Author's note: And here's the thrilling conclusion. I couldn't find a suitable place (aka nail biting cliffhanger) to divide it into two, so this chapter is loooonnng. It probably rambles a bit but a lot of things needed to be said.
Thank you once again for all your reviews and encouragement. I keep saying this, and it keeps being true, you guys are great!
CHAPTER THREE
Walter quietly closed the door behind him as he entered the garage. Even though he'd come to terms with the fact he would be alone the rest of his life, it still hurt. He knew now he'd never be truly happy with anyone else. That the pain of being alone was actually preferable to being with someone he'd never love.
He'd thought he'd found the answer in Florence. He might have been content with her, or someone like her. . . Someone logical and like-minded. Someone who would have been content with him and his quirks . . If he had never met Paige. . .
But he had met her. And he loved her. He loved everything about her. Her smile. Her touch. The way she said his name. The way she always smelled like. . .
He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Then another. Lavender tickled his nose, as strong and alluring as if she were standing next to him. How was that possible? She hadn't stepped foot in the garage for over six months. The light floral perfume had lingered for a couple of weeks, growing fainter until one day he poignantly realized it was gone.
Following the scent trail, he walked over to the staircase. As he climbed upward, he could hear Ferret Bueller chittering, then heard a human voice. Someone was in his loft.
As stealthily as he could, he reached the top of the stairs and entered his living quarters. He was only a few steps inside when he had to stifle a gasp as a voice he instantly recognized spoke again.
"Did you miss me, little fella?"
Peering around the corner, he saw Paige holding up the ferret, looking at his furry face. "I missed you," she continued, pulling him to her chest. Bueller squirmed his way inside her blouse, resting between her breasts and yawning smugly. Walter had never been so envious of an animal in his life.
"I miss him too. I miss him so much." What sounded like a sob escape her throat. "I should have never left him."
He couldn't believe what he was hearing. Wondering if he'd been in a car wreck or perhaps had fallen down the stairs again and had hallucinated the whole evening, he emerged from the shadows where he'd been lurking.
"Then why did you?"
"Walter." Jumping to her feet, she extracted the squirming ferret from her shirt. The sound of his name on her lips twisted his stomach into knots and the pterodactyls lodged inside didn't like it.
"How did you get in here?" he asked, not as harshly as he should have. "I changed the entry code."
She chuckled nervously. "You should have changed it to something other than Ralph's birthday. It was the first combination I tried."
He ran a hand through his hair. "Yeah, probably." Aiming his gaze at his feet, he asked, "So why did you? Leave me, I mean."
"I saw you two tonight," she said instead of answering his question and he could hear the bitterness in her voice. "At the restaurant. . ."
He'd deliberately chosen a place they'd never frequented together, which must mean she'd done the same with. . .with one of the men she was dating.
"Not that I should have to explain myself to you," he said defensively. "It was the first time. . ."
He watched as her face paled. "Did you. . .did you sleep with her?"
"No." He lowered his gaze. "Not that it's any of your business. Have you slept with any of the men you've been dating?"
"What?" Her outburst spooked the ferret, who hopped out of her hands and scurried away . "I haven't been dating anyone. Who told you that?"
He drew in a sharp breath. The grapevine had been wrong. She hadn't been dating other men. A heavy weight lifted from his chest. "Doesn't matter," he said as he shook his head. "I, uh. . ."
"I've been taking potential clients out to dinner." Her expression grew pensive. "Oh, God. . . That must be why they think. . ." She sat back down on his couch, dropping her head into her hands. "Oh, God," she said again, her voice muffled. "On top of everything else, I'm an idiot."
"No, you're not." He watched as she straightened, swiping uselessly at her cheeks.
"Is that why you. . .why you went out with her?" she asked.
"One of the reasons," he conceded. "It was an attempt to see if Fl, er, if she and I would be compatible."
"And were you?"
"No. She, uh, she threw up after I kissed her." He stared back down at the floor, bracing himself for the sound of her mocking laughter.
But it never arrived. Glancing back up, he saw her confusion. "She threw up? Was she sick?"
"No. Apparently I disgusted her. I was not as repulsed to the point she was, but. . . Repulsed nonetheless."
Paige bit her lip, something which never failed to stir him. "I don't what to say. 'I'm sorry' seems . . .wrong. Especially since I'm not." Her mouth quirked for a second. "Kinda makes me a bitch, doesn't it?"
"No, you're not a. . .that." She was driving him crazy. Sitting on his couch. Looking so damn beautiful. It was as if the last six months had never happened. He wanted her so much. Too much.
