Dedicated: To anyone who has experienced anything traumatic in their life, you are not alone. No matter what it was or if other's believe it to be traumatic or not, to you it was. There are people out there who care about you, let them in, let them help you. I DID.
A special thank you to Twilightrocksyoursocks for listening to my idea's and encouraging me to write this story. To Phoenyx-Fyre-Writer for listening to me and being an amazing beta. Your friendships are such a wonderful part of my life.
Thank you to everyone who has Favorite/Follow and/or reviewed this story. You make me want to write more. Please keep it coming and let me know what you think.
A.N. Unfortunately my beta has been busy with school and not had a chance to review this chapter, but I did not want to have my wonderful readers waiting. Thank you for your understanding.
P.M.'s and Reviews always welcome, please no flaming. If you do not like it please do not read it.
Warning: Chapter's 4 & 5 will explain what happened to Angela. While I do not go into graphic detail, I think I detailed enough to paint the picture of what happened to her. It may be hard for some people to read.
C. POV.
Angela heads towards her room to use her bathroom while I go to get Rosalie and we head to the exam room.
"Rosalie you did a great job in here." I praise her.
"Thank you Dad, I wasn't sure what size speculum you want to use so I got the small and medium adult out."
"That's fine, I think I'll probably use the small one, but I will see once I get started. Also I need you to stay close to Angela the whole time, as you may have heard she had several meltdowns. I am not sure how she will react, what he did to her; let's just say she was a very lucky young lady."
"Was he the one who?"
"Yes Rosebud he was."
"I'm not ashamed to say I'm glad he got what he deserved." She tells me, and then looks a little nervous as to my reaction. They know I don't like them speaking of others like that.
"I have to agree Kitten; at least I know your brothers will not go after him." I say before changing the subject knowing Angela should be coming in a minute.
(A soft knock)
"Come in Angel Bug," I call out.
As she enters the room Rosalie and I both exchange glances, we can see she is still visibly nervous.
"Angela…Angela…Angel Bug," I say to get her attention. "I need to make sure you are okay before we continue. I only need you to tell me yes or no, okay?"
"Okay"
"Are you sure you are comfortable with me doing the rest of your exam?"
"Yes"
"Okay, just remember if at any time you need me to stop say our code word which is?"
"Féileacáin"
"I promise I will."
"Good so first I am going to explain what we are going to do. If you have any questions or concerns stop me."
Angel nods her head in agreement.
"First of all Rosalie will be staying in the room the whole time, this will include while you are changing. Normally this is not part of our practice; however, we both agree you may need the support. Though I always will have a female nurse in the room with me during an exam." Again she nods in agreement. I gently place my hands on both sides of her face before I tell her, "Angel Bug I will take it you agree unless you stop me. Once you're ready I will have Rosalie crack the door open, but I will always knock first before coming in. I want to start with the basic physical on you; I already have your height and weight."
Angela raises her hand to indicate she wants to say or ask something.
"Yes Angela Bug."
"Why? What is involved in that Daddy Carlisle?"
"In what?
"The basic physical. Didn't Rosalie do it before?"
"Well excellent questions," I remark which causes her to smile. "Yes and no, I will be checking your eyes, ears, nose and throat, then your glands in your neck and your reflexes. I will also be listening to your heart and lungs, checking your pulse ox, which is the lever of oxygen in your blood or how much oxygen you are taking in and your blood pressure. Now I don't want you to worry or get upset if it's higher, what happened earlier will affect it. We can and will monitor it over the weekend. Finally before we start your actual female exam I will check your spine for any curvatures or bulges. So far do you have any questions?" I ask after explaining the first half.
"How much are you doing?"
"What do you mean?"
She looks towards Rosalie then back to me before continuing. "Is Rosalie going to do any?"
"I wasn't planning on it because you seemed adamant that I was to do it, why?"
"When I said I would refuse if you didn't I meant the female exam, not the whole physical." Angela explains. But before I could say anything Rosalie speaks up.
"Sis, look at me please." She turns toward Rosalie, "I agree with Dad he needs to do everything. I'm right here the whole time, but knowing what you told me I think it's important for him to do it all. Honey we want to help you and you do have the code word just use it. I promise I won't leave you and won't let anyone hurt you."
"Okay, I just want you to know I would be okay with you doing part of it." Angela tells Rosalie just before she gives her a hug. I just smile as I watch this.
"Angela let me finish explaining so we can get started. I'm sure your new Mom, Brothers, and Sister want to spend time with you also."
"Okay"
"So once I finish the first part of your exam I will be checking breasts and armpits for any lump and explain to you the proper way to do a self-breast exam. These are very important to do because if you find something changes, we can check you sooner. Breast cancer is one of the most curable cancers in both men and women."
