She was so tired.

It had been a week since the confrontation in Salamanca, and Pilar's shoulder still pained her greatly. After their escape, and finding shelter in a small village just south of the city, they'd spent the better part of a day fixing her up as best they could. Of course, it called for Pilar to get some supplies from one of the shops, which had been easy enough, but without the use of her right arm, it had proven to be far more difficult than she had expected. She was aware of her missing limb, and felt rather lopsided while walking, but she couldn't help but to feel like everyone stared as she walked by, seeing the irritated skin from the ripping of her arm-red, inflamed and painful-rather than a woman who had just faced an enemy far more dangerous than they could know.

Luckily for her, she was able to cover her missing appendage with a cloak-like cape which draped over her shoulders and down her torso, keeping her disfigurement from view. Even when she first lost her arm, she'd been highly self conscious about it, taking care to cover herself as best as possible, even in the Spanish, summer heat. Of course, a few months after her accident, they fitted her with the mech limb which now was stuffed in the very bottom of Roadhog's saddlebags, hidden away from the light of day. Pilar supposed it was a good thing, though; it only reminded her of her father.

Their camp-really, it was only a circle of their possessions scattered about, forming a makeshift wall around their sleeping mats-was made well enough, and Pilar sat near Roadhog's motorcycle, absentmindedly picking at the sockets that had since been repositioned. It was odd, not feeling the coolness of the metal of her once-arm, and she was still rather uncomfortable without it, but it wouldn't do her well to dwell on it for any longer.

Feeling herself jolt forward as a heavy hand whacked the back of her head, nearly causing her to lose her balance, Pilar yelped in surprise, so lost in her thoughts that she'd not heard anyone approach. Her hand shot out in front of her, bracing herself from a fall, and yet she wobbled, still not used to the unbalance of her body. Catching herself, Pilar straightened, only to watch as Roadhog shuffled to her side, taking a seat next to her on the grassy ground, his eyes flashing behind the lenses of his mask. She shrunk under his authoritative gaze, and quickly glanced away, her nose wrinkling, knowing well the reason he had smacked her.

"Quit picking at it," he growled, leaning back on his hands. "You'll rip them open again."

He was right, naturally, and yet she still reached absentmindedly to her shoulder, tracing around one of the exposed sockets. It pained her, and she winced, but not before Roadhog's meaty hand had wrapped around her wrist, forcing her arm back to her side. He did not let go, either. Well aware that Pilar was having a hard time leaving it be, he'd seen it all the time with Junkrat's limbs; anytime the man threw off his arm or leg, he was always there, picking at the stump below. It earned him a few, well-aimed smacks to the head, and though it took a while, he eventually learned not to do so...at least around Roadhog.

"Sorry," she grumbled, shoulders slouching wearily. She could have made an excuse for herself, but she had neither willpower nor reason to do so. It was what it was, and she would soon have to get used to her lost limb; there was no telling when it would be fixed, or even replaced. But that also meant she would have to relearn all her combat techniques, and while she was ambidextrous, it wouldn't be the same. Her balance was already off, and she walked with an obvious lean to the left, as it was weighed down by her own, flesh arm.

"Hmph." Her eyes flashed back to Roadhog as he grunted, and he steadily released her wrist, though he did not let his hand venture far. If he knew anything, she would be picking at it again, unconsciously or not, and they'd just managed to heal her up as best as they could; he didn't need her causing an unintentional infection that would require actual medical attention.

"So what do we do now?" she asked, her eyes flashing to the area before her. "We can't just sit here, and I'm hardly of any use at the moment." While it wasn't completely true, she was still getting used to combat without her arm; Roadhog had been more than helpful to get her acclimated to the situation, and while he still laid her flat-not that it was any different when she was able-bodied-it had helped her get a grasp on how to work around her disability.

She had started to pick at her arm unconsciously again, not having noticed until she felt her arm being jerked away, a displeased growl escaping Roadhog. This time, he did not let go, and Pilar's fingers drummed impatiently against the ground. She could not garner what Roadhog thought-hell, there was hardly a time where she even could get him to speak, but then again, that was the sort of man he was-and there was an awkward vibe permeating the air as they sat in silence.

