Title: The ARK Angels of DX and the Ten Bridesmaids
Author: Kaykyaka
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the WWE and TNA characters used within this fictional story. No copyright infringement is intended and no money is being made by this work of fiction.
Ratings: K
Characters: Shawn, Cameron and Cheyenne Michaels, Amy 'Lita' Dumas Michaels, Hunter Hurst Helmsley, LC Helmsley, Aurora Rose Helmsley, Chyna, Trish Stratus, Melina and Johnny 'Nitro' Hennigan, Randy Orton, Carlito, Edge, Ric Flair, Batista, Torrie Wilson, the Hardyz, Ashley, Candice Michelle, Shelton Benjamin, Krystal Marshall, Maria, John Cena, Rey Mysterio, Angie Mysterio, Dominic and Aaliyah Mysterio, Vickie Guerrero, Sting, Kurt Angle, LAX, the Kliq and the TNA roster.
Summary: Krystal has narrowed her bridesmaids list down to 5 WWE Divas and 5 TNA Knockouts but will any of them make it to the wedding? Find out in the next adventure of the ARK Angels of DX.
Chapter Eight – 8 Days: Hollywood Hemme
First National Bank, North Hollywood, Los Angeles, CA, 10am:
Dozens of police cars gathered outside First National Bank which had been held up by bank robbers who weren't going anywhere anytime soon, in fact they had let all the customers go and there was just one remaining now and her name was Christy Hemme. The TNA Knockout sat on a chair tapping her foot impatiently waiting to be released from the men pointing guns at her. The guys pointing the guns weren't real bank robbers either, they were Jimmie Rave and Lance Hoyt better known as the Rock and Rave Infection and they had turned into monsters seemingly overnight all because of Jeff Jarrett. It was bad enough that they had kidnapped her after she convinced Matt Hardy that he could trust them, now they wanted to make sure she never saw the light of day ever again.
"Forget it guys I'm not going to jail for holding up a bank," she said adamantly.
"Why not? You'll only be gone for a few years, by then Matt Hardy would have moved on and forgotten all about you," Lance Hoyt said from under his disguise and Christy stared at him in disgust wondering where her friend Lance Hoyt had disappeared and who this heartless human being was standing in front of her.
"Actually I believe holding up a bank carries a 5-10 year jail sentence," Christy corrected him.
"They won't keep a pretty girl like you in for that long, you'll be out before your 30th birthday," Jimmie Rave assured her.
"I said I'm not doing it now let me go!" Christy Hemme said furiously.
"Can't do that Christy, if you go back to Matt Hardy we would have failed our company," Lance Hoyt said and Jimmie Rave nodded while Christy pulled her hair out in frustration.
"I cannot believe what I am hearing, you want me to go to jail so I don't see Matt Hardy?" she said overwhelmed by how stupid her wrestling buddies had become.
"That's right your relationship is a disgrace to everything our company stands for," Jimmie Rave said and Christy Hemme folded her arms resolutely.
"Well tough I'm not going to stop seeing him, in fact I bet Matt would even visit me in prison," Christy bragged and Rock and Rave didn't like the sound of that one bit.
"She's right what do we do?" Jimmie asked Lance.
"We go back to the original plan," Lance Hoyt said and Christy started to get nervous.
"What's the original plan?" she asked not wanting to know figuring whatever it was must have been worse than this plan.
"If we can't lock you away in jail, we'll just have to pull a Thelma and Louise," Lance Hoyt said.
"A Thelma and Louise, what's that?" Christy Hemme asked now confused.
"Remember what happened when the police surrounded Thelma and Louise at the end of the movie?" Jimmie Rave asked her and Christy's stomach flipped in terror.
"You guys are crazy!" she said shoving Jimme back hard and his gun fell out of his hand. Christy stared at it in disbelief, "This gun is fake!" she said and suddenly with adrenaline running through her body she ran out of the bank slamming the doors in the faces of Rock and Rave who groaned in pain, then she jumped over the police cars and ran all the way down the street. Lance Hoyt pulled Jimmie up by his shirt, jumped over the police cars and ran after her.
"After them they're armed and dangerous!" the police chief yelled and the officers followed Rock and Rave down the street.
"Watch it!" a man said as Christy ran into him, she turned and saw Rock and Rave coming behind her and threw the man into them sending them crashing to the floor. She ducked and dived through all the people who were crowding the street, she wanted to call Matt but she didn't have his cell number, she had Krystal's though but her fingers were shaking so bad she could hardly dial the number and she dropped the cell phone on the ground.
"Krystal?" she said picking up the phone but then she saw Rock and Rave heading towards her fast and couldn't talk.
"Would you like some ice cream ma'am?" an ice cream vendor said to her.
"Yes I'd like the whole cart!" Christy replied and shoved the gelato stand into Rock and Rave and trapped them underneath it.
"Look what you did to my ice cream stand you little punk!" the ice cream vendor yelled at Christy Hemme who was bolting down the street dialing her cell-phone again.
