Disclaimer: I own nothing

Love has always been a funny and unexpected thing. Sometimes, though, it's hilarious and completely random.

Dragon's Love

(#1: Erza)

"Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah…" Natsu groaned as he followed Erza through the market.

"Don't groan like that, Natsu. It's unbecoming." Erza stated sternly.

"But I'm so bored…" Natsu sighed pathetically.

"Don't worry, we'll be done soon." Erza smiled.

"You said that an hour ago…" Natsu grumbled.

It might seem like an usual sight, but this had become more and more common since Erza made the weird decision to date Natsu. No one knew why the knight would wish to court the dragon, but after the events of the Tower of Heaven, Erza had grown closer to the fire dragon slayer. Eventually, Erza approached Natsu and demanded a date. Of course, Natsu tried to turn her down, but he quickly learned that it wasn't a choice.

"Gahahahahaha!" Gajeel laughed as he saw Natsu following Erza's orders. "That's hilarious!"

"I think it's sweet…" Levy smiled at the couple.

"Maybe from a girl's perspective, but from mine, he's totally whipped!" Gajeel grinned.

"Hey! I can hear you!" Natsu shouted at his fellow dragon slayer.

"That's the point, flame brain!" Gajeel chuckled.

"Don't start a fight, Natsu." Erza commanded.

"…Okay…"

"And you, stop antagonizing my boyfriend." Erza glared at the iron dragon slayer.

"…Whatever…" Gajeel grumbled.

"Natsu, I'm going to go try on a few dresses and then we can go for lunch." Erza informed the pink-haired man.

"Alright…" Natsu nodded as she walked off.

"Hmm…" Levy tilted her head. "That seemed a little cold."

"Huh?" Natsu questioned.

"She didn't hug you or kiss you or anything when she walked off." Levy noted.

"Erza isn't one for public displays of affection…At least that's what she said. Not like I care all that much." Natsu shrugged.

"Oh…" Levy nodded slowly.

"What about when you're alone?" Gajeel questioned with a smirk.

"Gajeel!" Levy's face turned red. "You shouldn't ask about things that are so private!"

"What? I was just wondering…" Gajeel elbowed his fellow dragon slayer. "Come on. Is she all freaky when you're alone together?"

"Freaky? Hmm, I guess." Natsu nodded slowly. "Last time I had plenty of scratches all over my body."

"Ah…" Levy clapped her hands over her mouth as her face flushed even more.

"Oh ho ho!" Gajeel's eyes glinted. "Is that so?"

"Yeah, but it's not like she comes out totally unscathed. She tends to limp a lot afterwards." Natsu explained with a grin. "I'm relentless after all."

"Ah!" Steam seemed to be coming off of Levy's head now.

"I'm sure!" Gajeel seemed to be loving this. "So it's good?"

"It's great! I really love when she brings out the-"

"Pigs! Dogs! Disgusting creeps!" Levy glared at them. "How can you talk about the matters of the bedroom so carelessly in public!?"

"Bedroom?" Natsu blinked. "What does the bedroom have to do with anything? We're usually in the forest so we don't destroy anything important."

"Oh, this is so great." Gajeel was laughing. "The great and mighty Titania likes kinky sex in the forest!"

"Sex?" Natsu was super confused. "When did we start talking about sex?"

"Huh? You stupid or something? That's all we've been talking about." Gajeel rolled his eyes.

"What? No. I've been talking about fighting." Natsu noted. "Erza lets me spar and fight with her all the time because we're dating. It's awesome. She really gets me all fired up."

"Oh…" Levy seemed to calm down a lot. "That…that's a lot better then."

"Why did you think I was talking about sex?" Natsu questioned.

"Moron! You said that she kept scratching you and that you left her limping!" Gajeel growled. "Of course we assumed you were having kinky sex."

"What? You do know that she uses swords and I tend to hit hard, right?" Natsu blinked.

"Gah…You're the biggest idiot ever." Gajeel scowled.

"Well…I'm glad that you have at least enough tact not to talk about your love making with Erza in public." Levy smiled at the dragon slayer.

"What?" Natsu blinked again.

"Sex. She's glad that you don't talk about sex in public." Gajeel grumbled.

"Oh…well, we never did that yet." Natsu mentioned.

