p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Roy woke up and instantly wished that he hadn't. He blinked bleary eyes towards the clock, and it flashed 9:06am. Having not arrived home until just past 4 that morning, he was certainly feeling the exhaustion weighing down on him. His head ached and throbbed, his throat was dry and his breath stale./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"He made to sit up and the motion rocked his queasy stomach, frantically he kicked away the bed sheets and dashed to the adjoining bathroom. The meager contents of his stomach splattered in the toilet bowl and left him heaving, the stench of it left him retching long after it had finished coming up. He sat back on his haunches and rested the side of his face on the toilet seat, his eyes stared unseeingly ahead of him. He took a haggard breath./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"With one last painful cough, he shoved away from the toilet bowl and stood. He scrubbed a hand down his face and pondered his reflection in the mirror. He definitely looked worse for wear. He turned on the water to let it run cold, before splashing it over his face and rubbing along the back of his neck. His hair was greasy, his face pale and eyes weighed down with dark circles. "Happy fucking birthday to me," he sighed./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"After a quick shower that left him feeling a little less like death reheated, he stumbled to the kitchen to hunt for food. He craved something fatty and greasy and absolutely atrocious for him. Everyone knew that junk food was the only sure fire way to fend off the worst of a hangover./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"His moves were sluggish, his limbs felt weighed down, but he was long accustomed to the aftermath of a successful night of partying. He didn't remember all of what had happened the prior evening. Some of it came back to him in fits and starts, but he couldn't seem to put them in sequence. He didn't know the correct timeline for the events he could recall, but even so, he knew that there were a lot of things that were lost completely, black spots in his memory never to be recovered. Roy didn't think anything of it. It was par for the course with his weekends these days, and sometimes he was glad that he didn't have to remember, didn't have to dwell too much on his poor choices./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"The house was large, empty. It was lonely in the worst kind of way, long corridors and draughty rooms. Roy was there in the middle, alone. For the millionth time Roy missed the sense of community that had been a part of the Tachii'ni tribe, a sense of belonging that he'd always taken for granted when he had it. Maybe it was because it was his birthday, maybe it was brought on by the vulnerable nature of a hangover, but for whatever reason Roy felt a prickling behind his eyes that he hadn't felt in a long time. He huffed an incredulous breath and pushed forward, yanking open the fridge with more force than necessary. The contents was pitiful, very little there to satisfy his suddenly ravenous appetite. He'd have to raid the cupboards and make do./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"The brief swell of unwelcome melancholy had left him a little off-kilter. He needed a distraction, a slight stress relief. He needed a smoke. He quickly filled the kettle and set it on its hot plate, he dug a pot noodle out of the cupboard and sat it ready on the counter, before he set out to find his cigarettes whilst he waited for the water to boil. It didn't take him long to locate his jacket, and he tipped out the contents of his pockets. An almost empty pack of smokes, a lighter, a handful of change, his phone and a little plastic baggy stared up at him./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"He froze for a second. He never brought drugs back to the house. He never kept them on his person. He'd never taken them alone, it was a social thing, a recreational habit. It wasn't a big deal. Even without all his memories from the party, he knew without a second's hesitation that he had not put that in his pocket. It wasn't his. There wasn't much of it left, barely a single fix left in the bag. The white powder seemed so harmless in the daylight, like flour or sugar, so unremarkable in appearance. Despite his late night activities, Roy wasn't an expert on substances, he knew what the guys from the band taught him. He knew enough to not take anything from anyone who wasn't willing to do it themselves. But his bandmates had always taken the first hit before passing it along, and Roy put two and two together to come to the obvious conclusion that they wouldn't give him anything that was overly dangerous. Chuck was meticulous and knowledgeable. He always got his fix as safe as possible. He didn't shop around. He didn't snort through money, there's more germs on a one dollar bill than the average toilet seat. Roy trusted Chuck enough to know that if he was going to be doing this shit anyway, at least it was with someone who knew what they were talking about, someone like Chuck. Squinting at the powder now, Roy concluded that it was heroin. There was a time, not too long ago, that he wouldn't have been able to tell it and cocaine apart. But heroin was finer, and he remembered he and Chuck cramped in that bathroom with the cardboard tube as Chuck lectured about correct heroin use, that was how their night had started. But, that still left him with the question of what he was going to do about it now. He didn't want to keep