Timeline for Part 8:

11x08, both Omelia scenes. 11x09 and 11x10. Basically Amelia is dealing with Herman's tumor and Owen is working on his veterans project with Callie while handling his duties as chief.

The Journey – Chapter 8

Owen walked into the scrub room, trying to ignore the throbbing headache that was assaulting him. Not only had he not got much sleep the past few days, ever since he'd set foot in the hospital that morning things had become increasingly worse.

First, he'd had to solve a feud between Maggie Pierce and Derek Shepherd to then see one of the two soldiers in his project with Callie getting hurt after the orthopedic surgeon had openly stimulated them to compete. Owen knew he had probably overreacted by lashing out at her, but he was far from his right mind. At that moment, his biggest concern was making sure the patient received best medical care for his head trauma. And he was glad he could count on Amelia Shepherd for that.

The chief was ready to exit the scrub room after getting an update on the patient status when he heard her voice, as she spoke almost anxiously:

"I feel like I owe you an explanation. About what you heard last week."

Owen turned around, carefully listening to what she had to say. He had heard, from someone else, a very personal thing about Amelia and even though he knew it was none of his business to know the details, it touched him that she had taken her time to come forward about her problem. Hearing her share more details made him feel surprisingly concerned for her well being, for her addiction apparently had been much more severe than he would initially guess.

And Owen knew too well himself of how hard it could be to share such a dark part about oneself. Trying to spare Amelia from feeling embarrassed or ashamed, he was quick to kindly add that she didn't have to say anything else, for Derek had already explained she was doing well in rehab. His instinct had been right, Amelia wasn't a risk and as her boss that's all he needed to know. No matter how much his personal feelings pointed otherwise.

"I work for you and I respect you and I like you, so if it's all right, I don't care to hang my professional relationships on Derek Shepherd's reputation." Amelia spoke, awing him. Owen tilted his head and nodded in agreement, taking in her words with genuine interest. "I needed you to hear from me. I know it's a choice, keeping me on. I know I am a risk."

The chief of surgery stared deeply into her eyes. The way Amelia had humbly acknowledged her condition and confessed she respected him and liked him softened him up completely. Owen felt an urge to hold, comfort her and tell her he knew exactly what she was feeling. He understood her pain and somehow, with her childlike manners and sincerity of emotions, Amelia had come to inspire a feeling of protection in him that Owen couldn't quite figure out. He noticed the hesitation and the vulnerability she felt as she proudly stood sharing her past with him and realized how strong she had to be to deal with the situation in such a mature, graceful way when she was probably in a lot of distress. Owen wanted to make her feel better very badly, to let her know she had nothing to be ashamed of.

"We're all a risk. We all have something." Owen explained, determinate to make that courageous woman know she wasn't the only one. "I mean, I have my own version." He confessed, surprising himself with how easily the admission slipped his mouth. Somehow, seeing her like that made him feel comfortable enough to be completely honest about how he felt. "And it was different. It took a different toll. It still does, and I push through every day." Owen looked into her eyes, hoping she knew he was being sincere. "And I'm assuming you're doing the same thing, unless I see otherwise. Okay?"

"Okay." Amelia nodded with her head, letting him know she was in accord with what he'd said. As she watched her boss leave, her plans to scrub in were ignored for a moment.

She'd been meaning to talk to the chief since the previous week, but only today she'd had an opening. The neurosurgeon had spent the past few days trying to come up with what she was going to say, but in the first moment she'd had alone with Owen, his presence had made her forget everything about her rehearsed speech.

Amelia didn't know him that well but the little she did made her feel comfortable enough to open her heart about a subject that was really hard for her to talk about. Judging by what she'd learned about her boss in the previous couple of months, it didn't surprise her when he comprehensively listened to her. In the end, Owen even added that he had his own demons too.

She thought it was sweet and considerate of him to say that she wasn't the only one who had their skeletons in the closet, but Amelia wondered how okay he really was. Owen was her boss and he seemed to always be in control of everything around them, be it at the hospital where he ran a busy surgical service or at home, where he was always fixing things and making time to help others. With the exception of one night by the lake when she had been throwing rocks beside him, never had she seen Owen showing any signs of distress or being affected by something. But he was only human and of course he had feelings and his own personal issues too.

The guy was an enigma. He was controlled but intense, strict but understanding, rough but kind. Owen was always available, solved all problems, had everyone's back.

And Amelia wondered if anyone ever had his.

.