And he didn't even know why she was there. Jealousy over seeing him and Florence together? She'd obviously hadn't come to gloat to his face about being with other men. So why. . .
"So why are you here?" he asked, putting his thoughts into words.
"Ralph misses you. The others miss you too. . .even though they'd never admit it." She picked at the sofa cushion. "And I miss you."
"I thought I exhausted you. That I was immature and boring. . ." He turned his head away as his vision began to blur. "That I didn't. . .I d-didn't satisfy you. . ."
"I'm so sorry," she said. "I was lashing out because I was hurt and my pride was hurt and. . . I was jealous and insecure and. . ." Pausing to catch her breath, she added, "I'm so sorry for all those awful things I said. None of them were true and. . ."
"They were true enough," he cut in. "True enough to hurt me. As you intended. Because I'd hurt you. Which I had been trying to avoid."
She hung her head, staring down at her hands resting on the top of her thighs. "I know that now." Clearing her throat, she continued, "I was always the one pushing for open and honest communication between us. Then I go and do something stupid, like telling you to lie to me to spare my feelings. If I'd been honest about not wanting to go to the lecture in the first place. . . None of this would have happened."
"I overheard you telling Ralph you didn't want to go," he said. "I heard you say you'd rather be back in the swamp with the alligators than attend it with me." Remembering those words, how they'd wounded him as surely as any weapon. . . All the emotions he thought he'd gotten over came bubbling back to the surface. The pain. . . The anger. . . The dread. . .
Wincing, she lifted her eyes to meet his. "You heard that?" Walter nodded, not trusting himself to speak. "Oh, God, you weren't supposed to. . . Oh, God, is that why. . .? Oh, God. . ." She slumped against the back of the sofa. "This was totally my fault, wasn't it?"
He opened his mouth to protest, but she shook her head. "No, you still should have told me you took her. . .Florence instead. I probably wouldn't have been happy about it but. . . But those are my insecure jealousy issues to deal with, not yours. . ."
"I tried to follow your rules," he replied. "And you're right, I should have told you. I let it go on for far longer than I should have until your feelings were going to be hurt no matter what I did. And I'm sorry for that. But you should have told me you didn't want to go in the first place."
"I know." She blew out a stream of air, ruffling the strands of hair hanging over her face. "I hate the idea that Mark Collins was right. That we're too different. That I'm fruit punch and you're fermented fish and that no matter how hard we try, we'll never be compatible."
"No." Walter took a step toward her. "Collins was wrong. Is wrong. Not about the fact that we're different. Of course we are. I knew from the day I met you, you were different. I recognized I needed you, and your difference, in my life. It's why I offered you a job with Scorpion in the first place."
"I thought you wanted to help me. . .and Ralph. That you wanted to help us. . ."
"I did. I still do." He inched even closer, close enough to smell the sweet earthy scent of her lavender. His body began to stir, trembling at the thought of them. . .together. . intimately. He quickly doused his prurient thoughts. They were a distraction he couldn't afford right now.
"I might as well admit it, my team. . .Centipede. . . Well, I got cocky and now I'm in over my head. I thought I didn't need Homeland. . .or you. . . And I was wrong." She exhaled softly. "The others, Toby, Happy, Sly, they're all miserable. And Ralph. . . Oh, God, he's not the same without you. His grades. . . His attitude. . . I'm so worried about him. . ." She glanced up at him, her eyes damp with unshed tears.
"I've been worried about him too. I've wanted to contact him. But I wasn't sure if. . ." He trailed off, his concern for the young genius making it hard to speak.
"We've made such a huge mess of this, haven't we?"
"Yes." And he didn't know how to fix it. It had to be harder than just apologizing to each other then falling into bed. A prospect he would welcome with open arms. But then they were never physically incompatible. And even he knew there had to be more to a lasting relationship than just intimacy.
"So what do we do about it?" she asked, interrupting his musing. "These past six months. . . I've felt so incomplete. . . Like half of me is missing."
"Me, too," he admitted. He waved his hand at the empty space beside her on the sofa and she nodded. He sat down about a foot away, close enough to be unnerved by her presence, distant enough he could hopefully restrain himself.
"We could try counseling," she suggested. "Maybe Dr Rizzuto could help?"
Walter sighed. "I suppose we could give it a try," he acquiesced. Personally he thought the therapist was a flake. Although the man had helped repair the worst of the rift between him and Toby. And he had helped Happy and Toby with their premarital concerns. But. . .
