would rather bury it in the past but I still remember everything that happened two years ago and I refuse to allow you to revert back to that person again. We almost lost you once. I won't go through that again." She whispered the last words and I hesitantly shifted closer to her so that she was holding me.
"I'll be okay. I'm not that person anymore, I promise." I whispered into her chest. She rested her head on top of mine until a knock on the door startled the both of us.
"Am I interrupting?" Alice asked, looking at us from underneath her eyelashes. I sighed but shook my head in the negative. She smiled and joined both of us on my bed. Alice tapped my thigh and handed me a small bowl of yogurt with almond slices and cut up strawberries on top.
"You have been up here for over an hour. I'm sure you must be hungry by now." She said with a soft smile as she handed me my spoon. I took the bowl and mumbled my thanks before looking at my Aunt Rosalie pleadingly. She brushed my forehead with a kiss before reaching for the T.V. remote and flipping through the channels before settling on How I Met Your Mother.
"Alice and I just want to catch up on this episode. Then, we can find something on Netflix or Hulu to watch as well."
"But it's a re-run." I protested, hoping that the two of them would leave the room. Neither of them budged. Instead they made themselves more comfortable at the foot of the Queen-sized bed and proceeded to watch the show.
"There are other televisions in this house, you know. In fact, I'm pretty sure there are more T.V's than people in this house." I stated as sarcastically as I could manage, sticking a spoonful of yogurt into my mouth. Rosalie nudged me with her foot but otherwise they both ignored me. I sighed deeply to let them know I was irritated and resigned myself to watch the show. By the time it had ended twenty minutes later, I had managed to eat almost the entire bowl of yogurt. I placed the bowl on the nightstand and wiggled in between the two of them, grabbing my Blu-ray remote and turning on Netflix.
"Not hungry, huh." Rose stated matter-of-factly without looking away from the screen. I blushed in embarrassment and quickly chose a movie. When Alice made to leave the bed, I surprised the both of us by clutching the hem of her shirt, holding her in place.
"Please stay. Both of you." I whispered to the bedspread. I felt them snuggle closer to me as I continued to pick out the abstract thread pattern. I propped up my chin with the cup of my hand and focused on the television as Silver Linings Playbook began. Jennifer Lawrence must have good genes as she had barely aged even after all this time. I must have dozed off because when I remembered looking at the screen again, she and Bradley Cooper were already practicing their dance sequence. My phone vibrated and Alice handed it to me as she was closer. I unlocked the screen and checked my messages.
Hey girl. Sounds like a plan. I'll be there by 3. Love ya!–Piper
I let out a short laugh and nudged my Aunt Rosalie with my shoulder.
"Is it okay if Piper spends the night tonight instead of tomorrow? I was already spending the night with her on Saturday so I can just ride back with her then." My Aunt raised her eyebrows.
"I thought she was spending the night on Thursday night and you were spending the night Friday?" she asked. I refrained from rolling my eyes. If I pissed her off she would say no just to annoy me.
"Yes, but Piper asked if she could spend the night tonight so that she would be there for me all day tomorrow and Nana already said she could spend the night on Thursday so I don't feel it is that big of a deal." I said, shrugging one shoulder for emphasis.
"Our flight is Monday morning, Scarlett. That doesn't leave you a lot of time to pack." Alice interjected. I huffed out a breath and ran my fingers through my hair.
"I need her here though. Especially if I have to abandon my friends that I have known practically my whole life come next week." I said, glaring at her to protest. Alice hung her head and I felt my Aunt Rose stiffen beside me.
"If you want your friends over, I suggest you knock off the attitude." She warned in that frosty tone of hers. I scowled at her but bit my tongue. I would need Piper to get through the day tomorrow and she couldn't be there for me if I messed up. I stared at the stitching in the comforter.
"I'm sorry." I muttered to both of my aunts, keeping my gaze on the stitching of the comforter underneath me. Alice hummed next to me but otherwise the room was quiet for the next few minutes as we all gathered our thoughts.