"Men?"
"Yes Angela, men while they do not develop the same as women do have breast tissue and therefore can and do get breast cancer, so it is just as important for men to check for lumps not just in their testicles but breasts also. After I will move to your abdominal region, this allows me to be able to check your liver and spleen. Finally I'll have you move down where we will do your pelvic exam. As you can see I have two sizes of speculums, I plan on using the smaller ones unless I find they are too small, but I will let you know if I need to switch. Also I have a technique I use on patients that seems to help and I will try it with you. Then we will be done and I will have everyone come home for some fun time. Do you have any questions?"
"Are you going to…do you have to…?"
No, I think I know what you're asking, I may have to check your uterus but I will tell you before and again remember our code word. Any other questions?"
"No not yet, but if I have one later?"
"You ask any questions at any point and time, I'll be happy to stop and answer them or even talk to you if you need. Now there is a robe and a paper drape on the table. You can leave your slipper socks on. I'm going to give you some time and privacy, Rosalie please remember to crack the door open."
"Okay Dad."
I turn and kiss Angela on her forehead before I kiss Rosalie on hers and then walk out closing the door.
10 minutes later
I gave the girls a few minutes longer after I hear the door open. I then head back and knock on the door.
"Can I come in ladies?"
"Yes Daddy Carlisle," I hear Angela answer.
"Okay are you ready to start?" I ask.
"I think so," she answers. I look at Rosalie who gives me a nod in agreement.
'Okay why don't you have a seat on the exam table, Dr. Rosalie will you please take down notes for me?"
"Sure Dr. Cullen," she replies smiling.
"Let's begin," I say as I grab the blood pressure cuff and my stethoscope. "Blood pressure 130/85, slightly higher than I would like but not as high as I thought it might be. I would want to check it in a little while and like I said earlier I will watch you over the weekend. Now let's check your pulse," I say to her as I place two fingers on her wrist, "68, well that's good. Normal is between 50-70 beats per minute. I am glad to see it coming down from earlier." While I am telling her this I grab my portable pulse oximeter and thermometer. I place the pulse ox on her finger and the thermometer under her tongue; while these are registering I watch her respirations. "Pulse ox 99% room air, fantastic Angela, respirations 25 slightly high, but not too bad, why don't you try and do a few deep breaths with me. In slowly and out slowly and in slowly and out slowly. Okay I think I'll recheck your respirations in a little while. They are not bad just slightly elevated yet. Temperature 100.3F, 37.9C."
"Excuse me Dr. Cullen, could she possible be having a reaction to the vaccine she received earlier?"
"Very good observation Dr. Rosalie, yes it could be. We will have to watch her closely and give her some Tylenol for the temperature. Angela how are you feeling?"
"My arm is a little sore, but I've had that before. Am I okay Daddy Car…I mean Dr. Carlisle?"
"Yes Angel Bug, Dr. Rosalie is right though you may be having a mild reaction. This is normal for a lot of people. I'll give you some Tylenol when we are done, also we will just keep an extra eye on you. Don't worry, I know your Daddy Carlisle well and he will not let anything happen to you." I say winking. This earns me her beautiful smile and a couple of giggles.
I put away what I am done with and grab my otoscope and ophthalmoscope to check her ears, eyes and throat; I also grab a tongue depressor. First I check her ears, "ears are clear, no sign of swelling." Next eyes, "pupils dilate and reactive to light." She is able to follow my finger with her eyes while not moving her head. "Very good." Finally I grab the tongue depressor, "okay open your mouth, stick your tongue out," she looks at me and giggles. "What is so funny young lady?" I ask faking seriousness.
"Won't I get in trouble for sticking my tongue out at you?" She says semiserious.
"In any other time I would say probably, but no. Now let's try again, stick your tongue out and say ah." She does as I ask and her throat looks good. "Throat is clear," I say now putting this aside. "Now if my hands are too cold tell me and I will warm them with hot water." I say as I go to check her glands. She shivers slightly so I pull away.
"No Da…I mean Dr. Carlisle. I'm fine it was just a little cold."
"Angela I have no problem warming my hands." I run them under warm water until I think they are warm enough, and then go back to her exam. I feel along her neck, checking her glands. "Glands are normal. Angel Bug you are doing great." I compliment her.
"Thank you, I am really trying."
"We can tell," I say smiling at her. I am truly proud and happy she is doing so well. "Okay why don't you stand up for me please and face your sister?" Again she does as I ask, "I am going to check your spine now, and in each position I will run my thumbs down your spine, but over the robe so don't worry."