"I've already received a lot of unsolicited and contradictory advice from people who I thought were my friends. . . My family. 'Tell her how you feel.' 'Don't tell her how you feel.' 'Tell her you lied, but don't hurt her feelings.' 'Don't tell her you lied because you'll hurt her feelings.' 'Go after her if you want her.' 'Back off and let Tim have her. . .'"
" Wait. What?" Paige glanced up sharply at him He could almost feel the sparks of anger shooting off of her. "Who told you to let Tim have me?"
"Who didn't?" he grumbled. "Toby, Cabe, Happy. . . I don't think Sylvester ever voiced an opinion but he probably agreed. Ralph was the only one who thought I shouldn't have given up so easily. I should have listened to him. He is the smartest one of us."
She sat there with her mouth hanging open for a moment or two. "Walter, when did they say that to you? About Tim. . . "
"After Tahoe. They told me I wasn't ready for a relationship with you. That I was only half-baked emotionally. That I should let you be with Tim and if I lost you, I lost you."
"That doesn't make any sense. Why would they tell you that?"
"Because when we were waiting for Homeland to come pick us up after the missile blew up the white building, I said I came to Tahoe to tell you I love you." He hung his head. "And everyone heard over the comms. . . Everyone except you."
"You told me you loved me. . ." Her breath caught in her throat. "You loved. . . You've loved me for that long and. . ."
He shook his head. "No," he said, hastily adding when he saw the confusion on her face. "No, I meant what I said at Happy and Toby's wedding. I fell in love with you shortly after we met, watching you stand through the sunroof of the Ferrari traveling over 200 miles per hour, clutching on to my laptop so the landing software could finish downloading."
She bit her lip. "That's oddly specific." Her voice had a strange quality to it, one he couldn't place.
"You didn't have to help us that day," he pressed on. "You could have told us to go to hell, probably should have told us to go to hell. But you wanted to be able to connect with your son, something in my experience parents had given up trying to do by the time their enabled children had reached Ralph's age.
"When I saw how brave you were, as committed to saving those people as I was, probably even more so. . . I. . .I fell in love."
She was quiet for several minutes and the longer she remained silent, the more anxious he grew. Finally lifting her head, her eyes shimmering, she said softly, "But you kept telling me you didn't believe in love."
"I was a moron. It had never happened to me before. I didn't know what it was. All I knew was I wanted to be around you, talk to you, let you touch me. . ." He took a deep breath as a shiver ran up his spine as he recalled all the moments she'd touched him. . . With her hands and her body and her mouth. . . Tamping down his lust, he pushed the memories aside before continuing.
"And. . . And you talked to me like no other woman ever had before. You didn't put up with my bullshit, told me when I was being an ass. Looked at me like you wanted to connect with me as much as you did Ralph." His hands gripped the couch on either side of his legs. "I knew you were the one. And it scared the hell out of me."
"So you're telling me we could have been together. . ." she murmured. "That I could have actually had a choice?" She pressed her lips together. "I thought you were pushing me into Tim's arms because you didn't want me. If I had known. . . That you did. . . Oh, God. . ."
Walter furrowed his brow. What did she mean? She would have chose him over Tim? As much as he wanted to believe it, he knew it couldn't be true. She hadn't love him back then. Had she?"
"Would you. . ." he asked, deciding he needed to put some of his thoughts into words, "would you have. . .?
"Picked you?" she finished for him. She laughed, but there was no humor in it. "Walter, I already had."
He watched as she lifted her hand and moved it in his direction. Four of her fingertips came to rest gently just above his knee. His muscles twitched underneath her touch as his breathing harshened, his heart beat faster, heat rushed through him like a raging inferno.
"I don't remember the exact moment I knew," she continued, seemingly oblivious to his predicament. "I'd been having confusing dreams, ones where I thought I'd been with Drew. . ."
The thought of her. . .and her ex made his stomach queasy, even if it had just been in a dream. Shivering as if he'd been drenching in cold water, he tried to concentrate on what she was saying.
". . .but instead of him, you came out of the bathroom, sometimes in a bathrobe, sometimes not." Her cheeks glowed pink as he tried to comprehend what she was saying. "Then we had that case, the one where you had to let. . .Sima, Fatima, whatever the hell her name was. . .seduce you. . ."
"She didn't mean anything," he cut in defensively. "I. . ."
