By the time Sherwin arrives at Sarasota High, the five-minute warning bell has already sounded. Only a few remaining students are scattered throughout the main hall as they scramble to collect their belongings and race to class, yet none are the person he most wants to see. There's no time to scope out Jonathan and wish him well for the rest of the day—he's most likely already in class, anyway—so he grabs the essentials from his locker and heads to first period.
Sherwin hurries to take his seat at the far right-hand side of the classroom and places a green World History folder on the desk. Everyone is already settled down for the lesson, which gives him the perfect setting to dodge peer interrogation. The late arrival hadn't been planned, although it couldn't have happened on a better day. Curious glances, hushed whispers, and intrusive questions would no doubt have greeted him had he stepped into school any earlier. For now, Sherwin takes comfort in leaning his body against the wall and focusing on his work. He enjoys the reassurance of settling into this familiar, relaxing position. This seat positions him away from the main commotion of class, and even on this day should provide cover from the most inquisitive students. Still, his eyes remain downcast for the entirety of the lecture, trying to appear undetectable as he jots down important notes and draws the occasional sketch.
Much to Sherwin's delight, the remainder of first period goes by without anyone trying to catch his attention. He worried his first day back to school after his heart's exposure would cause an insatiable stir of curiosity, yet no one appears to have the energy to pay him any notice. Lethargy has taken the place of the weekend high and established itself within each person. Even the usually chipper Ms. Maddox finds it difficult to talk about the Song Dynasty in any enjoyable way. It can only be attributed to the effects of a sleepy Monday morning.
By noontime, everyone makes their way to lunch. Students are densely lined throughout the hallways of the school, interior akin to that of a Frank Lloyd Wright structure with its sharp edges and box-like design. The multi-colored SGA posters and flyers dotting the walls are the only things giving life to the dull white surfaces, and Sherwin ignores them all as he travels to the lockers. Just as he rounds the corner, two girls from his freshmen class—Natasha and Caroline—come into sight.
"Did you see the way he charged in here last week?" Natasha asks.
"I couldn't believe it," Caroline replies. "The guy has always been a bit jumpy, but I never suspected him of liking Jonathan."
"Yeah, and with how nervous Sherwin seemed during the whole thing, I bet he wishes it never happened."
"Can't fight the feeling forever, I guess. Wonder how Jonathan is going to deal with all this."
They continue on out of earshot, but Sherwin doesn't follow. He doesn't want to hear any more. His heart beats in an uneven staccato.
Why now? He wonders. Things had been going so well. The anticipation of being the main focus of today's gossip had finally eased from his system, yet hearing his classmates discussing the very thing he feared sends all that curbed anxiety flooding back. It begins to feel as if the walls are constricting around him, making it difficult to imagine staying inside the building for much longer. All Sherwin wanted was to find Jonathan so they could enjoy lunch together. Now, all that crosses his mind is how much he wants to leave these halls and everyone in them behind.
Instead of looking for his friend, Sherwin decides to go to the one place where some peace of mind might be found: the apple tree. It is here that the young boy sits pretzel-style for the duration of fifth period and eats his lunch. The gossip doesn't come as a surprise, yet he still feels the pang of hurt that comes from knowing you're being talked about. It was just a matter of time before the rumors reached his ear, but the reality of it still stings. Nobody even has the decency to discuss it with him outright.
Every so often, he trails his fingers along the jagged bark, being careful not to damage any part of its structure. One would think eating unaccompanied in this respect would be lonely, but it gives Sherwin a sense of serenity he wouldn't have gotten had he stayed inside with the incessant high school chatter. In fact, he likes this location much better than his usual spot in the music department hallway. Listening to the euphonious sounds of students practicing their trumpets and flutes has always been one of the best parts of each day, yet sitting under this beautiful tree makes it easy to see why Jonathan enjoys coming here so much. Maybe the two of them can make this a lunch-time routine.
The rest of the day—thankfully—proves uneventful. Sherwin doesn't hear any other conversations revolving around the status of his love life, yet he can't shake the feeling that someone, somewhere, is talking about him. The only consolation is in knowing Jonathan will be here by the end of the day to help center his thoughts elsewhere.
