A/N: It's Friday night for me, so that means there's a brand new chapter for you guys! I'm going to keep thanking you all for all the reviews :) Without you I wouldn't be writing this! So here you go, hope you enjoy it :D

I don't own anything :)

Chapter 15. I Won't Give Up

"When I look into your eyes
It's like watching the night skies
Or a beautiful sunrise
There's so much they hold
And just like them old stars
I see that you've come so far
To be right where you are
How old is your soul?

I won't give up on us, even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love, I'm still looking up

And when you're needing your space, to do some navigating
I'll be here patiently waiting, to see what you find"

"I Won't Give Up – Jason Mraz"

"Stop fidgeting, will you?"

The loud clinking of her heels was reverberating against the hallway's walls and the rustling of her agitated hands was completing the intervals of silence. She wasn't usually an agitated person, she was way too controlling for that, preferring keeping everything inside her than sharing it with the world.

"Yeah like that's gonna happen…" Caitlin grumbled, her hands twisting her blouse as they walked side by side down the hall. She couldn't help it, her whole body was buzzing with energy and nervousness. All of a sudden, she was that teenager again that was waiting for her first oral exam – an excited nervous wreck of a girl.

"There's no need to be nervous." Barry tried to calm her down, though he knew it would be pointless now.

She just glared sideways at him. "Well my nerves seem to completely disagree with you." She was used too high-stress situations, she had studied for so many years with hundreds of exams, she had gone to lots of interviews, she had had done experiments with great responsibilities… And here she was, back in those long hallways, a knot forming in the pit of her stomach.

Barry chuckled. "They're just kids, Cait."

"No they're not." She protested, suddenly stopping dead in her tracks.

Barry stopped as well and turned to look at her with a frown. She was standing tall in the middle of the empty corridor, hands firmly sitting on her hips and a stern look on her face.

"They're teenagers, Barry!" She pointed out.

"So?" He asked, not grasping her point.

"So?" Caitlin gaped at him in bewilderment. "So teenagers are ruthless and mean! I'm going to make a fool of myself. I know high school. I went to high school too, you know?"

Barry rolled his eyes. "I do know that, I was there with you." He teased. "Come on, you're going to be just fine."

"How can you say that?" She whined. "What makes you so sure?"

The young man took a step forward and rested his hands on her shoulders. He bowed a little to look straight in her eyes. "Because I've been there too, and I know you." He simply said. "I know how awesome you are and I'm the one who suggested this to you in the first place. I wouldn't have suggested it if I knew they would eat you alive." Caitlin glared at him and he chuckled. "Trust me, they are going to love you!"

For a moment, she got lost in his sea-green eyes and completely forgot where she was and all about the nervous ball at the pit of her stomach. She didn't think she had been this nervous ever since her first day working at S.T.A.R. labs.

Caitlin took a deep breath and slowly nodded. "Okay, I'm a grown woman, I can face them." She said to herself, amusing Barry in the process. "Let's go Mr. Allen" She said more firmly.

He beamed at her, took a step aside and swiped his arm in front of them, gallantly letting her lead the way. "After you, Dr. Snow."

The loud clutter of her high heels resumed as they made their way towards his classroom.

A few days ago, barely a week after coming back from their little stay at the beach, Barry had convinced her to come teach a class about basic genetics to his biology class. Sure he could do it himself, but he had thought it could be really interesting and resourceful to ask for her professional help. That way, his students could have an inside look into the real genetic world and he could help Caitlin do something she loved at the same time.

She had been reluctant at first but Barry had quickly managed to convince her. She did get bored really fast at home without her job.

So here they were, heading towards his classroom for her to teach a one-hour class.

The bell rang a few minutes after they got into his classroom and Caitlin immediately stood straighter, in her full height, her nervous hands flattening the small creases from her shirt. Barry chewed on the inside of his cheek to keep a chuckle from escaping. Bit by bit, teenagers came into the room, chatting together, laughing, going to their table, and barely sparing a single glance to the two adults in the front.

When the second bell rang, the students sat down and stopped talking relatively quickly.

"Well hello everyone! I know we didn't quite finish the lesson on the digestive system, but we're going to take a little break from that just for today." Barry explained as he stepped in front of his desk. "As you can see, I'm not alone today. This is the brilliant Dr. Caitlin Snow." He slightly turned to the side and gestured towards the woman that had already caught the attention of most of the students.