"I know." She glided her fingers over his kneecap then back up his thigh. The fire inside him reignited in an instant. "But seeing you kiss another woman. I didn't like it. Not at all. I wanted to scratch her eyes out." Her hand had traveled further up his leg and a groan tried to work its way out of his throat. "I think I'd had feelings for you for quite awhile, but I wasn't sure of them until later that night, when I saw you and Ralph, sitting on the couch while you read the robot spy book to him. . . My heart just melted.
"And you. . .and you still make my heart melt." She shifted slightly so she was looking right into his eyes. "I love you, Walter. I never stopped, despite everything that's happened. And if you. . .if you want. . . I'd like to try to make this experiment work again."
"I've never stopped loving you either," he stated, reaching out and taking her hand in his. "And for the record, this, us, our relationship. . . It was never an experiment to me. I love you and only you. For the rest of my life. And that's a fact."
"Oh, God, Walter." Tears were streaming unchecked down her face.
"And yes, I want to be together again." He ran his free hand over the back of his neck. "I don't know what to do to make that happen."
"I'm not sure either," she said. "Do you want to pick up where we left off? Or start over again? And do you want me back on the team, back with Scorpion? And what should I do with Centipede?"
"I'd like to pick up where we left off, minus the. . ."
"The clusterfuck at the end?" She smiled at him and he was dazzled for a moment.
"Yes, minus that." He sighed wearily. "If you want to keep Centipede. . . It's up to you. I-I, uh, I hired new people. . .and then there's. . ." Taking a deep breath, he extricated his hand from hers. "There's Florence."
She bit her lip to stifle a sob. "Her work as a chemist has proven invaluable on many occasions," he rambled on. "And she and I will only ever be friends." Walter paused for a moment, carefully choosing his next words. "And in the spirit of open and honest communication, I'd like to retain her services. Although after. . .after tonight, she may not want to stay."
"In the spirit of open and honest communication, I have to say I'm less than thrilled you still want to work with her." Paige reached for his hand, massaging his knuckles as she spoke. "In fact, I don't like it at all."
"I didn't think you would," he replied, little spirals of electricity winding their way from his fingers to his heart to regions of his body which didn't need much more stimulation. "But. . . But if you want me to fire her. . . I-I w-will. . ."
Her hand stilled. "You shouldn't have to," she said. "I should learn to deal with my issues and not take them out on innocent people. And I like her, despite everything. . ." She waved her hand dismissively. "I think she needs us, needs Scorpion." With a heavy sigh, she continued, "If she wants to stay. . . I can learn to deal with it. It just may take me some time before I trust her. . .alone with you."
"Uh, of course," he said, surprised and a little apprehensive she'd agreed. "Do you think the others. . .Happy, Toby, Sly. . . Do you think they want to come back?"
"I think they do," she said with a nod. "I. . . Well, I don't think they like my total democracy anymore than they liked your total dictatorship. And I have to admit, voting on every little decision is a pain in the ass."
Over the next half hour, they hammered out the details of putting together the broken pieces of both their relationship and the team. "I think this will work," Paige said. "We merge the teams into one, if the others agree, let go your two new employees. . ."
"Mack's a good engineer, he'll find another job. But I still feel bad about Quincy. . ." Walter stated.
"He caused most of his own problems," Paige pointed out. "And you know we can't keep both him and Toby. It would be a. . ."
"Disaster." He smiled warily at her.
"And we get couples counseling," she stated. "To learn to live with our differences."
"Yes." Their plan sounded good, in theory. All they had to do was put it into practice. But until then, he wasn't sure what to do. It was late, she had to be exhausted. She probably was paying a babysitter to watch Ralph and needed to go home.
But he wanted to show her how much he loved her. How much he'd missed her the past six months. But he didn't want her to think he only wanted her for the sex.
She'd grown quiet, darting little glances his way as they sat side by side on the sofa. Wondering if she was as confused as he was, he kept his gaze on their interlocked hands. Reveling in the softness and strength of her fingers, reliving how they'd felt touching him, loving him. . . He squirmed restlessly. He had to ask, take the risk. The worst thing that could happen would be if she said no.
"Uh, do you. . ." they both said at the same time. She chuckled as he bit out a laugh. "You go first," she said.
He shook his head. "No, you. . ." he insisted.
"Oh, well. . . I, uh. . .Ralph is staying with. . ." She placed her hand on her throat. "Oh, no."
"What?"
"My necklace. . . It's gone." Heat flooded Walter's skin as she looked down her blouse, getting a glimpse of the tops of her breasts and her lacy bra. "Oh." Her mouth dropped open.