"What if on Friday I spent the afternoon in Seattle with Piper and we boxed up my room that day? Her parents only live two blocks away from my house and her older brother has a truck we could borrow." I asked hesitantly, trying to compromise. I was still getting used to having to ask to do things. My father worked so much that we frequently only left notes for the other one to find at our old house. Rosalie looked over at Alice and they had a silent conversation over my head before agreeing.
"That could work so long as you make sure to get your room packed that day. Use the suitcases in the attic for the stuff that you are bringing with you on the plane. Anything you want shipped to New York, will have to be brought back to your grandparent's house on Saturday." Rosalie said.
"Jasper and I packed light for this trip so you can pack an extra suitcase if you need to. We won't use it otherwise, Scarlett." Alice interjected as she tried to put her arm around my shoulder. I gently shrugged it off and rolled off the bed. Ignoring her hurt look, I held up my phone.
"Thank you again. I'm just going to call Piper really quick and tell her what the plans are." I gave both my Aunts a tight, fake smile before I left the room and dialed the familiar number.
"Finally! I was really getting worried about you, babe. We never go that long without talking unless we are fighting." I allowed a real smile to grace my face for a moment as I let my best friend ramble on.
"Sorry, just busy with everything going on. Aunt Rosalie agreed to letting you stay tonight and tomorrow night by the way." I replied while making my way down the stairs.
"Of course she did because she likes me better." I could feel Piper's smug grin across the phone and affectionately rolled my eyes.
"Yes, I am sure that was the reason she agreed." I said sarcastically.
"I'm not the one that crashed her beloved 1978 ZZL Camaro so of course she still likes me best." Piper teased back.
"1969 ZL1 Camaro." I instantly corrected. Heaven knows how many times it was screamed at me along with all the features it possessed over the past two years.
"Yeah, yeah, yeah. I should be there in about an hour, okay? Love you!" I repeated the sentiment before hanging up the phone. I had made it into the den where my brother was playing Call of Duty again. Wincing at the noise, I watched my little brother play for a few minutes before I grabbed a controller and joined in.
"So how are you feeling about all of this?" I asked softly. Mason shrugged a shoulder.
"Uncle Emmett lets me play video games a lot more than Dad did...but I miss Dad." He said back as he proceeded to throw a frag grenade at my on-screen character. I nudged his shoulder and gave up trying to kill him, focusing on staying alive instead.
"Did he tell you that I have to leave next week?" I asked, ready for him to explode into a melt-down. Mason sighed heavily.
"Yes, but you will Skype, call, and text me all the time. You are not leaving forever and your next break from school is in six weeks and you will come back here to visit me." He stated matter-of-factly. I took my eyes off the screen and winced as he killed me yet again.
"How do you know where I am going to school before I do?" I asked. Mason shrugged again.
"It was after you got home last night. I had my headphones in but my Ipod died. I forgot to take them off and then Aunt Alice mentioned where she was enrolling you to Grandpa Carlisle and Nana Esme." He scowled and paused the game, leveling me with a look of irritation.
"If you're not going to play then can you leave? I want to play online." I held up my hands in surrender and signed out of the game.
"Do you remember what the school is called?" I asked him. Mason shrugged his shoulders, his gaze already hyper-focused on the screen.
"I only have twenty more minutes to play. Ask me later." He said without looking at me. I ruffled his hair before standing and wandering into the kitchen. I heard hushed whispering before I entered the room and the conversation ceased once I did so. Nana Esme, Aunt Alice, and Jasper all stood around the kitchen and from their expressions I would hazard a guess that they had been arguing about something. I raised my eyebrow at the noticeable tension but otherwise ignored the three of them and went to the fridge for a glass of water which I quickly finished.
"Hey Grandma, Aunt Rose said it was okay for Piper to spend the night tonight too and she should be here by three this afternoon. When she gets here do you mind if she and I walked around Forks and grabbed food?" I noticed Jasper staring pointedly at me while Alice and Esme both had distressed looks on their faces.
"Well are you sure that your Aunt Rosalie agreed to having Piper over an extra night, Scar?" she asked, wiping her hands on a dish towel. I nodded and jerked my thumb at my aunt.
"Alice was there too and heard her say that it was okay if you don't believe me." Jasper scowled but Alice simply touched his arm as she continued to stare at me.