"She's a dear friend of mine and we went together to this high school when we were your age. I know you probably think that was centuries ago but please spare our feelings." Barry continued talking with a soothing yet captivating voice, smiling proudly as his little joke created a few chuckles among the teenagers. "She's a geneticist and a bioengineer, and she is here today to talk to you about human genetics. So I know one hour is far from enough to talk about this huge subject, but I'm sure she'll do great to present you the basics. I expect you to treat her with as much respect as you treat me. Any questions?"

Barry smiled at his silent class, waiting to see if anyone wanted his attention. "No? Okay then." He turned to Caitlin. "Dr. Snow, the class is yours."

Caitlin gave him a shy smile. She moved to the front of his desk and he leaned over to grab a notepad and a pen from his desk. As they brushed passed each other, Barry winked at her, knowing that nobody would see him as his back was to the students. Caitlin clenched her jaw to keep herself from blushing and Barry moved to the back of the class, with a smug grin hovering over his lips, to follow her lesson.

Caitlin quickly presented herself and then immediately opened into her subject. Barry was impressed by the ease with which she had shed all her previous nervousness and replaced it by confidence, her doctor persona clearly visible. His heart swelled when he found that passionate twinkle shine in her eyes again. He hadn't seen it in a very long time and was relieved to see it was still alive. He felt even more proud when his students began interacting fully with Caitlin, asking questions, making relevant comments and answering to her inquiries.

The single hour flew by so fast that everybody seemed surprised when the bell rang. Barry stayed in the back of his class, his smile still in place as he saw almost half of his students waiting by the desk, ready to ask Caitlin their burning questions. It was their lunch break so some of them didn't hesitate to spend more time with her instead of running towards the cafeteria.

Barry stood up and approached the desk as just two young girls remained by her side.

"Here are my contact info," Caitlin handed both girls her personal card, "don't hesitate to send me an e-mail if you have any questions about professional orientation. Or anything else, really, I'd be happy to help!"

Both girls thanked her and left the room. Barry clapped loudly in his hands as soon as they were alone. Caitlin became beet red in a second and turned around to swipe off the black board, escaping his burning gaze in the process.

"Well, Dr. Snow, one hour in your hands and my students already love you more than they love me." He noted with a fake offended tone in his voice.

"They do not!" Caitlin squealed with a roll of her eyes.

"Yeah they do." He insisted with bouncing eyebrows even though she wasn't looking in his direction. "I think I'm jealous they like you better than me."

"Oh shush."

Barry chuckled and came up behind her, stopping her movement with one hand on her waist and the other on her arm. She immediately tensed up, surprised by his touch and closeness.

"Leave it," he said quietly, "I'll clean this up later. Let's go grab something to eat."

Caitlin nodded silently – physically incapable to utter a single word with his chest so close to her back. Barry let her go and took a few steps back from her. She straightened up her shirt and then pulled her hair up into a messy bun to occupy herself and keep her mind off Barry. Especially since she could still sense him staring at her back.

Barry seemed to catch himself staring and instantly wrenched his eyes away from her, clearing his throat as he grabbed his set of keys and his bag. Caitlin shyly glanced in his direction, when he wasn't looking, before grabbing her own bag and following him out of his classroom.

They headed towards the teachers' lounge, where Barry picked up their lunch bag he had prepared in the morning, before going outside to the high school's stadium. Without a word, they stepped on the deserted bleachers and found their usual spot.

Their spot.

Being on the track team, Barry had spent a lot of time training in this stadium as a teenager. And Caitlin had gotten into the habit of coming sitting there, right in front of the running tracks, to study while he ran. Barry would always joke that she was either checking him out or keeping an eye on him to make sure that he wasn't cheating on her with some cheerleader. But truthfully, Caitlin only loved this place because Barry's presence had an impressive calming effect on her.

And god knows how much she needed to just relax sometimes, even if she was studying.

And then, that precise spot on the bleachers, right in the middle row, had become their spot where they would meet for lunch sometimes, or when they had a break in their day or simply when they just wanted to be alone.

Their spot.

"Wow, it's been a while since I sat here." Caitlin whispered as they finally sat down.

Barry nodded, handing her a sandwich. "I have to confess, I came here half a dozen times ever since I got my teaching position. But it never felt right being here without you. So I stopped coming and found myself a new place to hang out at lunch."

"And where is that? The science lab?" Caitlin chuckled, nudging him playfully. Her brain decided to ignore the fact that he had stopped coming because she was missing. And their spot wasn't the same without both of them there.