it here if he could help it, but he didn't want to dispose of it either. With a huff he haphazardly shoved it back in his pocket and grabbed his smokes and his phone before turning his back./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"He stood outside the back door and sparked up. After he took a long drag of his cigarette, he began to relax. Almost as an afterthought, he checked his phone. He had a text from Chucky, it had been sent at just past 4am, probably shortly after they'd parted ways once the party was over./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"strong[text: Chuck]:/strong Enjoy the leftovers birthday boy! Dont say i never give you nothing! ;)/p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Roy furrowed his brow, confused for only a second before he recalled the mystery baggie in his pocket. He scoffed. span style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-weight: inherit; font-style: oblique; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;"Figures/span. "Happy fucking birthday to me," he repeated./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"After he'd taken a final drag of his cigarette he took the butt back inside, ran it under the cold tap to put it out and then swilled it down the waste disposal to get rid of it. He wasn't entirely sure what Oliver's stance on cigarettes was, and he wasn't eager to find out. At least in that one sense, it was fortunate that his guardian was never around. Even so, he wasn't eager to leave cigarette ends all over the garden. With a sigh he returned to the kettle and prepared his pot noodle. It was a little early for it, it was still an acceptable breakfast time, but there was little to eat in the house and he was too drained to extend much effort in food preparation./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"He glanced around the empty living room as he headed to take a seat. He remembered his birthdays on the reservation, presents ready for him on the rug in the middle of the room. Brave Bow would be so proud, so eager for his little Lost Arrow to enjoy his gifts. But Roy wasn't that same little kid anymore. That boy was gone. He thought back to the boy who'd gotten a skateboard and a tent and a backpack. But, the boy he was now had an empty sitting room and half a baggie of heroin. This was his life. It was heartbreaking. It was pathetic./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Pondering how drastically his life had changed, and how alone it had left him, made that sharp, stinging sensation behind his eyes return. Roy wasn't a crier, rarely shed a tear. He was often someone who channeled his more hard to handle emotions until reckless distractions, which - if he were being honest with himself - was what his whole life had become over the prior months, since he joined the band. He wasn't good at processing, and the added hindrance of being left alone to deal with things only made it harder./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"The red light on the answering machine blinked just like always, and with a stuttering breath in he pressed play. There was a brief moment of static, as if someone was moving the phone, before Dinah's voice sounded. "Good morning, birthday boy! I wish I could see you sooner, but I have a breakfast with a business associate." She sounded genuinely remorseful and Roy was so grateful for her. "Don't you worry though! You can't get rid of me that easy! I'll be over this evening to drive you crazy! How about we order pizza? My treat! And because I couldn't stand the thought of you having nothing to open when you woke up, I posted your card first thing as I drove past! I'll bring your present by later! Happy birthday! Have a great day!" Roy felt himself smile despite himself. It was comforting to know that someone cared./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"A resounding beep marked the end of the message and the next one started up immediately. This time Oliver's voice came through. "Happy birthday, kiddo!" He cheered, there was a lot of background noise wherever he was. For all Roy knew he was in a totally different time zone. Roy felt guilty for assuming the worst of his guardian, but for a brief moment he was surprised that Oliver had even remembered his birthday. "Sorry I can't spend it with you, but a kid your age probably doesn't want his old man hanging around anyway! I'm sure you'll have a fun time! I'll see ya! Be good!"/p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"As the message ended Roy sniffed, the tears became harder to keep at bay. Despite everything, he missed Ollie. He felt like a fool, a sniveling child. What kind of 17 year old boy was reduced to tears just because he was home alone? Most teens would think he had it made, would die to be in his situation, this big house all to their self with no supervision. Roy just wanted Oliver to ruffle his hair and give him a hard time for eating a pot noodle for breakfast. span style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-weight: inherit; font-style: oblique; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;"You ask for nothing, and he gives you less./span/p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Numbly, Roy retrieved the post from the doormat, his name written across a coloured envelope in Dinah's elegant script, the rest just bills and statements in Oliver's name. No card from Oliver, maybe it was still in the post, if he was in another country it would take longer to arrive. But as Roy opened the card from Dinah, and saw it signed 'Love Ollie Dinah x', in Dinah's