With a sigh, her gaze ventured to the makeshift camp, a slight breeze ruffling her hair about her face. Junkrat had been unusually quiet since they'd left Salamanca; while there was little difference in her personality as a whole, what had happened between Pilar and her father seemed to have shaken him, even if only a little bit. Still, he'd been rather secretive in whatever it was he was doing, shoving his project-whatever it was-out of sight whenever Pilar, or even Roadhog, approached. It piqued her interest to say the very least, and though she did express her desire to possibly help in his secret affairs, Junkrat had always declined, instead changing the subject, smothering her in his particular brand of affection that always did the trick in distracting her. Still, even as her gaze fixed on him now, his back turned to she and Roadhog, her curiosity began to get the better of her. Whatever he tinkered with, screwdriver in hand, glancing at some sort of plans on the ground beside him, tongue sticking out, it had Pilar watching him closely, jerking on her hand to get Roadhog to release her.

Roadhog, noticing, tilted his head as he glanced at her, but said nothing. She seemed eager enough to get going, and while there was still a chance that she would cause herself infection if she was not careful, he loosened his grip on her wrist, shrugging nonchalantly as he drew out his weapon. She slipped her hand from his quickly, and as he began cleaning off the blood he had managed to gather upon it, it became clear that he was likely not going to add anything more to the conversation. With a huff, she drew her legs to her chest, wrapping her arm around them and resting her chin upon her knees, watching the camp vaguely, unimpressed.

Her eyes fixed on Junkrat again, and she could hear him muttering angrily to himself, scratching the back of his head in frustration as whatever he worked on was not going exactly as he planned. Consulting his plans again, he rubbed his nose, a line of grease appearing over the bridge of it, yellow eyes darting back and forth as he studied intently. After a moment, he returned to the unseen project, ripping some sort of gear from it and tossing over his shoulder, several feet away, a pleased grunt escaping him as it fixed whatever problem he had. Glancing at Roadhog, who did not seem interested in the slightest as he began fiddling with the trigger, she rose-albeit with difficulty-to her feet. Stretching, she raised her arm high above her head-she swore she could feel her missing limb-groaning as her sore muscles felt the relief from sitting on the ground for so long. Striding toward Junkrat, rather lopsided, Pilar rolled her shoulders as she rubbed her neck, feeling it crack in relief. Her quiet approach was completely lost on him; so entranced with his project, he did not hear the woman draw nearer, even after she accidentally smashed her bootless foot on a rock, but then again, Pilar was quite sure that his hearing had been fucked from his destructive tendencies. Still, as she reached him, bending at the waist to poke her head over his shoulder, his realization of her proximity had the junker bounding upward with a surprised yelp. She's not managed to see what he was working on; he'd shoved something metallic in his pack nearby before she could register what it was, along with several worn tools and a mess of screws. She gave him a perplexed look, but he didn't notice. Rather, he ushered her away quickly, hands planted firmly on her shoulders, his chest shoved against her back as his pace was faster than Pilar wanted to go.

"Was I interrupting something?" she mused, digging her heels into the ground, making it more difficult for him to drag her away from the camp, a wicked grin lifting her features. She could hear him grunt, whether displeased or not, she could not tell, but even as she made her weight heavier against him, she suddenly felt herself being lifted into the air when he crouched, arm wrapping right around her thighs and hoisting her onto his shoulder. Yelping in surprise, she struggled to keep her balance, and wrapping her arm around his neck, she felt herself jolted about by the pronounced limp he walked with. Her nose wrinkled; she wasn't entirely sure that she liked being up so high; it was only then she realized how tall he really was, and unable to hold on as she liked without the use of her other arm, she was far from comfortable being so high.

"Nah, ya weren't," he replied distractedly, a smug grin plastered across his face as she clung tightly to his shoulders. Shifting his head slightly, he saw her face poking from over his shoulder, and she stuck her tongue out him, earning her a pleased chuckle when he smashed his nose against hers. "S'nothin' important, Caterpillar."

"Then why hide it?" she asked, and steadily, Junkrat crouched, allowing her to slide off of his shoulder, feet landing on the ground lightly. Pushing her hair out of her eyes, she turned back to him, lips pursed as her eyes narrowed, watching him suspiciously as he pointedly avoided her question. "You've not been the same since Salamanca, you know. I worry about you."

Her words seemed to trigger something within him, and Junkrat, turned away, rubbing the back of his head sheepishly. His features twisted into something akin to embarrassed shame, and shaking his head, he began to pace uncomfortably. He was on edge; his fingers drummed incessantly against his thigh, yellow eyes darting around the area as though searching for an ambush. Concern colored her features as she watched, and her arm fell to her side when he turned away, both hands coming to clutch both sides of his head. It took only a moment for Pilar to realize what was happening; he spoke in hushed growls to the air, his shoulders hunching protectively, as though guarding himself from forces unseen.

