-sneaks out to introduce the fic hidden behind a giant statue of Danny- You may be a bit upset with me and my procrastionation, but I'm safe back here, right? You wouldn't DARE hurt the ghost-boy, right? Anyway...Sorry about taking forever to update. Stuff. Just. Stuff. If you must know the truth, I recently got my BFF Draiky The Great obsessed with a childhood love of mine, Sonic the Hedgehog games, which also re-ignited my own obsession, so I've been busy with other things. But don't worry, I'm still as much of a Phantom-Phreak as the next girl! I'll be in Flordia pwning Nick Studios once they take off DP, YOU CAN BE ASSURED OF THAT! But until then, I've just got a bunch of other fanfics in the works, so excuse the slow updates. PLEASE put me on your author alert or something though, I've got a bunch of new fanfics about to be posted! -In other words, don't get your hopes up...-
BUT TO THE FANFICTION! ...Wait...Nope, reviews first!
dannyphantomsgf - My Windows doesn't even WORK anymore! -crap piece of...- Luckily, in April, my parents are getting a new computer, and the good one we're using now gets put into my room! And yes - the second DP goes off the air, Nickelodeon Studios will be superiorly OWNED. Did you hear the last episode's going up on Valentine's Day? DANNY AND SAM ARE GONNA HOOK UP AND THEN IT'S OVER!
DarkDragon X13 - The DxV pairings need to DIE. Seriously. They need to die and burn in a horrible, styrofoam-pollution-caused heckhole. Though I do sympathize with the mashed potatoes. BELIEVE IT! -not a Naruto fan, but watches a bit too much X-Play...-
coolgirlc - Ooh, Bartender's a good idea! But are we allowed to let Danny, Sam, and Tucker near the alcohol?...Ah, who really cares! I'll play with that a bit, thanks!
DxS Phreak - Ooh! NICE THREAT! -awards cookies- Okay, it's on! Free cookies for whoever makes up shweet and totally original update threats!
passing4insane - I already had some plans for Let's Make A Date, but those aren't too bad! Let me play with those a bit, thanks!
Jack Phantom - D00d! LITERACY! -coddles the review- Not to offend any of my other reviewers, but it puts a warm fuzzy in my heart when I see really long, literate reviews. (Anyone who's ever gotten a review from me knows - I ALWAYS leave long, annoying reviews.) I might have to use some of these ideas to prolong the story, MUCHO THANKS!! -coddles the reviewer-
White Rose Kitsune - Ola, Kitsune! Yes, it's been a while...-is a horrid procrastinator- Sorry to hear about BotB...But if you ever get it re-typed, I'm still interested in the story!
random random whistle - Hm, sounds interesting! Thanks for the idea!
Ooh! And thanks so much for the birthday love, guys! EVERYONE WHO WISHED ME A HAPPY BIRTHDAY GETS FREE ICE-CREAM! -Even though my birthday has long past, I still have to show love for my fans!-
Free ice-cream for: Fallen Oblivion Angel, Draiky the Great, atlantiandragoness, Tannenbaum Bell, Centaurgurl08, dannyphantomsgf, epobbp, BlackShadow875, and coolgirlc!
AND NOW...YOUR FEATURE PRESENTATION...
"And welcome back to Whose Line is it Anyway?" Drew said with a wide smile on his face...and a bazooka pointed at the back of his head by a very irritated authoress. "Look at how fast chapter 8 went up! It's A-MAZING! One THOUSAND points to the authoress!" The authoress, who felt pleased with her work, waved a 'many thankies' over to atlantiandragoness (supplier of the bazooka), then sat back down.
"Drew, we suggest you move away from the desk and get a lead wall." Brad suggested.
"Never! My desk...my precious..." Drew hissed, petting his desk.
"Oh, God, please say we're not doing a Lord of the Rings parody." Ryan said.
"Nope!" Drew said, bouncing back to his normal self. "Ryan, Colin, and Wayne are gonna play Improbable Mission!" Wayne walked over to the sideline, and Ryan and Colin took center stage. "Okay, someone in the audience give me something you would find on a Danny Phantom character's 'to-do' list."