"I'm not."
"What I am feeling for are any abnormalities or curves in your spine. So first stand normally," I begin at the base of her neck and go to her tail bone, "good, so far your spine feels fine. Next stand straight up and tall," I repeat the process. Same results, "last can you please bend over?"
As she does both Rosalie and I notice the increase in her heart rate and breathing.
"Okay wait, Rosalie please switch spots with me." Angela starts to protest when I decide it's time for Daddy to come out. "Listen young lady, you are going to find out that as fair as I am none of my children, this now includes you, argue with me. Your heart rate and breathing are showing me signs of anxiety, so unless you want me to stop and make, yes I said make you see Dr. Catherine you will stop acting like this and let Rosalie do the final check. I don't often ask but I will, what is your choice?"
"Rosalie," she whispers softly and looking down.
"Good choice," I say pulling her into my arms. "Angel Bug you are doing so amazingly well, I just want you to be comfortable okay?"
"Okay, I'm sorry I…"
I stop her, "shh, you're okay. I'm sorry I had to pull out the Dad tone, but I will not put up with my children acting like that, you are a beautiful young lady and there is never a problem asking for help or to have someone else check you. Now let's finish this part, please bend over and touch your toes. Dr. Rosalie please check and give me your opinion."
"I fell no curvature or malformations Dr. Cullen."
"Very good, I also have not seen any. Alright Angel Bug you can stand up and sit back on the table please. We are almost done. Only a few minutes more."
"Dad I think I should get her something to drink," Rosalie says.
"Why don't you wait here with her and I will grab her some juice." I say.
I want to give her a few minutes alone with her sister to talk and make sure she is calm enough to continue. I go down and get her some orange juice. When I return I hear my daughters talking, Rosalie making sure to keep Angela calm and telling her how well she is doing. Angela is telling her she knows I'm not him and she knows I will not hurt her like he did. Again I knock and ask permission before entering the room and giving her the juice.
"When you're ready lay down and we will continue," I tell her.
As she drinks the juice she asks, "Um, Dr. Carlisle?"
"Yes honey."
"How should I do a self-exam?"
"Very good question, it's actually very easy. First you will stand in front of mirror with your top and bra off, placing your hands on your sides. You will look at the size, shape and color of all parts of your breasts to see if there are any noticeable changes."
"Like what?"
"Well if they are dimpling, puckering or bulging. If your nipples have changed in size or color, if any parts of your breasts are red, swollen or sore and if that area is sore. Last check to see if there is any fluid leaking out of any part of them. Then you will lay down taking the pads of your fingers make quarter size circular motions on the opposite breast covering your whole breast. Repeat on the other breast, I also believe it's a good idea to do it standing up. Making sure to include the underneath area of the breasts. If you ever notice anything you can tell me, Dr. Catherine, Rosalie or Edward. We will be happy to check to make sure it's nothing major wrong. Most of the time they are blocked milk ducts."
"Is that all I have to do?"
"Yes, why?"
"I thought it would be harder than that."
"No not at all, plus like I mentioned breast cancer is one of the most curable of all cancers in both men and women."
Now Angela lays down indicating she is ready, we notice a slight increase in her heart rate again so I decide to keep talking to her to see if it helps.
"Okay we will go at your speed, I am only going to uncover one side at a time and Rosalie is right here."
"I know I really do trust you."
"Thank you Angel Bug, that means a lot to me," I say smiling at her.
As I begin she takes several breaths with Rosalie and asks.
"If it's that easy why don't men do it?"
"I don't know sis, do you Dr. Cullen."
"Well ladies, men do not realize they actually have breasts and can develop breast cancer. Actually one in every one thousand cases is male breast cancer. While it's a lot lower than women, women have a higher survival rate."
"Why?"
"Because most men either do not believe they can get it or are too embarrassed to tell their Dr.'s there is something wrong."
"I think if men knew the truth they wouldn't feel like that." Angela states.
"I agree honey, and we are all done." I inform her.
"Really?"
"Yes, no lumps, everything appears fine to me."
"Excuse me Dad."
"Yes Kitten," I answer moving to Angela's abdominal region.
"Angela makes a great point. What if we added male breast exams to the physicals we do, we can start with the ones we do on the reservation. Maybe Angela and I can put together some information on male breast cancer. That is if you want to help Angela?" Rosalie asks.
"Ladies I think that sounds like a wonderful, Rosalie since you will be starting to help me at the clinic why don't we have you put together a program we can test on the pack. We can then expand it to the elders and rest of the tribe. Angela would you want to see if your Dad would be interested in a program for his church members?" I ask.
