Rooted to the spot, her stance stiff and awkward, Nancy could only stare in shock as Ned approached her hesitantly and kissed her gently on the cheek.
"It's really good to see you, Nan," Ned murmured in a heartbreakingly sincere tone, taking the opportunity to put his hand lightly on her arm. "You look great."
Being so close to Ned after so long, Nancy felt horribly confused. Though she'd known it was inevitable that she'd bump into her ex-boyfriend at some point, and had rehearsed it over and over in her head, Nancy hadn't counted on the hurt and betrayal that swamped her when she finally brought herself to meet Ned's warm brown eyes.
"Yeah, Ned, it's good to see you too," Nancy replied coldly, abruptly withdrawing her arm as though his very touch was burning her skin. "But I need to get back to the gang. See you around, okay?"
"Don't be like that," Ned pleaded, and her steely resolve rapidly crumbled at the woebegone expression that crossed his face. "Look, I know this is weird, but I really think we need to talk. We can't ignore each other forever. Do you want to get a drink or something?"
"I don't know," Nancy replied doubtfully, discreetly glancing over his shoulder for sign of Rachael, the supposedly perfect girlfriend. "I mean, things are different now. You've got a girlfriend, for one," she reminded him bitterly, immediately hating herself for the jealousy so evident in her voice.
"Well it sure as hell doesn't look like you're too lonely," Ned retorted, his jaw clenched tightly as he gestured angrily at Jack, who by now was staring in utter bewilderment at the couple. "Who's that asshole anyway? Every time I looked over, he had his hands all over you."
"That asshole, as you so nicely put it, is being a perfect gentleman, actually," Nancy shot back indignantly, her eyes flashing. For a moment the two of them just stared at each other, and the anger between them was too familiar. Nancy suddenly felt very tired and sad.
"Look, this is a bad idea," she finally sighed. "We've only been talking for five minutes and we're already fighting again. I've got to head back to my date, okay? Enjoy the rest of the night. I'm sure I'll see you around."
"Nancy, I'm sorry, I'm being a total jerk," Ned berated himself, catching a firm hold of her hand and pulling her closer to him. "Please don't go. I don't want to ruin your date or anything but I really think we need to talk." Though Ned's demeanor had calmed considerably, Nancy was sure she could still detect an undercurrent of desperation in his voice.
Her heart racing, Nancy barely breathed as she made her hurried apologies to Jack, George and Bess. Not giving herself even a second to change her mind or to wonder whether she was simply making another huge mistake, Nancy let her emotions blindly lead her out of the nightclub with Ned, her hand warmly enclosed in his.
xxxxx
In stark contrast to the glamorous club, the bar, with its scuffed wooden floors and secondhand mismatched furniture, had a distinctly edgy feel and provided a much more intimate backdrop for the inevitably awkward opening moments of their conversation.
"So, how have things been with you?" Ned began a little nervously, taking a long pull from his bottle of beer before forcing himself to meet her gaze.
"The same, I guess," Nancy shrugged, unsure of what to say. Sighing inwardly, Nancy couldn't suppress the deep sadness and loss that swelled inside her when she thought of the situation they somehow found themselves in. Once best friends and lovers, Nancy and Ned were now little more than strangers and it was utterly depressing to discover how far apart they had grown in the previous year. Desperate to mask the awkward silence that ensued, Nancy quickly glanced around the bar, smiling self consciously when she noticed the mostly casual attire of the smattering of other customers dotted around the bar.
"What are you smirking about, Drew?" Ned asked in obvious confusion, the first real hint of a smile touching his lips.
"God, could I have a chosen a more inappropriate outfit?" Nancy laughed, wrapping her arms self-consciously around her bare shoulders. "Most people here are dressed in sweaters and jeans and here I am, wearing possibly the shortest dress in my entire wardrobe. I feel like a hooker."
"Well, if it's any consolation, you look gorgeous and not in anyway hooker-like," Ned smiled, his gaze locked on hers. "But here, take this, if you want," he offered in a gentlemanly fashion, pulling his dark-blue sweater over his head and offering it to Nancy.
"Thanks, that's really sweet of you," Nancy murmured as she accepted the sweater gratefully, a sudden pang of longing hitting her as she enclosed her self in the soft wool, breathing in his familiar scent.
The earlier tension dissipated, Ned and Nancy finally relaxed, sipping cool bottles of beer while they eagerly drank in all the minute details of each other's lives that they had missed over the previous months. It felt so good to be with him again, to talk to him again after all this time, and Nancy couldn't help but feel a delicious shiver run up her spine whenever their eyes met for a moment or their feet brushed together by accident under the table.
"I still can't believe you moved in with the girls," Ned chuckled, shaking his head in amusement. "You guys must have a lot of fun."
"Yeah, it's great," Nancy admitted with a smile. "Bess is a howl. She has at least two guys on the line at any one time and George and me are kept thoroughly entertained by the whole thing."
"It's good to know that some things never change," Ned laughed before turning to Nancy, his face suddenly serious. "And you, Nan, any guys? I mean, what about that guy tonight?"
