Chapter Three

Paroxysm

"It's dark out. We should go back soon."

Her tiny head moves to face the girl beside her, eyes paling against the moon's light as she stares. "But I want to stay out here a little while longer with you. Can't we?"

"They'll be mad. And, well, they'll worry too."

"They will, won't they?"

She sighed. It'd been awhile since they spent time like this together, alone. Here, they weren't a high-class girl and attendant. Here, they were just friends. She liked that, and missed it greatly during the time they spent apart. "Did you…miss me?"

"Of course I did!" The girl's eyes brightened with glee at hearing this, her cheeks warm and heart throbbing madly. "You're…my best friend. And besides, I would never leave you alone. We made a promise, no?"

"Yeah," she smiled and nodded, "…we did."

But at times when such darkness lurked and seeped in the world around them, she wondered just how much longer that promise would hold. How much longer could she remain happy or pretend to be with everything else being so horrible?

The young attendant jumped up to stand and reached out her hand, smiling. "Come on, Kohaku. Let's go home."

Home…yeah, it's right to call it home. It was theirs. And so long as they could be together, no matter the sadness that was within her, she could overcome it. So long as she had her, it seemed possible. And frankly that's all she needed.

Kohaku watched from afar, entranced as the two boys skidded across the training grounds. Seishun, using a normal sword instead of his Household Vessels, talked Seijin through as the small blonde awkwardly stood and held onto a sword of his own. He parried a few strikes before shying away, risking a hit to his exposed chest. The exchange in itself made her smile. Leaning against the wooden threshold, she let her eyes linger on the sight of the two training so early in the morning, just after breakfast.

It reminded her of how she trained with the twins, something she still owed them. And even more, it reminded her of her own days of training, those few that she'd received from Prince Hakuyuu himself. The memory somehow calmed her down but as she let herself relax, she felt the raw burning sensation of fresh welts, this time on her thighs. As expected, she'd been punished for her deliberate defiance but she didn't apologize for it. Instead, she relished in the fact that from all the bad, something good had happened: she found Seijin.

She stayed until the two ended in the afternoon and welcomed them with glee. She thanked Seishun with a nod. The young vassal assured her that he had taken the time to learn her language for the princess's sake, and although he wasn't as proficient as her siblings, he was decent enough in a day to catch the meaningful words.

When he stumbled on one, it started to get a little irritating that she had to repeat herself. To her complete surprise however, Seijin spoke up.

"The General said that she would be sure to compensate you for hard work, Seishun-dono, and that she's thankful to both you and the First Princess."

Kohaku and Seishun stared at the young boy with wide eyes, shocked and amazed. Wanting to proof what they were both surely thinking, she signed.

"You…understand me?"

"I do," he replied after a brief pause.

"How?" she asked.

"I learned from the scroll that Sousei-sama and Suisei-sama lent me." He glanced down at the floor, staring intently at the wood, before mumbling something to himself while his hands mimicked the signs she'd just done with an eerie accuracy. "Yes, I'm positive this is what you meant to say. Was it not?"

"But…" Seishun let his mouth remain open for a second before pursing his lips. "That can't be. We received those scrolls at the same time last night. How did you learn it so well in such a short time?"

At that his eyes widened before he sheepishly stared at his feet, clearly embarrassed. "It's…something weird about me. I'm sor—"

Before he could even apologize, Kohaku grabbed his shoulder to get his attention. "Don't be. It's not weird; we're just amazed. Could you explain how you did it without any help and in such short time?"

Seijin lifted his gaze and his mossy green met stark blue. "It's just—I have good memory."

"How good?" Seishun asked, curious.

Seijin pursed his lips for a second before answering. "It kind of just works by itself. I can…remember anything I read or see." His hand reached up to his head and scratched at it, nervous, as his eyes shifted to the side. "It's weird, I know."

"It isn't." Kohaku patted his head making him stare up at her again. "It's amazing."

It made her happy to see his lips quirk at the corner, a smile wanting to come to them as he nodded. It bothered her to think that this was probably the first time anybody told him such thing. With such valuable information, she began telling Seijin how it'd be much easier for him to adapt to her needs this way. That was, of course, despite the fact that he needed serious help with training. That the mind remembered was much more different than the body remembering.

Walking over to the rack of weapons, she picked a staff in her left hand before pointing one end at Seijin's hand with which he still held his own sword. "Pick it up, Jin. If you're making such an effort to learn, then I'll take the effort to teach you what's truly hard as a General's vassal."

A grin came to him and Seijin nodded, ignoring the odd nickname she gave him. She ignored the pain on her legs just the same and walked him through several maneuvers using Seishun as their living training dummy. Kohaku found it hard to learn herself but she found early on that teaching others came rather naturally. It was one of the reasons why she personally trained Sousei and Suisei with their Household Vessels and, she supposed, why so many of her soldiers always wanted to spar against her.

As the morning turned to early afternoon, she found herself exhausted and her pain all but forgotten as her body came alive with the light exercise. "Good job, Jin. You did well."

"Thank you, Miss General," he said, while taking all their weapons and putting them back in their place.

Kohaku thanked Seishun and dismissed him before turning back to Seijin as he came back to her. "Kohaku is fine. I mean, I'm already calling you something like Jin, anyways. Besides, honorifics aren't my thing."

Seijin pursed his lips before giving her a half grin. "Then, Miss Kohaku is fine, I presume? It would be rather inappropriate for a servant to call you so informally, after all. At least that's what Seishun-dono told me before."

"I suppose so. But mark my words, you'll get used to it. Few tend to call me by my title. Even my own soldiers tend not to." Sort of. Then again, the replacement they used—Lady Reizei—wasn't that much different. "But don't think I'm pushing you. You do what you find comfortable for you, Jin."

He chuckled before saluting and taking a bow. "As you wish, Miss Kohaku."

She smiled. He was peculiar and she liked that. He was different and she liked that, too. He stood out in much the same way she did and that gave her some kind of comfort in the solace she usually found herself in. And that made her more certain of her decision to take him in.

Days passed and she arranged her schedule accordingly to better suit the changes in her life at the palace. No new orders had been given to any of the Generals present, her or Hakuei included, so she stuck to the notion that her days would remain free for the time being and worked from there. And surprising her further was the fact that, despite being in such hectic schedule, things didn't seem to slow down.