"Oh yes I'm sure he will, especially after I tell him what I learned."
"Then I can also talk to Dr. Snow about something at the hospital. By the way Angel Bug I'm done with your abdomen exam."
"WOW! I didn't realize you were doing it."
"That was the idea, only one part left, and we are done. You are doing great." I praise her knowing she needs it now.
"Thank you," Angela replies with a slight blush.
"Okay, let's finish up why don't we, you have several siblings waiting to come home and play with you. Like I said earlier, I want you to scoot down until your rear end is at the end of the table. I'm going to re-wash my hands while you do. I know you didn't mention an allergy to Latex, however I changed all the gloves I use to Latex Free."
As I am washing my hands and getting ready I hear my girls talking and laughing. They really have bonded like sisters. While all my daughters and nieces, including my honorary ones, are very close they now all have found a 'sister/friend' that they can share a special bond with. That one person they can talk to about personal issues.
Before I turn around I ask the girls if they are ready. Angel tells me she was so I turn around slowly to make sure. I see her just as I asked so I decide to talk to her first then finish her exam.
"Okay Angel Bug, again I want you to know how proud I am of you. You are doing exceptionally well. Now I want you to answer a question and don't worry how you answer I will finish your exam, I just need to know."
"Okay Dr. Carlisle."
"Are you feeling like you are going to flashback?"
"I thought I would have, but no I promise I don't. I…" she looks at Rose who nods her head, so she continues. "I am a little nervous, but I know you are not him, you will not hurt me." She tells me.
I take her hand and look right at her when I say, "Thank you for telling me. I know what we need to do now will be the hardest part, but I also know you can do this." I turn towards Rosalie, still holding Angela's hand and say, "Dr. Rosalie I would like to also tell you what a wonderful job you're doing. Please let me know if you notice anything."
"Certainly Dr. Cullen."
Turning back I continue, "As you know I will be doing your pelvic exam, and then I will most likely do a digital exam of your uterus. Angel Bug please do me a favor and don't fight…"
"I promise I won't Daddy Carlisle," she states fast and excitedly, "I have been trying I promise."
"Shh…Angel Bug, I was going to say don't fight your feelings, even if it means a flashback."
"But…"
"No Angela, your sister's right here and I'm just over there. Also I'm going to do something I do when I have to examine victims of assault. Rosalie can you please set up the examination mirror for me and grab the hand mirror out of the drawer?"
"Yes Dr. Cullen." Rosalie answers before she does it; she then brings me the hand held mirror.
"So at any point you need to just point this towards my mirror, before we begin I'm going to have you and Rosalie check it to make sure you can see what I'm doing. Okay?"
"Okay, but I promise I don't need this. I'm okay I promise."
Before I can say anything Rosalie speaks up, "Sis you don't have to use it if you don't need to. But Mom and I thought it would help when Daddy had to check victims of assault to be able to watch what was going on. You know we were both hurt and when Daddy started doing more E.R. time, seeing more victims of assault we suggest he try it."
"And it has helped a lot Kitten." I interject into the conversation which causes Rosalie to smile.
"Okay as long as you won't get upset or mad at me if I have any issues."
"I promise no one will ever get mad or make fun of you. All of us have past issues that can cause anxiety in us. We are a family and we will help each other when we need it. This now includes you Angel Bug."
"That's right sis, if anyone thinks about making fun of you I'll…"
"Come and tell me isn't that right Rosalie Lillian Cullen?" I say in a stern tone.
"Ah, yes Daddy. I'll come and tell you." She responds.
"Good just don't forget it," I say leaving no room for argument. "Now why don't we finish up so I can call your Mom and siblings to come back home." I say in a much calmer voice, as I get ready to sit down at the end of the table. As I do I adjust the mirror and have both Angela and Rosalie verify the position with the hand held mirror. Once they make sure Angela can see what I am doing I begin.
"Okay Angela please place your feet in the stir-ups and we will be done in a few minutes."
Even though I hear her heart rate increase slightly, she is doing what I request so I decide to wait as long as she needs. I know how hard this is and will be praising her for doing so well. I make sure she is ready before I continue.
"I am going to start with these," I say as I show her the smallest speculum. "These are the small adult size. You will probably feel a little pressure when I open them, but it should not hurt." As I am saying this her heart rate begins racing and she begins to breathe faster and harder. I look at Rosalie and shake my head to indicate that I want to finish talking. "I want you to follow Dr. Rosalie in a few deep breaths, then Dr. Rosalie when I indicate please count to twenty and Angela please keep taking deep breathes in and out slowly. Can you try doing this for me?"
