A/N: Well, this chapter originally had an idea behind it, but in the time my brother and I argued over it, typed out the name and went on the other chapters, we had forgotten what it was. So, judging by the chapter title (and the ones after it) I give you chapter three. And guess what? It's longish!
FMA has become, officially, one of my unhealthy obsessions. I have a map of Amestris for my desktop picture, one that I went to great lengths to find. That, and I think I know exactly where Amestris is on a modern-day-map. (Hint: The Great Desert is the Gobi Desert). Anyone who wants to know my theories, message me and I'll try to explain my muddled thoughts.
Disclaimers: Arakawa-sensei owns Edward and Envy and all those other guys, and my brother owns most of the story-plot. Not that there's much of a plot to begin with.
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Chapter Three: The Bed
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It was common knowledge that when Envy wanted something, he would go out of his way to get it. If the Sin decided that meat was evil, it was evil and Edward wasn't allowed to eat it anymore. If Envy decided that his bed was uncomfortable, Edward had to share. If he wanted free cable, he stole it.
Having someone like Envy living with you was more than a little tiresome.
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Edward shrugged off his coat and kicked off his boots. He knew just how much Envy hated him doing it, so he did it all the more often. It secretly made Edward happy to see Envy fly off the handle because of something he did. "I'm home," called the blond boy as he sauntered into the living room, where Envy was sitting on the couch.
With his legs using the coffee table as a stool.
Edward was about to politely ask Envy to move his feet - A.K.A., shove them out of the way - when the emerald haired one said, "I broke my bed." He grinned at the stupified look Edward gave him.
"How did you break your bed?"
Envy shrugged and went back to watching his stolen cable. Edward sighed and sat on the floor, pushing Envy's bed problem from his mind, nonchalantly moving the Sin's feet away from him as he pulled open his backpack. He glared at his homework vehemently as Envy put his legs back where he had them.
It was going to be a long evening.
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Edward snapped shut his thick textbook with a satisfied sigh. "What time is it?" asked the boy. When he received no answer, he stretched and stood, glancing at the clock. It read ten minutes past seven. "Ugh, I have to make dinner ..." he muttered.
With another languid stretch, Edward sauntered to the kitchenette and pulled open the fridge. It was literally empty. "Envy! Stop eating all the food!"
Edward waited for a reply, but, again, received none. Angrily, the blond stomped from the small kitchenette to Envy's partly-open door and with a snarl he kicked it open, where, to his surprise, Envy was not. Instead of the palm tree, Edward's eyes came to rest on the shattered bed that stood like an ornament in the center of the room. With his golden eyes wide in disbelief, Edward yanked shut the door and sank to the floor. "How in the world can someone shatter their bed?" muttered the blond, holding his head. It felt like all the energy had been drained from him just to see the bed. Instead of walking, Edward crawled to the couch, where he stretched out and listened to the ticking of the clock.
It was the slam of a door that woke Edward. He sat up with a jerk, scrambling from the couch and looking around the apartment. When his eyes came to rest on the emerald-haired Sin, they narrowed suspiciously.
"Can you gimme a little help?" asked the sin, juggling two large bags stuffed full of what looked like groceries. When the blond only gaped at him, he snapped, "now, shorty! before I drop this stuff!"
Edward glared hatefully. However, the blond complied and relieved the Sin of the two large bags while he was occupied with shrugging off his jacket. An exasperated sigh escaped Edward as he set the bags down on the counters, just in time to have two strong arms wrap around his waist from behind.
"Don't touch me," growled Edward, trying to pry Envy's arms from around his waist. When he felt the Sin's warm breath on his shoulder, he bit his tongue in surprise.
Envy chuckled and released the boy from his grip, moving to put the groceries away. "So, what were you up to while I was out?"
The blond didn't respond, opting instead to glare pointedly at the other. What Envy returned the hostile look with one of genuine curiosity, Edward spat, "How did you manage to so utterly destroy your bed?"
"Ah," said Envy in mock guilt. "You saw that?"
"Of course I did! Because someone ate all our food and then disappeared!" Edward knew he wasn't making perfect sense, but didn't care. Angrily, the blond began to put the groceries where they belonged. He didn't expect the conversation to last. They never did with Envy.
However, to Edward's eternal surprise, the Sin not only began to help unpack the groceries, but he offered an explanation about how his bed became so broken. "I had a nightmare this morning," he explained, "sometime after you'd left for classes." Being helpful for once, Envy crumpled up the plastic bags and stuffed them into the drawer under the sink. "I woke up after I had punched the frame."
