"When's Aunt Jenny going to be here?"
With a deep breath, one he held and then released very slowly, he attempted to snap her ponytail in place. To his chagrin, the finished product was no better than the last three attempts he'd made as he was still staring at a whole slew of bumps. Nearly ready to throw his hands up and quit, he hung his head.
"I don't know, sweetheart. Soon."
Lifting a hand to rub at his eyes, which he knew to be puffy and red due to his lack of sleep, he prayed for Jenny's arrival.
"Did you mess it up again?"
The knowing tone to her voice had him rolling his eyes as he pulled the ponytail from her hair, allowing the silky locks to fall every which way. "No."
Bella turned to him, her eyes narrowed as she scrutinized him. "Yes, you did."
"I'm doing the best I can," he muttered while nodding for her to return to her previous position. "Now, let's try again."
"Can't I just wake mommy up?"
"Nope," he quickly replied, absolutely no hesitation on his part. "We're letting her rest."
And he hoped she rested all day; all day and all night and maybe even into the next day.
Bella made a dissatisfied grunt as she turned around. "You're so stubborn, daddy."
Flabbergasted, he sat back in the swing and stared at the back of her head. "I'm stubborn? What about you?"
"I'm stubborn because of you." She crossed her arms. "It's all your fault."
"All my-"
"Good morning."
Interrupted mid outburst, he tore his eyes from Bella to find Katrina emerging through the front door, her hair pulled over one shoulder and a sleepy smile on her face. However, it was the grey sweats she wore that seemed entirely out of place on her. Too bad it did nothing to dull her beauty. For that, he was not grateful.
"Thank heavens," Bella groaned while pointing at him over her shoulder. "Daddy's horrible at ponytails. We've been here forever!"
The exaggeration on Bella's part rubbed his annoyance regarding this particular interaction even deeper.
"Is he?" Katrina playfully raised her eyebrows at Bella, but never once looked at him. "Well, isn't that a shame?"
Rolling his eyes, he held out the ponytail for her to take as she walked past him and took a seat next to him on the porch swing. Just the heat from her body was enough to make him feel out of sorts. He didn't know whether to lean into her warmth, or do everything he could to escape it. The latter was likely the better option, yet here he sat, not moving in the least.
"Come here, love. Let's show your father how it's done."
As Bella swiftly bounced from his lap to Katrina's, he cast her a sour expression. "You're a little traitor. I'll remember this."
While Bella only giggled and sat straighter, Katrina took to pulling her long hair together.
"You certainly have thick enough hair," Katrina said as she ran her fingers through the silky locks.
"Like yours, mommy?"
Katrina smiled as she answered, "I think both your father and I contributed to this."
Contrary to his words the night before regarding her wishes of him, he reached out and brushed Katrina's hair over her ear. "Some more than others."
The smile that lit her face was incomparable. It wasn't bright or soft. It was knowing. It was gratefulness. It was all he wanted to see and feared to acknowledge. Why he did such things to himself was lost on him. Perhaps, he was a glutton for punishment. After he'd settled on the sofa the night before, all he'd been able to focus on was the fact that they'd still be making love if his phone hadn't rang. They'd be tangled around one another, completely falling into their joining; completely oblivious to all else but the pleasures they'd longed for too many years past now. The worst part was that he'd returned to the room and watched her sleep for the better part of an hour, wanting more than anything to wake her up and tell her he could do the things she'd asked of him.
It was true what she'd said about him not giving her a fair chance. All this time, he'd been waiting for the other shoe to drop and not even bothering to hide it. Never in his mind had he just trusted her word. Then again, what real reason did he have to trust her other than the fact that she hadn't already murdered him and taken Bella?
"All done," Katrina proclaimed as she let Bella's hair go, the ponytail remaining perfectly in place with nary a bump in sight.
Not a moment later, Bella jumped up and skipped over to the window where she began hopping about and taking in her reflection.
"It's perfect!" She turned to Katrina with a beaming expression. "Thanks, mommy!"
"You're very welcome."
With a giggle, Bella waved at them and darted toward the door. "I'm going to brush my teeth!"
Katrina's smile followed her right through the door. "What's she so excited about this morning?"
"Jenny's taking her to the zoo."
"Oh." Katrina turned to face him, her smile somewhat dimming. "So, it's just you and I on this lovely Sunday, then?"
He regarded her even tone with a bit of wariness, something that must have crossed his face as she was soon leaning to kiss his cheek and afterward lingering a little too close to him for his comfort. Maybe it was her way of saying they were alright, but it really didn't matter. When she did such things, it often left him without his willpower. It was because of that very reason he hadn't awoken her the night before. Now, more than ever, he needed to keep a clear head.