Once the final bell rings, Sherwin makes his way to Jonathan's locker. He wants to apologize for not being with him during the break, and also just to have some time together before homework obligations.
He's only a few yards away before he notices someone standing directly across from Jonathan. Sherwin tries to give the two some space while they talk, but he can't help overhearing their exchange.
"Really, Jonathan, why would you want to associate yourself with him? It's not like you're obligated to adopt him just because he has a crush on you."
"You don't get to choose who my friends are, Caleb. That's for me to decide."
"Whatever. It's your reputation."
Jonathan gathers his belongings and leaves without another word. He travels down the hall until Sherwin comes into view, and the smile he offers is immediate and bright. Once he sees the other boy's dejected look, however, that expression turns into one of concern.
"Hey, what's going on?" Jonathan asks.
"Not a whole lot. Just wanted to meet up with you now that we can leave.
Jonathan is silent for a moment, speculating. "You overheard everything, didn't you?"
"Not everything. Just the tail-end of the conversation." One side of his mouth quirks up, giving him a bashful look. "What can I say, I like to eavesdrop."
The good-natured reply helps assuage Jonathan's previous worry, yet he can still detect some degree of unease. It's clear these two have had enough school for one day, and the less time spent in this building right now, the better.
"How about we go somewhere. It can be any place you'd like. Just name the spot and we'll go."
It doesn't take Sherwin long to decide. "I know a place."
Arlington Park hasn't changed at all in the two years since Sherwin last visited. Everything from the shade trees, benches, bike racks and beyond remain unsullied. It's as if the scenery remains as unchanged as a still taken with Sherwin's camera, forever preserved in a state of perpetual stagnancy.
The boys sit next to each other near the edge of the trees, away from the crowd of people enjoying various park activities. With legs outstretched and pressed against each other, they overlook and admire the grounds.
"I can't believe I've never been to this park before," Jonathan states.
"I'm sure you have, although you might not remember if your parents only took you to the playground. We may have been playmates at one point and not even known it."
"Now that is something I wouldn't forget."
As if on command, the compliment sends color rushing to Sherwin's cheeks. Would he ever become immune to his love's kind words?
The ginger nudges his foot against Jonathan's, too flustered at the moment to respond with words of his own. Before long, a question comes to mind.
"Aren't there other friends you usually spend time with after school?"
"Not really. Why do you think I like escaping to our tree so much? It gives me some respite from all the interaction everyone throws my way during the day."
"What about the people you talk with in school, though? They must want to hang out with you outside of class every so often."
Before replying, Jonathan shifts his and Sherwin's body so they are facing each other. Their legs are tucked under their bodies in kneeling positions.
"For whatever reason, people are drawn to me. I don't try to make myself out to be this popular and exceptionally engaging guy, yet people still never fail to look my way. It can get annoying, actually. I choose to spend my time with those whose company is better than my own solitude, and you are one of the special few who fits that bill."
He then takes Sherwin's hands into his own and places their interlocked fingers on each other's knees. It's after sharing such a meaningful look that Sherwin decides to be brave again. His right hand unwinds from Jonathan's, comes up to cup his love's cheek, and then he presses their lips together. The dark-haired boy responds by wrapping his own hand around the base of Sherwin's neck, fingers playing with the copper curls it touches. The kiss is sweet and gentle and possesses all the elements of young love.
Lips now apart, they lean their foreheads together and marvel in the delight of the kiss, with large grins plastered across each of their faces.
"I think I have an idea to make this day absolutely perfect," Jonathan says. "Can I read to you?"
It isn't what Sherwin is expecting, but he doesn't hesitate before answering: "Yes."
This book, The Picture of Dorian Gay, is the very one Sherwin saw in the hands of his crush on the day he attempted to conceal his heart. The two boys lay on their backs and nestle against each other right before Jonathan leafs through the pages and begins.
"You are a wonderful creation. You know more than you think
you know, just as you know less than you want to know…"
As he continues on, the words mingle with the soft hum of buzzing insects and rustling wind. With hands laced behind his head and eyes closed, Sherwin allows himself to be transported by the cadence of Jonathan's voice.