She wasn't bored.

And time passes fast when one isn't faced with such monotony.

"Miss…?"

No… She swatted at a hand poking her.

"Miss Kohaku…?"

Let me sleep. She swatted harder at the hand that touched her shoulder.

"Miss Kohaku, it's Lady Masami. She's coming this way."

Instantly, Kohaku snapped her eyes open, jumped from her chair, and started scanning the place. But, thank goodness, the library was empty.

Wait a minute.

Library…?

She heaved a sigh, letting her tense shoulders relax. Peeved at what he'd done to wake her, she glared back at Seijin, the blonde flinching at the unnerving sight.

"S-Sorry, but you told me to wake you if you fell asleep, Miss Kohaku."

"Did I now?"

"Yes," Seijin assured her with a smile. "You said you wanted to study but that you weren't sure how much you could remain awake, so you instructed me to do this. And I quote 'don't let me sleep even if I hit you'." He grimaced and rubbed at his jaw, "Which, by the way, you did a few minutes ago."

Oops.

She apologized about that and chuckled. Situating herself against her chair, she picked the scroll that had fallen when she fell asleep before continuing to study the tactics in it. During interims where she couldn't understand some jargon or strategy, she would sign at Seijin to find a reference to it. They had been at this since after breakfast and it was already late in the afternoon. Wanting some rest, she asked him to bring them both some treats to pass a few minutes with. As they enjoyed their tea and pastries, Kohaku mulled over how far the kid had gotten. What her mind lingered most was how fast time had gone by. She let the aroma of the chamomile tea sink into her along with the fact that a month had already gone by without consequence.

It baffled her how much her and the rest of her family adjusted to life in the palace. Sure, they'd been here before but it certainly was different now that they were older. But the world was so easily prone to change as were they as humans living in it. And after eleven years surely things were bound to change.

Seijin had been a nice addition to her little clan, for one. The boy had learned much from Seishun and, although it took some time, he adjusted to the twins and their antiques. And of course, the amazing skill of his helped him greatly in his studies and in her own.

"It's nothing special, really," is what he said when she complimented him.

But it was. And Kohaku sought the fruit that such valuable mind had and did his schedule accordingly. The mornings he spent with Seishun doing physical training while the afternoons were spent with her studying battle tactics and strategies. To her surprise, it only took him a couple of days to fully learn her language which made it far easier to communicate with him.

Speaking of talking, after the serious talk that she had had with the first prince, Kohaku had made it her priority to learn all she possibly could. Learning such things had always been something she kept in mind in order to one day find her haven from Masami. Now it was something that had to be done. Not only because she was told to but because she never wanted what happened at Hakucho to happen again.

The short month they'd spent in the palace so far had also been good for Sousei and Suisei. Since the day she began to teach them, Kouha and Kougyoku wanted to continue their lessons, but because of how hectic her schedule was now with all her studies, it left her less time to practice with them. So instead she suggested an alternative. The twins could easily help them with it; after all, they had offered since the very beginning. Through the days the four of them would spend time learning from one another; at times all four together, at others in pairs when only one was available. Sousei usually took Kougyoku but Kouha interchangeably got either. It made her happy to see them get along so well after so many years apart. Many a time did it remind her of the peace they had before the fire, before everything changed.

And for them, this change of pace was most likely appreciated. They were just children—although, she supposed that they would always be in her eyes—and they had gone through far too much war and violence to last them a lifetime. They needed a rest and it seemed that spending time with the prince and princess helped them acclimate.

As for Masami, she remained rather quiet to her surprise. After the night of the meeting, there had been no subsequent beatings, at least no severe ones. Because Kohaku had done nothing but stay true to her word of working hard, Masami had no excuse to beat her around. Of course, she hardly needed one when she would simply use her own anger as an excuse to do it. Those she didn't understand but she didn't mind as much as the others. Regardless of reason, she didn't dare fight back. After all, she knew the consequences if she ever took action. But thankfully the days passed on without trouble.

And ever since the meeting she hadn't seen either of the two eldest princes. Perhaps in passing during the morning she would catch sight of Koumei but other than that the two were elusive to her sight. Not that she was eager to meet them again.

Perhaps what Kouen asked at the end of that meeting still bothered her. It was true that she'd never acted so rashly before but the fact that Sousei had been injured had changed everything. At that moment, there wasn't any right or wrong thing to do; at that moment only two things mattered, Sousei and killing those who'd done him harm. In retrospect, it hadn't been the smartest choice but she didn't regret it. But after days of replaying the fight in her head, she couldn't help but be bothered by their enemies, and more to the point those that she knew had managed to escape her attack that day.

But then the logical part of her brain, the one that was starting to thrive with so much knowledge, told her that it'd be better to let those things be for the time being. There would be no use in worrying over such issues when they didn't have any right answer. Deciding to turn in for the night, she instructed Seijin to help her put the scrolls away as the evening became darker outside.

"Miss Kohaku?"

Kohaku turned with a yawn as she rubbed her stiff neck. "Yes, Jin."

"Was your routine this hectic before coming to the palace?"

"Hardly."

She smiled at remembering the days from a couple of years ago before being sent out into battle. The days before her father fell ill and when she still held no significant stance in her family, something she rather enjoyed. Despite already having captured both Beleth and Marbas, their father didn't deem her fit for commanding an army. The fact that she was a woman was the least of his objections. The most prominent one was that she was too soft. He'd seen her pacifist way of dealing with problems and how she seldom resorted to violence to achieve her goals. Kohaku didn't understand what he despised more: that she refused to use methods that had worked for him and the emperor, or the fact that her unorthodox approach actually worked most of the times. It hadn't been until after his sickness, and a hellish test, that he approved of her taking his place as General of the Southern Subjugation Army.

And that didn't compare to the hell that entailed living under Masami's dogmatic thumb. Thinking back on it now, she would much rather take their father's bigotry over his own daughter's grisly torture.

But Seijin needn't know about that. Nobody needed to know.

"It's late, Seijin," she pointed out as they headed to her room. She brought the thick robe over her frame as she felt a chill down her spine. Fall was already midway and the chilly temperatures were hitting during early mornings and late nights. "You should go rest. You've got another day ahead of you tomorrow."

"I suppose I do," he replies with a mumble. "Will I be learning anything new?"