"I suppose so," he answered as he sat straighter in an attempt to put some distance between them.
At his movement, she nodded and sat back, allowing them to gently sway back and forth. "I know what I want to do today."
"And what's that?" he absentmindedly asked as he concentrated on how much space he could put between them without her noticing.
She tilted her head toward the porch steps. "Your flower beds along the porch skirting could use some love and attention."
Brow knitting as he followed her gaze, he said, "I don't have any flower beds."
"Oh?" Her smile spread as she tilted her head. "Silly me. I must have looked upon that sad excuse for a front yard and imagined it much brighter."
The chuckle bubbling in his throat couldn't be helped. "It's not the right time of year to garden."
"Oh? Is that so?" she asked, her eyebrow raised as she turned to face him, bringing a leg up to rest on the swing between them. "It would seem you in fact don't know everything. October is the time to plant an array of flowers."
Well, that was news to him. "And you intend to plant such flowers?"
"With Bella's help of course." She bit her lip. "As soon as you purchase them."
Women. There was always a catch. Last night, she'd been all but in tears over his lack of reciprocation to her wishes and today she acted as though it never happened. How was he supposed to follow those sorts of moods?
"You are the biggest handful I ever decided to acknowledge in my life."
"You love me anyway."
Mouth suddenly gone dry, he swallowed in an attempt to wet it. The way she so casually slipped that in there begged the question of if she'd been just waiting for an opening. He wouldn't be surprised. Katrina had always been one to seize opportunities when she saw them.
Thankfully, he was saved from having to reply by Jenny's truck pulling into the driveway. Quickly hopping up from the swing, he began fidgeting with his shirt in the hopes that it wasn't as clear to Katrina as he felt it was that he was steadily coming unwound. He swore that one more well placed touch from her would have him bursting from the seams.
"Am I going to be threatened again?" Katrina asked as she watched Jenny approach.
"If you are, I beg you to be the bigger person and not rise to temptation."
Which wasn't likely to happen, he thought, as Jenny ascended the porch steps.
"Morning, Crane's," she greeted as she nodded to them. "Where's Bels?"
"Teeth," he muttered, before clearing his throat. "She's brushing her teeth."
"Uh huh." Jenny's eyes ventured to Katrina, a mild interest emitting from her brown orbs. "I see you've found new accommodations."
Katrina leaned back in the swing and crossed her arms, her gaze leveled at Jenny with what seemed to be the utmost politeness. "No, I've simply found my way home."
A pause accompanied Katrina's words as Jenny stared at her through observant eyes. It was then that he decided Katrina hardly tended to help herself in these sorts of situations with her smart mouth. Sometimes, it came off as though she was just begging for a confrontation.
"Are the two of you going to be gone long?"
Jenny chuckled as she leaned against one of the posts, her entire countenance shifting to one of amusement. "Chill out, dad. I'll have her home by her curfew."
Rolling his eyes, he resumed his seat next to Katrina as she spoke, "Bella thinks a great deal of you."
More than a little shocked, he nervously cut his eyes to see Katrina and sighed in relief when he found her harboring a pleasant expression.
Jenny, on the other hand, raised an eyebrow. "I think a great deal of her."
"Thank you," Katrina went on while her gaze fell to her hands. "For everything you've done."
Heart hammering, he glanced up at Jenny, quite sure he was dreaming. Katrina had thanked one of the Mills sisters? And had seemed sincere? Surely, he was dreaming. However, as his eyes returned to Katrina, he found her breathing rather shallowly as she waited for Jenny's response, her fingers picking at the hem of her shirt. It was then that it dawned on him she was nervous. She was actually nervous. What in the hell was going on with her?
"I didn't do it for you," Jenny replied, her eyes narrowed. "I did it for him and I did it for Bella."
Katrina gave a small laugh as she lifted her head to Jenny with a thin smile. "Whatever the reason, I still thank you for all you've done for my family... and for me."
A pregnant pause lingered between the two women, one that had him as far on edge as he felt it possible to be.
"Everything I've done has been to help my family." Jenny crossed her arms as she stood straighter, her head tilting to the side. "Blood or not."
"Yes," he interrupted, nervous they'd start comparing who was the more treasured family member. "We're all family and better for it." Hoping that put an end to their chat, he turned to Katrina. "Will you please get her? She'll use the whole tube of toothpaste."
