Hi. An important A/N will be at the bottom of the chapter. Thanks for reading.
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−Hey…− Lily jumps startled from where she is kneeling in front of her suitcase doing Tetris, trying to fit everything inside.
She whips around to find Mark leaning against the threshold, arms stretched out, hands in the pockets of the Levi's he is wearing.
−Hi− she answers, glancing her shied eyes to the floor, getting up, she goes to sit on her bed, facing him, legs dangling from the edge of it.
−Is everything okay? – Lily asks, surprised to see him there
−Yeah! Yeah… − comes his abrupt response − just wanting to see how you were doing with the packing process− he says, now looking slightly more relaxed, looking towards her suitcase, almost packed.
A rosy colour tints her cheeks and she answers:
−Oh, well just wondering how have I gathered so many things in such a short time – her throaty chuckle startles him, splaying an awkward silence that hangs in between.
−So… this Friday, huh? Didn't think you would get a flight so soon−he says nervously, glancing around the room to see everything have banished from the shelves that not so long ago were filled with little treasures.
He directs one quick peek to her, but is all she needs to get up from her perch on the bed and close the distance between them, leaving only a small amount of space separating their bodies.
−What do you mean with so soon? You have been gone two weeks, Mark, it's not that soon− Lily says, the colour of her cheeks again rising, and not from shyness this time− Besides, it was the first available one inside my pay-range… didn't want to extend my time here anymore than necessary. –
A hush settles again in the wide-open space, all the other sounds stifled by the rhythm of each- others breathing, the only thing they can hear.
−I already talked to my mom… she's pretty stressed, now having to start the process of looking for someone else all over again.
−I know it's all seems kind of rushed, but believe me, if you were in my position you would want to go this soon too. Plus, in the contract it says that within two weeks of giving the heads –up to the parents, I can go, and on Friday it makes just two weeks since I told your mom, so I'm in my right. – comes her agitated answer.
Those two weeks since their moment outside the party, that night when they went home hand in hand and bid the good-nights, had served Lily to be more sure on her idea of going home. The morning after, full of courage, knowing he wasn't in the house anymore, she went to talk with the mom, not really expecting the words she told Lily, making her feel more awful with herself.
She is shocked when his almost-pleading voice reaches her ears,
−Don't go. Please.
−I already have the flight
−But you haven't told your family, I know you, you haven't. I will repay you for the flight, but please, please, don't go. −
Those pleads, they are confusing the shit out of her, and he has been doing that since they met, just confusing her, and it's really, really ending with her patience.
−Why do you want me here so much, huh? I don't understand you− she says, shaking her head, and watching from the corner of her eye as he takes one more step forward. Close, so close.
His hand lifts from where it's hanging on his side, and he places it on her cheek.
−Give me a chance to show you why do you have to stay here. − [With me], he lefts unsaid –
Lily takes a step back from him, his hand falling again to hang loosely on his side, a look of disappointment already forming on his face.
−Okay. If you think you can prove to me how ''good is living here'' [With you, she lefts unsaid], I will stay for as long as I feel happy again, but I don't really know how you are going to do this, you only have two days left, and really, the problem is not this job with the girls… it's… it's more complicated than that. – she knows she is rambling. The seconds after hearing herself say 'okay' with her jaw squared, too sure of herself, the sensation of losing her time has invaded her and she has scrambled to get herself out of the idea with a lame excuse. And unconsciously she has dig herself in a deeper hole.
−Then what is it? I want to know, I want to help you feel happy here or wherever, I really want. I want to know all of you. We have shared good moments, moments of fun, of discovering new things together, of long walks around here, and I want to share more things with you, that's why I want to help you feel happy here. With me [not left unsaid, this time] and I think I can do it. –
While talking he has started to get closer again and she now has the back of her knees against the side of the bed, just a little more and she can sit on it. So she does, tired of wanting to know herself what is that is going wrong. So surprised by his confession. She just sits slumped over the duvet, smooth beneath her, and exhales a big breath, eyes on her thighs where her hands are fidgeting with a little string of her leggings.
He sits down beside her, not really caring anymore about personal space, and puts a hand over hers, to stop the nervous twitch.
She starts with a quiet voice that makes him close more the distance between their bodies, and their shoulders touch, thighs pressed together.
−I suppose I came here determined to prove my independence to my parents, but also to clear my mind a little− shaking her head, she looks now to the front, where on the shelve there is one last item yet to be put away. A frame, with a photo of her whole family in it. A present from them, before she went into the airport.
–I didn't know what to do after high school, didn't really wanted to study a degree, and my parents kept giving those ideas of what to do, but I just wanted to think by myself and not to start something just because. So I thought, while I decide, I could do something else, and gain some experience… yeah, well, this is the result of that thought.