"I've told you before, it all depends on how far you come tomorrow." It's a question he asked often since she started training him much like the twins would. "Maybe it'd be better for Sou, Sui, or Seishun to train with you before I go any further."

"You mean because of their Household Vessels?" he asked, his interest piqued. With a nod as an answer, he glanced down at his hands. "Is it hard to be a Household Vessel?"

"Ask them. I wouldn't know."

"Then is it hard being a Metal Vessel user?"

Kohaku stopped briefly at the doors of her room before shrugging her shoulders nonchalantly. "It's something I chose. Can't really complain even if it were."

"Almost makes it sound like it does," he mumbled before covering his mouth and saying a small explicit under his breath. "I was out of line, my apologies."

She shook her head and waved her hand dismissively before patting his head. "Don't be. Your truthfulness is quite refreshing. But let us part ways here, it's getting late. Goodnight, Seijin."

He smiled before bowing. "I bid you goodnight, my lady." With that he left to the servants' quarters where he was being housed and Kohaku entered her room ready to turn in for the night. Despite the training in the morning, her muscles had tense considerably not being used to such leisure after two years of battles. The training was too mild to be any good and she doubted that training with the twins would be any different.

None of them really fought her the way it should be. They held back, pulled their punches, and she hated being treated like that. Seijin was new so she understood where he came from; he was just learning and his hesitations were something to be expected. Suisei was rough but because her style was more playful and taunting, she was easily predictable. Sousei could fight against her well if he put himself to it but he seldom did. His efforts were spent elsewhere, such as providing support rather than damage.

And the fact that with her acute hearing she had a very distinct cheat, it made it hard for anyone actually trying to fall on par with her abilities.

But such thoughts quickly fled her mind when she noticed something beyond the paper screen that separated her parlor and bedroom. Pushing the screen aside, she watched as Masami sat on her bed, back against the headrest, and her prying eyes reading through the pages of her journal.

Rage took over without her realizing and she strode over snatching the bound book with force. Masami glared up at her, appearing slightly peeved, but made no move to retaliate. Instead she stood up and walked to the other side of the room. "Studying hard, I presume."

Kohaku didn't affirm nor deny her statement. Something was odd about Masami. Anyone with an ounce of intelligence could see that. What she wanted to know was what caused her to be like that.

Masami toyed with something that she hid beneath the sleeve of her hanfu before turning to Kohaku with a frown. "Have you spoken to father about your current state of affairs?"

"Why would I?" Kohaku scoffed at the question that came from nowhere. How much free time did she think she had, really? Ignoring the annoyance that somewhat sprung from Masami, she sat at her bed and started undoing her clothes to change. "He's recovering, and the fact that I'm studying won't help him."

"Is that so?" she asked, incredulity clear in her voice. "Then would you care to explain this?" Kohaku caught the movement by the corner of her eyes and stared at the parchment that now laid open on her bed after being haphazardly thrown there. Her eyes quickly scanned what was written.

It was word from their mother about their father's state. He was getting better apparently, slowly but surely. She sighed in relief at reading that but the relief quickly ended when she read the last part. It was a direct order from their father: he had decided that even after his betterment that Kohaku would join him on future battles as his second-in-command.

That can't be.

Her emotions hit her like a storm. They ranged from an odd sense of joy to skyrocketing uneasiness. Even the joy was mixed in with some doubt. Because of their father's narrow-mindedness, she had never expected for him to accept her as anything else than one of his daughters. He barely recognized that she had been powerful enough to conquer two dungeons—that being with the evidence right in front of him—which was why she doubted she would ever reach anything other than being an interim general while he recovered. But now, be it from his own recognition or resignation to the facts, he wanted her to permanently remain as part of his army. He wanted her to be part of what their country took most pride in—their military prowess.

That, in itself, made her unimaginably happy but at the same time it rose her anxiety levels through the roof. And it wasn't because she wasn't sure of her father's reasons, those were by far the least of her worries. What did worry her—or more like who—stood right behind her, frighteningly silent.

"Congratulations, little lamb."

Kohaku's whole body tensed up at the coldness that struck her at hearing those words. They hadn't been loud, barely a whisper, but they frightened her nonetheless. Turning her body fully, she froze at finally seeing what Masami had been hiding.

No.

The silver carnation hairpin from her journal, the one she had failed to notice missing, was now in the most destructive hands she knew of. Masami held the dainty object in her hands, her fingers holding each end separately and bending the metal as far as she could. A taut smirk played at her lips as she tightened her hold a little too much before releasing the tension on the hairpin; the glint in her eyes became ever so brighter each time when she saw Kohaku gasp and her eyes widening in horror.

"Father must really see potential from what you've accomplished in such a short time." Kohaku's eyes never wandered off from the pin as Masami spoke and walked towards her. "And of course that you're learning here in the palace under the First Prince's orders would capture anyone's attention." She spoke slowly, methodically, and enunciated her words with every step until she stood a few feet before Kohaku.

She watched, her eyes wide, knowing her precious possession was but arm's length away and yet afraid that if she even breathed at her the wrong way, Masami would destroy it. So instead she stood still.

Masami held the hairpin between her index finger and thumb before dangling the thing precariously feet above the ground. It wouldn't break and some part of her brain knew that but she couldn't keep her fear from raising as it slowly slid from between her fingers.

"Too bad you're rejecting the position." Her eyes widened when the hairpin slipped out of Masami's grasp but was caught fast enough before it fell. "Isn't that right, lamb?"

Kohaku only nodded.

"Good girl." A sweet smile came to Masami's face as she tossed it her way without any warning. Scrambling to react, Kohaku caught the hairpin and held it close to her bosom, relived beyond words that she had it back safe. Her fears gone, she turned up to glare at Masami who was already half way across the room. "I just wanted to make sure that you and I were on the same page and that the letter wouldn't get you any ideas. You don't belong out in battle or in public. Neither do those djinns nor whatever strength father sees truly belong to you. And you know why that is, don't you?"

Kohaku glared daggers at Masami but knew the answer to that question: nothing belonged to her. Meeting her eyes, Masami smirked before turning towards the door and waving back at her. "Glad we could come to terms, little lamb. Goodnight."

The sound from the door clacking closed pierced her ears. She stood in her empty room still fazed by what happened. Her fingers caressed the silver carnation emblem on the hairpin and the leaves sprouting from each side. Cold as it was, it held a warmth that couldn't be replaced.

