Chapter Sixteen-Werewolves of London

Cold.

It was cold. Cold and wet. Remus was aware of the cold and the overwhelming smell of filth and rotting garbage around him before he even opened his eyes.

With a groan he opened them.

It was dark. Very dark. What looked like a small fire nearby was casting dim flickering shadows on the cement walls and dripping ceiling.

He slowly lifted his head and felt his heart shop short.

In the shadows all around him was a ring of wild and filthy people- no, not people, werewolves. Their eyes were narrowed in suspicion, distrust, hatred and (Remus felt another thrill of terror) unmistakable hunger.

He was alive though. But before he could say or do anything, before he could even think of what to do-

"Be careful what you say wizard…your life is in our hands now."

He sat up and turned to face the speaker.

A tall, lanky man was standing there- his clothes were ripped and torn from apparent negligence and rough living. His long, filthy hair was dark and hung about his pale, bony face in greasy strands. His eyes were the same colour as grey slate and just as cold. And in his long fingered hands, he was absentmindedly twirling Remus's wand.

Remus cleared his throat. "I need to speak to Fenrir Greyback."

The cold, dark eyes narrowed. "How do you know him?"

"We've met before." Remus said darkly.

There was murmuring from around the circle that was abruptly cut short when the werewolf with Remus's wand gave them a stern look.

"What is your name, wizard?"

"Let me speak to him."

"I asked you what your name is, wizard!"

"Let me speak to Fenrir Greyback."

A low snarl from the man in front of him. "I don't think you're aware that I'm the one conducting the conversation here- I will not ask you again- WHAT IS YOUR NAME?"

Remus stared up into the cold grey eyes above him. For some bizarre reason he felt no trace of fear- just odd, almost disturbing- detachment from what was quickly unfolding around him.

If you can fool people into believing your one of those that wears their hearts on their sleeve, you can hide a lot of your true intentions.

Who had said that to him? Someone had.

"What is your name?"

Fooling people…hiding your true intentions…Suddenly with a sharp jolt of realization he remembered who had told him that- Sirius, back during the first Order- shortly before I stopped trusting him and believed he was the traitor-

"My name is Remus Lupin. I wish to speak to Fenrir Greyback."

The man's eyes were slits now- "Lupin?" he said coldly. "Sounds familiar-"

"It should." Remus said grimly. "My name gets around quite a bit. May I please speak to Fenrir? It's very important."

"Shut it." The werewolf said, as he continued to twist Remus's wand in his hands- eyeing him shrewdly.

Remus frowned. "Fenrir Greyback is the leader of this pack is he not?"

"I should think so." Came a drawling voice from behind him.

Remus spun around and saw the circle of werewolves parting back respectfully, as a tall grey haired man stepped forward, his pointed teeth bared in a grin as he stared at Remus. At the sight of him, an unexpected surge of hatred had risen within him, like a fiery bile. It was taking more than a little effort to control his breathing and detached expression.

The other werewolf inclined his head respectfully at Fenrir's approach and Fenrir's eyes flickered to him for the merest fraction of a second.

"Manners Randolph, we have a guest- a little late for dinner obviously…but perhaps dessert."

There were a scattering of soft laughter from around the ring of onlookers.

"What's your name you said?" Fenrir asked him peering at him closely.

"Remus Lupin." He said in the calmest voice he could manage.

Fenrir looked taken aback. "Lupin?" he rasped. He drew closer to him in the dim light and Remus forced himself not to gag from the foul mixture of sweat, blood and dirt that was issuing from the man in front of him.

Fenrir's eyes stared hard at his face for a moment before a satisfied smile spread across his face. He reached out suddenly and grabbed hold of Remus's arm in a viselike grip and pulling it towards him, wrenched up his sleeve.

His scar… Fenrir stared at it with a triumphant gaze as the onlookers burst into furious whispers- Randolph, the werewolf that had Remus's wand was staring at him with a mixture of surprise and suspicion.

Fenrir pressed a yellowing, sharp nailed finger to his arm and Remus felt an unexpected searing pain where his scar was. He let out a loud yell and pulled back but Fenrir didn't seem too bothered by it.

What the HELL was that about? Remus thought desperately. For the first time that night, he felt numb with fear. He was as terrified as he had been that time so many years so long ago when he had seen narrowed, golden eyes and long pointed teeth through the trees of his local childhood woods.