"Change the ecto-filtrator!" "Shave back hair!" "Ask Danny out!" "Buy a new PDA!"
"Ooh! I heard someone say 'buy a cat'!" Drew chose. The fangirls laughed and applauded as Vlad shot a dagger-glare at the dead fangirl who said that. "Okay, so in this game, Ryan and Colin are secret agents, and Wayne is going to give them their mission, which is buying a cat. Whenever you guys are ready, go for it..." Drew looked back at the very disgruntled Vlad. "And good luck."
"Colin, lookit!" Ryan said excitedly, pretending to hold a small box-shaped item. "We got a message!"
"Why do you think the cassette's all green and gold?" Colin asked. Ryan merely shrugged before putting the 'cassette' in the 'tape player' and pressing play.
"So you wanna meet sexy Latin-American babes?" Wayne, as the tape recorder, said. Danny and Tucker, not caring they weren't supposed to participate, ran on-stage, snatched the tape, and ran back to their seats.
"Wait, this one is the tape with the mission!" Ryan said, putting a new cassette in the imaginary tape player.
"Hello, operatives."
"Hi, boss."
"Did you already listen to the Latin-American babes tape?"
"It got stolen."
"That's too bad. But beyond the point. This is the problem - uh..." Wayne looked over at Vlad, who was giving him a very serious 'watch it' look, while Danny was right next to the multi-billionaire, cheering Wayne to go for it. "The prime minister of Packerfanaticastan, Dalv Sretsam, is supposed to come over and meet with the President of the U.S. today. However, he is in a state of extreme depression. The royal cat of Packerfanaticastan has been viciously murdered!"
"Gasp!" Ryan said.
"It must have been the Prime Minister's arch-rival - Ynnad Notef, King of Goingghostatonia!" Colin accused determinedly.
"That's exactly right, Agent Colin - Ynnad Notef is in Packerfanaticastan right now, facing charges for kitty-assault. But we're off-topic again. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to go to the pet store and buy a new royal cat before the President cancels his meeting with Prime Minister Sretsam. The future of the United States' supply of cheese depends on it. Good luck, agents."
Colin and Ryan stood in silence, watching the 'tape player' before Colin finally said, "Huh. That's strange. Usually, these tapes always--"
"BOOM!"
"Spoke too soon." Ryan pointed out.
"Well, let's get to it!" The dynamic duo of improv shook hands, causing dramatic 'Mission: Impossible'-esque music to play.
"Okay, which way's the pet-store?" Ryan asked to kick it off.
"Uh..." Colin looked about frantically, then pointed in a random direction. "That way!" Quickly, they ran over to 'that way', then stopped after only going a few feet. "Good thing we live really close to the pet-store!"
Ryan attempted to open the door. "Damn, it's locked!" He pretended to read a sign hanging on the door. "Out to lunch. Of course! Now what do we do?"
"Hm..." The actors began looking about for a way in, when Ryan stopped and snapped his fingers. "Wait, I've got it! The metal plate in your head!"
"What?!"
"Didn't you get a metal plate attached to the inside of your skull after that incident in Aruba? We'll use that as a battering ram to break down the door!" With a frustrated sigh, Colin allowed Ryan to pick him up and pretend to ram his head through the door.
"Ow..." the Canadian said afterwards, rubbing his sensitive, bald head. "Okay, we're in." They began to look about. "Oh, noes! There aren't any cats here!"
"Well, we'll just have to...make them come out somehow!"
"I have it! We'll dress you up in a salmon-suit, then cover you with fish-perfume and lure the cats out of hiding!"
"Do we have to?"
"DO IT!" Upon command, Ryan pretended to slip on a salmon-suit, spray on the fish-essence, then laid down on the ground and began flailing on the floor like an idiot. "It's working!"
"Okay, we've got one!" Ryan said with a laugh, getting up off the floor, grabbing one of the cats, and cracking his sore back. "Quick, we've got to get this back to the...whoever's coming over to see the President!"
They went to run back to the sitting area, when Colin stopped them. "Wait!"
"Oh, what now?"