"Guys," Nancy echoed with a hollow laugh, knowing she at least owed Ned a straight answer for once. "There are no guys. Jack is just some guy Bess set me up with."
"That's good," Ned replied tenderly before suddenly remembering himself and turning away, his face flushed with embarrassment.
Though Ned had been quietly interested in the finer details of her love life, Nancy noticed he was less than forthcoming about his own. He had spoken little of the girl she knew to be Rachael; in fact, he had not mentioned her name, even once, all night.
Draining the last of his beer, Ned glanced reluctantly at his watch. "I hate to say this, but I need to get back to the guys. I have an important presentation at work tomorrow and I need to catch a few hours of sleep. Maybe we can do this again sometime," he finished hopefully, his voice trailing away.
Being with him, being close to him after so long, Nancy felt sick to her stomach at the thought of Ned leaving her again. "Don't go," Nancy said suddenly, grabbing a firm hold of his arm lest he disappear out of her life for the second time. "Please don't go. I've missed you for so long and now you're here and I'm afraid if you walk out that door, I'm never going to see you again."
Shaking his head in disbelief, Ned pulled free of Nancy's grasp. "I don't believe you," he muttered angrily. "You go off with some other guy and then just expect things to be all right, that they'd suddenly go back to normal, just like that."
"Ned, you're right, you're totally right," Nancy admitted, shamefaced, tears welling up in her blue eyes. "I know, I've been a bitch to you and I don't deserve you but I love you, and being here with you tonight has made me realize that even more."
Swallowing hard, Ned finally forced her gaze to hers and when Nancy saw the naked hurt in his troubled eyes, she felt almost sick with guilt, knowing it was her selfish actions that caused it.
"I'm sorry, okay?" Nancy whispered, laying her hand gently on his, gratified when he didn't pull it away. "I love you so much and I can't believe how stupid I was to ruin things between us. For that, I will never be able to forgive myself. But you hurt me too, you know," she added in a small voice, the first tears streaming down her face. "God, I couldn't even talk to you and when I heard you had a new girlfriend so soon after we had broken up, it felt like you were killing me, like you'd never even loved me."
"You know that's not true," Ned murmured in a gentler voice, tentatively wrapping an arm around her shoulder. "I did love you. I loved you too much, if I'm being honest," he admitted softly, pulling her closer to him and making comforting noises as he gently ran his fingers over her skin. "You broke my heart when you went away with him and I just couldn't do it anymore. That's the truth," he shrugged, sheepishly.
"And her?" Nancy forced the words out, not bringing herself to mention her name. Though she dreaded what his answer might be, Nancy had to know. "Do you love her?"
"No," Ned answered with a smile. "Rachael's a lovely girl and all, but she's not you, Nan." Leaning in close to Nancy, Ned rested a hand gently on her cheek. "I've never stopped loving you," he admitted softly before gently taking her in his arms and kissing her passionately.
xxxxx
Later, in the calm quiet of her room, Nancy lay sprawled in Ned's arms, her fingers tangled in his hair as they kissed tenderly. "God, Nan, it feels so good to be with you," he murmured lovingly, trailing kisses up and down her neck as he pulled her closer. "I've missed you so much."
"I know," Nancy smiled, gasping suddenly as Ned's hand crept up under her skirt, delicately exploring the tender skin.
As their kisses deepened, Ned tugged impatiently at Nancy's dress, his fingers clumsily untying the thin straps. "You look so beautiful," he moaned, kissing the soft skin on her neck before hastily pulling off her dress and tossing it on the floor.
Ned's touch growing more insistent, her skin burning at his sheer closeness, Nancy pulled his face down to hers and kissed him gently. "I love you so much, Ned. Are you sure you want to do this?"
"What do you think?" he smiled, pressing his lips to hers before laying her gently on the bed.
The crisp white sheet tangled around her, Nancy was roused to consciousness by the clatter of cups and plates over carefully hushed voices. The events of the previous night replaying slowly in her head, Nancy made a contented noise and rolled over, eager to be enclosed in the warmth of Ned's strong arms. Opening her eyes, Nancy was dismayed to find the spot previously occupied by Ned cold and empty, the only trace of him a folded sheet of paper with her name scrawled hastily across.
No, Ned wouldn't do this to me, she thought desperately, panic bubbling inside her as she grasped the note. Her eyes clouding with tears, Nancy felt suddenly sick as she read the opening words of the note.
Nancy,
I'm sorry for flaking out without even saying goodbye, but I think it's for the best. Last night was amazing but I should never have let it happen. It's my fault and I'm really sorry if I've hurt you, but believe me, it's better this way.
Ned
Shocked tears streaking down her face, Nancy collapsed onto the bed, the letter falling from her grasp and fluttering slowly onto the ground.
xxxxx
Sighing in defeat, Nancy placed the spoon beside the gooey remains of her chocolate cake before smiling apologetically at her aunt. "Thanks for the dinner, Aunt Eloise. It was absolutely gorgeous," Nancy assured her with a smile. "But if I eat another bite, I'm seriously going to explode."