For the better part of a heartbeat, he thought she'd say no. Thankfully, that didn't happen.
"Of course." Her hand pressed down on his thigh as she pushed herself up. "I'll have her right out."
With that, she started for the door.
"She's pretty touchy with you." Jenny raised an eyebrow as the door closed. "You sure forgave her quick."
He bristled, the implications unnerving him. "Barely touching me is what constitutes forgiveness in your opinion?"
Jenny smirked as she nodded toward the swing. "From the way it looked when I drove up, she was practically in your lap."
A warmth came to his cheeks, making him pray he wasn't as red as he felt.
"My sister's pretty pissed with you, you know."
And just like that, a cold feeling swept through him, ridding him of his warm cheeks. Bracing himself for another argument, he defended, "It was your idea to let her out."
"No, no, no" Jenny argued with a shake of her head. "It was my idea to consult her about Bella. I never said anything about letting her out."
"You said to do whatever I had to in order to help my daughter." He gestured toward the door. "And I did."
Jenny smiled as she shifted against the post. "You've got balls, Crane. I'll give you that. I'm just telling you to keep them covered so my sister doesn't castrate you."
The thought worried him more than it should have. If there was one thing he and Abbie continually disagreed on, it was the subject of Katrina. Never before had they truly argued over anything else.
"If Katrina was planning to do something, she'd have done it by now. It's not as though she couldn't wipe us all away with little effort."
"Maybe she wants to gain your trust so she can tear your heart out again." Jenny looked him square in the eye. "Nothing's worse than thinking someone's changed, giving your heart to them, and then having the rug pulled out from under you."
He narrowed his eyes, sensing more to Jenny's words than she was letting on. "Are those your thoughts? Or Abbie's?"
She chuckled, leaving him more sure than ever that she was just the mouthpiece. "Does it matter? Katrina's the one with the reputation for being a manipulative, plotting murderer."
Sheer aggravation swept through him as he threw up his hands and asked, "Why does everyone keep saying she's a murderer? She's never murdered anyone."
"My bad," Jenny countered, holding up her hands. "Attempted murderer... against hundreds of people, including you, if you recall."
Having no reply, he sat there, heart pounding in his chest as all the air seeped out of him. Why couldn't he have one day without conflict? Just one?
"Aunt Jenny!" Bella shot out the door and vaulted into Jenny's arms, throwing her hands around her Aunt's neck with a squeal. "You're late, missy!"
The two of them together never failed to leave him questioning his sanity. Jenny had most definitely passed on her mischievousness to his daughter, something for which he was not grateful.
As they went back and forth, trading comments, he noticed Katrina leaning in the doorway, her eyes on Bella. She looked about as nervous as he felt.
"Ok, tell your mom and dad bye," Jenny said, pushing herself up and wiping off her jeans. "We've got a pretty good drive ahead of us."
Wasting no time, Bella darted over to Katrina and wrapped her arms around her waist, making Katrina smile as she bent over to kiss the top of Bella's head. "Bye, love. Have fun."
"Alright," he said as he slipped up behind Bella and lifted her up. "How about a personal escort to the car?"
"Ok!" She looked over her shoulder, her arms waving on either side of his neck. "Bye, mommy!"
There was a hint of discord in Katrina's eyes when they cut at him, but he did his best to ignore it for now. One thing at a time.
"Alright," he said as he reached down to retrieve Bella's backpack. "Let's get you buckled in."
As Jenny took the lead, he followed her down the steps, being careful to mind his footing.
"Where should you always be?"
"In Aunt Jenny's sight," Bella sighed as she pressed her head into his neck. "I won't run away again, daddy. I promise."
With a smile, he opened the back door and set her on the seat. "I know. I just want you to be safe, Bels."
Setting her backpack beside her, he reached over and buckled her in, making sure to avoid getting it too tight.
"What are you and mommy going to do?"
In truth, he hadn't considered the fact that he and Katrina would be alone before she'd brought it up earlier. Now, he was a tad worried about being so very alone with her.
"I'm not sure."
"Well, don't eat taco's without me," Bella warned with a pointed finger in his direction. "That would be rude, daddy."
The sassiness never ceased with this girl, he thought with a chuckle as he kissed her forehead. "I swear there shall be no taco's without you."
"Alright, let's get this party on the road." Jenny started the car and glanced back at Bella. "All set, munchkin?"
Bella nodded, her hand lifting to her head for a salute. "Aye, aye, Captain."
Jenny laughed as he shut the door and stepped back. A bit of worry always consumed him when he watched Bella drive away without him. He supposed that was something that would never change.