His old scar was still tingling; throbbing as if had been burned. He knew that as odd as it was- it probably did not bode well.

"I marked you as one of mine years ago." Fenrir smiled. "They say old wounds know their masters, wouldn't you agree Lupin?"

He said nothing, staring into those wicked eyes, determined not to show any emotion.

Fenrir released him and stood up to stride over to Randolph. "How did you find him?"

"He was following me and Lyall on our way down here. I backtracked, knocked him unconscious and we dragged him back here for questioning."

Fenrir took the wand from Randolph who handed it over rather reluctantly.

"The true mark of a wizard…his wand." Fenrir said quietly. Everyone in the circle was eyeing them with utter reverence and fascination. Fenrir began to pace quietly around the ring of the circle, his brow furrowed.

Remus sat there wondering what on earth was coming next when Fenrir turned around, his face half-covered in the shadows, "You know something Lupin…you don't even have to tell me why you're down here-I think you're a spy."

He just barely managed to hide his true feelings under a mask of controlled surprise.

"What?"

"A spy." Fenrir snarled. "Don't think I haven't seen this before."

"And who would I be a spy for?" Remus laughed bitterly. "A wizard? The Ministry?"

"Albus Dumbledore! That's who! The man you worked for a year for- like a HUMAN."

Damn. They knew about that. Probably was better to get everything out of the way in the beginning rather than later though…not that that really helped his situation at present-

"I regret to say that though I worked alongside humans for a few months at Hogwarts, I was never treated as a friend."

Fenrir circled Remus with a more than suspicious look. "From what I've heard- the last time the Dark Lord came to power you were too busy caught up with your friends to help us."

"You're wrong there." Remus said much more calmly than he felt.

"Is that so?" Fenrir sneered.

"Three of them died, two of them by the Dark Lord's hand himself. The other was sent to Azkaban for life. Do you think that I did not have a hand behind all this?" Remus asked pointedly.

Fenrir looked surprised. "Well…" he said slowly. "It seems that I misunderestimated you Remus Lupin."

Remus gave a genuine smile. "Most people do."

"So why betray your friends?"

God forgive me. "Friends?" Remus smiled grimly. "They weren't my friends! People that leave you out of their circles of trust and treat you like a lesser creature because of your condition are people that I do not see as friends, though-" he added as if he were confessing something personal. "It took me awhile to realize that of course."

"And Albus Dumbledore? Who took you into that school as a boy, who gave you a JOB?" Fenrir sneered.

"He allowed me into school yes and I confess as a child I obeyed the strict, unyielding guidelines they had said up for me in my case so that I could attend. When I was younger I did try to fight and seek an escape from what I truly was- but then I grew older and I had lapses where I fought with myself on my childhood dream of being a wizard and admitting to what I really was. I took the job because I saw it as a chance to be a wizard again and forget my condition- when my condition was revealed- Albus Dumbledore forced me to leave the school rather than keep me. It would have been bad publicity for our kind to be publicly acknowledged there." He managed to create a convincing tone of disgust in his voice.

"Ha. I knew it." Fenrir said, his eyes narrowed at the mention of Dumbledore. "Trust the old man to shove aside bad deeds from his name and put the blame on others- wouldn't have been the first time."

Remus said nothing, watching Fenrir intently.

"How did you know we were here?" Fenrir said finally.

"It wasn't easy- it took me several months of research and listening to reports from up and around the country...reports of werewolf attacks, word of mouth." He felt inwardly relieved that they were on slightly less shaky ground here.

"And so you sought to find me-"

"Yes. It took me awhile as I said earlier but at that point I knew I had to stop running from what I truly was. And so I knew if there was one werewolf in England I could go to for advice and for guidance it would be you."

"Very flattering, Lupin." Fenrir growled. "But I'm afraid that its going to take more convincing on your part-"

Remus felt his throat go dry, he had been afraid of this. He bowed his head respectfully. "I can assure you that my intentions are honourable-" Well in a way they are, their very honourable, just not for him or wherever he's concerned.

Fenrir smiled and it was so cold it sent shivers down Remus's spine.

"I'm afraid- that I need proof. And not anything that you can offer."

Remus knew what he was going to do the second he raised Remus's wand. And he knew there would be nothing he could do that would ever prepare him for it-

He barely noticed the other werewolves faces, save Randolph who was eyeing the situation before him with an almost hungry expression.

