Chapter 7 – The Death and Rebirth of the Moon
The Avatar's blast of air pushed the soldiers into the lake with a splash.
The air bison flew over their heads, and landed on the island in front of the pond. The Avatar and Sokka leap off to confront Zhao.
Katara gasped, and rushed over the bridge to join them. Zuko hesitantly followed her, resisting the urge to simply snatch her up and take her away somewhere safe. Zhao was here in the Oasis, which meant that the siege had begun and there was nowhere safe left in the Northern Water Tribe anyway.
Katara stood by the Avatar, Zuko hovered behind them uncertainly, and the soldiers climbed out of the lake to stand by Zhao.
The standoff was tense; Zuko had never seen the Avatar so serious before.
"Don't bother," called Zhao coldly, holding a threatening fist up to the squirming cloth bag.
"Zhao, don't!" cried the Avatar, dropping his staff and holding his hands up in a placating manner.
"It's my destiny to destroy moon, and the Water Tribe!" insisted Zhao. His eyes were wide and maniacal. Zuko thought there was no reasoning with him, he was too far-gone into his delusions of grandeur, but the Avatar tried anyway.
"Destroying the moon won't just hurt the Water Tribe. It will hurt everyone, including you. Without the moon, everything would fall out of balance. You have no idea what kind of chaos that would unleash on the world!" he cried earnestly.
"He's right Zhao."
Zuko turned around in surprise. It was Iroh crossing the second bridge. His yellow eyes were narrowed, and fixed unblinkingly on Zhao.
He came to a halt between the two groups.
"General Iroh? Why am I not surprised to discover your treachery?"
"I'm no traitor Zhao!"
Zuko staggered back as his Uncle's words reverberated through his head,
I'm no traitor Zhao!
I'm no traitor Zhao!
I'm no traitor Zhao!
Zuko could not honestly say the same about himself. Iroh had said just hours earlier that he thought of Zuko as his own… would he still feel that way if he found out that Zuko was a traitor? If he found out that Zuko was putting the interests of a water tribe girl above his own people?
This was much worse than speaking out of turn at a war meeting. Would Iroh challenge him to an Agni Kai? His gut told him no, but then again his thirteen year old self never would have thought his father would burn half his face off, and it had happened.
"The Firenation needs the moon too. We all depend on the balance. Whatever you do to that spirit, I'll unleash on you tenfold! Let it go! Now!" Zuko rarely heard his Uncle use that voice, the authoritative tone of a General of the Fire Nation Army.
Iroh took up a strong aggressive stance that made the men behind Zhao shift uncomfortably. It reminded Zuko that although Iroh was his jolly tea-loving Uncle, he was also the Dragon of the West.
Zhao's face went oddly blank, and he knelt to release the fish back into the pond.
For a moment, the moon went back to shining with its usual pearly luminescence, but then Zhao's face twisted into something dark and ugly. He lashed out violently, setting the surface of the pond alight with the force of his blow.
The color seemed to leach out of the world around him as the light of the moon was extinguished. Being a firebender, Zuko had never really given the moon very much thought previously, but to see it disappear from the sky without a trace so completely… it was horrifying.
Iroh made good on his threat and sprang into action immediately, attacking with the ferocity that took Zhao's men off guard. He made short work of the four firebenders, but Zhao managed to slip away in the commotion.
No one bothered following him, instead gathering in front of the pond.
A white koi fish floated belly up in the center of the pond, and it was covered in sickeningly charred welts. The remaining black koi fish flitted around its dead fellow's body frantically. It was an oddly heart-breaking sight.
Iroh reached out and gently lifted the dead koi fish out of the water. He looked unbearably sad.
"There is no hope left," said the girl with white hair, tears falling thick and heavy down her cheeks.
Sokka put a comforting hand on her shoulder, looking uncharacteristically solemn, and she threw herself into his embrace.
The Avatar was unnaturally still, eyes emotionlessly fixed on the remaining black koi fish.
Zuko focused on Katara's face... she looked devastated. Because of Zhao, she would never be able to bend again. Zuko thought about how he would feel if the sun suddenly went out forever…
Devastated didn't even begin to cover it.
He spun on his heel and marched away from the group decisively.
Zuko didn't know what to do about the clash between his feelings for Katara and his feelings towards his nation and regaining his honor, but he did know that both warring halves of himself were calling for Zhao to receive justice.
He left the oasis and gave chase. Every step he took away from Katara brought back the ache in his chest, but he ignored it.