"Rose did agree that her friend could stay tonight as well." She finally told my grandmother who nodded.
"Well if both of your Aunts allowed it then I do not see a problem with it. As for going into Forks I don't mind but you both need to be back by seven at the latest." Esme made sure to enunciate the word "Aunts" in her sentence, but I paid it no mind as I gave my grandmother a half-smile and allowed her to hug me. Glancing at the clock, I noted the time. Just a little under an hour until Piper would get here. After a minute or so of allowing my grandmother to try and comfort me, I gently eased out of the hug.
"Are you hungry, Scarlett?" Alice asked as I went to leave the kitchen through the back door. I shook my head and tried to ignore her protests as I made to leave the room. Emmett stood in the doorway, eating a bag of Doritos and accidently blocking my exit.
"Excuse me." I muttered, trying to walk around him. The pause, however, had given Alice enough time to reach me from across the room and she lightly placed her fingers on my upper arm. Leaning in close to my ear, she made sure to whisper so that no one else could hear our conversation.
"Please, you need to eat something. I don't care what it is but you are not leaving this room until I see you finish something." I groaned and flinched away from her contact. Scowling, I made my way to the counter and collapsed onto one of the barstools. I propped my head up with a hand under my chin and directed my angry gaze at my least favorite aunt.
"So what are you planning on forcing me to have?" I taunted. Jasper shook his head and Alice took a deep breath and pinched her nose between her thumb and index finger.
"Hey, Jasper, Mom, why don't we go grab the boys and take them out for pizza? I know Henry and Nick are always up for that. They take after me when it comes to food." Emmett winked and ushered Nana Esme and Jasper out of the kitchen, leaving Alice and I to continue our battle of wills without an audience. I drummed my fingers on the edge of the counter when it became obvious that neither one of us would be saying something. Alice sighed again and walked over to the fridge before opening it and peering inside.
"I don't know why you have to make everything such a big deal." I muttered and Alice's head shot around the door and stared at me incredulously.
"You're kidding me, right?" she deadpanned. I ran a hand through my hair and slumped further in my seat.
"You act like I have an eating disorder or something." I shot back, "Maybe I'm just grieving and don't feel like eating right now." Alice shut the fridge door and walked towards me, keeping the counter in between the two of us. I stared at her face but when I saw sympathy in her dark blue eyes, I looked down at the granite counter top instead.
"Scarlett, how many therapist appointments have you missed over the past few weeks?" she asked softly.
"Five." I eventually said, knowing that she had to already know the answer or be close to it. She reached across the counter and grabbed my hand, giving it a light squeeze.
"I know that this has been extremely stressful for you but you can't skip out on your appointments. They were put in place to help you thrive, baby girl." I squirmed but allowed her to continue to hold my hand. After a few minutes of silence, I finally looked up at her.
"Can I have a grilled cheese and fried green tomatoes?" I asked. Alice's eyes became bright with unshed tears but she nodded and gave my hand another squeeze before releasing it. As Alice puttered around the kitchen making my lunch I pulled my phone out again.
Almost there. Can't wait to see you! -Piper
I typed out a response and continued playing around on my phone until a plate slid in front of me. A grilled cheese sandwich with bacon and avocado had been sliced into two triangles while a handful of fried green tomatoes sat on the side with a cup of zesty ranch to dip them in was also on the plate.
"Thank you." I replied automatically and she squeezed my shoulder lightly before busying herself with cleaning up the kitchen. I managed half the sandwich and ate a few tomatoes before the back door opened and my best friend came inside, leaving a puddle of water on the tile. Kicking off her shoes, she clambered onto the barstool next to me and stole one of my tomatoes, popping it into her mouth whole, smirking at me with her dark brown eyes full of mischief. I shook my head at her and pushed the plate closer to her so that she could grab another. Once she finished chewing she groaned theatrically.
"Why do we have to live in the state of constant rain and dampness? It is so depressing to see dark clouds all the time. I mean the sunshine state is only two states away but we live in the state of constant darkness. Horror movies should only be filmed in Washington; we have the atmosphere for it." I shrugged and half-tuned her out as she continued to berate the weather and steal my food. I moved to get up from the counter when the clearing of Alice's throat stopped me. She raised an eyebrow and gestured to the remaining half of my sandwich left.