"Ya…Ya…Yes I think so Da…Da…Dr. Carlisle," she replies nervously.
"Angela I promise this will be over quickly, you are doing amazing." I get a slight smile from her when I say this. I proceed to look at Rosalie and give her a nod. She places Angela's hand on her chest and starts to breathe with her sister. After about four cleansing breaths, I nod again to Rosalie to indicate I was beginning. I slowly insert and open the speculum enough to get a sample. Rosalie is at fourteen as I am starting to close the speculum and seventeen when I am removing it.
"All done Angel Bug, you did so well. I am so proud of you."
"What?"
"I said you did very well."
"You're done Dr. Carlisle?"
"Yes Angela, I just need to do the last part and you will be completely done." I tell her as I am marking her specimen jar before I re-wash my hands. I see them watch so I decide to explain why it seems like I am washing so much. "To answer that look, I usually have my assistant closer to me and they mark and close the specimen container for me, and also move the equipment when I am finished. But as I felt Rosalie was needed closer to you, I am doing my own, not that I ever mind. I feel the assistant should be utilized where they are needed the most. That is the reason you have seen me wash my hands so much. How are you doing?"
"I feel better than I thought I would, I am a little nervous still but I'm okay I guess."
"I am happy to hear that and that you are being honest with me." I praise her again.
"Why hide it, you'll know anyways and if I want to heal I need to be honest."
"Very well stated sis," Rosalie says to her.
"I agree Angel Bug."
Once I am done and have new gloves on I go back to the end of the table. I touch her knee on top of the drape and say "alright my beautiful girls let's get this finished. As you know this is the final part. It should only take me one finger to feel what I need to." I say as I show her my index finger, "and I will press gently on your abdomen at the same time. This helps me feel for any endometrial growth on the outside of your uterus. I'm sorry this will be the most uncomfortable part, but I will be as quick and gentle as possible."
As I am talking, I notice she is beginning to breathe heavier again, but I know she is still nervous. I decide to start the exam as I know Rosalie will let me know if something is going on. As I am doing the exam I hear Rosalie clearing her throat softly.
"Ahem"
I don't want to stop as I am almost done when she does it louder this time.
"AHEM!"
Just as I look over at my daughters, my newest daughter is staring blankly and begins to panic, crying out "Daidí."
"Almost done Angel Bug, I promise." I say.
"Daidí, Daidí," she says more frantic.
"I'm here Angel Bug, let Daddy wash his hands please."
Just then she becomes hysterical crying out.
"Féileacáin Féileacáin Daidí"
I use my vampire speed to dry my hands and go to her.
"Shh…Shh…Daddy's here."
"Make stop, make stop, owie Daddy make him stop." She is crying out like a young child now.
"He's done, I promise he's done. No one will hurt you."
"Daidí Féileacáin."
"Where Angel Bug, where are the butterflies?"
"Coming, their coming. Owie, hurt, stop, make stop. Daddy, Daddy help." She starts screaming again.
"I'm here Angel Bug, Daddy and Sissy are here. Shh…Daddy has you; Sissy is holding your hand. You're safe, I promise you're safe. It's over now." I say to her as if I am talking to a young child.
As I am telling her this I think it begins to help her as she is calming down a little. I turn toward Rosalie and we speak at vampire speed and tone.
"Dad what happened? She was doing so well."
"I wish I knew Kitten, I wish I knew."
"Is she?"
"Yes I believe so, but his one is mixing past and present together. I am going to try and see if she will let me leave so you can help her get dressed. Then both of you come to the study, I have a feeling she needs you as much as she needs me right now. While you help her I will go to get something to help calm her down if we need it."
"What are you going to use? I'm just curious."
"Its fine Kitten I know you're worried about her. I'm hoping nothing, but if I need to I will use 0.25mg Xanax, but as that is only in pill form I may have to use Valium. If that's the case I plan on only 1mg IM, half of the lowest dose. I just want to calm her so she can talk about what happened."
"Do you have to use anything?"
"I don't know Kitten, I truly hope not, but I would rather be prepared incase."
"I agree Dad. What should I do?"
"Help her get dressed and be here for her. Your newest sister needs all of us and has a long way to go, just be patient with her Kitten. Be her sister and friend, listen when she is ready to talk, that's the best thing you can do."
I leave them along and grab what I need incase. I hear Rosalie talking to Angela like I have never heard her speak to anyone before. The only person I heard her speak similar to was Billy and this tells me just how much Angela means to her. Rose truly means she will protect her human sister from anyone who may harm her. As I continue to listen to her dressing her sister and them coming down the hall I hear something I never thought I would, Rosalie is singing softly to her sister:
Sometimes in our lives
We all have pain, we all have sorrow
But if we are wise
We know that there's always tomorrow.