As he ran through the city this time, it wasn't asleep. The battle was well underway and what Zuko saw unsettled him greatly.
There were bodies floating face down in the canals. There were firenation men frozen solid in blocks of ice and watertribe men writhing in agony from burns that were still smouldering.
Watertribe men fled desperately from platoons of firebenders, unable to defend themselves because the moon was gone, and along with it their bending.
The stench of charred flesh was heavy on the wind, and blood stained the snow. It occurred to Zuko that that it was all red, no matter what nation it had spilled from.
Deep down Zuko had already known, but it was confirmed for him that he had no appetite for war or violence. The screams and grunts of men in pain filled the frigid night air, and Zuko felt sick to his stomach.
It was more proof of how weak and pathetic he was, which made him irrationally angry at himself for not being stronger, and angry at Zhao for invading the Northern Water Tribe in the first place and condoning the bloodshed.
He had to take a circuitous route to avoid being caught up in the relentless push forward of the Firenation troops, running along roof tops and leaping across canals.
When he finally caught up with Zhao, they had crossed most of the city, and they were very close to the icy outer wall.
Well, what was left of it.
Zuko could see its lumpy remains in the distance, and beyond that, Zhao's fleet on the smooth surface of the ocean.
Zhao was on a wide balcony, looking for a way to climb down. Zuko cut him off with a fireball, which smashed into the balustrade.
"You!" Zhao said it like an oath.
"You tried to have me killed!" bellowed Zuko, leaping down onto the balcony, punching fire balls at Zhao. Zhao managed to dodge out of the way, and Zuko's fire blew up some decorative pots, throwing dust up into the air.
"Yes I did!" admitted Zhao proudly, "You're the Blue Spirit, an enemy of the Firenation. You freed the Avatar!"
"I had no choice!"
"You should have chosen to accept your disgrace," Zhao undid the clasp of his cape and it fluttered to the ground, "Then at least you could have lived!"
Zhao was a powerful bender, but Zuko was quick and agile. They exchanged blows, Zhao lashing out forcefully, Zuko flipping and darting out of the way.
Out of the corner of his eye, Zuko spotted a flash of light and colour streaking down the main watercourse towards the ocean, but he purposefully put it out of his mind to focus on fighting.
Zhao was not as good at ignoring the distraction, and he faltered for a moment, allowing Zuko to get under his defenses and push him off balance. He toppled off the balcony on to the roof of another building below.
With no hesitation, Zuko jumped down to follow him.
Zhao landed with a thud on his back, and let out a pained grunt.
Zuko broke his own fall with a somersault, and rolled smoothly back to his feet, advancing on Zhao with his arms poised for attack. From his position on the ground, Zhao threw up a wall of flames.
Zuko halted his advance to dissipate the fire, which gave Zhao the chance to scramble back to his feet.
He immediately turned tail and ran away.
"You coward! Come back here and face me!" yelled Zuko, giving chase.
Zhao jumped off the roof and landed on one of the many bridges that crossed the main waterway below.
Zuko followed, leaping off the roof and bringing his leg down in a powerful arc to create a firewhip.
Zhao turned at the last moment and blocked.
"You stupid little boy," he spat, "I have better things to do than to be fighting you, but if you want to die so badly, fine!"
The fight was back on, and Zhao was not pulling any punches. He fought viciously and angrily, but Zuko was angrier, fueled by righteous wrath.
They exchanged blows, both of them relentlessly pouring anger into their punches, but while Zhao's anger was hot and chaotic, Zuko's was cold and controlled.
As Zhao's blows became more wild and erratic, Zuko's became more accurate and precise.
Eventually Zhao's defense slipped, and he overbalanced backwards. Zuko stood over him, breathing hard, hesitating about what he should do now that he had Zhao at his mercy.
"No! It can't be!" screamed Zhao, snapping Zuko out of his internal struggle.
Despite his better judgement, Zuko risked a glance over his shoulder to see what had so unnerved Zhao. The moon was back, restored to her full glory.
Suddenly, giant glowing fingers of water reached over either side the bridge, and began to bend over their heads like furling flower petals. Zuko could hear the anguished roar of the ocean resonating from the fingers, and an unearthly light seemed to animate the water from within.
Thinking fast, Zuko managed to dive roll out of the way.
Zhao was not so lucky; he was enveloped in their embrace.
The watery fingers tightened their grip, forming a giant fist and lifting Zhao clear off the bridge.
Zuko reacted instinctively.
"Take my hand!" he leap onto the balustrade of the bridge, stretching his arm out as far as possible.