Without hesitation, Pilar lunged forward, knowing well that he was on the brink of a mental break. It had not been long since their encounter with her father, but it was just enough to trigger something in his head that caused his breakdowns more frequently than she had ever seen. Instantly, her hand reached for his shoulder, but he jerked away, sinking lower to the ground in a panic. Soon enough, he was crouching, shoulders shaking violently, his growling becoming louder, more panicked as he battled the demons raging within.

She was unsure how to go about this. Should she get Roadhog? How long had this been brewing within him and she hadn't noticed? She should have! Maybe there was some sort of way that she would have been able to prevent it, but then again, she remembered what Roadhog had said one night when Junkrat had had an episode they'd not been able to stop.

It happens. Radiation's a bitch, and sometimes you can't stop the ghosts from haunting the fuck out of him.

It had been a rough night, Pilar could remember. He had broken down, very nearly like he was now, though nowhere near as serious as he appeared. Consoling didn't work, and that morning-after Pilar had listened to him breaking down all night-there was a new bald patch on his scalp from where he had ripped out his hair all throughout the night. She still didn't know what it was that had triggered it, and perhaps she never would, but the least she could do was to be there for him, if that was the sort of thing he needed.

"Ya could've died. Ya could've fuckin' died," he finally croaked, shaking his head quickly. "They're still tellin' me ya should be dead."

Freezing on the spot, Pilar could not help but to stare as he spoke, taken aback by what he had said. Was that what had brought on his panic? Fear for her life, fear that she could have died at the hands of Talon-Sombra and Sangre-which she very well almost did. Her hand eased toward her shoulder; fingers traced over the circular sockets, the edges of her skin raw and red from where they were attached. A bit of it had scabbed over since the attack; ripping off her limb-the limb that had very nearly killed her-had done some damage, less than they anticipated, but enough for the pain to be bothersome if she stretched the wrong way. Perhaps it was her subconscious trying to erase the memories from her mind, but now, it didn't seem nearly as dangerous as it had been. Perhaps that was her way of coping, and this was his, but regardless, she hated seeing him break down, helpless to bring him back from the brink.

"I could have died," she said gently, carefully going over every word before she spoke. "I could have, but I didn't. Jamison, I'm here, I'm alive. And it's thanks you you that I am."

What she said didn't seem to have an effect, his miserable expression growing more desperate as she spoke. "Ya probably are dead," he continued, shaking his head furiously. "Wouldn't be the first time me head's done this. Be talking t' someone fer weeks before Roadie's told me they died. Radiation fucks with ya, Caterpillar. Fucks with ya bad. But ya can't be dead...ya can't."

His voice cracked, and the noise he made sounded like he was fighting back tears. Junkrat was growing more hysterical by the moment; eyes squeezing shut, his hands dragged down his face, pulling his skin taut, and his shoulders shook violently as he choked out words, repeating them over and over again:

"She's not fuckin' dead."

"Jamison!" At this point, Pilar didn't care if he pushed her away or not. Striding forward, she collapsed on the ground beside him, his entire body shaking by this point. His breathing came in shallow gasps and he was tearing his hair out with the force with which he grabbed it. It might not have done much, and though it was awkward with one arm, she clung to his side, her limb wrapping around his quaking shoulders. For the moment, it did little to ease him; nestling her head against his neck, her hand ran gently along his arm as he continued to mutter angrily, desperately. She had seen him like this before, but never quite to this extent, and it took him minutes to even register she was there, longer so to even begin to stop trembling. His hands had finally released his hair, but even so, his shoulders-and by proximity, Pilar-were covered in blonde strands of dry, frazzled hair.

"Yer real, ain't ya?" he finally croaked, his hand reaching to rest on her arm, almost in disbelief. She felt his fingers trace over her skin, as though committing it to memory, and it took a moment before Pilar drew away, her fingers brushing against his jaw to draw his gaze back to hers. It was then she could see his eyes, the anger, the fear. The madness that radiation had granted him. They were red, bloodshot, and glistening as the demons raged on within him."Yer not dead? My head's not fuckin' with me, is it?"

"I'm real, I'm here," she assured him, but he did not seem convinced. Nose wrinkling, his brows further knitted together, and even her touch on his jaw did not sway him. His eyes, however, spoke otherwise. Even through the madness, she could see the hope glimmer in them at her words. "You can feel me, can't you?"