Lean on me when you're not strong
And I'll be your friend, I'll help you carry on
For it won't be long
'Till I'm gonna need somebody to lean on
Please, swallow your pride
If I have things you need to borrow
For no one can fill those of you needs
That you won't let show
You just call on me, sister, when you need a hand
We all need somebody to lean on
I just might have a problem that you'll understand
We all need somebody to lean on.
I meet them at the door of my study; Rosalie was able to get Angela into sweat pants and a tank top. She is cradling her in her arms so I direct them to the couch. Angela is whimpering and crying along the way. Once we are seated I ask Rose, "Kitten that was so beautiful. What made you decide to sing to your sister?"
Looking down for a second she watched her sister starting to relax a little. Hopefully this is a good sign as I will not have to medicate her more. She then looks up at me and says, "It was because of you Daddy." I must have looked at her confused because she continued to explain. "Remember shortly after you changed me?" I nod yes. "Edward and I got into that fight and I kind of attacked him." Now I raise my eyebrow at her.
"I would not exactly call biting and attempting to rip your brother's head off as kind of attacking him young lady."
Now she looks down again, though this time out of embarrassment. She knows I am right.
"Yes sir, your right. Well after you…ah…punished me and held me close for a while. I went to my room to be alone. I had mix feelings about you then, I hated you for changing me, but somehow loved you for caring enough to spank me like a real father would have done. Then you held me and tried to show me you truly loved me, even if I resisted your compassion and love. I remember after a while you came up to my room and when I wouldn't talk to you at first you pulled me on your lap and began to cradle me, singing softly. I still wanted to hate you at first because of what you did, but when you just kept singing and holding me I realized you truly loved and cared about me. It was then I realized what it meant to be part of a family, a real family. That I now had a Dad who loved me for me and not what I could do for him, I no longer had to fear anything. I knew no matter what mistakes I made I was loved and could be forgiven, even if it came with a sore rear end. Dad, I'm sorry I never told you how much that night really meant to me, how much it still means to have you comfort me when I'm having a really bad day. Thank you Dad."
I am so touched by her words; I lean over and kiss her forehead. "Kitten, you never have to thank your Mother or me for loving you. It's our true pleasure." Just as I'm saying this we hear Angela softly cry, "Daddy."
Rosalie passes her to me so I can cradle her close to me.
"I'm here Angel Bug, Daddy's here. Rosalie's here, you're safe, we promise no one will hurt you."
She looks toward Rosalie who shakes her head in agreement.
"Why Daddy?" She asks still visibly scared.
"Why what?"
"Why?"
"Angela," I start as I gently turn her head to face me. "Can you talk to us; can you please tell us what happened? You did so wonderful; I was at the end when it happened. I'm not mad or upset; I'm just trying to figure out what I did, what happened?"
"Nothing, you did nothing wrong. Not the way you're thinking. I'm…I'm…I'm sorry Daddy, please don't be upset with me, I tried, I truly tired. I'm sorry." My poor daughter is not crying against me.
"Shh…Shh…No one is mad or upset with you. In fact I am very proud of you."
"We are sis, we are proud of you. I don't think I could have done what you did."
Unfortunately this causes her to start crying harder.
"Angela look at me please."
We can see she is trying to so I wait for her to turn towards me.
"Angel Bug no one is upset with you. Please calm down before I have to sedate you. I would prefer if you told us what happened. Can you please try?"
"Hurts, breathing hurts, scared." She says gasping now.
'Rosalie can you please go get her something to drink." I say before turning my attention back to Angela. "Angel Bug do you think you can swallow a pill for me or not? I can give you a shot if you prefer."
"No Daddy, no please no shot." She says in near hysterics.
"Okay, but if you can't swallow or get more upset I may have to." I tell her.
Just then Rosalie walks in with some ice tea for her. Angela takes a few sips and then places her hand against my chest. I take a few slow deep breaths that she now copies. Once she is calmer she says, "I want to tell you before I take it please."
I nod in agreement.
"When he first walked in he told me how pretty I was, that he knew I would grow into a beautiful young lady. But it was a shame my breasts were so small. That he guesses someone wouldn't care as long as I was will to put out for them."
Rosalie and I look at each other, who would talk to a child like that. We don't say anything, we just let her continue.
"When he as checking my breasts he suggested I think about implants in the future."
She is becoming more and more upset with each statement. I stop her for a minute for two reasons. First to have her take the medication and second to calm herself down before she continues getting more upset.
"Before you continue I want you to take this."
