I'm back by popular demand!

I love you guys, thanks for reading this story. I seriously would have given up if it wasn't for you, and for that I'm forever thankful. Tell me if you like the direction it's taking.

WhereIsTheBlack

Sarah ran down the stairs as fast as she could.

I was her fault. If she had drawn a line between her and Joey the first moment he had started displaying a strange behavior…

She shook her head with violence. There's no way of knowing what could've happened now. All that mattered was that no one was hurt. That what expected her in that tiny, dirty room on the first floor was nothing for her to be frightened of.

But who was she kidding? She was scared to death already. He stomach tied and untied itself with knots of nervousness.

"Sarah, wait!"

She didn't listen. Didn't stop. Flashes of people's faces ran through her mind like lightning. She felt responsible. She WAS responsible.

Once she reached the first floor, Erin had already caught up with her and had yanked her arm back with a tad bit of force.

"Listen to me," she said on edge, her controlled voice differing from Sarah's out-of-breath one. "Whatever is in there, could be dangerous to us, the building, or hell, even the whole neighborhood. We don't know what that asshole is capable of!"

"I need to see," Sarah insisted, retrieving her arm.

"No," Erin said sternly and with a hint of a shout. "What you need is to call the police if you want to help. You're a civilian Sarah, it's my job to protect you. Not to mention Connor put me in charge of you," she added, shaking her head. "There's no way I can let you go into that room."

"But-"

"Stop," Erin warned.

"I can't just sit back while you-"

"Yes, you can," she said taking hold of her shoulders. "You want to be held responsible for a gas explosion? A building collapse?" she said in a softer tone.

Sarah gulped. In her frenzied mind she had overlooked that possibility.

"Believe me, you don't. If there's anything you should see, I'll call you. But right now I need you to round up everyone and clear the building, okay?" she said, letting her arms drop.

Sarah debated on what to do. "But what about you?"

"I'll call backup."

Erin pulled out her phone dialing a number with haste, yet in a peaceful manner.

"But-"

"Sarah," she said turning to her, device to her ear. "Please, GO!"

The yell made her mind kick into action. She nodded fervently (more to herself than to Erin) and left her sight, calling and yelling at every door in the place.

Her mind was still elsewhere. On what could possibly be in that room. She prayed Heavens that Joey hadn't… that he…

Her phone rang. Connor.

"Connor," she said, out of breath.

"Hey baby. Everything okay with Lindsay?"

"I…" she sighed.

"What's wrong?"

"Come over. Something happened," she gulped. "I'm with Detective Lindsay, I'm okay," she added quickly before worrying him.

"I'll be there in five," said his now serious voice.

The police and Connor arrived coincidentally almost at the same time. Sarah turned towards the screeching tires of the familiar black Volvo with her arms around herself. Connor half-parked as he exited the car and trotted towards her, holding her close to him.

"What happened?" he asked with a clenched jaw, not looking at her, but at the officers.

"Joey was here. Left a message to check the laundry room."

Connor tensed slightly and drew apart to take a good look at her.

"Any idea of what that could mean?"

Sarah opened and closed her mouth. "Not really. Just something horrible."

Connor kissed her forehead briefly in comfort. "I'm going to talk to Lindsay, I'll be back in a second."

As he sprinted towards said woman, she turned towards a voice that called her.

She saw Nat and Will, both panting heavily and visibly shaken.

"What are you doing here?" asked Sarah worried.

"Jay told me what happened," Will said. "Are you okay?"

Sarah nodded, her brow still in a crease. She felt Nat's hand on her back as they all witnessed how policemen broke the door down after scanning for suspicious activity. Connor stood afar, covering his eyes with the sleeve of his lab coat as debris fell from one of the walls. One second later he was inside, following Lindsay up close.

Sarah felt upset at him for a moment. She knew he wasn't supposed to go in there. She felt her heart pound in her ears as she waited for them to come out, every other sound or sight becoming indistinct from her vision on the open door. She didn't have the time to process things clearly before a great number of officers bolted out the place, their hands covering their mouths and noses in disgust.

That was cue for Sarah to sprint towards said room, ignoring Will's calls and pushing Nat's hand away.

She climbed through the debris and spotted Connor staring straight downwards to a specific spot in the middle of the rubble. She walked up decidedly up to him before stopping dead on her tracks.

The smell. Something burning. Rotten.