Later that day, the thought had already vanished off Amelia's mind as she kept busy carefully looking over some scans she had come to find out belonged to Nicole Herman, a prestigious fetal surgeon who worked in the hospital. Arizona Robbins hadn't said much about the case when she confessed to have stolen the images and Amelia had no idea who was following up with the treatment plan. She knew it was none of her business to keep digging but the neurosurgeon just couldn't get past the fact the tumor was one of the most challenging ones she had ever seen.

"Shepherd, you were looking for us?"

Amelia heard her boss' voice from behind her back and swiftly turned around, before closing the stolen images on the computer screen. Callie Torres stood beside him and at their request, she updated them on their patient's neurological status. Amelia had heard about what had happened with the soldier and she was aware that her boss was running a program with the orthopedic surgeon to help veterans. It was a cruel reality that a lot of the men and women who fought for the country came back and were left unassisted, especially some who had experienced very traumatic experiences. For the first time, she wondered what kind of things Owen had gone through while serving.

Amelia was too distracted with her own thoughts that she didn't realize her boss had stayed in the room after Callie left until she heard his voice.

"You have people, right?"

"What do you mean?" Amelia asked automatically, trying to focus back on what they had been discussing instead of the thoughts she was having.

"I just mean…" She noticed when Owen hesitated, as if looking for the right words. "I mean, you're not trying to…" Once again, he interrupted himself, finally looking her in the eye. "It's hard to deal with all this stuff on your own." Amelia knew he was talking about her addiction. "But you have Meredith and Derek, so…"

"Yeah." Amelia genuinely smiled, deeply touched by his concern. The realization that Owen seemed to understand more than she'd initially considered about going through a hard time added to his comment about having a similar situation earlier that day made Amelia once again wonder what was hidden in the depths of his past. "And meetings." She added, eager to let him know she was indeed in a better place than she had once been. "That's what we do." She intentionally added, taking a while to realize she had just found some common ground with him.

And it alarmed Amelia to realize how intimate that connection could be.

"Right." She heard him awkwardly agreeing, looking almost shy.

Owen had already turned around to leave when Amelia acted on an impulse.

"Do you?" She asked, belatedly realizing she'd gotten up in her eagerness not to break that fragile but meaningful bridge they were slowly creating between them. "Have people?"

"I'm… That's… Um, I'm fine."

Amelia noticed how uncomfortable he looked, at the same time her boss seemed somehow surprised. The fact he denied anything was wrong didn't surprise Amelia, for she had never expected Owen to instantly open up with her. She had long before noticed how reserved he was, but that didn't stop the neurosurgeon from speaking from the heart.

"No, I know." She answered him with a genuine smile, truly hoping she could somehow return what he'd done for her and the support he'd shown. Maybe they could be friends? Amelia surely could use a friend. She liked her brother and Meredith very much but she didn't really feel like they understood her. Not in the way her friends from LA did, anyway. But judging from what she'd seen, Owen was a person who definitely could. And Amelia desperately wanted to understand him too and reciprocate all the feelings he invoked in her. "But you're right there, living in that little tin box on my brother's back lawn… I mean, I keep saying I'm going to move out, but I'm still up at the house, watching them glare at each other." She confessed, suddenly excited with the idea of spending more time with Owen outside the walls of the hospital. The few times she had, the neurosurgeon had truly enjoyed the way she didn't really need to say a lot to feel understood. "Let me know if you, you know… If you need people." She smiled adorably at him. "I'm around."

"Thanks." Amelia noticed how her boss's tone of voice changed and his entire facial expression became sweeter, almost boyish. After seeing him acting so responsible all the time, she realized she really liked this unknown side of Owen Hunt. "Thanks. And thanks for the update."

As he left, Amelia took a deep breath and slowly let it out. The neurosurgeon could feel her chest pounding and her pulse racing but she told herself it probably had to do with the fact that she had almost been caught with stolen scans.

But later on, as Amelia was already focused back on studying Nicole Herman's MRI, she failed to notice that it hadn't exactly been the tumor that made her heart beat faster.

.

Owen strode around the halls of the hospital, enjoying the quietness of the hour. The past couple of weeks had been hectic with a lot of different things going on.

Along with running his war veterans project with Callie, Owen had to not only take on his usual responsibilities as chief but also log more hours in the ER because of April Kepner's pregnancy. But the trauma surgeon really didn't mind. For the first time in a while, he was feeling in a good place.