When they were out of sight, he started back toward the house only to find Katrina standing at the foot of the steps, surveying the yard. It would be easy for him to just return inside and ignore whatever was going on between them, but there was something within him that just wouldn't allow it. Perhaps, it was the knowledge that nothing good had ever come from them ignoring their problems.
"What are you contemplating?" he asked as he approached her, hoping a little lightheartedness would dull the heat between them. "Where to put all of those flowers I'm about to purchase?"
She smiled, her eyes turning to him as she crossed her arms and shook her head. "You don't have to. I just thought it might be something for us all to do as a family."
Deciding to desperately reach for some levity, he replied, "I actually think it's a wonderful idea. Bella will be over the moon about it."
While she smiled, the action didn't quite reach her eyes. It was undeniable that the air between them had changed to harbor a great deal of tension... not that there was ever many moments when there wasn't tension between them. If only he was better at dissolving such things.
"Katrina, about last night-"
"It doesn't matter," she cut in as she turned away from him and began up the steps. "We were tired and our emotions were running high. We should just forget about all of it. That's what I'm attempting to do, at least."
The abrupt way she dismissed him sparked something in his belly as he watched her walk away from him. It wasn't usually in Katrina's nature to miss an opportunity to set him straight or ridicule his behavior. So, her choosing to avoid the issues between them seemed odd.
What it was that prompted his next move, he couldn't say. Maybe it was her cold words, or the way she turned her back on him, but it had him reacting none the less. Determinedly taking the steps in one stride, he reached out and grasped her by the back of her arm before spinning her around and roughly pressing her into the front door, his mouth claiming hers with little room for objection or resistance. If she thought she was always going to be the one to call the shots, she was gravely mistaken.
The immediate feel of her warm form against his sent him into overdrive as he pushed his body deep against hers, not bothering to show the care he normally would have with her comfort. He wasn't out to hurt her, but he was determined to get her attention. Her small attempt to murmur his name was absorbed by his mouth as he devoured her, desperate to press as firmly into her as possible. The strangled noise that came from the back of her throat as she splayed her fingers over his shoulders ignited the fire that had his hands groping along her sides until he'd found her hip and spread one hand over it, squeezing it as he swiveled his own hips into the apex of her thighs. It would be a lie to say he wasn't aroused by her softness, or the way his body fit perfectly against hers, but, then again, he had no intention of lying to her. It wasn't until she gave a small moan that he finally allowed her some breathing room and parted their lips ever so slightly, allowing them to inhale the heavy, hot air warming the space between their bodies as they panted against one another.
"Ichabod..." she whispered, a shaky breath slipping between her lips as her eyes lifted to his with a searching look about them. "What are you doing?"
The knot forming in his throat was bothersome, but it wasn't near as frustrating as the ache that had settled in his core, begging for release from its pent up need. "It's rather hard to garner your attention without doing something drastic to catch you off guard."
Her eyes remained focused on his as she relaxed in his arms, her body practically melting around him. He swore he could actually feel her muscles uncoiling. "Well, as you have me wedged against this door, you have my full and undivided attention."
"Good," he whispered as he lifted his hand, allowing his fingers to tenderly brush her hair over her ear. "Because what happened matters and I won't forget about it."
The way her brow knit spoke of her confusion and he could hardly blame her for it. It seemed he was as wishy washy towards her as she was towards him.
"I want your eyes on me," he admitted softly, moving his thumb to trace her lips. "I want your skin against me. I want your thoughts to linger toward me. You consume me, make me better, and tear me apart a little more with every day that passes."
Her breath hitched as her fingers dug into his skin, surely leaving bite marks from her nails. "Now, who's playing games?"
Tightening his hold on her hip, he pressed her harder into the door, making sure his center was wedged between her thighs, allowing her the knowledge that he was serious in his need. "This isn't a game, Katrina, and we're not chess pieces to move every which way."
"If that's so, why do you keep changing the rules?" Her eyes narrowed. "Last night, you were sickened by what we did, by how close we came to..."
A noisy breath came from her nose as she attempted to turn her head away, the disappointment and rejection clear in her eyes.
"I wasn't-" He lifted a hand and cupped her cheek, making sure he could see her eyes. "Could you not tell how desperately I needed you?" He pulled her hips harder into his, stifling his own desire to open the door and push her onto the sofa. "How desperately I need you still?"
"You stopped." She closed her eyes, her breathing sharpening as a slight tremble came over her body. "And you decided to refuse me a fair chance."