hand, Roy knew that that was all he'd get. Oliver probably didn't even think about taking the time to sign his name and posting a card of his own to the boy who could be his son if he'd just take the time to be a father. Dinah must have known that too, and taken the time to try and rectify Oliver's mistake, same as always. It wasn't enough./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"He put the card face down on the counter, couldn't look at it a moment longer. He just wanted to forget. He just wanted, for even a second, to have some sort of distraction. In his peripheral he saw his jacket slung over the back of the sofa, and without thinking he retrieved the baggie. On auto-pilot he walked into the kitchen, he tipped the powder out onto a sheet of foil, emulating Chuck's actions from the prior evening, and making necessary substitutes to accommodate for the lack of an extra pair of hands, Roy set up his fix. He placed the foil atop a baker's cooling rack, stood it over the gas hob and turned it on low. He took the few remaining sheets off of the kitchen roll, and gathered the powder into a pile small enough to fit the mouth of the cardboard tube around it. He lowered his mouth to the open end of the tube and smoked quickly./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"If he was in a better frame of mind, Roy might have considered that doing drugs in a non-social setting could be dangerous for him. Substances affect different users differently, everything from mood to diet can alter the outcome. Drugs with the guys from the band was one thing, a party, a celebratory, recreational habit. They fed off of each other's enthusiasm and lessened the comedown with alcohol or weed. It was easier to handle. But getting high alone as a way to ward off his sadness was a whole different kettle of fish. But he wasn't thinking in terms of logic. He was thinking about instant gratification. He was thinking in terms of immediate results. He just didn't want to feel like this right now. He just couldn't dwell on the things in his life that went wrong./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Once he was finished he cleaned away all evidence of what he'd done. And within the next 20 minutes he was blissfully ignorant to all the negative feelings that had previously plagued him. He snorted as he spied the card on the counter, "Fuck him," he laughed. Who needed Oliver Queen anyway?/p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"With the knowledge that Dinah would be stopping by that evening, Roy set about getting the house in order. He was boundless in energy and was eager to do something, too restless to do nothing. He put his clothes from the prior night in the washing machine, even his jacket, the residual stench of booze and cigarette smoke would not go unnoticed by Dinah. He turned his playlist up to high volume and got to work. And if he used the hoover to air guitar along to 'span style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-weight: inherit; font-style: oblique; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;"Renegade/span' by Styx, well, no one was around to call him on it. It was certainly better than weeping over a stupid fucking birthday card./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"It was an hour or two later, and the last remaining task was the dirty dishes. He always put them off as long as possible, the texture of soggy food always made his skin crawl. It had been building up for a few days now and Roy sighed, he'd just made a larger job for himself. As he methodically washed one item after another, taking the time to dry and put away each before returning to the sink - effectively tackling three jobs at once - his mind wandered. He felt run down and his head ached, he couldn't tell if it was residual from his earlier hangover or a result of the heroin comedown, perhaps a combination of the two./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"He thought back over Oliver's message, the card with his name written in Dinah's hand. Roy had managed to successfully avoid his feelings for a couple of blessed hours, but now he had nothing but his thoughts to occupy him, nothing but the painstaking truth that no matter what he did, he wasn't good enough. Maybe he was the problem. Maybe if he wasn't around Oliver would come home. He was keeping Oliver from his own house, keeping him away from Dinah. Oliver had probably felt obligated to take him in, couldn't turn him away. Oliver had done more for him than he'd had to and Roy had just grown to resent him at every turn. What kind of person did that make him? To live in a man's house and be provided for without question, and then curse that same man whenever his back was turned. No wonder Oliver didn't want him. No wonder he'd ended up alone./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"He felt the sting of tears once again and was so frustrated that he'd seemingly lost his composure so many times in a single day. Maybe things would be better off if he wasn't here, but he had nowhere to go, and wasn't entirely sure that he would feel better anywhere else even if he could leave. He blinked rapidly to dispel the urge to weep, and continued to wash the few remaining dishes. He gripped the handle of a kitchen knife as he redrew it from the water, he wiped away the suds as he cleaned it./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"So preoccupied was he with his emotional downward spiral, he didn't take enough care in how he handled the blade, and sliced his finger with a sharp and immediate sting. He jumped back, and dropped