But Zhao refused to accept his help.
The look on Zhao's face as the spirit carried him away would stick with Zuko for the rest of his life. It was disdain, superiority, and hatred all rolled into one. Zhao hated him so much, he thought Zuko was so worthless, that he would rather die than take his hand.
Something about that rankled deeply, but Zuko just felt sad.
He wasn't sure how long he stood on that bridge, staring down at the murky water that Zhao had disappeared into… He was just too weary to do anything.
He only moved when he heard the low tone of the air bison approaching. He could tell Katara was on Appa without looking, he could feel traitorous warmth spreading though his chest at her nearness, replacing the numbness and the ache in his chest.
The sky bison passed over his head, and continued towards the outer wall. It began descending, and then Zuko lost sight of it.
Suddenly his chest ached keenly, making him double over in pain and surprise.
Somehow he knew instinctively that Katara was upset.
He followed the tug in his gut until he found himself on what must have been the main battlefield. Firenation tanks lay abandoned in the snow, gleaming lethally under the restored light of the full moon.
The ground was littered with dropped helmets, weapons, and bodies.
Trudging through the snow, Zuko was suddenly struck by how wasteful and pointless this attack was.
He couldn't in good conscious blame the Avatar, because it turned out that Zhao had really invaded in order to kill the moon spirit and destroy all waterbenders.
How was that supposed to add to the glory to the Firenation? How was wiping out another nation supposed to spread their greatness to the rest of the world?
From what he'd seen, the Water Tribe had things under control anyway. They didn't need Firenation help, they had tamed their harsh environment on their own.
It was an unprovoked, unnecessary attack, and now he was walking past dead men. Some of them didn't look much older than he did, and all of them had been sacrificed on the altar of Zhao's ambition and greed.
He spotted Sokka first, gripping a man from behind and dragging him backwards through the snow towards the bison.
Katara was a little further away leaning over another man, a familiar blue glow emanating from where she was touching him.
It appeared that the siblings had stumbled upon a group of survivors that hadn't managed to fall back into the city when the moon had first died.
Zuko approached Katara, but then he reared back in dismay when he saw the extent of the injuries she was trying to heal.
One of the man's arms was gone, he was covered in burns, and there was a deep charred hole in the middle of his abdomen.
Zuko could hardly believe he was still alive.
Sokka was trying to pull the man up onto the bison when he finally noticed Zuko's presence.
"Zuko!" he exclaimed in surprise. He seemed to struggle internally with himself, and his mouth opened and closed several times before he finally spoke again.
"Help me get this guy up here," he eventually demanded. His blue eyes belied the forcefulness of his tone, they were pleading.
Without a word, Zuko walked over and lifted the man's legs. Together he and Sokka maneuvered the man onto Appa's saddle.
He had nasty burns covering his torso, and he whimpered pitifully in pain as they moved his limp body.
They repeated the process for six more men who were still alive, all of them with an assortment of very vicious burns. The kind of burn that went so deep that the nerves were killed, rendering the whole area numb.
The kind of burn you got from fighting firebenders.
He managed to keep himself together long enough to help Sokka lift the last man into place, but then he scrambled off the bison, fell to his knees in the snow, and threw up.
Everything he'd seen that day seemed to hit him at once, the bodies, Zhao, the burns.
It was too much, too close, too raw. He remembered the searing pain of his own burn, the smell, the fear. He remembered the fevered delirium, being in a fog of agony for days. That was what awaited these men.
After he managed to stop retching, Zuko looked up to see that Sokka was frowning at him thoughtfully, like he was trying to solve a difficult puzzle.
Zuko forced himself to his feet and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand brusquely.
"What?" he snapped irritably, embarrassed at having been caught in a vulnerable moment.
"Just surprised that you're human after all," replied Sokka simply, walking past Zuko to go to his sister.
"Katara, we need to fly these guys up to the healing huts," he murmured gently, kneeling down beside her. He gently placed a hand on her shoulder.
"We can't move him yet, and if I stop this he'll die," replied Katara stubbornly, not taking her eyes off her glowing water. She shrugged Sokka's hand off her shoulder.
Zuko and Sokka exchanged a glance. Both of them could clearly see what Katara was refusing to acknowledge; the man was doomed. His injuries were too extensive, too deep. Her healing water hardly seemed to be having an effect, and his breath was coming in catches. He was in the midst of his death throes.
Neither of them could bring themselves to point this out to her. It wouldn't do any good, she would insist on trying until the very end.