She'd been stupid to leave it unattended and unhidden from Masami. She'd grown so used to her routine that she foolishly forgot about not having her journal and the hairpin with her at all hours of the day. It had been normal back at home where Masami had full reign to traverse their residence without consequence. Here, Kohaku had thought her roaming would be minimal in order to not catch attention. But, then again, if she was crazy enough to punish her in the palace then this didn't seem as impossible anymore.

How could I have been so stupid…

Unable to let it be and still feeling the lingering fear of Masami coming into her room, she vowed to find a better place for it. Kohaku understood that no matter where she may place it, Masami would find it. So the best way to hide it would be in a place where she would be unable to reach it—a place where, even if she could, she wouldn't touch it.

Her mind wandered off to every possible place as she drifted in and out of sleep, holding the hairpin close to her chest. As the metal warmed to her body temperature, her mind dwelled on one possible place to hide it—or more like the right person to hand it to.

Damn me and my exaggerated thoughts.

All night, she'd thought of the perfect place, or person in this case, to help her hide the journal and hairpin. She couldn't risk having it put in danger because, as Masami had shown her the night before, she wouldn't hesitate to break it to pieces. She wouldn't allow that. And thankfully, if everything went well, it wouldn't happen. She had thought that having that to look forward to the next day would give her some peace of mind but it had done the complete opposite. She slept mere hours out of anxiety and because of all the unexpended energy she had, the lack of sleep hadn't done anything to her. But her mind was exhausted beyond belief.

And if that wasn't bad enough, she woke before the damn crack of dawn. Not wanting to go back to sleep knowing she wouldn't anyways, she thought a stroll could help her unwind. Of course, the journal and hairpin were snug between the folds of the simple hanfu she wore. Choosing the eastern extremities of the palace, she walked along the outer barracks. Because of the ungodly time only a few people were awake. Mostly servants, they went about quietly preparing themselves and starting their tasks for the day. Rounding the stables, she headed out towards the expand where the largest trainings grounds where.

As she went into the place, she marveled at the grandeur of the place. Half of the training grounds were outdoors, which was where she preferred to train, but most of them were small, enclosed areas. The mere size of this one, though, made even the largest indoor grounds pale in comparison. Easily more than half the size of the eastern palace, it amazed her as she continued to walk through it that it was connected to the forests that bordered the northeast of the country.

This could very well be used for arduous kinds of training. The thought of the twins and their usual routine came to mind; surely, whenever they brought the issue back, she could suggest this place to use. Walking further into the forested area of the grounds, she took a deep breath and enjoyed the sounds of all the nature around her.

The fleeting wings of birds—real or otherwise—calmed her lingering unease. Following a trail, she walked not expecting to meet anyone but the deeper in she walked, the more a certain noise began to reverberate in her eardrums. She stopped beside a tree and leaned against it as she turned her ear towards where she heard the faint sound.

Clank.

Clank.

Clank—clank.

…metal?

It had to be. It was hitting…a tree. The distinct noise made from metal against wood was a bit hard to discern but as she began to walk in its general direction, she recognized it for what it was. A sword striking bark. Skipping her way and avoiding the roots and boulders in her way, she treaded beyond the beaten path and towards the sound. It didn't take long for her to find it and the person who had so forcefully slashed their sword's edge against hard wood.

From behind, all she saw was a broad back clothed by white and black robes. Fiery red hair laid loosely on their back slightly held back. That alone gave away the person's identity although it would have been ridiculous to mistake the man for anybody else but him. Taking different stances, she watched from afar as Kouen slashed, pierced, and stabbed the bark of the tree. The force of each hit made the metal quiver but his firm hold quickly ceased the noise that reached her ears. Each hit bared the tree of its bark as the sharp edge or point marked its place. And with each movement of his body, she could hear the stark sound of his movements.

Her hearing was keen to the point that she could easily hear the muscles in his body as they contracted. She also heard the start of each contraction a second before he moved. And if she really focused—just as she started to do by closing her eyes and letting her hearing sharpen—she could even hear the blood running through his veins, the pumping of his heart as it rushed the blood through, and his controlled breathing as he prepared each stance and subsequent hit.

In its own strange way, it was rather pleasing to listen.

"You would do well to know not to intrude on others. It's uncouth."

The baritone tone rushed into her ears and engulfed her. Akin to an ocean's waves, it consumed her with her honed hearing and sent chills down her spine, she opened her eyes and lifted her head. He had turned her way but was still where she last saw him. From what she heard, though, he could as well have been whispering in her ear from how his voice reverberated.

She couldn't deny being caught, so instead she gave him a sheepish smile and approached him. When she was close enough to be seen, she bowed out of courtesy.

"My apologies. I didn't mean to interrupt."

She cringed forgetting that no one was there to translate for him. To her surprise, though, he looked elsewhere before plunging his sword onto the ground and letting it stand by itself. "You stood there for quite a while, breaking my concentration. Whether you meant to or not doesn't matter now. It's done."

Well, excuse me.

Wringing her hands together, she grinned fearing that if she were to actually answer she would just be digging her grave deeper. Her eyes wandered away from him and found the small pile of weapons that he kept leaning against another nearby tree. They were few: a couple different swords, a polearm, and a wooden staff.

Unable to help herself, she closed the gap between them completely being ignored as Kouen busied himself with cleaning the sheen of sweat that covered him. Bending over, she picked the staff; out of the bunch, it resembled her weapon when equipped with Beleth. Although the weight distribution between a normal staff and Beleth's weapon were quite different, she guessed that the style of fighting used between the two was relatively the same.

"Is that your weapon of choice?"

Caught off guard by the sudden question, Kohaku turned with a raised eyebrow. Kouen began exchanging it between both his hands and testing each, the metal ornament dangling from the hilt as he moved. Choosing his left, he tightened his grip on the hilt before charging.

But she heard it before he moved. Feinting to the left a split second before, she evaded the assault before twirling the staff up to the side to defend against the subsequent slash against her right side. He held steadfast, the sheer strength of his hit making her shake in her feet for a moment. Her eyes narrowed and she straightened her staff to let his momentum pull him down but he was too smart to not notice. He pulled back before she could even raise her leg to knee him once he began falling down.