the knife back into the water. He stared bewildered for a prolonged second at the open wound, a thin line that seemed far too small for the flow of blood it seemed to be letting loose. Without thought he retrieved the knife once more, he stared at the edge that had done the damage, stared at the blood still dripping, running down his palm, over his upturned wrist. span style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-weight: inherit; font-style: oblique; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;"Maybe things would be simpler. Better./span He angled the blade down./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"A knock at the door brought him back to himself. He jumped in place, the knife clattered to the draining board with a metallic clang. "Fuck," he hissed. He blinked a few times to clear his head, suddenly overwhelmed by the direction his thoughts had taken, his skin felt too tight and his chest felt like it was burning. The knock resounded again./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"He yanked the door open, surprised to find Jason there. "Happy Birthday!" His friend greeted enthusiastically. It took Roy a second to comprehend, before he remembered his plans to spend the afternoon with Jay. The morning had been an emotional rollercoaster, he couldn't be blamed for forgetting. "Roy?" The younger boy spoke up again, his voice laced with concern and his brow furrowed./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Roy shook himself mentally and forced on a smile. "Thanks," he said. He stepped back to welcome Jason inside./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Jason followed him in and opened his mouth to speak, but he stopped abruptly, his eyes wide and horrified, his mouth still agape. "Roy, holy shit, are you okay?" He stepped closer, lifting Roy's hand with a touch so delicate it was alarming. He cradled Roy's hand gently, turning it up to the light so he could inspect the wound. Roy had to concede that the line of red marring his forearm, running down from his finger, that was slowly drying against his skin, did leave it looking a little nightmarish./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""I'm fine. I just sliced it in the kitchen s'all, looks way worse than it is." He tried to placate./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Jason ran a thumb along the joint of Roy's wrist and smiled softly up at him. "We should get this cleaned up so you can open your presents. Don't want blood all over 'em."/p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Roy was tired, aching. His eyes felt heavy and he wanted to sleep. He was fed up of feeling close to tears and he doubted he'd be good company for anyone. But, Jason being so enthusiastic about his birthday, showing up with presents and a smile and showing such care, it made a warmth ignite in Roy's chest. Maybe his birthday could be salvaged yet./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"He made to sit up and the motion rocked his queasy stomach, frantically he kicked away the bed sheets and dashed to the adjoining bathroom. The meager contents of his stomach splattered in the toilet bowl and left him heaving, the stench of it left him retching long after it had finished coming up. He sat back on his haunches and rested the side of his face on the toilet seat, his eyes stared unseeingly ahead of him. He took a haggard breath./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"With one last painful cough, he shoved away from the toilet bowl and stood. He scrubbed a hand down his face and pondered his reflection in the mirror. He definitely looked worse for wear. He turned on the water to let it run cold, before splashing it over his face and rubbing along the back of his neck. His hair was greasy, his face pale and eyes weighed down with dark circles. "Happy fucking birthday to me," he sighed./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"After a quick shower that left him feeling a little less like death reheated, he stumbled to the kitchen to hunt for food. He craved something fatty and greasy and absolutely atrocious for him. Everyone knew that junk food was the only sure fire way to fend off the worst of a hangover./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"His moves were sluggish, his limbs felt weighed down, but he was long accustomed to the aftermath of a successful night of partying. He didn't remember all of what had happened the prior evening. Some of it came back to him in fits and starts, but he couldn't seem to put them in sequence. He didn't know the correct timeline for the events he could recall, but even so, he knew that there were a lot of things that were lost completely, black spots in his memory never to be recovered. Roy didn't think anything of it. It was par for the course with his weekends these days, and sometimes he was glad that he didn't have to remember, didn't have to dwell too much on his poor choices./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"The house was large, empty. It was lonely in the worst kind of way, long corridors and draughty rooms. Roy was there in the middle, alone. For the millionth time Roy missed the sense of community that had been a part of the Tachii'ni tribe, a sense of belonging that he'd always taken for granted when he had it. Maybe it was because it was his birthday, maybe it was brought on by the vulnerable nature of a hangover, but for whatever reason Roy felt a prickling behind his eyes that he hadn't felt in a long time. He huffed an incredulous breath and pushed forward, yanking open the fridge