"I don't want to leave you here by yourself, but if I don't get those other men help…"
"I'll stay with her," said Zuko quietly. Sokka gave him a hard look.
"Right, because thinking about my baby sister alone with you is supposed to make me feel a whole lot better huh?" he snapped sarcastically.
Zuko shrugged helplessly.
"Go Sokka, I'll be fine," urged Katara.
Sokka huffed in frustration, clearly conflicted about what he should do.
"Ok fine, but as soon as I drop these guys off, I'm coming straight back for you."
He addressed Zuko next, stepping well into his personal space and narrowing his eyes.
Zuko noticed that they were red and puffy, as if he'd been crying.
"She better be okay when I come back, or else," he threatened, staring into Zuko's eyes steadily.
"I won't hurt her," replied Zuko sincerely. He wanted to add that he would protect her with his life, but he had a funny feeling that would come across as laying it on too thick, even though it was true.
Sokka gave him a hard penetrating glare, before visibly deflating and sighing in defeat.
"For some reason I believe you."
With that, he turned away and jogged over the air bison, as if he was trying to leave before he changed his mind. He climbed up, Zuko heard him exclaim "Yip yip," and then they were gone.
Zuko edged as near as he dared to Katara, and stood guard watchfully.
She was getting progressively more frantic as the man slipped further and further out of her grasp, bending more and more water around his body, until his whole torso was engulfed in a glowing wreath.
"No no no no, come on! You can't!" she cried in anguish.
The man gave out one last rattling breath, and then he lay still, his blue eye open and unseeing. He was gone.
"No, please, I-I can heal you…" Katara continued applying her water to the man's wounds heedlessly.
"Katara, you need to stop," said Zuko softly, crouching down beside her.
"No, I just need more time-" her voice broke and the water she was controlling splashed to the ground.
She tried to gather it back up to continue, but her hands were shaking too much.
"That's enough, there isn't anything you can do for him anymore-"
"No, y-you're wrong!"
"Katara, he's dead," he tried to say it gently, but he'd never had any practice at sugar-coating.
"I can fix him…" she insisted weakly, trying desperately to calm her shaking hands enough to coat them with water again.
The meagre beads of water she managed to gather splashed to the ground once more, and this time Katara didn't try to bend again.
Gently but firmly, Zuko gripped her wrists and pulled her to her feet. She responded to his guidance limply and unprotestingly, allowing him to draw her away from the dead man.
He let go of her to go back and crouch beside the man - boy, he looked no older than Zuko himself- and he gently nudged his eyes closed, whispering a quick blessing under his breath.
May your spirit find peace in the next world.
He stood and bowed low over the body; left fist pressed to his right palm, and paid his respects.
Behind him, Katara was sniffing. He returned to her side to find her eyes downcast and brimming with tears. As she looked up at him, they spilled over.
The sight of tears on her cheeks twisted Zuko up horribly on the inside, and he automatically reached up towards her face. This time she didn't flinch away, and he wiped her tears away carefully using his thumb. The skin of her cheek was chilled.
Suddenly, as if the flood gates had been opened, sobs wracked her small frame. The sound of it pierced Zuko's heart and made his chest ache. The ache in his chest screamed at him to comfort her.
Very hesitantly, afraid to startle or upset her even more, Zuko stepped closer and loosely wrapped his arms around her shoulders.
She threw her arms around his waist, clinging to him like he was a life preserver.
It felt… right to hold her like this, as if all the time he'd spent over the past three years honing his body and sharpening his skills was just for this moment, to shelter her. A calm blissfulness settled over his mind and body at her nearness.
"My f-fault, its all my fault," she sobbed.
Haltingly, Zuko tried to mimic her action from earlier, rubbing slow circles on her back with one hand. He stroked her hair with the other.
"Shh, no it isn't," he soothed.
"It is. Master P-Pakku said Kassuq could fight if he beat m-me at sparring and I l-let him win. He shouldn't have been here!"
"If anyone is to blame it's Zhao, for killing the moon. Kassuq was willing to fight to protect his home. He died with honor. Don't diminish his sacrifice."
"I should have been able to heal him!" she cried.
"You did your best Katara," he said softly.
They stood like that for a while, her sobbing and him comforting. Eventually she quietened and her shoulders stopped heaving, and then she suddenly stiffened in his embrace.
Zuko quickly released his hold on her to allow her to wriggle away.
She backed up so there was a meter between them, and stared at him with sad, wet, blue eyes. Zuko itched to gather her back up, to smooth crease between her brows, but he held himself still.
"You... You've been acting so strangely! Tell me what happened on the beach. Now," she demanded desperately.
