Sunrise

Chapter 18: Scars

Scars—Papa Roach

AGAIN! If you want to see some scene from this story or Moonrise in someone else's POV, take Matt's POV during the time that Cara left, or Alice when she realized that she couldn't see Cara. Something like that. TELL ME. Thanks.

OOO

"You can sing?" Jaime asked as the song ended. I broke from my trance of gazing out the window, nodding.

"Yeah. One of my families was a pair of chorus teachers. Crazy life, eh?"

"Yup."

There was an awkward silence then as we drove. Another song came on the radio, and I quickly shut it off. Love songs weren't exactly doing it for me right now. Jaime glanced in my direction—not exactly discreetly—as he switched lanes, and I sunk lower in my seat.

A silver Volvo whipped past us, suddenly, and I shot up from my seat, eyes wide. "Man that freak is driving like a maniac!" Jaime exclaimed at the same time I shouted: "Holy shit!" I was glad Alex wasn't in the car.

"What?" Jaime asked me, squinting at the Volvo that was far ahead of us by now.

"Th-that's my father's car," I spluttered. "And he just drove by? What the—,"

It got really quiet, my impending rage and Jaime's complete disbelief adding to the tension. "Oh, my god," I said, my voice more even then I could think. "I cannot believe what just happened."

"That was… weird, alright."

Five minutes later we pulled into the driveway, and I jumped from the huge SUV and stomped into the house, forgetting about all the groceries we'd bought. Freesia glanced up from another magazine, and opened her mouth to say something. I cut her off with a frustrated yell.

"Uh… okay. May I ask?"

"No," I told her, walking past her and up the stairs. I startled Mr. Momo as I fell back onto her bed and stared relentlessly at the ceiling. I got it, now. I totally got it.

My family was the ones watching my minipack.

Of course.

There was a meow to the side of my face, and then Mr. Momo was staring at me, pawing my stomach. Then she laid down on it and curled up, and I petted her absently. "I have to go home soon, you know. People are probably starting to get worried."

There was a commotion downstairs, and I catapulted down the steps. It sounded good—I couldn't miss it. What I saw was Alex slamming into Jaime, knocking him to the ground. Man, that kid was strong, even if Jaime was letting him.

I laughed, and clapped my hand over my mouth almost immediately. I hadn't laughed in a while—smiled? Sure. Laughed? No. It felt so foreign, and that only made me more upset. I'd even laughed as an orphan, but I can't laugh as a delinquent from a prison? That was just… wrong.

Jaime and I shared another look, and I was starting to freak. "Jaime… could I speak to you?"

"Of course."

I dragged Jaime outside, where the pack couldn't hear us.

We stood, staring at each other for the longest time. Then I spoke, and my voice was filled with restraint. "You know I need to leave soon." I'd already been there for four days.

"Why?" he asked innocently. "I don't trust you with a car."

I stared at him, very close to glaring. "Just becase I've had two car accidents that basically resulted in my near death—and one incident of flying of your dad's motorcycle—does not mean I'm a bad driver." My words were really that believeable, but hey, they made sense to me. "And I think you're forgetting one minuscule detail," I added, a bit peeved now.

He noticed my change in mood. When he spoke, his voice was calm, but his eyes were frustrated. "Oh? What's that?"

"I can't die!" I exploded. "It's kinda along the lines of impossible unless some other freak like me decides to come along, tear me to shreds, and set a lighter to me. And then there's that race that can tear me apart with their teeth, but hell, I'm pretty sure you know about that! I mean, I was even adopted by them once—oh, and look at that! You're my brother!"

"And you are insane," Jaime growled. I kept glaring at him, my anger almost at boiling point. Insane? Yeah, I think I understood that. After all—I was seeing my captor everywhere I went.

"I don't think you get it," I enunciated, each word slow and deliberate. "Every night I have a nightmare of what happened less than two weeks ago. Sure, as my other half, I could just not sleep. But I can't be my other half. Why? Because I might accidentally eat my younger brother! I don't think you have the slightest idea what happened to me for seven months, Jaime." I yanked down the collar of my shirt, exposing the right side of my neck, where the scar gleamed red, jagged, and irritated. It constantly burned me, literally. "The thing is infected with my kind's venom. It's kind of like rattlesnake poison, only a thousand times worse. Even when I turn back into my real self, it'll still be there. My immortality can't heal that kind of wound.

"And to elaborate on those nightmares," I continued, my laugh angry and bitter, "do you know what it's like to remember everything horrible that has ever happened to you in crystal clear context? Say your best friend dying in your arms, or maybe, just maybe, running away from one of the places I was actually happy? Trying to run away from those memories only made them worse, alright? And I'm sick and tired of dreaming them over and over again. Sick and tired of reliving every damn thing that has ever made me feel guilty in the past.