with more force than necessary. The contents was pitiful, very little there to satisfy his suddenly ravenous appetite. He'd have to raid the cupboards and make do./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"The brief swell of unwelcome melancholy had left him a little off-kilter. He needed a distraction, a slight stress relief. He needed a smoke. He quickly filled the kettle and set it on its hot plate, he dug a pot noodle out of the cupboard and sat it ready on the counter, before he set out to find his cigarettes whilst he waited for the water to boil. It didn't take him long to locate his jacket, and he tipped out the contents of his pockets. An almost empty pack of smokes, a lighter, a handful of change, his phone and a little plastic baggy stared up at him./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"He froze for a second. He never brought drugs back to the house. He never kept them on his person. He'd never taken them alone, it was a social thing, a recreational habit. It wasn't a big deal. Even without all his memories from the party, he knew without a second's hesitation that he had not put that in his pocket. It wasn't his. There wasn't much of it left, barely a single fix left in the bag. The white powder seemed so harmless in the daylight, like flour or sugar, so unremarkable in appearance. Despite his late night activities, Roy wasn't an expert on substances, he knew what the guys from the band taught him. He knew enough to not take anything from anyone who wasn't willing to do it themselves. But his bandmates had always taken the first hit before passing it along, and Roy put two and two together to come to the obvious conclusion that they wouldn't give him anything that was overly dangerous. Chuck was meticulous and knowledgeable. He always got his fix as safe as possible. He didn't shop around. He didn't snort through money, there's more germs on a one dollar bill than the average toilet seat. Roy trusted Chuck enough to know that if he was going to be doing this shit anyway, at least it was with someone who knew what they were talking about, someone like Chuck. Squinting at the powder now, Roy concluded that it was heroin. There was a time, not too long ago, that he wouldn't have been able to tell it and cocaine apart. But heroin was finer, and he remembered he and Chuck cramped in that bathroom with the cardboard tube as Chuck lectured about correct heroin use, that was how their night had started. But, that still left him with the question of what he was going to do about it now. He didn't want to keep it here if he could help it, but he didn't want to dispose of it either. With a huff he haphazardly shoved it back in his pocket and grabbed his smokes and his phone before turning his back./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"He stood outside the back door and sparked up. After he took a long drag of his cigarette, he began to relax. Almost as an afterthought, he checked his phone. He had a text from Chucky, it had been sent at just past 4am, probably shortly after they'd parted ways once the party was over./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"strong[text: Chuck]:/strong Enjoy the leftovers birthday boy! Dont say i never give you nothing! ;)/p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Roy furrowed his brow, confused for only a second before he recalled the mystery baggie in his pocket. He scoffed. span style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-weight: inherit; font-style: oblique; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;"Figures/span. "Happy fucking birthday to me," he repeated./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"After he'd taken a final drag of his cigarette he took the butt back inside, ran it under the cold tap to put it out and then swilled it down the waste disposal to get rid of it. He wasn't entirely sure what Oliver's stance on cigarettes was, and he wasn't eager to find out. At least in that one sense, it was fortunate that his guardian was never around. Even so, he wasn't eager to leave cigarette ends all over the garden. With a sigh he returned to the kettle and prepared his pot noodle. It was a little early for it, it was still an acceptable breakfast time, but there was little to eat in the house and he was too drained to extend much effort in food preparation./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"He glanced around the empty living room as he headed to take a seat. He remembered his birthdays on the reservation, presents ready for him on the rug in the middle of the room. Brave Bow would be so proud, so eager for his little Lost Arrow to enjoy his gifts. But Roy wasn't that same little kid anymore. That boy was gone. He thought back to the boy who'd gotten a skateboard and a tent and a backpack. But, the boy he was now had an empty sitting room and half a baggie of heroin. This was his life. It was heartbreaking. It was pathetic./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Pondering how drastically his life had changed, and how alone it had left him, made that sharp, stinging sensation behind his eyes return. Roy wasn't a crier, rarely shed a tear. He was often someone who channeled his more hard to handle emotions until reckless distractions, which - if he were being honest with himself - was what his whole life had become over the prior months, since he joined the band. He wasn't good at processing, and the added hindrance of being left alone to deal with things only made it harder./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"The red light on the answering