The fact that he'd just been able to go to one of the air vents and stand there by himself, enjoying the windy ride meant a lot, he thought. That was the secret place where he would take Cristina and up until then, he'd avoided going there because it brought painful memories. But today, it had felt differently. Owen didn't feel sad or heartbroken anymore. Now, Cristina was gone and even though Owen knew he was over her, that night he'd had the confirmation that after so many years of involvement with his ex-wife in an intoxicating relationship, his heart was finally at peace with their story and the way it had ended.

Earlier, he and Callie Torres had talked and joked for a while. Owen had confessed he'd had one night stands after his ex-wife was gone but he wasn't really sure he was ready to build something meaningful again. By having just divorced Arizona, Callie understood it well. It wasn't exactly that Owen didn't want to, he wanted more than anything to find that one person he could share his life with. But he'd come to a point when he wasn't sure anymore that he ever would.

Since he was young guy, Owen had always known that in order to be happy, he didn't really need extraordinary accomplishments. His validation had never come from the things he'd gotten, but rather from things he'd done, learned and shared. While most people tended to overlook and take for granted things like family and roots, those were the ones that attracted him the most. He didn't need much. A decent, meaningful job, a house and especially a family were everything he'd ever desired.

But Owen didn't want just any family. He wanted a woman he could connect to, on a deeper level. Someone who could go through life beside him, who could be there for better and for worse. If it was just to have a kid, he could easily get it done by knocking up a random woman. The idea didn't attract him at all because Owen wanted all or nothing. And he wasn't going to settle for any less than what he knew he deserved. He thought back about the conversation he'd had with Callie, when she'd wondered if they had already used up all their share of happiness for a lifetime. Owen hoped with every fiber of his being that his friend was utterly wrong, because his heart strived for more than what he'd ever gotten.

As he strode through the halls of the surgical floor pondering about that, the trauma surgeon spotted a dim light turned on in one of the skills lab. Assuming one of the residents had probably forgot to turn a piece of equipment off, he distractedly made his way in, surprised to find Amelia Shepherd silently sitting by one of the distant corners.

Owen's first impulse was to ask what she was doing, but the woman looked so focused that he didn't have the courage to interrupt her. For the past few weeks, ever since he'd given the okay for Amelia's complex plan to operate on Nicole Herman's massive tumor, it wasn't infrequent to find the neurosurgeon exhaustively going over the case.

Amelia had carefully explained her surgical approach to him and even though Owen had the medical knowledge to understand the idea behind her list of events, the technology she was using was very edgy. Since neurosurgery wasn't his field of study, even though he'd heard about the techniques, Owen had never really seen or been in direct contact with a lot of the methods she was using.

"Having fun?" After a few seconds observing her, Owen couldn't help asking with a sympathetic smile. It was the middle of the night and she was restlessly handling detailed machine equipment as if it were the middle of the afternoon.

At the sound of his voice, Amelia immediately looked up, surprised to find him there. The smile that formed on her lips when they made eye contact made Owen remember the way she had selflessly offered to be there for him in case he needed someone to talk to.

"Very much," The neurosurgeon confessed. She'd had a rough few weeks and as expected, tried to balance the excitement with her surgical plan and the insecurity that assaulted her every time she thought of actually executing the tumor removal.

Owen approached her with a few steps and Amelia noticed the gentle furrow on his eyebrows at the sight of what she was doing.

"It's a Cavitron ultrasonic surgical aspirator," She explained, wondering if he was familiar with it.

"CUSA," Owen nodded his head in agreement, showing her he knew what she was handling. "It's the latest model, isn't it?" He asked, thinking of the check he'd had to sign to acquire the new equipment a few weeks before.

"No, it's the one prior to that," Amelia answered as her dimples danced on her cheek. "The new toy you bought for me is carefully kept inside the OR. I wouldn't let the residents play with it here."

The way she spoke, obviously excited about the machine at the same time she showed gratitude made Owen tilt his head to gaze at her. The chief of surgery put his hands inside his coat pockets, too eager to stay in her company. Amelia's passion about that surgery had convinced him to sign off on it from the very start, but the way she donated herself to thoroughly studying and planning for it let Owen know he'd made the right decision.

"I'm glad you liked it," He confessed, knowing that if possible, he would buy a dozen new machines if it meant she would thank him with that smile every time.

"I was feeling kind of unmotivated earlier this week, but I kept pushing through," Amelia explained, using the words on purpose because she knew he'd get the reference. Seeing the question in his eyes, she promptly answered. "I don't know, I was just feeling like I was the odd one out because no one was getting the idea behind what I am trying to do." Owen frowned, offended and Amelia immediately corrected herself. "I don't mean you… I meant the residents." She explained, suppressing a giggle at how he softened his facial expression instantly. "But then I finally got around to find one that seems to be talented enough for this. Edwards saw the idea behind my plan."