Kouen stood a few feet away, still in stance, and measuring her up from head to toe. Intently listening, Kohaku took her own stance holding the staff parallel against her left forearm. "Fast on your feet, I see."

She smiled sweetly with a tilt of her head before signing with her right hand. "Cheap shots seldom work with me."

"Is that so?" Kohaku heard it again, his muscles contracting, but this time had a harder time getting her body to react to the quickness of his movements. She clicked her tongue as all she could do was guard against his attacks at the speed he was going.

Goodness, for being such an imposing man he could sure move fast. His strength was something she couldn't begin to contend against, either. Each blow carried a heavy impact and no matter how great she was at predicting his moves, if she kept being on the receiving end of such forceful attacks she would tire before even landing any counterattack.

Okay, change of plans.

Kouen threw blow after blow not leaving her a moment's reprieve. On the last hit, though, instead of defending against it, Kohaku sidestepped before crouching down and thrusting the staff upward from beneath him through the opening she saw. Sadly, she clicked her tongue when he fended the hit away with his other hand and redirected his sword towards her. Backing away in a panic, the edge of the blade nicked at her shoulder as she made some space between them. But if he wasn't letting her rest then neither would she.

I'm not about losing to anyone. Much less you, little prince.

Taking a step back, she let her grip slip from the forefront of the staff and held it near the end. Not wasting a breath, she sprinted around Kouen as he repositioned himself while she dragged the staff along the ground making noise as it hit against the floor. Catching him by the side, she brought her staff down as hard as she could. Kouen was quick enough to block the attack and felt his sword quiver from the hit while hearing the humming of the metal from the impact.

Kohaku grinned as she quickly changed her grip on the staff, holding it properly again, before twirling it against her arm to strike low at his side. He blocked yet again, feeling the quiver and hearing the humming. The smirk didn't leave her lips as she continued with the dance she'd posed against him. Gyrating the staff around and aiming on different spots of his body, she whirled and spun every which way she could in a myriad of attempts to catch him off guard. On every turn and twist, though, he was quick to block not letting her get to him.

Kouen began to think her idiotic for repeating the same attacks when she clearly saw that none where reaching him. But it didn't take him long to realize that something wasn't right. The more he guarded against her attacks, the more noticeable his reaction times got. That wasn't possible; he knew his body and had trained it enough to know exactly how fast he could react. But as he continued to parry her attacks, and because there was no way she got faster so suddenly, he couldn't ignore that he was, in fact, getting slower.

As the humming of metal against wood continued to buzz in his ears, he understood. He had to stay away. Leaping away from her on the last blow she dealt, he brandished his sword out to stop the metal from quivering and the noise from reaching his ears.

Lifting his gaze to meet hers, she smiled, a taut line on her lips, before she skipped back and stabbed her staff against the ground to propel herself up. It wasn't much but it was enough to allow her to kick at the air, swinging her foot across in a line in front of her. Sensing the slight change in pressure before him, Kouen didn't hesitate in raising his sword and calling for Astaroth. The sword heated in his grip as white flames burst from the hilt enveloping the blade. Bringing the sword down in a clear strike, he sliced through the attack that came straight at him—a sickle-shaped gust of sound that he slashed in half as it reached him—and heard it clash against the trees behind him.

Kohaku watched entranced as the white flames on his sword cut through the wave of sound she had propelled his way. Using a small portion of Beleth's power, she had caused rapid enough vibrations to create the sharp, blade-like gust of sound. But she was amazed he caught on to her so fast and knew to use his djinn's powers to counter her own. But she hadn't expected to catch him off guard so easily, either. He was their Commander General after all; she had to give him some credit.

Brandishing the blade with the flames still licking its edge, Kouen raised an inquisitive brow. She did her best to hold back the laugh that threaten to escape at seeing such expression on his face. And since she hadn't seen any other than his passive and rather contemptuous look, it made it that much harder.

"I wasn't aware we agreed on sparring with djinn."

"I wasn't aware we agreed to spar at all."

"It was an assumption," he replied, glancing down at his sword. "Seeing as you took a weapon, I thought it a good opportunity to test your abilities for myself."

"Other's testimony isn't enough?"

"I find eyewitness testimony unreliable at best," he said and flaunted his sword, this time with his right hand. "But I don't find this terribly inconvenient. If this is how you wish to show your capabilities, then continue."

Kohaku pursed her lips, mulling over what he proposed. Training like this—Metal Vessel user against Metal Vessel user—didn't sound as bad as she thought at first. Sure, their powers clashing could be destructive but luckily they were pretty far out to fight on equal level without causing significant damages. And as hard as it had been at first, she had to admit that this was quite fun. And if she was going to finally have some time to relax and tire herself out then she would, by all means, take him on his offer.

"Then how about this?" Tossing the staff aside, she reached for her feather pen instead as it laid laced in her bun hair, making the eight-pointed star appear on its surface.

If you would, Beleth.

She heard both Beleth and Marbas chuckle at the back of her mind, finding her little bout of energy refreshing. The djinn's deep voice resonated in her head with his answer, "With pleasure, my king."

Holding it in her left hand, a line of golden light sprouted from the feathered pen as it transformed into her djinn weapon equip. A shakujo—sounding staff—manifested itself in the pen's place; made of gold with small rubies encrusted on the rings, the staff was of solid black wood with a gold end. Holding it parallel against the length of her whole left arm, the rings ended above her head as their chiming rang through the air.

"Would it be much to ask for a fair battle then? Weapon equip against weapon equip. Your flames against my sound."

He didn't answer but instead let the flames consume the blade almost as if charring it with its intense heat. The rather normal, albeit elegant blade morphed into a much larger, longer, and exorbitant sword. Edged in black and coated in some gold and silver, an intricate design ran from the hilt were a symbol lay and traveled along the blade with the eight-pointed star most prominent.

"Very well."

Not missing a beat, she had to force herself to tumble away from Kouen's sudden strike. He'd sprinted to close the gap between them and she had heard it but had to force her body to listen to her brain. Before she could turn around and stand, she heard his muscles contract again and knew he was coming towards her.

He's not joking around anymore.

Not trusting herself to react fast enough, she brought her staff up to block the swing of his sword. She held her stance as she stood back up, holding his blade in place against the upper end of her shakujo and staring up at him as they stood face to face. The rings on the circlet of the shakujo shook from the force of the clash and she easily controlled the vibrations, lowering the timbre.