"If my phone hadn't rang-" He smoothed his finger under her eyes, wishing she would open them. "I stopped because I'm involved with another woman, Katrina, and I owe her my loyalty."
"Loyalty?" she echoed, her eyes opening and cutting into his. "You're my husband."
Swallowing hard to clear his throat, he shook his head, but she grabbed his face and forced him to look at her. "If you're so loyal to her, why did you just kiss me? Why are our clothes the only thing keeping you from being inside me?"
Because he was weak. Because he was selfish. Because he was tired of denying himself. Because she's beautiful. Because he knew she could fulfil him in ways that had nearly become a distant memory. There were a hundred reasons for his kissing her, but there was only one that mattered.
"Because I can't help myself." He sagged against her and dropped his head to her shoulder, relenting to just confessing. "And because I'm in love with you."
The soft way her arms wrapped around his waist and held him left him falling further into her as a weight lifted from him. It didn't help that she began pressing kisses along his neck, her gentle handling of him nearly dropping him to his knees.
"Would you believe me if I said I love you, too?"
He shuddered and shook his head, thousands of words trapped inside him, but only two escaping. "I'd try."
Her lips pressed to his shoulder and began moving toward his face. "I love you, Ichabod Crane. I swear on our children's souls that I love you."
Even his muscles were tired. It wasn't just his emotions, but every part of him had started to fall prey to her. Not even attempting to resist, he turned his head and met her lips, allowing her to take control of the moment, to kiss and touch him the way she wanted. It carried on to the point that he became flushed and dizzy, forcing him to pull away from her and rest his forehead to hers.
It was over now. There was no backtracking or pretending. He was laid bare before her, willing to give this his all, or be rejected while trying.
"Prove it to me."
A paused drifted between them, leaving him wondering if he'd even spoken aloud.
"How?" she asked, her brow knit. "You won't believe anything I say. You've refused to take me at my word at every turn."
"I don't know," he explained, his desperation to resolve this taking the last ounce of strength he possessed. "You're an intelligent woman. I'm sure you can think of something."
"Don't you think I would have already thought of it by now?"
"I need this, Katrina," he whispered, lifting his hand to rest along her cheek. "I need you and I'll do everything you asked of me in return if you just..."
"Everything?" she asked, her eyes falling, the evidence of what she meant written clear as day upon her face.
"I'll talk to her; tell her the truth."
"And what's the truth?" she asked, her eyes returning to his. "I don't even know what the truth is, Ichabod."
"That I love you and I wish I could split myself and make everyone happy, but I can't." He adjusted his stance as he conjured the rest of his confidence. "You and Bella. If I can just make the two of you happy, I'll give my last breath to do it."
Her eyes lifted to his, yet to actually show him that she was pleased with his decision. "Bella's going to be the only person happy about this."
"It'll take adjustment."
"I just mean that... Abbie and Jenny." She shrugged as she threaded their fingers together. "They don't know me; they never have. They've never wanted to."
"And I know you?" he asked, unable to help the question.
Yes, he decided to give this his all, but it didn't mean he was going to walk into it blindly.
Her eyes met his, the gold green bright. "Better than anyone else ever has."
He shook his head, her words doing nothing to help the situation. "That's not very comforting, Katrina."
"It's the truth," she whispered, her eyes holding his. "You've always known my heart, even if you didn't know of my abilities."
"I want to know more," he admitted. "I want to know everything."
"Everything?" Her brow furrowed as she asked, "What do you mean?"
"I mean..." He lifted his hand to run his fingers through her hair. "I want to start at the beginning, at the day we met, and I want you to tell me everything."
"Ichabod, do you have any idea how long that would take?"
"Well, as I'm choosing to believe in your claim to love me, we should have the rest of our lives for you to share everything with me."
As her eyes danced between his, he took the opportunity to lean in and brush his lips over hers, wanting to leave zero doubt to his words. If this was truly to be the moment they once again chose to start their lives together, it would need to be with the intention to be straightforward and clear with one another, leaving no room for secrets and half truths.
"The beginning?" she whispered, her minty breath warming his face. "As in the very first moment?"
"The very first."
"I hated you," she admitted, her smile growing wider with her every word. "I thought you were the vilest of the vile and I wanted to light you on fire."
Chucking, he finally backed away from her, but refused to release her hand. "Is that the truth?"
"The absolute truth," she replied, her face once again harboring that brightness he always enjoyed seeing on her.
"Well, then," he reached past her and opened the door. "I suppose I should admit that while I was outwardly busy admiring your tenacity and refusal to submit to my authority, everything else within me was desperately wanting to get me in-between your legs."