"What do we name it?"
The two took a second to think. "Let's name it Baby Drew." Ryan suggested. The actors started cooing and cuddling over the imaginary cat, but Drew buzzed them out before THAT joke could get out of hand.
"Yeah, yeah, yeah - thousand points." he said, hammering on the buzzer, even though the game was over.
"We love you, Drew!" Ryan and Colin said cutely.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
"Oh, my God! Grab the video-cameras and set your TiVo's!" Drew exclaimed once he saw the next card. "Danny, Sam, Tucker, and Vlad are gonna play HOEDOWN!!" The crowd burst into the loudest cheers of the night as Tucker, Vlad, Danny, and Sam lined up center-stage (in that order). "Someone in the audience, give me a topic for these guys to sing a hoe-down about!"
"Halfas!" "Cats!" "Jack Fenton!" "Maddie's married!" "VLAD'S OLD AND LONELY!!"
"What did I do to deserve the hate?" Vlad asked humiliatedly.
"Okay, to give Vlad a BIT of his dignitiy, let's go with something simple - the villan hoedown! Laura, whenever you're ready, take it away!"
Laura, being the musical mastermind of the show, started playing a bouncy square-dance-like song, and the audience started clapping in-time. Tucker opened his mouth to sing the first verse, when...
"Idee-didee-didee-didee!" Vlad randomly burst out, pretending to swing a cup. Obviously, the entire building exploded in laughter. "Didee...didee...We didn't get to the funny part yet..."
"Wrong song, cheese-head!" Sam informed him, as everyone else was too doubled-up in laughter to correct him. Even Laura had completely stopped playing, just to give the improvers some time to regroup.
"Let's go on to a game called hoedown!" Drew said once the crowd settled down. "Danny, Sam, Tucker, and Vlad - you guys are doing the villan hoedown! HOEDOWN!"
"SOR-RY!" Vlad snapped as the music and rhythmic clapping started once again.
"Thanks, Vlad, the one I had wasn't that funny!" Tucker said. He waited for the end of the musical phrase, then came in singing. "Ember is my favorite villan, that girl is smoking hot! She's a real great singer, I like her music a lot! But what is it about her, that makes this girl so fine? Well, unlike Vlad, she actually watches Whose Line!"
"Ha, ha - very clever." Vlad scowled as he waited for his musical cue to come in. Once it was officially his turn, he started singing his verse. "Yes, I am a villan! I'm evil and I'm proud! I pick on all the heroes, I'm obnoxious and I'm loud! Why do I love my job so much, why do I cherish it so?" Rather than singing the final part of the verse, he turned to Tucker and began mercilessly kicking the defenseless techno-geek until he was forced to crawl under Drew's desk in pain.
"Vlad, that wasn't nice!" Danny scolded.
"So?"
Another huge fight-scene probably would have broken out, but it was Danny's turn, so the younger halfa simply ignored his elder and started singing his own verse. "Vladdie's a respectable villan - he really knows how to fight. He's wise and tough and actually pretty bright. Why doesn't he like me very much? Why does he think I'm such a brat? 'Cause I love to tell him 'quit calling my mom - get out and buy a CAT!!"
"Okay, the cat joke's getting old, Daniel." Vlad said with a snarl.
Then came Sam's turn, and - being opposed to violence as she is, as well as not wanting to envoke the wrath of Vlad - the goth-girl decided to take a different path with the final verse. "You can keep all those common villans, I have my evil man! He's from the future! You know, that one named Dan? Is it his awesome power? Is it his muscular shape? No, it's because all girls really dig the cape!!"
"They really dig the cape!!" the three improvers not hiding under Drew's desk in the moment chorused before Drew buzzed them out (and threw Tucker back onto center-stage). Once they got the buzzer, the 4 actors all returned to their seats.
"Alright, thousand points to everyone! Stick around, we'll be right back after a commercial break!!"
MUAHAHAHAHA!! PH3AR TEH POWER OF MEH 1337 UPDATE-N3$$!!!
...What? I had nothing else to put down here, okay?
§ -Tucker's Mayflower, going ghost!!- §