"What is it?"
"Xanax, it's 0.5mg, it will calm you down and could make you sleepy so please don't fight it." I tell her. She is able to take the pill, after we let her take her time before continuing. Once she does we find out what triggered her attack. Unfortunately it was what I did, when I called them beautiful girls and touched her knee. She explains how he touched her in many inappropriate ways. I have a hard time not letting my inner beast out. As I look towards Rosalie I see how upset she is, I know this brought up memories for her too. I put my arm out and she leans closer to me, I put my arm around her shoulders pulling her closer to me. I am surprised that Rosalie didn't react more; she just took her sister's hand before saying.
"Angela I can promise you he can never hurt you or anyone again."
She looks at me and I tell her, "she's right, I won't go into details but he can never hurt anyone again."
I'm not sure if it's my words or the knowledge they are true because she lets go of all her built up feelings.
"Shh…Daddy Carlisle has you," as I'm saying this I hear a soft whimper on my side. I turned to find my Kitten also now crying. I pull her even closer and start humming to both of my daughters. Soft and low to give them both what they need now, comfort and love of their Father. While I am still humming I hear a very low soft voice asking;
"How? Why? It's no fair, why her Daddy, why Angela?"
"Why any of you Kitten, you certainly didn't deserve what happened. Neither did you Mother or Sister Alice. But for whatever reason it happened. I'm just grateful I was there to help all of you, I am grateful we are all here to help Angela now."
"Me too Dad." As she is lying back against me. We continue to just sit quietly, the only sound an occasional gasp or whimper for what seems like hours. In reality only about fifteen to twenty minutes when Angela opens her eyes and looks at me.
"Daddy Carlisle"
"Yes my Angel Bug"
"Do you think it's okay if I tell them? Do you think Seth will still want to be with me?"
"Tell who what? Yes, I know he will. He will be upset that someone hurt you, but will want to not only be here to help you, but will love you with everything he has. He knows what happened to his Mother and Sister; he is always here for them and will always be here for you."
"Tell the family what happened to me? Do you think it will help me heal?"
"Angela, my beautiful, beautiful Angel Bug, I think you should tell whomever you want and as much as you want. As for helping you to heal, your parents did the right thing when it happened, they got you help then, and now your Momma Esme and I will continue helping you. We will get you anything we can to continue helping you. I will explain to everyone that you want to talk to them about something that happened to you and remind them to respect how much you want to tell them, how much you can tell them at one time. Okay?"
"Okay, thank you Daddy Carlisle, but what about Seth, Jacob and Leah? I already told Bella, she has just respected my privacy."
"Sis trust me, they will be there for you, just like we all will be. We're a family, one very large, extremely mixed up, loving, even when we want to kill one another, but no one else can, family. Trust me we would all risk sitting for eternity to protect one another. This includes you and has since you came into our life, since you befriended Bella and Jasper the way you did. No one has tried to do what you did with any of us. Daddy is right when he calls you Angel, because you truly are."
"Rosalie that was so beautifully stated, but let try not to go that far please. Remember it's my hand that will have to blister all your behinds for eternity." I say winking at her getting her to smile. Why don't you help you sister with a bubble bath while I call your Mom and have them head back? Angela when you're done I would like you to let me know please, I want to give you some Tylenol and have you rest a little while. I think tonight we should just finish watching "Our You Being Served Again" and play a game or two. If you want to and feel up to it you can talk to them tomorrow about what happened."
"Okay Dad" Rosalie says.
"Okay Daddy Carlisle, Daddy Carlisle?"
"Yes Angel Bug."
"Thank you," she says as he hugs me.
"Oh Angel Bug, I am just happy I am here to help you, I am even happier that you are now part of our family. But I am going to tell you right here and now, next year when it's time for your next exam, you can choose either Rosalie or Catherine to do it." She looks at me scared again before I can finish. "I will be next to you, I will be your support system next time, but yes I will be there too."
"Okay Daddy Carlisle, I think I can agree knowing you will still be there for me."
To say I am surprised she is agreeable is a true understatement, though I do not let her know. I pull my two daughters in for a hug, kissing them both on their heads and say "I promise I will always be here for you and all my children. Right Rosalie?"
"Right Daddy," she says before I let them go and they head towards Angela's room.
Once I know they are in her room I call Esme.
"Hello Love"
"Hello Dear, how is everything. I was starting to get worried. Alice said she was having flash visions and the boys were ready to come home. But before you say anything, they are behaving and listening. However, Jasper is extremely worried about Angela; Alice couldn't get a good reading, but what she saw scared her."