"Edwards is the best in her year," Owen agreed with a head nod. "You couldn't have asked for a better partner. It's never good to try to make things work with someone who doesn't understand you."

Amelia wondered how much he really meant with the statement but his words quickly vanished in her mind as she bit her lower lip and mischievously smiled at him, determined to tease the guy. Owen clearly wasn't familiar with the approach she was using, even though he looked genuinely interested in it.

"Unless, of course you want to be my co surgeon," She suggested with an evil grin. "I can totally ditch Edwards and work with you," She added, thinking of the way his hands had once handled the inside of her car. Owen's entire physical structure seemed perfect for rough handwork, not at all the kind of talent a neurosurgeon could use.

Owen let out a shy chuckle, knowing she was pestering him on purpose.

"I can't take this opportunity away from Edwards," He replied playfully, knowing that was not at all the reason why he didn't engage in neurosurgery procedures more often.

"I'd ditch Edwards for you any day," Amelia replied unceremoniously.

"Really?" Owen narrowed his eyes in provocation, but deep down he couldn't help feeling flattered.

"You're the chief of surgery," Amelia smiled with mischief, shamelessly speaking her mind. "Imagine how many of these babies you could give me if I fell on your good graces." She patted the CUSA machine like it was her object of pride. Owen was trying not to think of what he wanted to give her when he heard the neurosurgeon adding. "Do you want to give it a try?"

It took him a couple of seconds to shift his thoughts from his mind to the reality in front of them. Amelia offered a very delicate probe with her hand, anxiously waiting for him to take it. Owen hesitated, frowning heavily at the same time he sat on a stool beside her and then finally accepted the object she was offering.

"It's not as complicated as it looks," Amelia got up and patiently explained, looking from her boss to the machinery in front of them. "All you have to do is reach the tumor area," she showed as she spoke, "and gently use this guy to suck the dead tissue," She pointed to the probe Owen was now holding, "think of it as playing a videogame." The neurosurgeon instructed with a smile.

Owen looked from her adorable smile to the computer graphic design in front of them, where he could test his skills at operating the expensive and cutting edge technology. At his first attempt to maneuvering the guiding system, he failed miserable. Amelia smiled with contentment at his frustration. It was interesting seeing Owen struggle with something because he had always been so assured and skilled that she was actually happy to see his hilarious attempts.

"I said gently," Amelia playfully reprimanded him with a chuckle. "If I did to Herman what you just did I'd give her a stroke."

"That's very encouraging," Owen replied ironically, but kept a genuine smile on his face when he turned his neck to the side.

Amelia's eyes met his and she laughed once again before telling him to give it another try.

"Gently!" She insisted, unable to withhold the fit of laughter that assaulted her after seeing how clumsy Owen was with a task that required accuracy.

"I am being gentle!" He said grumpily, but Owen wasn't in a bad mood. Much on the contrary, actually. He'd never known that actually being horrible at something could be so amusing.

Or maybe it had everything to do with the person standing beside him.

"If that's your gentle, then I don't want to find out your rough," Amelia lightheartedly confessed, noticing he seemed to be enjoying their bantering as much as she was. "Finesse is something you really need to work on, chief." She joked, patting his shoulder.

Owen was suddenly very aware of how close she stood. He was sitting on a very short stool and as Amelia bent over to inspect his work and give him instructions, they were pretty much at the same height. He became painfully conscious of the amazing smell in her hair. In an attempt to distract his body from the responses she was instilling in him, the trauma surgeon resorted to teasing.

"I am still wondering why the residents like you so much," He was clearly provoking her and didn't mean his words. "You are not nearly good at teaching as they say. All you do is make fun of me."

Owen was sure Amelia would pretend to be offended and quickly try to make it up to him. That's why her response surprised and amused him more than he could ever imagine.

"Well, don't pin this on me, it's just that you really suck at this," She smiled wickedly, making him laugh. "I am not saying you're bad. You're like…horrible." Her eyes met his and she laughed unceremoniously too. "You really do suck at this."

Owen was having too much fun to be offended. He acknowledged it with a head nod and couldn't hold his laughter after hearing the delicious sound of hers.

"I think I got your point," He replied acidly, but the smile lingering on his face was a telltale of his amusement.

"Don't move," Amelia instructed. After seeing he wasn't exactly following her instructions to go easy, not because he didn't want to, but because he couldn't, the neurosurgeon lost her patience and came forward, sneakily closing her right hand around his. "Close your eyes."