His eyes narrowed and he brought the blade of his sword against the circlet effectively stopping the noise from the rings. "I'm not falling for that twice."

Apparently so.

Breaking them from the standstill, she stomped down on the floor giving herself enough propulsion to jump fairly high and away from him. Kouen's momentum broke and the blow from his sword struck the ground; glancing down at the rather deep hole left behind from both hits, his eyes followed the dainty woman that had landed gracefully quite a distance from him. She grinned and waved her staff over her head jokingly making noise with the rings. Not letting him take advantage of the distance between them, though, she began swinging her staff, making more noise, and this time forming it into more blade-like gusts that shot his way.

The change in pressure gave it away for him again. It was more than one this time and they were converging towards him fast. Not having time to avoid them, he struck through them as they came. If Kouen had to describe her fighting style from what he kept seeing, 'annoying' wouldn't begin to hold a candle to it.

Her movements and body control were smooth and precise. Her strength was nothing out of the ordinary, but she compensated well with what other assets she possessed. The fact that she not only could mess with his body and mind with her sound somehow but could also readily, and rather accurately, predict his attacks said as much. But as she continued to bombard him while changing her position, it became clear to him how to end the child's play.

Rushing through the blades and cutting them down as he went, he dashed forward to her. The action made her hesitate for a second. Kohaku could hear the muscles that contracted and it told well where he would strike next: the left side of her body, the most exposed seeing as she was now.

I'll risk it and put up a wall. Even if it goes through, the resulting shockwave of it breaking will draw us both back to how we were before.

It was the safest bet when she didn't know what he planned to do afterwards. The moment she saw him dart towards her, his sword ready for the strike, she positioned herself to procure the sound wall. That was until she felt something rigid against the left side of her hip. At remembering her journal, she froze.

Seeing her hesitation, he took the opportunity to emblazon the blade with the same white flames from before and went for the hit; this would end with his victory. Kohaku locked her jaw, her eyes fleeting quickly between the blade and the short, nonexistent, distance between them. Not taking the risk, she pounded the ground with the heel of her foot to propel herself out of range but the hesitation cost her. Instead of slicing through her side, the blade cut against her thigh with the white flame searing her skin and clothes.

She cringed and grinded her teeth at the pain as she somersaulted away from him. Her focus on the journal and hairpin, she grabbed at her side making sure they were still there and did well to ignore the throbbing burn on her thigh. What she couldn't ignore were the white flames that kept licking at her exposed skin now that the left half of her skirt was being consumed by the small fire.

Not wanting to be left half-naked or for it to reach the book, she took it out of her clothes a moment before knocking the end of her staff down. The molecules that ignited the fire dispersed from around her fast enough to leave the flames with no oxygen to burn around her body, ultimately putting the fire out. Her leg buckled slightly from the pain but she was more worried about the left lower side of her clothes being nonexistent.

Kouen watched from afar as she struggled to draw her clothes down and over her exposed body while holding with the other hand both the staff and journal—an object he hadn't realized she was carrying until she pulled it out from the folds of her hanfu. Realizing their sparring was over seeing as she was otherwise preoccupied, he undid the djinn weapon equip before walking over to the flustering woman.

The broad blade that was flaunted in front her face as she looked down on her scorched thigh shocked her. With cheeks lightly dusted from the shameful display and her eyes glinting with resentfulness, she glared up at Kouen as he placed the cool steel against her thigh.

"Phenex."

Kohaku watched intrigued as the ornament that she'd seen dangling from the hilt of the sword shone and depicted an eight-pointed star. A small, rose-colored bird emerged from the blade and hilt ornament and spread its winds brushing gently against her burned skin. A sensation of coolness and relief rushed through her and she looked, eyes wide, as the scorched skin vanished letting flush skin emerge in its place. Kohaku was amazed and intrigued at the same time; was it healing the wound, or expediting the process itself? Life magic had always been interesting to her but this was more seeing as in a few seconds the burns from the flames completely disappeared.

Finding it easier to stand now with a fully healed leg, she stood straight and glanced up at the prince. She was about to thank him when all she saw was his back as he walked back towards the weapons. A tick at her jaw started at his aloofness as he busied himself with sheathing his blade than with her after having fixed damage he caused.

"You're a fair opponent," he said, packing up everything that he'd brought with him as he knelt down to do so. "Too distracted and fidgety but those are fixable problems."

The tick got bigger. I can't tell if he's complimenting me or simply belittling me in a very subtle way. Her inner struggle over which it was got interrupted when out of blue a handful of clothe got crammed into her already full hands. Startled a bit by the abrupt action, she glanced down at the black cloak in her hands. Glancing over her shoulder, she only saw the broad back of the men who'd just left her without much of anything except some advice—she hoped—and a way to cover her indecent state.

Dispelling Beleth's weapon equip, she placed the journal and feather pen down on the ground before wearing the cloak properly. It was overly huge but it would do until she could get back to her room and change clothes. Picking up her belongings, a stray ray of light hit her eyes making her shut them and turn cautiously to its source. From between the tree canopy she faintly saw as the sun rose above onto the sky.

Dawn had barely broken through when she stumbled upon this place and with Kouen. Had they really sparred hours into the morning? If they had, she hadn't noticed and the thought somewhat gladden her. The things that took her undivided attention like that were few and far between, much fewer the ones that did so for such a long time. Instead of feeling discontent or abashed from the events before, she felt satisfied…as strange as that sounded.

Shaking that out of her head, she strode back to her room hoping that the palace hallways were still empty enough to allow her time to change and let her keep some sense of dignity.

Seijin blinked at the object he held in his hands: a bound journal with a hairpin sticking out from between the pages. He lifted his gaze, mossy green eyes full of bafflement meeting determined blue.

"Safekeeping?"

Kohaku nodded.

Well into the evening, the two were at the study: Kohaku with four open scrolls, cross-referencing information, and Seijin working to bring her any other things she needed. She had talked about a special task that he would do for her, just before they hit the four-hour mark of being there, and handed over her possessions to him.