"I promise everything will be fine, it is definitely better now than earlier. I will explain more when everyone gets home. May I speak with Jasper for a moment though?"
"Of course, I'll get him." She says before I hear her call him...
"Hi Papa"
"Hi Jazz, I hear you are very worried about Angela."
"Yes Sir, but I promise I have been listening to Momma."
"Shh…I know son, I know. As I told your Mother, I will explain more when you all come home and Angela will explain what she wants tomorrow. I just want to re-assure you she will be fine son."
"Will be Papa?"
"Yes son, I will tell you she is physically fine, the rest is her part to tell you. But I will also let you know now and again when everyone is here; she will need our support, all of our love and support."
"She can count on that Papa."
"I know son, I am so proud of you, all of you for caring so much for her. Also for behaving and listening to you Mother."
"Thank you Papa, Momma says we should be home soon."
"You are very welcome my son, now please tell your siblings to behave and I will see you when you get home."
"Okay Papa, love ya."
"Love you to Jasper."
We hang up and I hear the girls talking, I decide to just take the Tylenol and some more tea to her room. I tell Rosalie before going down to wait for everyone to come home.
About thirty minutes after I get downstairs I hear Esme and our vampire children returning home. While they are all coming in I ask them to sit in the living room and call Rosalie down to join us.
"As I told your Mother and brother, Angela had a rough patch earlier, but she is physically fine. While neither Rose nor I will go into any details because that is Angela's to tell. What I will tell you is something very traumatic happened to her in the past and while I am sure I don't have to ask or say this please respect her wishes and be here for her." To which I get a chorus of "yes, of course" and "always." I smile at them being so proud of my family. We all then hear her door open and Angela starting to head towards us; I decide to continue knowing what I am about to say will not harm her. "So tonight I told her we will continue watching "Our You Being Severed Again" and play a game or two."
"Come in Angela" I say inviting her over.
"Angela, darlin come sit by Ali and me," Jasper says.
"Okay, but first I need to ask Mrs. Esme something in private. If that's okay?"
"Of course dear," Esme replies.
Esme gets up and I walk with Angela and her into the kitchen. Even though we know everyone can hear us, it does let them know its private conversation.
"Mrs. Esme I already asked Mr. Carlisle and he said he was fine with it and that you would be to. But I wanted to ask you first." Esme just watches our daughter as I give her hand an encouraging squeeze. "Would you mind if I called you Momma Esme?"
"Oh Angela, my beautiful Angel Girl, I would be honored to have you call me that." Esme starts when she notices Angela smirking and looking at me. "What is so funny?"
"It's just that you and Daddy Carlisle," now it's Esme's turn to smile and look at me as Angela continues, "Both call me Angel. Daddy Carlisle calls me Angel Bug and you called me your Angel Girl."
Esme walks over and embraces our newest daughter in a hug, placing a kiss on the top of her head. "My Angel Girl all of our children have their own nicknames, some Carlisle and I share and use together, others have different ones from both of us. But each one is as unique, individual, and as special as they are to us."
As they are talking I can hear the kids beginning to argue over which game we will play.
"Excuse me ladies, I believe that the natives are getting restless. I think we should go back before someone lands in trouble."
As we get closer we hear Jasper, "Why don't we let our newest sister pick the game?"
"I think that is a wonderful idea son," I say getting their attention. "Angel Bug why don't you go see what interests you. Kitten would you grab the DVD while your Mother gets Angela something to snack on. Then we can just relax and have fun with each other tonight. Angela just let us know when you are ready for dinner."
"Okay Daddy Carlisle," now all of our vampire children are smiling, knowing she is truly part of our family. "Is this game okay?" She asks.
"Apples to Apples, I think that's a perfect game. Alice and Edward all we can do is ask…"
"You don't have to ask, Alice and I already talked and we will try our best to not use our gifts. We just want to have a fun time with our sister." Edward says smiling.
"Thank you"
We spend the rest of our evening and well into the night watching the show, playing and having a wonderful time bonding. By time we are done playing our third game Esme, Angela and Jasper each won one game apiece. I look at the clock as Angela begins to yawn.
"It's one a.m. I think we should all say good night and turn in for some quiet time. Everyone please stay in your rooms until six or seven in the morning, Angela it's bedtime for you. You sleep as long as you need, you had a hard day. Your Momma and I are just down the hall and Rosalie is next door."
We say our good nights and head up to our rooms for the night. I know tomorrow could be a long hard day for our daughter, but she will learn just what our family is made up of, what it truly means to be a Cullen.
I do not own "Lean on Me", though I love the song. When Rosalie sang it to Angela she did change the word "brother" to "sister" as she sees Angela as her newest sister.