"Finish it." She stated matter-of-factly as she continued to dry the dishes. I scowled but slowly sat back down in my seat. Piper looked wide-eyed between the two of us as I slowly took another bite of my food. Once Alice had turned back to the sink, I bolted out of my chair with Piper right behind me. I flew through the kitchen and opened the back door.
"Bye Alice, we will be back by seven!" I called out to my aunt who had barely managed to turn all the way around from doing the dishes. I ran across the still-wet driveway and the two of us climbed into Piper's mom's car and raced out of the driveway. Looking out the rearview mirror, I saw Alice standing in the doorway of the back door, a dish towel in one hand and her cell phone in the other. I slumped in my seat as Piper eased down the driveway and turned on the main road towards Forks.
"She's going to kill me for that." I muttered. Piper shrugged one shoulder as she played with the radio.
"Well we are already out of the house so we have a few hours for her to calm down before we come back." She said calmly. As the youngest of four children she was used to be getting into trouble. I swatted her hand away from the radio.
"Both hands on the wheel and eyes on the road." I instructed as I flipped through stations. Piper snorted but did as I asked.
"I'm a great driver, Scarlett." She protested as I settled on some classical music.
"So was my dad." I shot back between gritted teeth. Piper winced and opened her mouth to apologize but I shook my head, unwilling to talk about it further. We drove around for a bit before stopping behind a gas station. Piper dashed inside and came out with two large drinks, a bag of sour gummy worms, and a can of pizza Pringles. I opened her dash and pulled out a pack of cigarettes. Lighting two, I passed her one before pulling my feet up onto the dash and taking a deep drag of mine.
"Alice made me give her all my cigarettes yesterday. I haven't had one in over a day." I complained. Piper whistled low.
"You have been smoking on and off for two years and the Aunt that you never see is the one that finally catches you? Tough break." She nudged my shoulder with hers as we both sat and quietly smoked, sipping on our drinks.
"I can't believe I bury my father tomorrow and pack up to leave thousands of miles in just a few days. It feels so surreal, like it isn't happening to me but someone else that resembles me…does that make sense?" I pondered out loud. Piper hummed but simply allowed me to talk without any judgement. I flicked the spent cigarette out the window and lit up another one.
"So we are still going to Tristan's party this weekend. Even with everything going on, babe?" Piper cautiously asked me. I nodded firmly.
"Believe me, I could use a drink or several bottles of liquor at this point. I just want to get completely black out drunk and drown my sorrows for a bit." Piper bit her lip and threw her butt out the window but refrained from lighting another, grabbing the bag of candy instead.
"What" I asked gruffly. She bit her lip again before answering.
"Tristan likes you a lot and with the way you're talking I just don't want you to get too carried away and regret anything." She whispered, squeezing my knee. I sighed and took another drag, running my other hand through my long hair.
"I don't plan on sleeping with him at the party but if it happens it happens. Besides, I will have my best friend attached to my hip babysitting me all night, right?" I asked lightly but pleaded with my eyes for her not to leave me alone. She smiled and nodded slightly.
"I'll stay so close to you that Tristan will think we are Siamese twins. Let's see what that does for little Tristan." She wiggled her eyebrows comically as she bit the head off of one of the worms and I laughed. She grinned back before sobering up.
"I still can't believe you will be in NYC come Monday." She quickly wiped away a tear as we shared watery smiles.
"I know but I promise to call and text and Skype. Plus, I will be back during break and I'm sure if I beg enough I can convince Alice to let you come stay the weekend with me and show you around New York." I tried to cheer us both up with that idea. Piper wiped away another tear and grinned back at me.
"You better bitch. I want to see all the sights and sounds of New York. Let's check out the boroughs, Madison Square Garden, Times Square, Broadway, and Ellis Island." She said in a horrible New York accent. I laughed again and nudged her before settling back in my seat. I was perfectly content to spend the rest of the time we had in a car with my best friend; laughing at stupid jokes, listening to the rain, and comforting each other the best way we knew how.