"I know the feeling," her aunt laughed, spooning the last of the cake into her mouth before pushing the bowl away guiltily. "If I don't fit into my new black skirt tomorrow, I'll know what to blame," she added jokingly.
"I don't think you need to worry too much, Aunt Eloise," Nancy smiled affectionately as she regarded the older woman's slender figure. "You haven't put on a pound in your life," she finished, guiltily clamping a hand over her mouth to suppress a yawn. "Sorry, this case has me totally wiped," she apologized.
"You do look a little tired, Nan." her aunt commented with some concern. "Give your dad a call and then head off to bed. An early night would do you no harm at all."
In truth, Nancy was exhausted. The case which had brought Nancy unexpectedly to New York involved a missing child and was both distressing and time consuming, allowing little opportunity for rest. Trawling tirelessly through local schools and parks, Nancy was grateful for the distraction it offered from her troublesome thoughts of Ned, but then felt instantly guilty for mourning something as trivial as a lost love when Jessica's heartbroken family had lost their whole world. Though Ned had made several attempts to contact her, Nancy had pointedly ignored all his phone calls and text messages, outwardly feigning relief when they slowly petered off but inwardly feeling more than a little disappointed that Ned hadn't tried harder to win her back.
Gratefully accepting a cup of steaming tea from her aunt, Nancy quickly dialed her father's number, relieved when she heard his familiar comforting voice. Though she was enjoying her aunt's company, she missed her father, and the frantic hustle and bustle of the city made her long for the quiet peace of home.
"Hi, Dad," Nancy greeted her father cheerfully. "I'm just checking in before I head to bed."
"It's good to hear your voice, honey," Carson responded warmly. "How are things going with the case?"
"Not great," Nancy sighed, rubbing her eyes tiredly. "She seems to have literally vanished into thin air. I've checked out all the schools and hospitals and so far, nothing. You know, I hate giving up but I feel like I really don't have a choice this time. Somebody really doesn't want this child to be found."
"It's not like you to get so down," her father observed worriedly. "Is there anything else the matter?"
"No, it's just been a really long day, I guess." Nancy reassured him, unwilling to involve her father in the latest drama with Ned.
"Well, don't let it get you down," Carson said encouragingly. "Get a good night's sleep and things will look better in the morning, they always do."
"I wish I had your optimism, Dad," Nancy replied doubtfully. "But I am tired, so I'll definitely take your advice. How are things at home?" she added, hastily changing the subject.
"Good, honey. Have I any hope of seeing my only daughter anytime in the next few weeks?" he joked, well accustomed to Nancy's hectic work schedules.
After swearing to her father that she would definitely spend a long weekend in River Heights as soon as the case was over, Nancy passed the phone to her aunt before wandering into the living room and sinking wearily into the plush leather sofa. Her attention vaguely focused on the mediocre crime drama showing on TV and the soft murmurings of her aunt's voice drifting gently into the room, Nancy gave a start when her phone buzzed unexpectedly..
"Bess, it's so great to hear from you," Nancy greeted her friend happily. "How are things with you and George?" she bubbled excitedly, eager to catch up on all the juicy gossip she'd missed during her time in New York.
"The same, you know," she replied in an offhand manner, her voice serious and devoid of its usual bubbliness.
"No, I don't know," Nancy replied, puzzled. Unnerved by the girl's uncharacteristic silence, Nancy pressed on, determined to get to the truth. "There's something wrong, isn't there? Come on, Bess, tell me."
Hearing the girl's weary sigh, Nancy's anxiety only increased. "It's Ned," Bess began haltingly, as though reluctant to inflict further pain on her friend. "I was at the club last night, and I saw him with that girl, Rachael. Now, I didn't see exactly what was going on but they were definitely together. I hate being the bearer of bad news, but you deserve to know.
"Should I not have told you?" Bess added after a pause, concerned when Nancy failed to respond. "I mean, I know you have a lot going on already, but I didn't want you to hear this from someone else."
"It's okay, Bess," Nancy answered in a resigned tone, her stomach plummeting in shock at the unpleasant development. "After what happened between us and all, I'm hardly surprised."
"Are you sure?" Bess probed, unconvinced.
"Yeah, I'm positive," Nancy lied, desperately holding the tears back to maintain some semblance of dignity. Devastated by the news, Nancy needed privacy to make sense of her jumbled emotions and she knew that if Bess suspected her friend was in any way upset, she would keep her on the phone all night.
"Bess, thanks for being such a good friend," Nancy said gratefully before bidding the girl a hurried farewell.
Alone with her thoughts, Nancy wept bitterly, her final hopes of a happy reunion, cruelly dashed. Drained by her tears, she could only stare into space as the harsh reality of the situation washed over her. "It's over," Nancy told herself sternly, swiping a hand across her damp cheeks. "It's over and I'm never going back. Ned and I are finished for good this time."