machine blinked just like always, and with a stuttering breath in he pressed play. There was a brief moment of static, as if someone was moving the phone, before Dinah's voice sounded. "Good morning, birthday boy! I wish I could see you sooner, but I have a breakfast with a business associate." She sounded genuinely remorseful and Roy was so grateful for her. "Don't you worry though! You can't get rid of me that easy! I'll be over this evening to drive you crazy! How about we order pizza? My treat! And because I couldn't stand the thought of you having nothing to open when you woke up, I posted your card first thing as I drove past! I'll bring your present by later! Happy birthday! Have a great day!" Roy felt himself smile despite himself. It was comforting to know that someone cared./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"A resounding beep marked the end of the message and the next one started up immediately. This time Oliver's voice came through. "Happy birthday, kiddo!" He cheered, there was a lot of background noise wherever he was. For all Roy knew he was in a totally different time zone. Roy felt guilty for assuming the worst of his guardian, but for a brief moment he was surprised that Oliver had even remembered his birthday. "Sorry I can't spend it with you, but a kid your age probably doesn't want his old man hanging around anyway! I'm sure you'll have a fun time! I'll see ya! Be good!"/p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"As the message ended Roy sniffed, the tears became harder to keep at bay. Despite everything, he missed Ollie. He felt like a fool, a sniveling child. What kind of 17 year old boy was reduced to tears just because he was home alone? Most teens would think he had it made, would die to be in his situation, this big house all to their self with no supervision. Roy just wanted Oliver to ruffle his hair and give him a hard time for eating a pot noodle for breakfast. span style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-weight: inherit; font-style: oblique; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;"You ask for nothing, and he gives you less./span/p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Numbly, Roy retrieved the post from the doormat, his name written across a coloured envelope in Dinah's elegant script, the rest just bills and statements in Oliver's name. No card from Oliver, maybe it was still in the post, if he was in another country it would take longer to arrive. But as Roy opened the card from Dinah, and saw it signed 'Love Ollie Dinah x', in Dinah's hand, Roy knew that that was all he'd get. Oliver probably didn't even think about taking the time to sign his name and posting a card of his own to the boy who could be his son if he'd just take the time to be a father. Dinah must have known that too, and taken the time to try and rectify Oliver's mistake, same as always. It wasn't enough./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"He put the card face down on the counter, couldn't look at it a moment longer. He just wanted to forget. He just wanted, for even a second, to have some sort of distraction. In his peripheral he saw his jacket slung over the back of the sofa, and without thinking he retrieved the baggie. On auto-pilot he walked into the kitchen, he tipped the powder out onto a sheet of foil, emulating Chuck's actions from the prior evening, and making necessary substitutes to accommodate for the lack of an extra pair of hands, Roy set up his fix. He placed the foil atop a baker's cooling rack, stood it over the gas hob and turned it on low. He took the few remaining sheets off of the kitchen roll, and gathered the powder into a pile small enough to fit the mouth of the cardboard tube around it. He lowered his mouth to the open end of the tube and smoked quickly./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"If he was in a better frame of mind, Roy might have considered that doing drugs in a non-social setting could be dangerous for him. Substances affect different users differently, everything from mood to diet can alter the outcome. Drugs with the guys from the band was one thing, a party, a celebratory, recreational habit. They fed off of each other's enthusiasm and lessened the comedown with alcohol or weed. It was easier to handle. But getting high alone as a way to ward off his sadness was a whole different kettle of fish. But he wasn't thinking in terms of logic. He was thinking about instant gratification. He was thinking in terms of immediate results. He just didn't want to feel like this right now. He just couldn't dwell on the things in his life that went wrong./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Once he was finished he cleaned away all evidence of what he'd done. And within the next 20 minutes he was blissfully ignorant to all the negative feelings that had previously plagued him. He snorted as he spied the card on the counter, "Fuck him," he laughed. Who needed Oliver Queen anyway?