At the sound of her words, Owen did as told but what really got to him was the electrical buzz that ran through his entire body at the mere touch of her hand on his. He felt the way Amelia gently held his fingers still, trying to guide him through the procedure.

"Forget about the screen, just feel the movement of the probe first," The neurosurgeon didn't realize her voice was nearly a whisper. The lights in the room were very dim so the computer screen could stand out. Owen felt like he was being seduced at the sound of her voice and touch of her hand as she carefully gave out instructions. "Don't think about it, just feel it… Notice with your senses how it responds to your command."

How was he supposed to focus all his attention on handling the equipment when all he could think about was turning his head a little to the right, closing his eyes and testing all of his senses on her?

"Like this…" Amelia said with a sweet voice as her hand guided his, clearly satisfied with his improvement. "Excellent, that's much better."

"You know," Owen finally opened his lids. His gaze was far from the computer screen as he looked deeply into her silver blue eyes, recalling the way Amelia was always energetically moving around, "for someone who has a really hard time staying still, you can be surprisingly steady."

Amelia swallowed hard when she heard the warmth in his voice. His eyes were fixated on hers and not for the first time, she felt like his presence took up the entire room. Her hand was still on his fingers but she slowly released her grip at the same time Owen slowly stood up, suddenly engulfing her with his shadow.

"Thank you for the lesson," The chief of surgery said without breaking eye contact with her. The intensity of his stare made it really hard for Amelia to breathe.

Owen was mesmerized. His entire rational skills had abandoned him and all he could think about was the way he'd had the chance to kiss Amelia once and held back from it. That was definitely not going to happen again. The chief of surgery knew that if he thought too much about it, he would end up finding a hundred reasons to step back. But Owen didn't want to step back. Which is why that time, he let go completely, swiftly leaning forward as he allowed his senses to overcome his thoughts, exactly how she'd instructed him.

Amelia saw the fire in his eyes. The signals his body was sending were instantly captured and welcomed by hers. And she'd already closed her eyes, completely ready to embark on the touch of his lips that was surely about to come when the computer screen buzzed, suddenly alarming them.

The neurosurgeon pulled apart abruptly, breaking the magic of the moment. She noticed the disappointment in Owen's eyes but he was too polite to say anything. At the same time he cleared his throat, visibly uncomfortable for the obviousness of what was just about to do, Amelia hurried to explain:

"The program is doing some automatic updates."

"That's…" Owen awkwardly looked around, knowing he probably looked like an idiot with his face blushed. "Okay."

He wondered how the failed attempt of a kiss had completely transformed the bantering atmosphere into a heavy, sexually charged one. And it hurt to realize it wasn't the first time it happened.

"I should go home," Amelia rushed to say as she set off the computer. "I have a craniotomy scheduled at nine. Better get some sleep," She tried to keep a conversation flowing until they parted ways so they wouldn't have to acknowledge what'd just happened.

"Good," Owen said, belatedly realizing his reply made little to no sense. Why did she always seem to make him act like a fool?

"Do you need a ride home?"

"Nah, I am good," Owen dismissed her with a wave of his hands. "I'll see you around."

"See you," Amelia gathered her stuff and rushed to get out of the room.

It wasn't until she was finally away from his presence that the neurosurgeon allowed herself to exhale the deep breath she'd been holding. The situation between them was getting far too out of line.

At first, she'd been drawn to Owen by his magnetic powerful aura and the enigmas of his personality. But slowly, she'd started to actually feel things for him she couldn't quite identify. And Amelia realized the more she knew about the man, the more she liked. She had grown from not getting Owen to fully admiring the guy and now even liking him.

Amelia knew better than anyone of how dangerous that could be. The computer buzz had probably avoided a very complicated situation. She forbade her mind to think about her boss. Herman's surgery was complicated enough to keep her busy and the neurosurgeon surely didn't need that kind of distraction. Focusing on Owen Hunt at that moment or even giving him the slightest thought had the potential to turn her life into a disaster and Amelia wanted more than anything to remain in control of her emotions.

That was it, she thought. She was in control. Amelia was fully capable of dominating her thoughts and feelings, she'd come this far and wasn't going to take any steps back. Telling herself she was definitely not going to think about her boss anymore, Amelia left, anxious to leave the hospital and his presence.

But as she drove home through the empty streets that night, a pair of light blue eyes and the way Owen Hunt could easily make her relinquish control like he'd belonged in her life all along were pretty much the only things Amelia could think of.

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