Standard Disclaimers Apply.
Hey everyone thanks for reviewing, and reading and all that other stuff, it makes me happy to know that people are enjoying reading as much as I'm enjoying writing, the arguments really are a blast. And yeah, don't really have anything to say so on with the show I guess.
Petting the Mountain Lion
HSMHSMHSMHSMHSMHSMHSMHSMHSM
I was being chased by something. I couldn't see it, but it was closing in faster and faster. I turned around and saw what it was. A mountain lion trying to stalk it's prey. It may be small but golden and deadly. I ran faster but it was no use, suddenly I heard someone shouting my name, "Chad!…… Chad!…….. Mr. Danforth!"
The mountain lion jumped, and I felt its jaws close around my throat. Gasping for air I shot up straight and opened my eyes. My math teacher looked at me sternly, "Mr. Danforth, if you must sleep in class, please refrain from disrupting the rest of it with your girlish squeals."
The class snickered and I hung my head. I heard a familiar scoff to my right. Turning I caught the eye of IT. Of course the beast had to be in the class that I sucked in. Focusing back on the board, I heard my stomach growl, and more snickers. I guess my stomach was really loud. At least lunch was next.
I sat down in the cafeteria next to Taylor, grinning and "accidentally" bumping her in greeting. I scooted a little bit closer to her.
"Hey!" she protested and shoved me back. I laughed and tickled her sides, as she shrieked in protest.
"Get a room!" I hear someone, Jason I think, shout faintly, but I was too absorbed to care.
I pulled her close to me, and kissed her cheek. Then her forehead, and nose, all the time she had this cute, extremely pleased look on her face.
Troy and Ryan sat down, both with wistful looks on their face, probably wishing they could engage in public displays of affection too. Then IT sat down, completely ruining my moment. For some reason the feeling I had with Taylor just then was replaced, to one that was more like... guilt?
Weird. I shifted my gaze to Troy, "So Troy Boy, what do we have planned for this Wednesday?"
He looked at me and shrugged, "Probably just go to the Supreme Bean again."
"I thought we were trying to change it up. You know, so we wouldn't go there EVERY hump day?"
Troy's indifferent look turned into a smug one, "We could go to Starbucks?"
I crumpled up a napkin and threw it at him. "Fuck you." However, I missed Troy and hit Ryan, in the eye.
The smug expression, changed to one of concern, "Man, Ryan, are you okay?" Noticing everyone's stares, Troy turned a little bit red, "Um... Sharpay, maybe you need to take him to the nurses office?"
The monster laughed, and used a paw to toss part of IT's mane behind a shoulder, "Maybe you should take him."
Troy matched the challenging glare with one of his own, until Ryan put an arm on the other boys, "Troy, I'm not hurt, it's fine."
"Are you sure? I mean it could have poked you with an edge or something?"
"No harm done, I promise." Ryan gave Troy a smile, it's brilliance being unmatched by probably any other smile there was.
Of course we ended up going to Starbucks. Troy just couldn't resist because he thought it would be just so hilarious. Walking in and looking at its overstuffed, generic chairs that were artfully "homely", I cringed a little bit. Getting in the way too long line, I looked at the possibilities. Picking up a bottle of water, I read the back, Ethos... I won't hurt my conscience with this I suppose. Paying for the drink I sat down by Troy, his boy and of course IT.
Opening the bottle I took a drink, and found Troy staring at me questioningly. "I thought you said you weren't going to buy anything form here? Too much like fucking capitalism?"
I shrugged, "Yeah, but apparently if you buy this type of water, it donates money to the United Nations."
"Really?" He raised an eyebrow at the bottle. "Why?"
"Clean water initiative. They donate part of their profits to get clean water to third world countries. I figure I can support an evil empire, if I can support the United Nations too."
The beast roared with laughter, "The United Nations is a quagmire of useless energy."