"Hey!" He half-heartedly protested. "I'll have you known that I don't always hang out in the same place. Sometimes I mix with the crowd."

Caitlin raised an eyebrow. "The crowd?" She carefully asked.

Barry shrugged. "Yeah you know… The other teachers… sometimes students…"

Her eyes went round. "Oh don't tell me you're one of those teachers that think they're young enough to still pass as a teenager. That's just creepy."

The young man blushed furiously at her surprised face. "I'm not." He protested in a weak voice. "Okay, maybe sometimes I joke around with students…" He admitted when she rolled her eyes at him, unimpressed. "But in my defence, do you really see me hanging out with Mrs. Carsen and Mr. Dolight?"

A giggle escaped Caitlin's lips at the idea of Barry spending his free time with the two probably oldest teachers from this school – teachers that, ten years ago, every student was already saying the coming year would be their last before retirement. Obviously it never was, since those two teachers were still here.

In silence, they unwrapped their small lunch and ate, watching the current high school track team beginning their training.

"So… how are you doing, really?" Barry broke the silence with a question that had been on the tip his tongue for some time now.

Caitlin took a bite of her sandwich and shrugged. "I told you, I'm fine." She informed him once swallowing down her bite, her eyes fixed on a young man – that eerily reminded her of teenage Barry – running. "You don't have to worry that much about me, Barry."

"I know I don't have to, but I can't help it." He replied very seriously, his eyes boring holes in her skin.

He had the ability to make her heart go into frenzy and exasperate her at the same time. And as usual, she ignored the one that made her feel special.

"Yes well, could you please tone it down a bit?" Caitlin huffed in annoyance, finally looking at him and not missing him flinch at her comment. "I'm a grown woman, you don't have to babysit me 24/7 just because I lost my job and my fiancé."

She instantly saw his eyes darkened with anger and his features turning hard. And her heart sank in her chest.

"Well excuse me for caring." Barry groaned, the hurt edge of his voice unavoidable.

Caitlin let out a puff of air and ran a hand over her face, making sure not to smudge any of her make up. "I'm sorry," she sighed and she felt him instantly relax next to her, "I didn't mean to sound like a bitch."

His shoulders sagged down and he slowly shook his head, his eyes trying to read her features. "Why do you keep pushing me away?" He asked carefully.

She let out a nervous chuckle before shrugging again, trying to give herself a detached demeanour. "I just feel like you're giving and giving… and I'm just here taking everything from you without giving anything back to you."

"Cait…" Barry whispered and her heart missed a beat at the sound of her nickname rolling down his lips so, so, perfectly.

She lifted her hand to stop him from talking. "You can't deny it, Barry. You've literally done everything to help me. You got me out of the house to relax, you invited me to the beach for a week, you gave me the opportunity to teach a class…" Caitlin took a deep breath and wrenched her eyes away from his, looking down to her intertwined hands – sandwich forgotten on her lap. "And I've got nothing to give you back in return, I even managed to break your relationship…"

"We already talked about this." Barry cut her off. "That wasn't your fault."

His relationship with Patty was completely over. He felt really bad for how he had treated her, but after their conversation after the beach holidays, they had both realised there wasn't really a future for the both of them together. And they had both accepted it. Barry hadn't been heartbroken when Patty had given him the spare key to his place he had given to her the previous year. They had been together more than two years and had never moved in together. Barry hadn't even ever thought about asking her. They just weren't meant to be and, in his opinion, that wasn't Caitlin's fault.

"Yes it is, Barry!" Caitlin protested, eyes welling up. She was tired of hearing him say that. "I really want to give you something in return, I want to show you how grateful I am for everything that you've done! But I have nothing… I'm broken…" Her voice cracked a bit at the end of her tirade and his heart dropped in his chest.

"No you're not." Barry said with the softest voice she had ever heard. "Cait, look at me." He insisted when she persistently stared at her hands. Shyly, her glistening orbs flew up and dived into his green sea. "You are not broken. You're just hiding that wonderful woman I see, behind those walls of yours."

A small blush appeared on her cheeks despite the sadness that seemed to have taken hold of her. She snorted, trying to ease up the tension.

Barry gave her a bright smile, finding her really cute at the moment, despite the tears just waiting to escape her eyes. "And don't worry about giving me anything." He simply said. "You being here is already more than enough for me."