She ignored her gag reflex as it insisted, practically begged, that she threw up. She held both hands to her mouth and nose as she approached Connor, Lindsay and Will's brother. She barely stole a peak before turning away as if shocked by a live wire.

Connor didn't comfort her. Sarah would be surprised if he had even noticed she was there. He was in a trance, his eyes unable to believe what lay in front of him.

"Wh-what is… that?"

Ahead of them lay a splatter of what could only be recognized as blood, charred bones, and visceral contents. The scene was gruesome and shocking to watch. Sarah saw blood and guts every day, but nothing compared to this. She could see extreme violence in the act. Anger. Hurt. Something done with malice.

Jay kneeled beside the crime scene in question, unable to call a certain answer.

"A cat," said Lindsay's faraway voice. Sarah turned to her and felt her stomach drop as the other woman held a striped, dismembered tail with her gloved hands, clearly upset and surprised.

"He… killed a cat." said Connor.

"Not just that," said Jay, angry and confused. "He blew it up."

Sarah closed her eyes with force, fighting tears. How could this be happening? How could a human being do this? She felt something on her chest she recognized as absolute terror.

"Wait. What is that?"

Amidst the horror lay a piece of paper. Jay stretched his arm to it, avoiding the splatter and retrieving the stained, white square and managing to open it carefully without ripping it. He stared at the paper for a few seconds before looking up at his girlfriend and holding it out to her.

"What does it say?" asked Sarah, stressed.

Jay diverted his eyes towards the door as he spotted Will and Nat approaching.

"Don't. Get her out of here," he barked at Will, signaling Nat with her head.

Will looked over to his brother and scanned his eyes through the people in the room before sighing and hurrying Nat and himself out before she could see anything.

"What does it say?" asked Connor this time.

"That's confidential," said Erin putting the paper away in a plastic bag, not looking at neither him nor Sarah. "This is now evidence and you are not allowed to-"

"Oh, bullshit!" yelled Sarah, cutting her off and startling everyone. She was done with not knowing things and people protecting her. "Cut the crap. I know it's for me. I KNOW. Read it," she said decidedly. "Believe me. It will do me worse not knowing."

"I'm afraid I-"

"Lindsay," interrupted Connor, angry.

The detective looked at her partner, stressed and unsure. Jay sighed, distressed, yet nodded slowly.

Erin sighed, angry at herself and angry at the bastard responsible before staring Sarah dead in the eye.

"It says: Look what you made me do".

Three days had gone by after what had happened at Sarah's apartment complex. She currently lay on one of the lounge's sofas, her arm draped across her forehead, her thoughts circling the scene that had given her bone-chilling nightmares since it had happened.

A couple of nurses rushed by, and she wasn't surprised to hear her name among the whispered chatter. She was not only in every single member of the hospital's staff mouths, but also a small report about her had been issued on yesterday's morning news.

Basically, Joey was now being searched by the police. Not consistently, though. A statement about his appearance and intentions was mentioned, warning Chicago about him and implying that if he was seen, he was to be reported immediately, for he was dangerous.

Sarah knew that was not going to stop him. She knew how far he could go. She wasn't safe.

She had been staying with Nat since it happened, amidst her own refusal. She didn't want to involve her in any way. She didn't want to involve anyone, because every single thing related to her, Joey could use against her. Her job, her friends, her relationship…

A kiss on her shoulder startled her.

She relaxed and half-smiled at the pair of blue eyes staring at her from behind the couch, but returned to her worried pose, crossing her arms over her chest as she stared at the ceiling, wondering if being serious would give her an answer to her predicament.

Connor had kneeled down so that he was on eye level with her. His chin rested on his left arm as he traced his index finger gently across her hair, messing with her curls indifferently.

Sarah kept her eyes shut, feeling herself relax. She tensed, though, when she felt the ghost of a trace on her lower lip. She opened her eyes wide and grasped Connor's sincerely concerned gaze over her as he withdrew his finger. She felt a pang on her heart when she noticed his eyes slightly begin to water. Was he crying for her? Was her situation that despicable? She felt guilty, but she wasn't going to tell him that. He would only try and comfort her.

She imagined what must be on his head right now: exhaustion, concern… fear. It was now her time to comfort him. But how?

"How are you feeling?" he asked, turning her chin gently to him so that he could kiss her.

She reveled into the kiss.

"I don't know how I'm feeling," she said, composed. She had to be honest with him.

He nodded to himself. "This is getting worse by the day."