In her eyes, this would be best place to keep them. Seijin wasn't only a vassal of the Reizei Household, in their terms he was a servant. Harming or threatening those who served under another was prohibited in Kou and even punishable. Masami wouldn't dare touch or interrogate Seijin about her belongings even if she knew he had them with certainty. Although she felt bad to an extent for using him for such thing, she also wanted to keep her things safe. And if she had to use Seijin for something as selfish as this then, well, so be it.

Sorry, Jin. I'll make it up for you one day.

"Will you do this for me then?"

"Of course," he answered with a sigh. "And I know there won't be an answer even if I asked what it was, so I won't bother. But will you want to know where I'll be keeping them?" She nodded and agreed to tell her once he'd decided on a hiding spot.

"And remember, if you open it I'll know."

A chill ran down his spine not just because of the underlying threat in those words but because of the sweet smile that she had while signing that sentence. "I won't. I swear." Their routine went on for another hour and as they were packing up to leave, the doors of the study swept open and two figures ran up to her almost tackling her down.

"Haku-nee!"

Kohaku chuckled as the twins hung from either side of her with huge grins on their faces. Suisei's didn't look much different but Sousei's definitely marked the glee that he had about him. Before she could ask anything from them, they beat her to the punch. "Congratulations!"

She frowned but froze slightly at remembering Masami's little conversation from the night before. Oh, please don't let it be that.

"What for?"

"We heard about mother's letter!" Suisei exclaimed, squeezing her arm from the excitement.

"You're going to be father's second-in-command," Sousei added with a smirk on his face. "That's amazing."

"That's beyond amazing!" Suisei said, jumping up and down. "It's a miracle."

Kohaku couldn't help but chuckle nervously at the happiness they shared for her accomplishments. Even Seijin at hearing the news clapped and congratulated her as well. But as elated as the little pseudo party was she had to cut it short before they got too ahead of themselves.

"I'm not taking the position."

The instant they read her signs, they stepped back and stared dumbfounded. "What…?"

She gave them a wry smile, knowing they wouldn't like this. "I can't take it."

"Why not?" Sui asked.

"It's not mine to take." Knowing it was a cheap shot but that it would work best to convince them, she turned to gaze at Sousei.

Noticing this, he frowned. "No, you're making a mistake if that's your reason."

"It belongs to you, Sou."

"But haven't I told you that I don't want it!" he exclaimed, livid at her blatant stupidity. Suisei stood between the two as a clear line was drawn between Sousei and herself.

She knew how much Sousei hated to be reminded of his future, of how he'll eventually end up chained to responsibilities that he didn't want. He didn't want to lead an army. He didn't want to lead their family. And he had told her his reasons and worries as to why he wouldn't take the position even if it were offered or shoved down his throat.

He'd rather follow than lead because, as she learned from him, his biggest fear was making decisions he would later regret.

Taking a deep breath, Sousei frowned but she could see him clearly holding back a glare. "Don't do this, Kohaku. I don't want this."

"I can't, Sou. Please…understand that."

Yelling an explicit at the top of his lungs, he stormed out of the study with Suisei crying out for him in worry. She stared back at Kohaku with a perplexed look before running out after her little brother. Feeling torn from having done something like that to him, she sighed. Not wanting to dwell on it and promising to herself that she'd talk it over with him on another time, she and Seijin finished cleaning up after themselves before heading in for the night.

As they walked to her room, Seijin, a few steps, behind spoke up. "May I say something, Miss Kohaku?"

"Sure."

"What you did and said…was it perhaps for their sake?"

Kohaku slowed down as those words struck. How perceptive. Smiling over her shoulder, she reached out and ruffled his hair.

"What makes you say that?"

"Nothing in particular." Seijin reached up to lay a hand on his own head. "Although, maybe it's the fact that you were so calm while telling them your answer. Frankly, I was surprised that you would reject such a good position, too. The fact that you gave such poor reason to answer them with surprised me more but made me understand something too. It's almost as if…" He shook his head unconsciously.

"As if what?"

"…as if you did it on purpose. As if you…knew the reason but rather than say it you opted to keep quiet." His brow furrowed as he said each word slowly as if trying to decipher what his own brain was coming up with. "Almost like…you wanted to protect them from…something." The more he spoke, the more she noticed that she had done a good job at choosing him for her vassal. Perhaps much too good of a job.

But instead of giving it away, she grinned and shook her head. "You're thinking too much into it. Sousei knows I'm right, he's just being stubborn. I'll talk to him later about it and get him to understand."

Seijin nodded but still looked confused. Not wanting to dwell more on the topic, she excused him from his duties early and got to her room by herself. Once inside, she leaned her back against the far wall before sliding down to huddle down into a ball.

She hated upsetting Sousei or Suisei. This one hurt most seeing as it wasn't even her actual decision. If it were, she'd be a little more motivated to make him understand. But it wasn't. And no matter how much she hated either outcome—not being second-in-command and shoving the task onto Sousei whom she knew wanted nothing to do with it—she had to enforce the decision.

If she didn't, Masami would surely…

Don't think about it.

Sleep had eluded her yet again. But her mind, as blank and distant as it was, had wanted a distraction and guided her to the only place where she'd gained that over the past month in that place. But neither sign of Kouen or his weapons came as she reached the secluded area. Still somewhat dark out, she could hear the cries of the crickets as they went about and even heard the rustling of smaller animals as they came and went.

In the hopes of blanking her mind out she went to train but he wasn't there. And not having slept at all the night before added to her unstable state of mind. She wanted a distraction. Something—anything—to keep herself from thinking about the problem she'd caused.

Exhausted in both body and mind, there was no clear leash on her and she just wanted to let go. Every so often it tended to happen. Having no voice took away an option of distress; she couldn't scream or have a tantrum. But destroying things was always a second best; it's what she's good at doing anyway.

Dreadful thoughts surged forward and before she could think it through she spun on her heels and punched whatever laid behind her. Her bare knuckles struck the bark of a lone tree, ripping through her skin's surface. Neglecting the slight stinging, she continued throwing punch after punch with the same result: the bark laid intact while her fists became more and more bruised and bloodied. As she carried on, she began adding kicks and scraping her feet more and more. The pain increased but she kept ignoring it.

She just wanted to destroy it.

But her hazy mind only saw her blood marring the bark that stayed unblemished from harm. That just made her angrier. It was like everything else; no matter how hard she pushed them they would always shove her harder back—where she didn't want to be.

I don't want to lie to you.