"Oh…so she's a prude?" Gajeel questioned.

"Gajeel!" Levy cried in indignation.

"Prude? I don't know what you mean." Natsu frowned. "Is it bad that we haven't had sex?"

"No! It's nice that you're willing to take things slowly." Levy smiled. "Love making is an intimate and important thing.

"Man, sex must be important if both you think it is." Natsu realized.

"Of course it is!" Gajeel snapped. "That's what all guys want out of their relationships after all! If I had a girlfriend, I'd be constantly asking for it."

He never noticed as Levy gained a hurt and embarrassed look all at once.

"Oh…You know what, now that I think about it, maybe Erza did want sex." Natsu gained a pensive look. "That would explain the strawberries, whip cream, and lacy underwear she bought last week."

"Oh?"

"Yeah, in fact, every week, she's brought me out to go shopping and bought some really weird stuff." Natsu shrugged. "I guess I never connected the dots. Oh well, I don't think I'm missing out on much."

"…Dragneel…" Gajeel gave Natsu a sour look.

"Yeah?"

"On the behalf of all men, I want to say that you're the biggest idiot on the planet and that we all hate you."

"Oh…okay then."

(#2: Juvia)

"Here you go, Natsu-sama~" Juvia cheered. "Juvia-chan made you lunch!"

"Really!? That's great!" Natsu took the boxed lunch and grinned at the girl. "You're awesome!"

"Ah!" Juvia clutched her flushed face and swooned. "Natsu-sama complimented Juvia-chan! Juvia-chan is so happy!"

Natsu tore open the box and began eating.

"No fair, Natsu!" Happy pouted. "Why do you get food!?"

"Juvia-chan didn't forget Happy!" Juvia smiled and produced a fresh fish that was bigger than her head.

"FISH!" Happy jumped up and down. "I love you, Juvia!"

"Juvia is glad that Natsu-sama's best friend feels that way!" Juvia sat next to Natsu and leaned onto him as he ate.

Across the guild hall, people watched the odd couple. It had been this way ever since Natsu and Juvia fought during the war between Fairy Tail and Phantom Lord. The water woman became obsessed with the fire dragon slayer. Natsu didn't seem to care all that much. In fact, when Juvia began to bring him food, he fully embraced the woman as a friend. When Juvia asked for more than regular friendship, Natsu quickly agreed. After all, her food was divine, she was super fun to be around, and she was always complimenting him.

What more could he ask for?

"It's weird…" Elfman noted to Grey. "I never thought about Natsu being a man and having a girlfriend."

"Meh." Grey shrugged. "I guess any idiot can get a girl to love him with enough dump luck."

"You don't care?" Cana questioned.

"Actually, I'm glad. Natsu annoys me a lot less with her around." Grey shrugged. Of course, as he did this he absentmindedly removed his shirt.

"I thought you would be mad that your rival has a girl literally flinging herself at him while you have no one." Cana took a huge swig of her barrel of beer.

"Geeze, you make it sound like I'm missing out on something." There went Grey's pants.

"I just thought that a guy that can't keep his clothes on would want a woman to take notice." Cana rolled her eyes. "By the way…your clothes."

"Shit! Not again!"

Back across the guild, Juvia was still chatting with Natsu.

"Do you want Juvia-chan to feed you, Natsu-sama?" Juvia questioned.

Natsu swallowed his food. "But if you do that, then I won't be able to eat as fast and won't get enjoy all of your food before it gets cold."

"Ah~ Natsu-sama is so smart!" Juvia cheered.

"Thanks!" Natsu grinned. "You know what, Juvia. You're the nicest girl I ever met. No one ever did so much for me before."

"Juvia-chan is so happy that you're pleased!" Juvia's eyes sparkled.

"Is there anything I can do to repay you?" Natsu questioned.

"Well…Juvia-chan has prepared a picnic for us later tonight. It will be so romantic under the moonlight~" Juvia swooned.

"Ah…okay. If that's what you want." Natsu nodded. It seemed rather simple to Natsu, but Juvia seemed to like this plan.

"And after wards, maybe you can over to Juvia-chan's room at the Fairy Hills, and Juvia-chan will show you some of Juvia-chan's new pillows." Juvia's eyes gleamed.