Geez, thought Edward as he slammed the fridge door shut, if he does that in his sleep, he must be going easy on me ... Note to self: don't piss that guy off.
With a sigh, the blond pinched the bridge of his nose. "Do you want me to make dinner?" he asked in a level voice.
Envy was clearly surprised. "Even after I broke the bed and ate all the groceries and left you alone and broke the toaster and--" Envy was cut off with a sharp glare. "Only if you want to, Edo-kun."
Another exasperated sigh escaped the boy. "Well, do you or do you not want me to make you dinner?" He was practically shouting by the end of his sentence.
"Well, I guess not. I think I'll just crawl into bed for tonight." Envy looked slightly dejected, even with his grin. "G'night Edward." With that, the Sin turned and ambled toward the couch.
Without really thinking, Edward called, "You can have my bed for tonight." With a soft groan as the Sin cheered loudly, he added, "but only for tonight."
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When the blond was finished drying his single dish, he'd eaten a quick dinner after he'd bid Envy a good night, he wearily dragged his half-asleep carcass to the couch. Where he found no bedding what-so-ever. With a shrug, Edward flopped down on the couch, content to sleep without any pillows or blankets. However, when he awoke two hours later, he was puzzled to find that he was in his own bed and comfortably snuggled up to a very large Envy-shaped pillow.
When he came to realize that the Envy-shaped pillow wasn't a pillow at all, he screamed.
"What in the world are you doing?" asked Envy, sitting up and glaring sleepily at the blond, who had placed himself on the floor.
"H-How did I get here?" asked Edward, gulping in large amounts of air to keep from hyperventilating.
Envy shrugged. "I carried you. It didn't look very comfortable to sleep on the couch, and you were shivering, so I assumed you were cold." The Sin pouted. "Why? Did I do something wrong?"
"Augh," groaned Edward, "just leave me alone." Then, the blond attempted to curl up on the floor, being too tired to crawl anywhere else. Edward, though weary, promptly fell into a fitful and restless sleep.
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As the sun arose the next morning, Edward found himself, yet again, curled up against the emerald-haired one. Instead of freaking out like before, the blond dragged himself from bed and got dressed. After all, he had classes to attend.
All throughout the day, Edward thought about the situation he was in. Envy obviously had, one, no bed, two, issues about sleeping alone in someone else's room, and, three, no job to pay for a new bed. And Edward had no extra money to pay for a new bed.
I don't understand why Envy won't just sleep on the mattresses. It's not like he really uses the bed that much, thought Edward as he sauntered down the streets of Central City. Unless he sleeps all day.
When the boy reached his destination, a high-rise apartment building along the crowded main street, he sighed dejectedly. He was not looking forward to seeing Envy again, but he really had no choice if he wanted to go home.
Edward purposely drew out each and every step he took, opting today to skip the elevator in order to walk up fourteen flights of stairs to reach the seventh floor. When he finally reached his destination, he hesitated before unlocking the door. As he poked his head inside, his ears were greeted with the sound of running water.
Good, thought Edward, he's in the shower. I can at least have a few more minutes of repose from his ... antics.
The blond peeked into Envy's room, not knowing what to expect. what he met with, was a new bed frame, not at all shattered, with his old box spring and mattress off to the side.
Edward was far too amazed for words. So, instead, he sat on the couch and stared out the window.
When the water finally stopped running, Edward turned his head just in time to see the Sin saunter casually out of the bathroom, wearing a towel around his waist with another draped over his head. As he stood in the middle of the room, Edward scoweled. How many times have I told him not to walk around like that? He'll give some poor girl a heart attack one day doing that.
Quickly, Envy towelled his hair dry, then tossed the wet, not-so-fluffy-anymore-towel back into the bathroom. When he spotted Edward, he smiled coyly. "You're staring, Edo-kun. D'you like what you see?"
The scowl on the boy's face suddenly turned into a look of disgust. "You wish," growled the boy.
"Now that you're home, Edward, I have a few things I to tell you."
"You got a new bed frame."
"Yup, that's one. Wanna know the second?" A cruel smirk played upon the Sin's lips.
"You won't be stealing my bed anymore? You won't kidnap me in the middle of the night? You're moving out?"
Envy shook his head. "Nah, not yet. I like sleeping beside you, so," he let his sentence dangle in the air like an invisible knife.
Edward groaned. "Envy, please--"
"Shush, I'm not done!" snapped the Sin angrily. "While you were out, I decided something." The emerald-haired one grinned evilly. "You're going to AA, Edward."