"CRUCIO!"

He had tried to brace himself, but once he was hit with the unforgivable curse which felt like a millions of red hot knifes piercing him- he fell to the floor writhing and twisting in agony. It seemed to last ages-it didn't stop- just mounting pain that was attacking him all over. He didn't scream though- he wouldn't scream for Fenrir's satisfaction.

Suddenly he found himself facedown on the floor- his breath was coming in searing gasps. Though the curse had been lifted- waves of pain still racked his body. Over the sound of his anguished gasps he could hear Fenrir's drawling voice, almost bored sounding-"Tell the truth Lupin-"

"I….am…" Remus gasped. He felt his stomach churn violently and before he could stop himself, he vomited all over the concrete floor.

Fenrir seemed quite unperturbed. He shrugged. "Damn. How unfortunate." And he raised the wand again.

This time it was far worse. And it seemed to last much longer. He was on the verge of screaming- it was taking all of his willpower and effort not to. He grit his teeth as his body was wracked with pain, shaking uncontrollably. His muscles were seizing up as he thrashed about on the floor in torture. His consciousness was fading-

The spell lifted again-he lifted his head and squinted through his blurred vision to see Fenrir talking quietly with Randolph for a moment before turning back to him.

"Now Lupin- answer me. Are you a spy for Dumbledore?"

Remus could only gasp for breath and shake his pounding head in response.

"This could go on quite awhile you know- you're actually putting up an admirable fight here, but it would be much easier for all of us if you just told the truth."

He moaned. He couldn't help it- he was in so much pain, he had actually screwed up his eyes as if it would help block it out. His consciousness was coming to him in waves rather than a steady flow-

Can't… can't…can't surrender-

Golden eyes through the trees-

Please stop…

A snarling noise as the wolf lunged at him, teeth bared-

Please don't- please…

The same bared smile, with pointed teeth-

Can't….can't…

The wand went slashing through the air again.

He wanted to die. He wanted this to end.

The pain was unendurable- what he went through at every full moon actually- but there would be no end to this…this agony. He had already gone past the point where it was impossible to pass out. The pain seemed to be responsible for keeping him alive- because it felt like he should be long dead at this point. If someone had offered him a first class ticket to hell, Remus would have seized it immediately because NOTHING could be worse then what he was going through now-

The pain had been overwhelming, every fiber and cell in his body being pierced on all sides with white hot razor sharp knives for what seemed like an excruciating eternity.

But now the pain was replaced by a constant, blinding agony, everything was white- his eyes must have rolled up in his head long ago, his ribcage felt as if it were collapsing upon his own lungs- he couldn't breathe anymore, but he was also still screaming at the same time. He had given up trying not to scream, ages ago.

Nothing was connected to him anymore- his legs, his arms, his brain- it was all oddly disconnected- he was fading in and out of white consciousness- and then through the blinding white haze he saw other strange flashes of light that were beyond him at this point to recognize what colour-

And then quite suddenly- he knew for some strange reason, that despite the lasting pain, overwhelming pain- the curse had stopped.

And he heard laughter. It was a weak, barely distinguishable sound but it was defiantly laughter….Laughter coming from his own mouth.

He couldn't see- the white light was slowly fading back to the dark surroundings but he could feel tears steaming down his face from the terrible pain. Yet he was laughing fit to burst- laughing like Sirius as he was lead off to Azkaban- and before he fell through the veil-

Through his own thick veil of pain he saw the unnerved faces of the other werewolves staring down at him and he spat out the salty blood that had somehow filled in his mouth; out onto the floor so that he could laugh all the more harder. His face was wet with tears, and the pain hurt so bad he could barely lift his head from the cold ground, but still he kept laughing.

Fenrir Greyback stepped forward looking down at him with a mixture of confusion and astonishment. He probably thought he had tortured Remus into insanity- perhaps he had.

"Lupin? LUPIN!"

But still Remus continued to laugh-he felt Fenrir seize the front of his jumper and pull him to his feet- but his limbs were unable to support him. He would have collapsed were it not for Fenrir's tight grip.

Fenrir's blurred face was floating in front of him, his expression unreadable despite the strange smile on his face-

"Welcome to the pack."

And then he released him, and Remus felt himself finally falling not only to the floor, but into sweet merciful black oblivion.