"What?" He was beginning to sound like a simpleton. Unclasping her hand, he scooted over, wedging his fingers between the couch cushions on the off chance her jewelry had fallen in the crack.
His futile search was disrupted by a very un-Paige like squeak. Looking up, he watched as Ferret Bueller wiggled across the coffee table, doing his weasel war dance. Something gold and glittery dangled from one of his front paws.
Walter and Paige turned to stare at each other then back at the ferret. "My necklace," she said at the same time he said, "Your necklace."
"That little thief," she muttered, patting her hand on her cleavage as the image of the little critter nestling there filled Walter's mind.
They hopped up off the sofa simultaneously, each of them lunging at the triumphant ferret. He skittered away, chittering happily as he ducked under furniture and ran across tables and shelves as they chased him around the loft.
The slippery little fellow dashed into the bedroom, climbing up into the middle of Walter's bed. Twisting and turning in a celebratory fashion, he suddenly stopped and laid on his back, tangling the necklace in his paws in a taunting manner.
Walter glanced over at Paige who was biting her lip. In frustration or to keep from laughing, he wasn't sure. He snuck a peek at the animal wallowing on his pillows then back at the woman beside him. He held up three fingers and she nodded. As soon as he lowered his hand, he began the silent countdown.
On three, he pounced on the bed at the exact moment Paige did. They both landed on the mattress with an "Oomph," causing the ferret to pop into the air. With a mocking squeak, the critter scampered off so swiftly he was nothing but a brown blur.
Walter laid stunned for a moment, disappointed he hadn't retrieved the necklace. Then he became acutely aware he was lying next to Paige, their hips and shoulders touching as they were stretched across his bed. He could tell by the way her body tensed, she'd come to the same realization.
Turning onto his side to face her as she did the same, he gravitated toward her, as if he were a helpless piece of steel caught up in her magnetic pull.
"Walter." She breathed his name, and the sound of it on her lips made any thought of resisting useless.
His hand trembled as he placed it on her hip. It slid almost of its own accord to rest on the small of her back. Hers was shaking just as badly as she first cupped his face before slipping her fingers into the hair at the back of his neck. His lips mashed onto hers or maybe hers mashed onto his. Her tongue pushed into his mouth or perhaps his pushed into hers. He moaned or maybe she did. Maybe they both did.
Clothing began to be tugged and pulled, unbuttoned and unzipped. She rolled onto her back and he came to rest on top of her. She spread her legs and he eased himself between them. It felt familiar yet new. Comfortable yet unnerving. Overwhelming happiness bubbled up inside him, only to blanketed with a sense of sorrow for the time they'd been apart.
He whispered her name, gazing into her shimmering hazel eyes. She bit her lip as she nodded. "I love you," she murmured.
"I love you too," he replied as he slowly moved inside her.
ooooo
Light streamed through the east-facing windows as Walter opened his eyes. With a stifled groan, he sat up, swinging his legs over the edge of the mattress before standing. Grabbing a pair of sweatpants from a dresser drawer, he put them on before making his way across the loft.
In the farthest corner of the room, he found the little nest Ferret Bueller had made for himself using cardboard box and one of Walter's old sweatshirts. The ferret was curled up into a tight ball next to his pile of pilfered loot. Among the spoons, paper clips, transistors and for some reason, his voltmeter, Walter spied Paige's necklace. As carefully as he could, he extracted it from the other detritus, mumbling a curse when it snagged on a pair of calipers.
He freed it and it tangled around his fingers. With a jolt, he saw it was the one he'd given her at Christmas. A gold chain with three small hearts dangling from the tiny links. Fighting back a wave of emotions, he went back to the bedroom. Paige was awake, sitting up against the pillows with the sheet pulled up to cover her bare breasts. Her sad expression brightened as he approached and a grin graced his own face.
"I found it," he said as he held the necklace up so she could see. Sitting down next to her, he dropped it into her outstretched hand.
"Thanks." Paige poked at the piece of jewelry with her finger. "Oh," she said glumly, "the clasp must have broke."
"May I take a look?" Nodding, she gave it back to him. He examined the clasp, discovering it wasn't broken, just stuck in the open position. Giving it a couple of jiggles, it finally loosened so he could close it. He opened it back up and scooted closer to Paige, placing the chain around her neck. She twisted around, lifting her hair as he looped the clasp through the eyelet and slid it closed.
"I fixed it."
"You sure did."
Paige placed her hands on either side of his head, letting the sheet drop as she kissed him.
ooooo
FIN
(for realsies this time)