As he held the door open for her, he watched her nearly double over in laughter.
"I'm glad the torment I experienced is so amusing to you. I had to wait nearly four years to get that particular need fulfilled."
After she'd managed to get a hold of herself, she joined him inside and wrapped her arms around his waist. "Don't worry, my love. You'll never have to wait so long to be fulfilled again."
Well, that sufficiently quieted him. Just the mere thought that he could take her to his room and sate every desire he had set his pulse to racing.
"About that," he whispered, his gaze peering down her body as it pressed against him. "I don't think..."
"We'll wait as long as you want." She tilted her head to catch his eyes. "All I want is your love."
The sigh of relief couldn't be helped as he nodded and lifted her fingers to his lips.
"We should probably go get those flowers." He smiled. "Bella will love the surprise when she sees them."
Katrina's small laugh was all the reassurance he needed.
He was hardly a gardener, something he had no qualms with admitting. His strengths came from being a scholar and soldier not an admirer of the earth and soil.
However, as opposed to gardening as he was when it came to something he wished to pursue himself, he couldn't help but want to see Katrina and Bella tackling a project together. This was Katrina's area of expertise and he was sure Bella would learn a great deal from her mother, not just about the beauty in nature, but the benefits in it as well. Being a nurse and someone inclined to use different herbs for spells and potions, Katrina knew what was helpful and what was lethal. She knew enough to make it fun.
The only problem was the one with which he was now faced: choosing the structure for the flower beds that were soon to line his front porch. There were so many different choices that he had to suppress the urge to roll his eyes. The overabundance of brands and products was something he'd become accustomed to over the years, but sometimes it still managed to rub him wrong.
Brick. Wood. Vinyl. Metal.
How in the hell was he supposed to pick one of these? His gut told him to seek the answer out from Katrina who was browsing the flowers just outside in the garden center, but he couldn't bring himself to ask about the one job he'd been given; entrusted with.
"Ichabod?"
Hairs standing up along his neck, he prayed it was a dream as he spun on his heel to find Betsy standing a few feet away.
Not a dream.
"Betsy," he said, a little louder than he probably should have. "Wha-What are you doing here?"
He cast a nervous glance over his shoulder to make sure Katrina hadn't suddenly popped up as well.
Betsy smiled and held up her basket of items. "I was picking up a few things for my classroom." She lifted a bag of popsicle sticks. "A craft Bella will be bringing home next week."
"Oh," he chuckled and ran his hand over the back of his neck. "That's... yes."
"Is she here with you?" She glanced up and down the aisle. "It's rare to see you without her."
"Jenny took her to the zoo."
"Ah." Betsy nodded, her smile sweet. "I bet she'll enjoy that."
His shoes suddenly became the most interesting things in the store. When had he become such a loathsome person?
"It's good to see you."
With a deep breath, he lifted his gaze as guilt began forming in his chest. She deserved so much better than this. There weren't many people he considered such genuinely good souls, but she was most definitely one of them. In all honesty, she was too good for him.
"Betsy, I-" He shook his head, knowing no words, no matter how eloquently put, would dull the betrayal. It was with that thought that he decided to just be straightforward with it. "I kissed Katrina."
There. It was out there. He'd said it. The consequences would just have to be what they were. Secrets had never been his strongest suit and he did his best to avoid them.
However, the way Betsy's smile slipped from her face was enough to make him feel like the worst fool ever conceived. Maybe Katrina had been right in her thinking the first time she saw him. He was the vilest of the vile.
"Oh." She laughed under her breath as she avoided his eyes. "I see."
Brow knitting as he tried to find some words of comfort, he added, "I'm so sorry."
With a small shrug of her shoulders, she admitted, "I can't say I'm surprised. Rumor around town is she's sleeping in your bed and you've began carting her everywhere you go."
It wasn't that he thought he was undeserving of her words, so much as surprised she'd uttered them.
"Betsy-"
"I don't want to come off as some insecure, jealous girlfriend, but it's hard to wrap my mind around all of this."
Eyes on his feet again, he nodded. "You're not the only one."
"Ichabod..." Her fingers were suddenly sliding over his cheek. "It's only natural that you'd become vulnerable around her. She's Bella's mother."
"It's more than that," he whispered, his eyes closing as he pulled her hand from his cheek. "She's more than that."
"I know."
Before he could complete another thought, she'd stepped into his air space and softly pressed her lips to his. So shocked, he stood there like a limp buffoon, barely even breathing.