/p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"With the knowledge that Dinah would be stopping by that evening, Roy set about getting the house in order. He was boundless in energy and was eager to do something, too restless to do nothing. He put his clothes from the prior night in the washing machine, even his jacket, the residual stench of booze and cigarette smoke would not go unnoticed by Dinah. He turned his playlist up to high volume and got to work. And if he used the hoover to air guitar along to 'span style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-weight: inherit; font-style: oblique; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;"Renegade/span' by Styx, well, no one was around to call him on it. It was certainly better than weeping over a stupid fucking birthday card./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"It was an hour or two later, and the last remaining task was the dirty dishes. He always put them off as long as possible, the texture of soggy food always made his skin crawl. It had been building up for a few days now and Roy sighed, he'd just made a larger job for himself. As he methodically washed one item after another, taking the time to dry and put away each before returning to the sink - effectively tackling three jobs at once - his mind wandered. He felt run down and his head ached, he couldn't tell if it was residual from his earlier hangover or a result of the heroin comedown, perhaps a combination of the two./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"He thought back over Oliver's message, the card with his name written in Dinah's hand. Roy had managed to successfully avoid his feelings for a couple of blessed hours, but now he had nothing but his thoughts to occupy him, nothing but the painstaking truth that no matter what he did, he wasn't good enough. Maybe he was the problem. Maybe if he wasn't around Oliver would come home. He was keeping Oliver from his own house, keeping him away from Dinah. Oliver had probably felt obligated to take him in, couldn't turn him away. Oliver had done more for him than he'd had to and Roy had just grown to resent him at every turn. What kind of person did that make him? To live in a man's house and be provided for without question, and then curse that same man whenever his back was turned. No wonder Oliver didn't want him. No wonder he'd ended up alone./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"He felt the sting of tears once again and was so frustrated that he'd seemingly lost his composure so many times in a single day. Maybe things would be better off if he wasn't here, but he had nowhere to go, and wasn't entirely sure that he would feel better anywhere else even if he could leave. He blinked rapidly to dispel the urge to weep, and continued to wash the few remaining dishes. He gripped the handle of a kitchen knife as he redrew it from the water, he wiped away the suds as he cleaned it./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"So preoccupied was he with his emotional downward spiral, he didn't take enough care in how he handled the blade, and sliced his finger with a sharp and immediate sting. He jumped back, and dropped the knife back into the water. He stared bewildered for a prolonged second at the open wound, a thin line that seemed far too small for the flow of blood it seemed to be letting loose. Without thought he retrieved the knife once more, he stared at the edge that had done the damage, stared at the blood still dripping, running down his palm, over his upturned wrist. span style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-weight: inherit; font-style: oblique; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;"Maybe things would be simpler. Better./span He angled the blade down./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"A knock at the door brought him back to himself. He jumped in place, the knife clattered to the draining board with a metallic clang. "Fuck," he hissed. He blinked a few times to clear his head, suddenly overwhelmed by the direction his thoughts had taken, his skin felt too tight and his chest felt like it was burning. The knock resounded again./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"He yanked the door open, surprised to find Jason there. "Happy Birthday!" His friend greeted enthusiastically. It took Roy a second to comprehend, before he remembered his plans to spend the afternoon with Jay. The morning had been an emotional rollercoaster, he couldn't be blamed for forgetting. "Roy?" The younger boy spoke up again, his voice laced with concern and his brow furrowed./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Roy shook himself mentally and forced on a smile. "Thanks," he said. He stepped back to welcome Jason inside./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Jason followed him in and opened his mouth to speak, but he stopped abruptly, his eyes wide and horrified, his mouth still agape. "Roy, holy shit, are you okay?" He stepped closer, lifting Roy's hand with a touch so delicate it was alarming. He cradled Roy's hand gently, turning it up to the light so he could inspect the wound. Roy had to concede that the line of red marring his forearm, running down from his finger, that was slowly drying against his skin, did leave it looking a little nightmarish./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;""I'm fine. I just sliced it in the kitchen s'all, looks way worse than it is." He tried to placate./p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Jason ran a thumb along the joint of Roy's wrist and smiled softly up at him. "We should get this cleaned up so you can open your presents. Don't want blood all over 'em."/p
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-size: 15.12px; font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px; line-height: 1.5; color: #2a2a2a;"Roy was tired, aching. His eyes felt heavy and he wanted to sleep. He was fed up of feeling close to tears and he doubted he'd be good company for anyone. But, Jason being so enthusiastic about his birthday, showing up with presents and a smile and showing such care, it made a warmth ignite in Roy's chest. Maybe his birthday could be salvaged yet./p