"I'm sick and tired of remembering how I treated my family. Sick and tired of knowing how my lover is reacting to my leave. I'm sick and tired of knowing what a horrible person I am, okay?" I felt tears sting my eyes and pushed them back, but one escaped and slid down my cheek, bitingly cold in the frigid air. "And I know they're watching me, thinking they should give me space. But, they're kind of obvious about it, you know? They aren't exactly the best spies in the world—or at least they're not trying to. And I know my family thinks I have… issues with them. Why else would I run away—to the Volturi, I might add—and make myself invisible to Alice? Why else would I not come back as I left my locket in Matt's room? Why else would I not come back again as soon as I got out of that goddamn prison? Or maybe after I dropped Alex off?

"What do you think they think, Jaime?" I asked, fixing him with a stare. "Do they think I'm some ungrateful kid who just wanted to hang out with her brother before she bothered to assure her family she was alright?"

Jaime let out a gust of breath at my pause. "That's enough," he interjected before I could continue. "Come inside before you freeze and let me explain something that seems to have escaped that stubborn head of yours."

"I'm not going to freeze," I mumbled dejectedly, even though the cold was biting at my eyes and cheeks. My chest hurt from my outburst, and the tear that slid down my cheek was mocking me as it froze. "I can't die."

He rolled his eyes. "Just come inside," he sighed, and since common sense was starting to dawn on me, I followed him. We walked back to the parlor—one of the only clean places in the House of Jaime—and sat across from each other.

"Okay," I sighed, annoyed. "What the hell is it?"

"Language—"

My mind flashed back to Lucas, and I clenched my teeth. "Please, don't ever say that to me again."

He got the picture. "I wanted to tell you that just after you left for Italy, your entire family burst through the clearing. They bombarded me with questions. Edward demanded me to tell him the truth when I kept thinking: Zimbabwe, over and over again. You're aunt, Alice, was pretty much devastated that she couldn't 'see' where the hell you were. They don't think you hate them, Cara. They did think that you'd ran away, but they sure didn't hate you."

"Scent?" I demanded.

"They could smell some other vampires, ones they knew, but your captors had used something to cover up their scent. The Cullens had no idea who it was." He paused while I took it in. "So… sorry."

I blinked. I had been curious—although relieved—that my family hadn't come running after me, "It would have been… difficult if they'd followed me," I said aloud, not looking at my Hispanic brother. I pulled my knees into my chest and rested my chin on them.

"Just stay for a couple more days," he said finally.

I stared at him again, uncomprehending. "I want to be home for Christmas, Jaime, and in case you haven't noticed, my parents have been giving me not-too-subtle hints about their presence. Also, I miss Matt! I haven't seen him in a year, Jaime—haven't seen my family in two and a half. I need to go."

"Who's Matt?" he asked suddenly. "You keep talking about him in your sleep, you slip up in sentences sometimes… who is he?"

I realized I hadn't told Jaime about Matt, and now he was staring at me, arms crossed, with that all-knowing look of his.

"My… lover." But that sounded to sex-based, so I added, "Slashroomieslashboyfriendslashcaretakerslashboss."

I had said it all extremely quickly, a blue of words. If I could, I would've said fiancée or something that provided commitment. But Jaime was very close to laughing right now, and I knew he'd caught every word. "So you're hooking up with your boss," he said. "Wow, Cara. Risqué."

"Not funny. I'm being serious."

He sighed. "I know, I'm sorry. Just stick around for two more days, okay? Then I promise I'll give you money for the first ticket out of here."

"Why two more days?"

"Tonight, I'd really love you forever if you babysat Alex for me." At my look of contempt and disbelief, he added, "I've got a gig tonight with the band, and I think Alex doesn't really… trust people anymore, so I can't hire a babysitter."

"Is the babysitter a vampire?" I asked blankly.

"Well, no. But Cara, come on. Two nights! You can leave after forty-two hours, exactly." He gave me the puppy dog eyes, and I rolled my eyes.

"Promise?"

"Absolutely. Promise."

"Fine," I huffed.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you!" He cried, hugging me senseless. I pushed him off me, grumbling my discontentedness. He only laughed and mussed my short hair. I glared at him as he finished, "You won't regret it. I promise."

"My only prize is brotherly love. Big whoop. Don't I get cash?"

He shook his head. "I'm paying for your flight. Calm down. Forty-eight hours."

"More like forty-seven hours and fifty-eight minutes," I replied, grinning. He punched my shoulder and asked:

"Who was that guy who you decked in the school parking lot by the way?" He looked past me, remembering. "Did you ever figure it out?"

"Yeah, I did."

"Who was it?" Jaime repeated.

I shook my head. "If you want revenge or something, that's not gonna happen." I paused again.

"Why not?"

"It was Lucas."