Her heart stopped and then picked up its pace at his words. Caitlin almost jumped in surprised as she felt his warm hand cover her cold ones.

"Cait…" He breathed out.

She felt the urge to grasp at his hand and never let go, she itched to throw her arms around his neck and hold him against her forever, as if her life was depending on it.

But there was a weight in her heart she couldn't really ignore. Ronnie was still almost constantly on her mind, when it wasn't otherwise occupied by the young biology teacher sitting next to her.

Ronnie had been the light in the dark moments of her life. How was she supposed to find the way without him? She could see the light emanating from Barry, but could she use him to lead the way towards healing? Was it fair to him and to her?

Caitlin knew Ronnie would have wanted for her to move on and she felt like she was getting there. Slowly but surely.

But she still didn't know if Barry was the right person to move on with. First of all, she had no idea if he even wanted to go there – though it seemed like he did. Second of all, she was terrified of giving him that power over her again. He was her first love, the boy that would always have a hold over her heart. But it also made him the person who had the power to break her heart the most.

The power to break her completely if things went wrong.

And that scared the life out of her.

Her eyes flitted between their joined hands and his deep green eyes. Then she could've sworn she saw him lean forward a bit and she felt her heart leap in her chest. Her eyes flew down to his Adam's apple bobbing up and down as he swallowed, before going back up to his eyes, making a stop at his lips. She felt like his hand was sending electricity all over her skin.

And then his lips were touching hers in the most delicate way possible and her eyes fluttered close. The feeling of electricity sent by his hand was nothing compared to the one sent by his soft lips against hers. It wasn't passionate, or heated, or hungry. It was a simple touch of lips against lips. Brief but powerful.

As soon as it had begun, it had ended.

Barry pulled slightly away, the green of his eyes even deeper than before, if possible. "You're not broken…" He repeated in a whisper.

Her heart did acrobatics in her chest, a feeling he had always been able to create, a feeling she had loved as a teenager – not being in control of her own body for such a beautiful reason. At the time, she hadn't been scared of it because she knew nothing bad could come out of it. But she was older, she had seen how life could break people, how loss could destroy someone, how a broken heart felt worst than anything else.

So today she just couldn't enjoy the way her crazy heart stumbled in her chest, as fear gripped her entire being.

"Barry, I can't…" She murmured.

He instantly retracted his hand as if he had been burned and shook his head, his eyes escaping her. "I'm sorry, you're right. I overstepped…"

"No I… I'm sorry, I… I just…" Caitlin stuttered, not really sure of what she wanted to actually say. The mess in her head made it impossible for her to make a decent constructed sentence. "I'm… I'm not ready… Barry… I'm… not yet…"

His big round eyes travelled back to her face and he looked like a lost puppy trying to apologise for making a mess. "I know… I'm… I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me…"

He stopped as they eyes locked together once more and his intangible hold over her seemed to pull her back towards him. She had to fight against it to avoid burying herself in his arms.

"I… I should probably go…" Caitlin croaked, almost feeling out of energy. How could she feel that tired when she didn't even have any work to go to? "Thanks for letting me teach your class and for lunch." She grabbed what was left of her sandwich and stood up.

Barry shot out of his seat too, propelling the bag that had been resting on his lap to the floor, startling Caitlin but not even fazing him. "I should be the one to thank you. My students loved you."

Caitlin nervously looked down to her hand and trapped her lower lip between her teeth. Somehow, she could still taste the lingering scent of him on her lips, even though their kiss had been fleetingly small. "See you soon, Barry." She whispered before making a beeline down the bleachers' stairs and almost running down the last steps that allowed her to exit the stadium.

And she was gone.

Barry slumped back down and buried his hands in his hair. He had no idea what had taken hold of him. Well, actually he knew. Being back here sitting on their spot, being with her, seeing that passion in her eyes, her telling him how grateful she was for everything he had done… His heart had been close to exploding right there and then. But he should have known better than to scare her away like that by making a move on her – even if it was as small as the kiss they had shared. He wouldn't have pushed further, that simple kiss would have been more than enough for him. He had just wanted to make her understand how he felt, how special she was to him… But he shouldn't have done it. Clearly, she wasn't ready.

Or maybe she was ready, but was scared of something else.

Whatever it was, he wouldn't go anywhere. Even if it meant they'd stay friend, he was okay with it.

As long as she was in his life.

A/N: please don't hate me... Did you really think I would make it easy for them?

Anyway, see you guys next week!