What was she doing? He'd just confessed to kissing another woman and she'd chosen to punish him by kissing him, herself? It was clear he was never going to understand women.
When she pulled back, she whispered, "I don't expect you to have all the answers right now. I just want to know that I matter to you."
"Of course, you matter," he replied, his thoughts muddled. "I care about you, but-"
She smiled and went in to kiss him again. It was odd that he was more resistant to the feeling than he had been a week ago. Now, he felt like he was truly being unfaithful.
Pressing his fingers into her arms, he gently pulled away from her. "Betsy, I can't-" A glimpse of red caught his eye, causing him to lose his breath all together. "Katrina."
It was like a nightmare; a train wreck in the making.
As Betsy turned to face Katrina, her hand stayed on his chest, the very place Katrina's eyes were focused. Surprisingly enough, she wasn't glaring, or frowning. She was just staring.
Quickly, and as politely and tactfully as he could manage, he took Betsy's hand and lowered it before letting it go and taking a full step away from her.
"I, uhm," he gestured between them. "The two of you met..."
"Yes," Katrina said, a smile suddenly appearing, one he knew to be insincere. "We did."
Betsy, while recovering much slower than Katrina, stood straighter, her own smile polite and cordial. "I sort of feel like I already know you. Bella gets so excited every time she mentions you."
He felt ill. They were being too kind to one another. Well, one was being kind. The other... well, she was putting on a good show borne from centuries of practice.
Katrina chuckled. "I could say the same of you."
Clearing his throat, he gestured to the shelves behind Betsy. "We were just getting some things for a flower garden. Katrina thought Bella might like the project."
Betsy raised an eyebrow. "Oh, that's so thoughtful. I'm sure she'll enjoy that." She paused. "So, you're staying for a while, then?"
Katrina's eyes cut toward him, but he had little response time before she said, "Permanently."
Wishing he could disappear, he turned to Betsy as she said, "I'm sure Bella's pleased. I have a friend who's a realtor. I'm sure he'd be happy to help you find a house at a good price."
It was the gentlest underlying threat he'd ever heard. However, as Katrina once again met his eyes, he noticed her brow slightly raise and sighed. If he survived this without some sort of physical ramifications, he'd be lucky.
"Bella's enjoying her mother so much. I just think it's best she stay in the same house with her."
Now, he had two sets of eyes on him, neither one looking pleased with him. How could they play nice with each other, but not him?
"I'm sorry, that's just..." Betsy laughed. "A little unheard of for a divorced couple."
Oh God, he thought as he wiped a hand down his face.
"We're not..." He turned to Katrina with a pleading expression. "Would you mind...?"
She lifted an eyebrow before she smiled at Betsy. "Lovely to see you again, Ms. Ross."
With that, she turned and headed back toward the flowers.
"What's going on?" Betsy asked as she watched Katrina leave. "I kinda feel like the two of you were having some whole other conversation."
For four months, he'd been dating this woman. She'd followed every wish he'd had in regards to Bella and his unwillingness to take their relationship all the way to bed. She'd been a godsend that both he and Bella adored. Now, he was about to crush her and he found himself reluctant to do so at the same time he knew he had to see it done.
"Betsy, I-"
"You figured it out."
Her words had him lifting his head to see the truth written in her eyes. "I can't- I can never express to you how sorry I am."
She nodded and looked in the direction Katrina had went. "She's beautiful." The resentment was in her voice even as she tried to hide it. "You didn't tell me that."
"You're beautiful," he replied. "You know how beautiful I think you are."
"Ichabod..."
This was hardly a conversation to be had in a public place. Why did his life always have to be played out with an audience? He felt as thought he'd spent hundreds of years being watched and studied. "It wasn't relevant as she was a non factor in my life. There was no need to speak of her."
"Was." Betsy sighed. "But she is now."
"She's Bella's mother-"
"And you're ex wife," she finished, her eyes returning to his. "It's only been four days, Ichabod. She spent five years not being a part of Bella's life and you just let her waltz back in with barely any resistance?"
Deciding to just bite the bullet, he admitted, "She's my wife. We never..."
Betsy's eyes widened. "You're still married?"
Why did that sound so much worse than it actually was?
"We separated a long time ago and our marriage wasn't the conventional sort. We couldn't just go to the courthouse and file for divorce."
With an incredulous look, she said, "Be that as it may, it isn't like you to make such a rash decision, Ichabod, especially not when it's concerning Bella."