I had a friend who did something similar, it's called working as an au-pair, and she was so happy and I thought, why not, right? Now I know why it was not a good idea. –
−You know, − she starts again after some seconds of recollection, now looking at him− is funny, my parents kept telling me how clever I was when I was a little girl but when I look at myself now… I think I was too naïve in trusting that living with some strangers would be that great, it's a fifty-fifty, from my friend's perspective it was so good, from mine… not so much− she talks about it with so much deception and resignation, 'this is it, and I have to give myself into it, drop it and to another thing I'll go'.
He has been silent all along, just listening, trying to understand her better, and scrambling to come up with something more to tell her.
She interprets this silence as an uncomfortable- don't –know- what- to –tell- you silence so she says:
−I'm sorry, I know she is your mom, but… I trusted too much on what she told me when we did Skype before coming here, on what I read on the profile she wrote, and she's not been that good to me, maybe, no not maybe, I'm sure is really strange to her too to have me here, but I'm explaining this from my experience, and it's really not what I expected from the pictures my mind created before coming here. −
−I don't know what to say, and I don't really think it's my place to discuss that, but maybe if I could talk to my mom about it…
She jumps instantly at the sound of that idea. That's the last thing she wants to hear from Megan (the mom), that she has put her son against her or something like that.
−No! – that came rather loudly− No, − she says quietly, and angles her body toward him, one leg bent and kneecap pressing into his thigh –look, − she sighs− let's be honest here… we both like each other, okay, and those days together were great, I had so much fun with you, and I thank you for that and I'm so grateful that you want to keep showing me those amazing things I'm sure are here, but… gosh− this is difficult, Lily, come one− I don't think this is my place, I don't think whatever there is between us could be more that what it is now−
Those words dishearten him immediately, making Lily think: 'okay, this is it. Our goodbye. In two days we'll be strangers again, we will move on, and forget about each other, and one day in the future we will remember the other because of something silly we saw on the street that reminded of the other and then we'll continue with our lives'.
Lost on her reflection, Lily hasn't noticed how he too has turned his body toward her, leg bent, knees touching now, his hand on top of her thigh, high enough for it not to be considered a between-friends gesture.
And the next thing she feels is the delicate press of lips over her own. His lips. Marks' lips. And it's just the softest push she has ever felt, and it's just that, lips intercalated, hers, his, hers, his and a sigh. His or hers?
And to her own surprise, she adds more pressure to the kiss, her hand acting on her own, travelling from over the comforter underneath her, to his face, his cheek, caressing it slightly, where is rough with the day-old beard.
He opens, and her tongue is darting out to graze against his upper lip and then carefully, feathery, goes inside his mouth.
And it quickly escalates from there. And he, being careful as not to scare her off doesn't really do anything more. She. Is all Lily who is taking a step forward. Towards what, exactly? She doesn't really know. But she is feeling oh so good in that moment that doesn't care.
And then she realizes she wants this. Whatever this is. And so she does what she has to do.
Their bodies change of position, but not their lips, they stay close, glued together, as if two magnets were being brought close in unison and they unite at last from both their forces.
She doesn't really understand why is taking him so long to put her closer, hence she acts on it.
In a brisk, hasty move she's straddling him.
He shifts his hand to her hair, clutching the wavy, chocolate colour locks and then resting it on the smooth skin of her neck. His other one, is already somewhat occupied slipping under her shirt. Slowly travelling her shape, her waist, her stomach, boldly going up, so that his thumb is touching the underside of her breast through her bra.
No more words are needed.
Both of them know what is going to happen.
And they want it to happen.
Thus they make it happen.
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−So…− Kate starts tentatively− you and Mark-mmm− doesn't really know how to continue− something more happened, then.
A little embarrassed now that that part of the story came out, she just nods and with a beautiful blush booming on her cheeks and a grin threatening to slip out, she looks downcast.
Castle has stayed a total of five minutes, until he realized (or by the look Kate was giving him) that Lily would be more comfortable talking about this just with her mom. Beckett could explain a little what it is all about when they were alone.
And when her daughter has arrived to that part of the story in particular (which she expected, she had been a detective, for god's sake), she has been, too a little awkward, but then she has put herself on her daughter's feet and thought back to when she talked to her mom about 'this stuff', so she tried to sound as casual as she could.
The tranquillity Kate reflects works well on Lily who, after a moment of silence, takes a deep breath and goes on with her confessions to her mom.
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I'm gonna love you, like I'm gonna lose you
I'm gonna hold you, like I'm saying goodbye.
Her hands cover his chest over his shirt, then under it, feeling his skin curl with shivers wherever her fingertips touches. She works his tee over his torso and shoulders, up his head and down his arms, and tosses it wherever it lands.
He does the same with hers, already gently touching her silky warm skin.
Piece by piece, not a single moment for a pause to think what they're going to do, they undress each other languidly, earnestly, so sure of themselves, to the last of their clothes.
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A/N. Well, you can say it! FINALLY! Hahah I know, and I'm so sorry. I will post (if the site works well and everything) two chapters, so you won't be left hanging with that last part of this chapter ;) Then, in the next one, at the end, I will write too an important A/N. Thank you so much!