OOO

"So, remember: Avatar comes on at eight, mac and cheese is on the menu, then put in some movie for him to watch after Avatar is over, and then his bed time is—"

"Eight-thirty." I had cut him off, tapping my head and adding: "Yeah, I know all this. Kinda the point of my power."

"Sorry, just playing the role of big brother." He smiled grimly at me. "Oh yeah! And he's gonna read comics, so make sure the light is turned off…"

Even though Jaime was technically younger than me, I'd never really felt over-protective of him. It may have been because he was a guy, but I doubted that. I think it was because he already had it covered. It was a lot to handle, I realized later. Watching out for your older sister, your younger brother (both of which had nearly been killed… a couple times), and on top of all that, you found out you were a werewolf. Oh, can't forget college either, or the band, or the part time job to pay for the equipment for the band.

Sometimes I really felt bad for Jaime. He needed an extra hand around every once in a while. I'd see that through.

"…he's going to need a bath, too, so make sure he takes it. I don't want—"

"Okay, Jaime. I've got it. Just go, alright? And remember to actually have some fun, comprendo?"

"Right. Bye sis, bye bro."

"Bye," we resounded.

As soon as the door shut, Alex and I turned to each other with evil grins on our faces. "You ready to have some real fun?" I asked, grinning. Alex caught my drift.

"Absolutely," he agreed, scanning the schedule. "But the activities on this… abomination don't fit the definition of 'fun', exactly."

I grinned wider. "You're positively correct. So what do we do about it?"

"Throw it in the fire?" Alex asked excitedly.

"Rip it to shreds?" I shot off.

"Hold it over the snapping jaws of and angry shark?"

"Feed it to the cat?"

"Tie it to a pigeon?"

"Flush it down the toilet?"

"Sit… on it?" Alex asked after a moment, our conversation coming to a halt.

I thought for a moment. "Dear Sir, I do believe we've run out of ideas."

"And I do believe you're right, Old Chap," he consented.

"Just curious, but how did you plan on getting a shark?" I glanced at him suspiciously, frowning my disapproval.

"Shark?" he asked innocently. "Who said shark?"

I scowled playfully, grabbing his hands and twirling with him down the hall. He laughed and I sat him in a chair at the counter. "So what do you want to do? Anything and everything. The sky's the limit."

"We could… play some videogames," he suggested lamely.

"That works, too."

After an hour of slaughtering and hacking zombies' sorry heads off, I was blasting music from Jaime's computer while I cooked dinner. Macaroni and cheese. I was using the spoon as a microphone, singing my guts out and dancing like I was on something. I was having fun.

"If I go crazy,

Then will you still call me Superman?

If I'm alive and well,

Will you be there,

A holdin' my hand?

I'll keep you by my side

With my Superhuman,

My Kryptonite!"

"Guitar solo!" Alex yelled, getting down on both knees and jamming out on his air guitar. I laughed, throwing my head back and stirring the mac and cheese.

"Okay, okay. How about we crank it up with some backstreet boys?"

It was interesting, that night, to eat Mac and Cheese, chill with my kid brother, and watch a cartoon with people who could bend the elements. And after that, we watched a movie with blood, guts, at the most amount of gore I'd seen in a really long time. I doubted Jaime would approve, but that's just what made it all the more awesome. I mean, I wasn't corrupting the kid's mind or anything. If he could survive prison, he could survive a horror movie.

Then it was just me on the couch alone, flipping through an album I'd found under Jaime's desk. Caroline was in most of the pictures of when he was younger. She was lanky and tall, even awkward looking—but the thing was that she held herself with confidence. And then there were pictures of all three kids, and Alex was just a baby. And then, I flipped the page again, and it was just Jaime and Alex. No Caroline. And eventually, the pictures began to slow, a long period of time stretched between each photo. I could see Alex age and Jaime grow more serious, and then there was one picture snuck in sloppily between Alex and Jaime at ages eight and sixteen and one of them at ages seventeen (or eighteen, I was guessing) and nine.

The photo was of me and Jaime, beating each other's asses at a video game. I was deep in concentration, my fingers a blur against the buttons, but Jaime had taken a swift glance at the camera (which Alex was holding) and grinned triumphantly. Ironically, I had beat him seconds later because his attention had been diverted, and I'd smashed up his team.

I felt my chest constrict as I looked behind another picture, and this one was of me and Jaime arm wrestling, and I have to admit—I beat his sorry ass again. Probably my surfacing vampire strength.

Then there was another photo—one Maria had made us take when we'd gotten to the new house in Montana. I had Alex hiked up on my hip grinning at the camera in that exasperated way. And Alex was smiling from ear to ear. Jaime was leaning against one of the pillars on the front porch, an amused expression on his face. He was nice about it though. Humoring his mother.

"Cara!"