Remus opened his eyes and found himself staring at a dark, half-caved in concrete ceiling. He groaned. This was as bad as waking up from a transformation-no, a hundred times worse- god, it was painful. He turned his head to see a small cleared out space with walls of rubbish and garbage. In the middle, was a small fire and sitting across from it was a young tattooed man with bloodshot eyes who was sitting on what looked like a mouldy blanket, eyeing him suspiciously.

"What's going on?" His voice was much hoarser than usual from all the screaming he could not entirely remember doing. He sat up, aching all over, limbs still trembling uncontrollably.

"You've been sleeping. They threw you here with me. Everyone new to the pack is assigned to a certain spot to stay. We have to share this section."

Remus noted the boys disgust in his voice and avoided collapsing back onto the ground with exhaustion. He was freezing, his skull was throbbing and he felt like he was going to be sick.

The boy was still watching him intently. "Hey," he said slowly. "Haven't I met you before?"

Remus looked at the pale, filthy boy for a moment and a note of recognition hit him. "I think so. You stopped me in the street once. You were looking for a place to eat."

The boy slapped the side of his head with his tattooed palm. " 'Cor!" he exclaimed. "That's right! And you're a werewolf!"

"Yes." Remus said, slightly amused by the boys reaction.

He let out a cold laugh. "Man. Guess that's irony, isn't it?"

"What?"

"I hadn't been bitten yet. You were the werewolf."

Remus stared at him nonplussed, wondering if the boy was mad.

The boy rolled his eyes. "Werewolves of London, old man! Jesus Christ, even I've heard that song!"

Remus felt a sharp pain stab at his heart as he remembered a certain pink-haired witch singing the drunken rendition of the song for him at Christmas. "I've only heard it a few times."

"There's that line in it-" the boy yawned. "'I saw a werewolf with a Chinese menu in his hand, walking through the streets of Soho in the rain. He was looking for a place called Lee Ho Fook's…'"

"Oh." said Remus.

The boy fiddled with one of the many piercings going through his eyebrow. "Huh. I didn't even think about that. And just a few weeks after that I became a werewolf myself."

"Who bit you?"

"Randolph." Said the boy carelessly. "It was an accident. I don't think he expected me to live. But here I am with you lot…the real 'Werewolves of London'."

"Are you a muggle?"

The boy rubbed his dirty nose with a gloved hand and glared at him. "I don't see what bloody business that is of yours old man."

"Sorry." Said Remus. "I didn't mean to get off to such a bad start. My name's Remus Lupin." He said standing up with great effort and extending his hand.

The boy looked at it and sneered. "I'm not touching you, you pervert."

Brillant. Remus thought warily. Already off to a great start. He let his hand fall not bothering to tell the boy that shaking hands was considered by most people a form of common courtesy.

"I'm Michel Jaques." The boy said.

He was surprised and slightly curious. "That's a French name."

"So what!?!?!" Michel said angrily.

Remus frowned slightly and mentally backed away from this obviously dangerous territory.

"Christ." Michel hissed, suddenly flipping out a switchblade. Remus immediately took a step backwards but relaxed somewhat when he saw Michel was just using it to trim his ragged fingernails. He looked up, noticed Remus standing a good ways away from him and grinned.

"I'm not going to knife you old man. You aren't worth my time."

In Remus's opinion the boy was trying to sound a lot tougher than he really was but he said nothing about that and instead approached him cautiously.

Michel glanced at him and eyed him thoughtfully. "So how did you become a werewolf?"

"I was bitten as a child."

"And Fenrir bit you?"

"That's correct."

"Why didn't you join him right away?"

Remus was ready for this. "I was only a little boy."

"But what about your parents?"

"They raised me."

Michel's eyes widened. "And you being a werewolf!?!? Were they fuckin CRAZY?!?!'

"No." said Remus quietly. "They loved me."

Michel looked taken aback by his answer. There was a long and awkward silence between them. Remus turned away and went about setting up his new living space as best he could in his corner.

Finally after a little while, Michel spoke up- "Well I think they were crazy- and you're crazy too. Christ, you were laughing on the floor fit to burst when Fenrir was torturing you- why the fuck were you laughing?"

Remus smiled, though it hurt the muscles in his face to do so. "As you already noted earlier, 'I'm crazy'."

Michel raised his eyebrows. "Yeah…I guess you really are then."