"I know."

"I have to do something."

Sarah furrowed her brow. "What do you mean?"

"I mean I will not rest until he is behind bars. I will find him," The somber on his look scared her. This was only going to make things worse.

"I don't want you to-"

"I will. There's no way you can dissuade me, I'm sorry."

"You're sorry?" the girl asked, finally propping herself on her elbows so that she was closer to him. "Just what are you planning on doing? Track him? Chase him?" she asked unbelievingly.

"If I have to."

"Don't."

"Sarah…"

"Don't. Come away with me."

Connor looked at her like she had grown a second head.

"What?"

"Come with me. Away. Where he can't find us."

"Sarah-"

"I'm sure Will and Nat will be up for it. So will Ethan. So will April and Maggie. We were planning on a summer vacation to Maui, remember? Why not make it now?"

"But-"

"Come on! We need this. I need this. Consider it a 'spring break'", she begged, getting on her knees on the couch.

Connor smiled, but sobered instantly. "You know what the police said. It will be more difficult to protect you outside of Chicago."

Sarah shook her head. "So what does it matter what the police said? They won't stop him. Both you and I know it. We'll be safer far away. Please say yes. I can't stay here right now."

Connor looked at her deeply, his eyes unnerving, his brow set. He opened his mouth and closed it again, before finally speaking.

"We can't."

Sarah looked at him disbelievingly. "What do you mean we can't? Of course we can, we have a week off if-"

"We can't. You can't. If you leave Chicago, it will make it easier for him to target you."

"That's not true-"

"Yes, it is true, Sarah!" he said, irritated and standing up, visibly upset. "It's true, and you know it. I can't take that risk. I can't just nod and say you're right and that everything will be okay if we left because it won't. I can't lie to you about that or any other thing. You're safer here."

"But I don't want to be here!" Sarah replied in the same tone, rising up as well. "I don't want to stay in the same place where a psychopath could kill me. I can't. I need to leave."

Connor shook his head and took her face gently in his hands. "If you leave, he will follow you. You said so yourself, baby, he won't stop. He will follow you and hurt you. And if I'm not there-"

"Then come with me!" she cried out insistently, placing her own hands over his. "Come with me, and everything will be okay."

"I can't…"

"Why not?!" asked Sarah a tad louder, drawing the attention of some of the nurses and doctors passing by.

"Because I can't protect you! Okay? I can't be with you every second of the day, even though I'd love to!" he said, out of breath and with a raised voice, still holding on to her for life. "I couldn't forgive myself if anything happened to you. I love you, okay? Chicago P.D. gives me the security that you'll be safe. They'll watch your house, and you'll be watched here by all of us at the hospital. If you leave, you won't get that wherever you go. You'll be unprotected, and I can't allow that. I won't allow it."

Sarah retrieved her steps at his last statement.

"Allow," she said flatly. "You won't allow that I leave."

Connor clenched his jaw, but didn't backtrack from his words. He crossed his arms, and looked anywhere but at her, trying to find a sensible answer. Something that would convince her. But both knew well that battle was lost.

Sarah took a step forward, looking him dead in the eye. "I love you too, Connor Rhodes. But I'm leaving. I'm going away for a week whether you like it or not."

Connor furrowed his brow, upset. Sarah could see the disappointment in his eyes. This was not the first time they had fought, but it was the first time it was over something important.

"If that's your choice then there's nothing else to talk about."

Sarah remained silent, stung by his words and somewhat indifferent tone.

"Is there?" Connor pressed on.

Sarah looked up from the ground. "No, there is not."

Connor pursed his lips furiously. "Fine," he said in clenched teeth. "Make sure Will goes on your trip. He'll keep an eye on you."

Sarah looked at him, puzzled, and opened her mouth to speak but was interrupted.

"No, I won't be going," said Connor as if he had read her mind, a hand on the door handle.

Sarah closed her mouth shut, feeling anger claw at her skin and boil her blood. How could he be so indifferent now that the choice was made? Didn't he just say he wanted to protect her? Now he wasn't even considering coming with her. Why was he staying? It was all just too stupid.

Before she could stop and think, her following words, the result of furiousness and confusion, had caused Connor to look at her a mixture of hurt and disappointment that would haunt her until time's end.

"Don't worry. I wouldn't want you to. "

As she heard the door slam shut, she couldn't help the tears that, uninvited, escaped her eyes as she stared at the spot where he once had been.

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