She was vaguely aware of how he shifted beside her; one hand rested on her hip, the other reaching to touch the sore, empty sockets on her shoulder. His eyes fixed on the raw skin, the sockets that had been put back into place by his own hands. Her eyes closed, brows knitting together as they pained her, and she bit down on her lip, forcing back a whimper as the irritation grew more noticeable. He was curious, he wanted to see, and she wanted to prove to him that this wasn't all an illusion. It took a moment for her eyes to flutter open again, fixing on his, and though there was a tenderness in his eyes that she'd rarely seen, anger soon flickered across his features, remembering what had come to pass. A feral snarl rumbled in his throat, lip curling as she winced while his fingers continued to circle, and suddenly, his brow pressed against hers, growling deeply.

"I'll kill 'em, Caterpillar. I'll kill 'em all. Blow 'em t' pieces." His hands trembled in rage and the longer he thought on it, the more angered he became. Her hand, still nestled against his face, cupped his cheek, her thumb trailing along his cheekbone in attempt to bring him back to her. It did little at first, and Pilar was worried that it would not work, but after a moment, she watched the struggle, shown clearly in his features, as his mind fought against himself, and slowly, he came to, if only for a moment. His eyes fixed on her, and the hand that had touched her shoulder now rested against her face, fingers tangling in her hair, trying to convince himself she was there.

"Ya feel so real, Caterpillar. But so did the others, an' they were dead. So damn dead. I remember 'em being blown t' bits by the omnic bullshit in the Outback. Junkers, too. Friends, dead an' gone. But you...ya can't be...ya can't be…"

Her heart raced, watching him fall back into his own madness, unable to discern reality from hallucinations. At this point, she didn't know what she could do; anything she said didn't seem to help, and he clung to her as though she would disappear at any moment. His desperate muttering grew in urgency and volume, and all he could do was bury his face in her shoulder, trembling as the madness took him.

Pilar almost thought to call Roadhog to them, but Junkrat held so tightly onto her that she couldn't bare to tear herself away from him when he needed her most. And even so, she would not leave him, not like this. She'd stay there all night if she had to, without sleep, if it meant bringing him back from the brink. She cared so damn much for his well-being, for him. God, if she had known where she would have been, months from that first attack in Madrid, she didn't know if she would have believed it. But, god, she didn't regret it, even as Junkrat shook from the horrors of the past, his time in the Outback. If this was any insight as to the consequence of the omnic territory in Australia-the hysteria, the madness, the breakdowns-she could finally begin to understand exactly why these men hated them so.

"This ain't real," he finally groaned, and yet his arms tightened around her, as though holding onto his last remaining link to reality. He slowly drew away, his gaze shifting steadily to Pilar's, his expression changing from angered to confused to distressed all within a matter of seconds. He looked at her as though she had descended from a different place, a celestial being that he simply could not catch. There was almost a childlike awe settled on his features when their eyes locked, and Pilar could feel her stomach whirl about, more forceful than it had ever been before.

Time stopped around her as her heart began to race, and ambient sound about them seemed to quiet altogether. She could not read his expression; while the awe was still ever-present, something else flickered in his eyes, something that sent a shiver down her spine and a deep blush to spread quickly and darkly across her features. Not a word was spoken-not a word could be spoken. Pilar was sufficiently tongue-tied and the grip around her waist did nothing to help. She was unsure as to how long it was they were frozen, but she could steadily feel the blush creep onto her ears and shoulders, all the while a rosy tint settled across his nose and cheeks. Her hand settled on his face, though it trembled greatly as her fingers dragged lightly across his stubbly jaw, and as she watched him closely, comprehension seemed to dawn on his face, a sudden realization that the woman before him, the woman he continuously told himself was dead, was very much alive. It was as though he had an epiphany, feeling her soft fingers trace against his skin...

And suddenly, their lips crashed together with an intensity that had been bottled up for ages. Though he had expected it, Junkrat froze, taken aback by what was actually happening, but hell, it wasn't as though he hadn't thought about it before. In truth, he had thought about it for a while now; while he would probably not admit it anytime soon-not that he needed to, Roadhog had known before he had-he wasn't quite sure when his affection had turned from the friendly sort to something a little more, but shit, he'd lay awake at night, watching her sleep when he couldn't, wondering why she had stayed. He liked to think it was because she liked him, she was opening up to him. He wasn't like the news made them up to be, and by now she knew that, but it was just that he didn't think she'd actually let a train-wreck like him so close to her like this, but hell, was he in for a surprise.