"Krystal is that you? Tell Matt I'm not mad at him okay?" Christy said panting furiously, "Krystal can you hear me?" she said but the connection broke down and she got cut off, "Oh great now what am I gonna do?" Christy sighed, she saw a bus up ahead and it was heading to LAX so she ran for it. She got on almost completely out of breath and the bus driver knew something was wrong.
"Are you okay ma'am?" he asked.
"No I'm being chased by a couple of guys that I thought were my friends," Christy explained and saw Rock and Rave heading for the bus, "Those guys right there!" Christy said pointing to them, "Don't let them on!"
"Okay-okay," the driver said and went to close the door when Lance Hoyt stuck his foot between the gap and pointed his fake gun at the driver.
"Get off the bus!" Lance Hoyt yelled and the passengers screamed.
"Is this the girl you want?" the driver asked pointing to Christy.
"Yeah," Lance said and the driver pushed Christy onto him.
"Well take her and get the Hell off my bus!" the driver said and Christy stared at him in disbelief while Lance and Jimmie laughed pulling a kicking and screaming Christy Hemme off the bus.
"Their guns are fake!" Christy yelled out but the driver didn't listen.
"Thank you Mr. Bus Driver!" Lance Hoyt said as the bus drove off taking Christy's faith in the kindness of strangers along with him.
"Hail to the bus driver!" Jimmie Rave said and pointed his fake gun at a car driver, "GET OUT!" he yelled and the frightened man listened and Rock and Rave got in and threw a frightened Christy Hemme in the back.
"Somebody call the police!" the man said then saw the torrent of police cars coming from behind as Rock and Rave drove away onto the Santa Ana Freeway heading for the Grand Canyon to make their big finish and end Matt and Christy forever.
8 hours later . . .
Police in Coconino, Arizona had been informed of the bank robbers holding a woman hostage that had come through California and didn't seem to be planning on stopping anytime soon.
"What are these guys doing?" the police officer said into his police radio, "It looks like they're heading to the Grand Canyon why do they want to go there?"
Christy Hemme was wondering the same-thing unfortunately she knew the answer, Rock and Rave wanted to drive her off the cliff while they got out just in the nick of time. She banged on the car door and tried to kick it open but it was no use.
"Guys you're crazy please don't do this!" she begged them frightened.
"Sorry Christy it's the only way we can stop you seeing Matt Hardy," Lance Hoyt said.
"Unless you swear on your mother's life that you will stop seeing him," Jimmie Rave said but Christy shook her head, there was no way she was gonna swear to that and Jimmie Rave shrugged, "So be it," he said and Christy wiped the tears from her eyes and prayed Psalm 59 as Lance and Jimmie burned towards the canyon at full speed with no signs of slowing down.
Rescue me from my enemies, O God.
Protect me from those who have come to destroy me.
Rescue me from these criminals;
save me from these murderers.
They have set an ambush for me.
Fierce enemies are out there waiting, Lord,
though I have not sinned or offended them.
I have done nothing wrong,
yet they prepare to attack me.
Wake up! See what is happening and help me!"
"What is that sound?" Jimmie asked Lance slowing down and Lance looked at him like he was crazy.
"What are you doing speed up we're almost there!" he insisted but Jimmie couldn't move anymore and Lance stepped over him into the driver's seat but when he tried to accelerate he couldn't, it was as if something was stopping the car from moving and that's when he heard it; the majestic sound of that ten string harp he heard back at First Baptist Church in Orlando, Florida. It was the most beautiful sound he had ever heard and Christy Hemme smiled as the car came to a complete stop just inches from the canyon. She got out and ran towards the sound and saw Cheyenne playing the harp at the side of the Grand Canyon and headed towards her thanking God for answering her prayer while the police arrested Rock and Rave.
"You got here just in time!" she said to Cheyenne kissing her all over and the angelic cherub laughed.
"You're pretty," she said and Christy pinched her cheek before throwing her arms around Matt who was glad she was okay and as perky as ever.
"I can't believe I let you get away," he said feeling bad still but Christy kissed him so passionately he forgot that she had been missing.
"Whoa and I thought Arizona was hot," Shelton said and everyone nodded watching Matt and Christy kiss. Christy eventually pulled away and skipped over to Lance and Jimmie who were being put into the police car and taken back to California.
"Don't worry guys they'll go real easy on two pretty boys like you," she teased them and stuck her tongue out at them before skipping back over to Matt Hardy.
"You're making a big mistake Christy, Double J's not done with you yet you'll see!" Lance Hoyt cried out.
"Okay let's go," the police officer said putting Lance Hoyt in the car and Christy Hemme turned to the ARK Angels and they knew what she was wondering.
"Yes its okay for you and Matt to see each other, you're fine now we found you so enjoy yourselves kids," Cameron said and Matt and Christy embraced feeling free to enjoy each other's company without worrying about Jeff Jarrett trying to ruin their fun. The other bridesmaids looked at their WWE admirers feeling the same way, even if they were cooped up in the back of a van driving hours across the country for Victoria and MVP, being with Joe and Gail Kim was totally worth it.