I looked at the she-beast in all seriousness. "Are you heartless?" Troy and Ryan quickly backed away to watch the melee from a safe distance.
IT scoffed at me, "Just because I don't support a bureaucracy, doesn't mean I lack a heart. Besides a heart isn't what you feel with, that's in your brain."
"Before the United Nations there was two world wars. There hasn't been one since. doesn't that say something?"
"The reason world wars stopped happening isn't because of the UN, it's because of the Nuclear Era. Cold War, hello?"
"Regardless, the UN still gives a lot of humanitarian aid and support to so many developing nations."
"Yeah and their peace keepers go in and rape their women! they're like barbarians."
"But that's the individual peace keepers, not the UN."
"Maybe the UN should train their forces better, or maybe they could just train them period. Seeing as they get no training now."
"Well maybe if the United States got more involved instead of trying to do everything on our own, the United Nations would be a more successful place."
"Do you know how much money we give to them? Do you know how much money they waste? And every time we try to curb it to make them more fiscally responsible, we get people like you, who are arrogant, and stupid and just try to look at the bright side of things! People who think that just throwing money into the problem will solve it."
"I'm not talking about money. I'm talking about the fact that we have Three Peace keepers in the United Nations TOTAL, yet we're willing to send people in our National Guard to Iraq?"
"The United Nations needs more than just brute strength. They need a complete makeover. Like maybe, they would be successful if they were allowed to shoot guns."
"But that goes against the whole UN charter."
"Which brings me back to my point that the United Nations is a political sink hole."
"That's because of people like you, who are unwilling to work with people and help people. People like you who think that their little lives are more important than starving children in Africa. It's because of people like you that there is world selfishness. We have the potential to feed the entire world, but people like you are too afraid to give up your perfect life style, and are too lazy to help."
I felt immensely satisfied with myself, that I had finally won an argument against the monster, that is, until the Lion stood up and began coming my way.
IT loomed closer and closer... oh GEEZ she was going to bite my head off.
To my surprise, and probably everyone else's, she did quite the opposite. The she-lion sat on me. Holy shit slice, what is she doing? As she strattled me, her skirt rode up and I saw a flash of pink. Blushing hard I looked IT in the eye. Big mistake, Mountain Lions have beautiful eyes, their look is so different, so captivating. The world was silent around me. The Mountain Lion leaned in closer, the only thing I could focus on was her nose.
"You, have to be the most ignorant, rudest, inconceivable person that I have ever met. How do you live with yourself? You have no clue about anything." The words out of her mouth were vicious, but the tone was anything but. It reminded me of a mother scolding a small child for hurting himself. Except a mother wouldn't be sitting the way the creature was. She was so close now, I could just feel myself turning redder.
I leaned forward until my forehead touched IT's "You don't know me at all, don't pretend you do to make yourself feel better."
The situation was tense, I could feel it. People in China probably could have felt it, and most certainly everyone in the room.
I was saved by Taylor, ever the angel, she pulled the She-beast from off of me and looked IT in the eye. The Monster who had been unhappily detached from her prey glared at the cause of the disturbance, "What are you doing?"
Taylor matched the She-cats stare, "What am I doing? What are you doing all over him like that."
"Please, it's nothing like that. Besides I think he may have enjoyed that." I stared wide-eyed at Taylor and shook my head rapidly, no way would she take the word of a Feline over mine.
The only response from Taylor was a scoff as she turned away and motioned for me to follow.
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For once, I am almost positive everything about the UN is true.
And for the record, I love the UN, even if the things Sharpay says about them are true, they are the only international organization to involve almost all countries, so please support them UNICEF and all that.
Also, Ethos water is real, starbucks really does have it, I'm not sure if they donate through the UN actually but they definitely donate to help give clean water to third world countries, so next time you go to starbucks, buy a bottle of water.
And yay for Chad for finally winning an argument... kind of. Lots of Love to Danielle for being super cool and betaing, and Don't hesitate to tell me what you thought!