Zuko swallowed nervously. He didn't want to talk about it, but he couldn't deny her anything she asked of him.
"After… after I finished the firebending form, I… I tried to destroy your necklace," Zuko had to look away in shame, "It - it represented a gateway to the spirit world and destroying it was supposed to banish the spirit back to where it belonged. Something - your brother - hit me in the head and distracted me for a moment, and the spirit had the chance to… to…" thinking about it put him back in the moment, when the spirit reached into his chest and ripped a part of him out…
"Zuko?"
Katara's voice brought him back to himself.
She took one of his hands in both of hers, and he noticed that his hand was trembling in her grip.
"What did the spirit do to you?" she asked emphatically.
"She – it… it stabbed me – right here," Zuko placed his other hand in the center of his chest shakily, "At first I – I thought I was okay because it passed right through, but then I-I felt something tear. I managed to break your necklace after that and the spirit disappeared, but ever since then I've… I've…" he didn't know how to put how he felt into words.
"You haven't been the same," finished Katara softly, "You helped me, you helped Sokka just now, and you didn't try to capture Aang when you had the chance…" Zuko could almost see her brain ticking fiercely behind her thoughtful frown.
"Why Zuko? Why did you do those things? Why haven't you tried to capture Aang?"
"…For you…" he said it barely above a whisper, but he knew Katara heard him because she dropped his hand as if he had burned her.
She was completely horrified. Her eyes were wide, and one of her hands covered her mouth, which had dropped open in shock
"No…" she breathed.
"I… I'm sorry-" Zuko stuttered.
"No Zuko, I'm sorry," she replied miserably.
"You know what's happening to me?"
"Yes. The spirit stole your heart, and I think she gave it to me," Katara looked ready to start weeping at the thought, "That's why you haven't been yourself. Aang managed to fix someone that this happened to, don't worry, I'll speak to him and he'll fix you too," she said with conviction.
Zuko shook his head.
"It's better this way. If I'm fixed, I might go back to hunting the Avatar. I might try to hurt you and your friends again. You should leave me like this, that way I won't ever hurt you again," he had a vague idea of how angry he would be if he were completely himself, and it frightened him. He didn't know what he would do.
"No," intoned Katara seriousily, "Everyone deserves free will, and if giving you back yours makes us enemies again, so be it." Zuko blinked.
"But it would be better for you-"
"I don't care! You don't deserve to be stuck this way Zuko! It's not right!" she burst into tears again, and that was the moment Appa arrived back, touching down beside them.
Sokka leap out of the saddle and rushed to Katara's side, putting an arm over her shoulders.
He glared at Zuko over her head.
"What did he do?" Sokka demanded.
"H-he didn't do anything Sokka! I couldn't save Kassuq a-and the spirt did the same thing to him as it did to Jaya!" she sobbed.
"You mean, that's why he's-"
"Yes!"
Sokka looked at Zuko with pity.
"…We better find Aang. Come on."
Sokka helped Katara up onto the saddle, before pulling himself up after her.
"Well? You coming?" called Sokka, offering Zuko a hand from the top of the bison.
Before he could do anything, he heard a yell.
"Zuko!" all three teens turned at the new voice.
Iroh was rushing towards them.
"You guys go on without me," Zuko implored hurriedly. He wasn't ready for Iroh to know he was a full-blown traitor yet, he wasn't ready to give up his final remaining familial connection. If Katara and Sokka interacted with Iroh, they would probably give him away
"But Zuko-" he cut Katara's protestations off, "You need to find the Avatar and I need to deal with my Uncle. We'll catch up later," he said firmly.
Katara and Sokka exchanged a glace before nodding at him, and Zuko sagged in relief.
"Yip yip," said Sokka, and then they were soaring away. Katara's forlorn face stared at him over the edge of the saddle until they were lost amongst the clouds.
"Zuko, are you alright?" Iroh seized him by the shoulders and checked him over for injuries.
"I'm okay Uncle."
"Good. We should leave. Now."
"What? Why?"
"The Chief's daughter sacrificed her life to restore the moon spirit. Understandably, he isn't in a very lenient or forgiving mood."
Zuko felt a pang of sadness.
"The girl with white hair?"
Iroh nodded solemnly.
It would probably be better for Katara if he just left. If he stayed, she would get the Avatar to fix him, and he would try to hurt her. He didn't want that.
"Okay. Let's go."
Whew! Fight scenes are really hard to write!
Sorry about typos as always!
Please let me know what you think :)