Her ears caught the miniscule cracks that resounded from her right hand and fingers. That last punch must've cracked something.

I don't want to cause you pain.

Kicking it with her left foot, she felt the impact cut deeper, staining her shoes and the hem of her skirts red. She could see pieces of the tree sticking into the wound, deepening it.

But that's all I keep doing.

Damn it. Her ire rose, her strikes getting more forceful with her emotions. Why wouldn't it just fall already?

Marbas!

At her order, dark purple energy coated her hands and feet silhouetting them as claws and talons. Feeling the surge of powers her emotions gave her through Marbas, she turned and with the momentum back kicked the thickest part of the tree's trunk. The claws on her talons slashed the trunk, cutting it across and cleanly through. Panting, Kohaku watched with narrowed eyes as the tree began falling, causing a cacophony to pierce through her ears as animals ran away from the ruckus. Before the trunk touched the floor, she punched a clean hole through forcing her magoi through a single spot and cleaving through it once more, even rupturing the ground beneath it.

The energy on her hands and feet crackled and began surging upward wanting to engulf her in the raw power. It felt good to unleash like this with such unhindered power. It's why she loved using Marbas when she fell to her lows.

Beleth was a destructive djinn in its own kind but it was controlled, precise strength that required thought.

Marbas was a completely different kind of cataclysm; it was unfettered, feral, and simple, pure power.

She couldn't destroy the things or people that held her back. Reason kept her from doing that. But she could ruin other things and she used its powers to surrender her sanity for power. Marbas took away her control and freed her.

But the feeling was short-lived and it left her with something worse than anger: emptiness. The energy receded from her arms and feet until it disappeared onto the tips of her fingers and the soles of her feet. It was only then that she could hear Marbas and Beleth talking, soothing her mind. Exhaustion caught up to her and her legs buckled underneath her as she fell to a sit.

As her mind returned to her, she began feeling the pain of her wounds. As sanity came back, she began to think about the things that mattered.

Sousei was angry. Even after calming herself somewhat and going to see him before going to bed the night before, Suisei had been the one to come out and tell her that he didn't want to talk. Kohaku hadn't pressed on.

Suisei was understandably struggling to choose a side; she held family beliefs higher than anything but choosing one over the other clashed with the beliefs she was taught and those she was born with. Kohaku knew that Sui couldn't choose to be completely on her side even when she knew it was the right one, solely because she didn't want Sousei, her brother—her twin—to be sad.

And Masami simply watched everything from the sidelines. Kohaku hadn't thought about it since she was pretty preoccupied with seeing after Sousei and her own ravaging emotions, but she had found it odd that the twins had found out about their mother's letter. Being the youngest, there was no point in giving them the message to relay. No, if anything their parents would've addressed the letter to Masami, first and foremost. And yet they found out that same night.

…she must have told them.

Feeling rather idiotic for not having seen through that earlier, she slumped down and laid against the ground, dirt, and leaves.

Of course Masami would do something like that. Despite how much she hated it, Kohaku admitted that they were playing two very different games. She always played her pieces as they presented themselves to her, always being moved by events and people that stood directly in front of her. Masami held plan after plan, assuring that each push put pressure onto the next.

The threat of using her journal and hairpin had put her on the edge. Having her forfeit the position and admit this to the twins—to Sou— had been to throw her over it.

And it worked.

Don't let it.

She couldn't. Taking a deep breath, she thought it through. By doing this idiotic tantrum of hers she'd fallen into Masami's hands. Sulking about this wouldn't make anything better; Sousei was still angry, Suisei was still stuck, and she was digging her pity hole deeper.

Don't let it.

Repeating that over for a few seconds, Kohaku took another deep breath, remembering words that always calmed her down. "Don't let anger control you. Because if you let it, it can hold a leash on you. Much like fear can."

Don't let it.

A last breath got her to sit up and gaze up at the hole she made in the canopy. The faint light of dawn was beginning to hit over the sky, changing the dark blue into an array of red, orange, and purples. Catching a faint sound as she gazed into the sky, Kohaku turned to see Kouen as he stood some feet away.

His eyes wandered over her, surely to the disaster she caused, but didn't question anything. Instead he glanced down at her patiently, or stoically, depending on how she perceived him to be.

"Should I presume you to be leaving?"

It was clear by his blasé tone that he couldn't care less about what she did but the fact that he asked was oddly gratifying. And strangely enough, she didn't want to leave. Shaking her head, she sat there not wanting to get up yet. But before she had a moment to rest from her fit, a blade plunged right beside her into the ground. It scraped along some granite, making a screeching noise that hurt her ears and made her wince before lifting her gaze towards him.

"If you stay, I'll put you to use then."

He walked off, leaving her for a moment as he went off to lay down the rest of the arsenal he'd brought with him. Grabbing the hilt of the sword, she hoisted herself up but stopped briefly when she felt a soothing sensation on her hands and feet. A glint of rosy light caught her eye but it came so fast that she thought she imagined it. Besides her wounds where still there, they might not hurt as bad as before but she still had them.

Lifting the sword out of the ground, she brandished it awkwardly. Blades weren't really her thing. But as he brandished his own and told her what he wanted for a warm-up before they actually started sparring, she found it rather refreshing.

It was different. Her anger gone, dispelled somehow, she focused more on bettering herself. And as she trained alongside him—memories of olden days flashing vaguely at times—she mulled over what to do now. There were issues to be resolved and she needed to think about them to solve them.

Surely, though, she could do it. She would find a way. All she needed to do was think it through.

A/N:

Well, here it is! Another chapter c: I wanted to get this one out before I left for vacations. Ten days of no writing when I want to do so much is gonna be frustrating but I'll deal. Things might be somewhat confusing right now—some events or characters, in particular—but don't worry, I'm going somewhere with it. Just hang on tight and enjoy the ride as it goes.

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Again thank you all so much for being here when this little bud is barely sprouting. The chapters are long but not consistent so bear with me for a time. Know that I have everything planned out though. This story has a solid begin, middle, and end completely outlined just waiting to be written and read by your guys. That's my ultimate goal: get this out for you guys to enjoy c:

Since I won't be seeing you until probably the new year, I'll be wishing you all a Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, and a Happy New Year! Hope to see you all in 2017 again! So for now, hoped you enjoyed my last upload of 2016 and stay tuned for the first update of 2017.