Pilar's head seemed to explode as she acted on impulse, and yet, as her heart continued to race, hand shaking ever so slightly, she didn't give two damns to whether or not she was being foolish. Her eyes fluttered shut and her arm wrapped awkwardly around his shoulder, struggling to support herself without her other limb. Thankfully, he noticed, and not a moment later he shifted, lifting her to better set her upon him, one hand supporting her lower back, the other still tangled in her hair.

Adrenaline flowed through their veins with such vigor that their lips worked flawlessly against each other's, and Pilar's hand tangled in his hair, tugging at his blonde locks roughly. It provoked a growl from him, and his hand slid from her back to her hip, fingers digging into her flesh as he drew her closer, not at all gently. He was hungry for her, and he could only imagine how she felt, but when her chest pressed flush against his, feeling exactly how close she was, how willing she was…

He broke the kiss, and his eyes, blazing in a lustful fervor, met hers before a cocky, lopsided grin lifted his features, his nose and cheeks covered in a bright red blush. She met his gaze with a coy smile of her own, nails scratching circles in his scalp, a giggle falling from her lips before attempting to stop it, but to no avail.

Like a child snuggling his teddy bear, Junkrat buried his face against Pilar's shoulder again, vibrating gleefully when she laughed. She could only hold on tighter, mind in a haze as she came to terms with what had just happened, and try as she might to keep herself calm, she could not help but to wiggle happily in his lap. Perhaps she'd been pining for the idiot a lot longer than she had realized, because even though the kiss had passed, and hearts were calming, her stomach whirled with such an intensity that she very nearly pushed him back down, making him hers once again.

"Was that real enough for you?" she murmured, absentmindedly twirling his hair between her fingers. She could feel him mumbling into her shoulder, words unintelligible, but the wiggling she felt beneath her told her exactly how giddy Junkrat was. After a moment, he shifted himself to better see her, watching her like a puppy as he nuzzled her affectionately. It was a moment before he could find the words, and longer so before he was able to speak them, but the goofy grin plastered across his face was enough to tell Pilar exactly what he thought.

"Yeah, Caterpillar. Yeah, it was."

With a smile, she made to brush her lips against his brow, yet from behind them, a loud, clearing of a throat told them they were far from alone.

Quickly gazing over her shoulder, her eyes widened when her gaze fell upon Roadhog, his massive arms crossed over his chest as the lenses of his mask flashed in their direction. If she wasn't blushing before, Pilar certainly was now, and she could feel it creeping across her shoulders as her gaze pointedly avoided Roadhog's. Junkrat, on the other hand, was ecstatic, vibrating happily beneath her, hoping to grab the man's attention.

"We gotta move," he growled, blatantly ignoring Junkrat, his arm falling to his side while his thumb jerked over his shoulder. From what she could tell, he had packed up most of their belongings in preparation for their next journey. Still, Pilar could see his eyes flashing behind the lenses of his mask, and she could have sworn she'd seen him roll them like a parent, irritated with their children. Junkrat, however, didn't seem no notice, or didn't care, and gathering Roadhog's attention-finally-a shit-eating grin spread across his face as he spoke again.

"Did ya-"

"Yes." He did not bother letting Junkrat finish his question, and he strode forward, lifting them both, as easily as rag-dolls, by the arms. "Cops are searching, probably for whoever was behind Salamanca, maybe us. Gotta lay low-and quiet."

Roadhog did not stay longer; having just witnessed the two idiots finally do what he'd been waiting for them to do for ages now, he was in no hurry to spend every waking moment with them, now that they got that out of the way. Hell, Junkrat had been affectionate enough as it was, both toward he and Pilar; he did not want to stick around and see how it would be, now.

"Awkward, eh?" Junkrat grinned cheekily, once Roadhog was out of earshot, yellow eyes flashing toward Pilar. "Maybe next time, the lug won't catch us."

She glanced up at him, eyes bright, her face positively glowing. "Maybe, maybe not," she replied with a nonchalant shrug, and her hand came to rest on the back of her neck, rubbing it slightly, sheepishly. Part of her wondered if it had been real, but the smug grin that rested on his face told her that it completely had been. She bit her lip coyly, and after a moment, her hand wrapped around his wrist, and she dragged him along, back to Roadhog's bike, before he ended up leaving without them.

"Let's get out of here."