He held out his hands. "I know you're upset and that I've hurt you-"
"Hurt me?" she scoffed as she crossed her arms and stepped back. "You're not hurting me because I refuse to believe this is you acting rationally. What kind of hold does she have on you that you'd turn your life upside down for her?"
"Love," he whispered. "The kind of love I can't describe."
"It sounds more like lust than love," Betsy argued. "She's seducing you."
He couldn't help but chuckle, improper as it was to do so. Katrina manipulate him? It seemed more people knew her than she gave credit.
"That's quite likely," he admitted. "Katrina's very skilled at manipulation and using all of her wiles to get what she wants."
"That you can admit that and still trust her is beyond my comprehension."
"I never said I trusted her," he quickly replied. "I'm not jumping into bed with her and pretending like everything's perfect, but I am giving her a chance to prove she's changed. She deserves a fair chance." Before she could respond, he softly smiled. "I'm sorry, Betsy. I wish I could have done this differently, but I just... Time is precious and we're not promised tomorrow."
For a long moment, she stared at him.
It didn't really seem as though she believed he was breaking up with her. She actually looked like she thought he was under some kind of spell.
"I think you're making a mistake."
"I understand why you feel that way," he said. "But it's my mistake to make."
"And when it affects Bella?" she asked, her eyes searching him. "What, then?"
The fact that she was concerned for Bella made him feel even worse.
"I'll deal with it then, but, if there's one thing I know, Katrina values Bella's happiness as deeply as I do. If anyone is going to come out of this unscathed, it's her." Not knowing what else to say, he bowed his head to her. "I wish you the very best, Betsy."
As the automatic doors of the Garden Center slid shut in his wake, he found her hovering over a few flower pots, her long, red hair hanging in front of her. She looked so beautiful in the sunlight coming through the ceiling. It was while he was watching her that it occurred to him that in the span of one morning, everything had shifted in his life. When he'd awoken, he'd had doubts, but a strong yearning to make her happy. He'd been involved with one woman only to now be involved with another which, in all honesty, made him sound like a terrible person. Upon waking, he'd been concerned about everyone's opinion; Abbie's, Jenny's, Betsy's, Katrina's, Bella's. What he hadn't been doing was truly assessing his own needs. How could he help anyone if he wasn't taking care of himself?
Since waking in that cave all those years ago, his entire existence had revolved around one mission after another. He'd been a Witness. He'd had to free Katrina from one foe or another. He'd become obsessed with fatherhood and supplying Bella with everything that both a father and mother should be giving her. What he'd failed to do is make himself happy and had instead shared in all the moments he could from other people. Now, he was indulging in something that had the potential to relieve him of many of the weights in his life; something that would allow him a reprieve from responsibility and give him a small bit of happiness that was just his. Truthfully, he missed being married. As vulgar as she'd made it sound, Katrina had been right in what she'd said to him when he'd sought out her help. He missed having someone to return home to, someone who would take care of him for a change, someone to make dinner for him, to make love to him; someone who would share in his hurts, in his worries. With Katrina, he could have all of those things. It was just going to take some freely given trust on his part to get there.
"Find what you want?"
She shrugged her shoulders as she reached out to cup the petals on one of the flowers before her. "A few things."
He prayed her lack of eye contact with him wasn't a prelude to his learning she was upset with him. Stepping up to her side, he tilted his head to see her face. "Are you angry with me?"
"Why would I be angry?" she asked, never taking her eyes from the flowers she was sorting through.
"Well..." He flicked a dead leaf from the table. "She was kissing me."
"Yes, she was," Katrina said with a chuckle. "And you were hardly interested in it."
Raising an eyebrow at her surety, he asked, "How do you know that? Betsy's quite a skilled kisser."
She stood straight and turned to him, mischief dancing in her eyes. "Because..."
The next thing she did was place her hands on his sides and lean up to brush her lips to his, teasing him by not fully pressing into him. Instead, she barely touched his lips and pulled away before coming at him from another angle. By the time he had her against him, he felt his pants growing tighter.
"Any more questions?" she asked, as she slipped her hand between them to tease his zipper.
Out of breath from doing absolutely nothing, he whispered, "No."
"Good," she said, untangling from him and returning to the flowers. "Now, I want this one and three of those over there."
Alrighty then, I managed to get up early enough to finish this update before I left. I hope it's going smoothly enough to follow, but I'm just warning you to not get too comfortable. There are many more obstacles to come. Let me know what you think.
Next up: The fair. Talk of Jeremy and Abraham. More Abbie and Katrina confrontations. Bella makes a new friend.