"Oh…" Natsu frowned. That sounded boring. It was something Natsu wasn't really interested in, but Juvia was so nice. He could at least do this for her. "I don't know if that's the most fun thing we could do, but if it makes you happy…"

"Don't worry, Natsu-sama! Juvia-chan is certain that you won't be bored." Juvia smiled.

Everyone who could hear this was grumbling to themselves. Aparantly, the clueless dragon slayer was going to have a moonlight picnic and then go back to Juvia's solitary room with a large bed and thick walls…just to see pillows…Yeah right.

It was then that a unanimous thought went through the guild hall. 'Lucky SOB…'

Well…everyone except Grey for some odd reason…

(#3: Mirajane)

"So…How did your date go last night?" Lucy asked as she saw her teammate sit down across from her.

"Surprisingly good…" Natsu yawned.

"What's got you so tired, matchstick." Grey questioned.

"Well…Mirajane can be a bit of a slave driver." Natsu sighed. "When I first took her out, she wanted to go eat."

"That doesn't sound bad." Lucy smiled.

"But it was at this super fancy resteraunt, and I had to wear a suit and tie. Then, they made me comb my hair, and then I was covered in this stupid cologne to cover my smell…" Natsu grumbled.

"I don't blame them." Grey commented. "Usually, you smell like a dead cow."

"Can it, stripper…" Natsu began, but then collapsed to the table. "Oh, whatever, I'm too tired to argue."

"From a simple dinner?"

"Naw, the food was good, even if the music and building sucked ass." Natsu groaned. "It was what came after that."

"Oh?"

"Mirjane dragged me dancing." Natsu complained. "I hated it. Why dance when we could fight? But whenever I asked that, Mira would purposely step on my toes."

"As you deserve." Grey smirked. He was taking advantage of his rival's momentary fatigue.

"So, we did that until the place closed." Natsu continued. "But she wasn't done there. Mira then dragged me up into the hills, and we talked for hours."

"Oh, no wonder you were tied." Lucy nodded in understanding. "You must have been up for half the night."

"Nope. All night." Natsu stated.

"Oh! That's so romantic! You talked all night?" Lucy gushed.

"Nope. After we finished talking, she said she wanted coffee."

"Eh?"

"So we went back to my house even though I don't have any coffee."

"Eh?!"

"And then she threw me to the bed and had her way with me."

"EH!?"

Grey chocked on his drink. "Gack! Gah! Ack! You've got to be kidding me?!"

"Nope." Natsu groaned. "Did not get one wink of sleep. It was really weird too. Mira brought out these handcuffs and whips. I was really freaking out at first, but then things started feeling really REALLY good."

"Please stop talking…" Lucy whimpered.

"What? You're the one that asked why I was so tired." Natsu shrugged.

"Wait…What about Happy?" Grey questioned.

"Mira threw him out with a pile of fish. Haven't seen him since." Natsu groaned. "Now shut up. I'm trying to sleep…"

"Good morning, Natsu-kun!" Mira cheered as she waked up behind the dragon slayer.

Natsu looked up. "Oh…Good morning, Mira-chan."

"Last night was so great!" Mira had a huge smile on her face. "We should have another date tonight."

"Oh…Okay. I just need a nap…and maybe an energy drink…" Natsu noted.

"Great! Come up to the counter later after your nap and we can talk." Mira leaned in and whispered in his ear. "Elfman's gone on a request, so he'll be gon ALL night. So we can go to my house tonight."

"Oh…Okay…" Natsu stared off into space. There was no telling what Mira might have at her house…

"See you soon!" Mira cheered as she walked up to the bar and begin her work.

"…Was she glowing?" Lucy blinked.

"Yep." Grey frowned and looked away.

"Oh…" Lucy looked over to the now sleeping dragon slayer.

It just occurred to her that she might have missed out…

"Oh, it's a great day to be alive~" Mira sang as she worked. Her voice was cheery, her skin was glowing, and there was a bounce in her step.

Okay, she definitely missed out.

"But…but it wasn't like anyone could have predicted this would have happened." Lucy mumbled to herself. "I mean, Natsu and Mirajane? Who would even think about that?"

Apparantly, I would think about that. At least from a humorous perspective.

Why did I choose Natsu? Because paring people with him is completely hilarious. In fact, I might do a second part to this with other girls.

Thank you all for reading and please remember to…

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