The scared voice came from the hallway, and I snapped the book shut and glanced to it. Alex was running down the stairs as fast as his little legs could carry him. I stuffed the scrapbook underneath the desk and sat in shock as Alex stopped in the doorway, heaving.

Maybe the movie wasn't such a good idea after all.

"Cara!" he yelled again, and I winced, leaning back in my seat.

"What? What's wrong?"

He scooted closer to me, glaring out of the window to my right. "Th-there was this guy, Cara! He was outside my window! And he was huge!"

My chest clenched. "What?" I asked. "Slow down. Are you sure it wasn't a nightmare? That movie was pretty scary."

"No!" He shook his head. "I promise it wasn't!"

"Okay, then," I muttered, getting up and walking him to the living room. "Can you describe him?" I sat him down against me, stroking his hair as he latched onto my arm.

"He was tall, and pale," my brother began, and my body clenched in fear. Crap. "And he was huge! He had these humongous muscles—bigger than Jaime!"

"Everyone's muscles are bigger than Jaime's," I chuckled.

"And he had really dark, curly hair and he was, like, huge!"

Something clicked then. "Emmett," I hissed.

"What?"

"My uncle!" I grumbled angrily. "Oh, my god. If you're going to spy on me, you might as well talk to me!" I yelled to no one in particular. Alex let go of my arm and scooted away as I stood up, pacing. "Do you know why he was there?" I asked Alex.

"Are you kidding me? I wasn't going to stay and wait for him to eat me!"

I stopped pacing, glancing at Alex. Our movie had been Silence of the Lambs—about Hannibal the Cannibal. No wonder Alex thought people wanted to eat him. "He wasn't going to eat you," I assured him. "He was probably trying to see if I was with you."

Alex rolled his eyes. "Well I'm not going back to my room. It's on the second floor—Jaime was always telling me: 'No one can reach you up there, you're perfectly safe'," he mocked. "Yeah right!"

"Vampires are really strong, Alex. Normal people can't scale walls and stuff."

"Vampire?" he squeaked. I shot a glance at him; he was wrapped in a blanket, his eyes wide.

I huffed, crossing my arms. "I said he was my uncle, didn't I?"

"Well, yeah—"

"And I'm a vampire, right?"

He shook his head rapidly, and I felt a bit bad for the poor kid. "You're not right now! You're human. –Ish," he added.

"Well, okay. What about Maddie? You didn't have problems with her."

"Yeah, but I know Maddie, and I know you. I don't know…" Gulp. "Emmett."

I rolled my eyes, smiling in spite of myself. "Okay, you can chill with me. Turn on avatar or something. I'm gonna go get a snack from the freezer outside."

"Kay," he agreed, already flipping through the channels. I walked into the garage, and outside, leaning against the wall.

"Emmett!" I hissed, feeling stupid.

But then there was a gust of wind, and my uncle was standing in front of me. "Hey, kiddo!" He said, reaching forward and ruffling my hair. I squirmed out from under, glaring at him. I opened my mouth to reproach him, but he held a finger to his lips. "Shh, Cara. If Edward finds out I'm here—"

"Which reminds me," I growled. "Why have you guys been avoiding me?"

"Edward thinks it's for the best, of course. 'Give her space. She needs time to forget'," he mocked. "Of course, he's also a dumbass for getting Carlisle to agree to that."

"How is everybody?" I asked softly.

He ran a hand over his face, saying, "Alice and Jasper were going nuts, you know. Alice with the visions, Jasper because she was going nuts. Obviously, so were you're parents, and Rose and I too. Carlisle and Esme were—well, everyone was worried sick. We looked for you all over, but we couldn't find you. It was as if he'd gotten on of his minions to put a shield on something. We don't know what happened, but we looked where you were—and it was as if the prison wasn't even there."

"Weird," I allowed. He nodded.

Emmett grinned. "I missed you, kiddo. Everyone did."

I pushed back the tears in my eyes. I still didn't want to be all weak and annoying. "Me too, Emmett."

He hugged me ruffling my hair one last time, and then he said, "I better get back before Edward walks in the door and reads Alice's mind. Bye."

"Bye."

I walked back to the living room and plopped down on the sofa beside Alex, watching that Aang dude beat up some sorry fire dude's ass. (Wow, did I need to stop bonding with the TV, or what?)

I just hoped Jaime wouldn't freak when he smelled vampire on his doorstep.

OOO

I originally had plans of this chapter being about twice this size. But, I realized it was too long for you guys to wait, and so I tweaked it a bit.

Oh, and if you had tried to sign my guestbook on my website earlier, I'm sorry I didn't realize that it was members only. I changed it, so if you have a song you'd like to see in an outtake of your choice, go ahead and leave it there. Also, thank you to all who DID sign the guestbook.

--not edited. Sorry. I don't have time. The superbowl's tonight and I gotta clean.

Hope ya like,

Jamie