1904
"Is something the matter, Sarah?" Anna Smith asked her at breakfast two days after Miss Adams had been sacked.
She was a sweet little thing, barely eighteen and pretty in a way that gave Sarah a headache. However, she was also intelligent, diligent and respectful all at once, which meant that Sarah couldn't help but have a healthy dose of esteem for her. She was even willing to answer Anna's many questions, just as long as they remained strictly professional.
She had noticed that the younger woman was going out of her way to befriend her, but she was wasting her time; Sarah was determined never to let it happen.
They shared a penchant for witty banter – though Anna's was harmless enough – and an impeccable work ethic, and that was where the similarities between the two of them ended. The young housemaid was the epitome of goodness and wouldn't dream of advancing her career at the expense of another servant. She would despise Sarah if she had even the faintest idea of how far her would-be mentor was ready to go – how far she had already gone – to overcome any obstacle in her way. And with Mrs Hughes making it a point of honour to rescue any lost sheep from Sarah's evil clutches, it was only a matter of time before Anna received a detailed account of her superior's misdeeds – real or perceived.
Anna probably only wanted to milk her for useful tips, anyway. Regardless of her social status, no kind and pretty woman ever looked at Sarah twice unless she needed something from her. Anna was too pretty and too kind, and that made any unnecessary closeness much too dangerous.
"No. Nothing," Sarah answered flatly.
She didn't miss the look Mrs Hughes threw in their general direction. The old bat was openly challenging her to speak up about how unfair it was for her to get robbed of the promotion she deserved. Sarah would have enjoyed nothing more than to give her a piece of her mind right there in front of everyone, but she knew that it would amount to signing her own death warrant...
The housekeeper had been looking at her strangely since she had tried to apply for the position the day before. When Mrs Hughes had told her in plain English that she could go whistle for it, Sarah had been quick to assume that her refusal was motivated by pure personal dislike. In hindsight she rather believed that she had made a costly mistake by rushing things. She had been careful not to leave any clue that would allow the disclosure of Adams' letter to be traced back to her – she had simply seized a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity and hidden the damning piece of evidence in one of the drawers in the lady's maid's room after she had overheard Mrs Hughes tell Mr Carson about the surprise search she intended to carry out in the female aisle. However, she did remain the one servant most likely to benefit from her dismissal, and Mrs Hughes was far from being stupid, Sarah would grant her that.
It was with a heavy heart that she answered Lady Grantham's bell minutes later. This would be the first day when she would be allowed to act as a full-fledged lady's maid, to pick the clothes her lady would be wearing, to style her hair in the latest fashion and make her beauty into a work of art. But now that the moment had come, Sarah could think of nothing but the fact that it would all be taken from her again in a week.
Lady Grantham's impromptu trip to London caught Mrs Hughes fully unawares. She obviously hadn't expected her Ladyship to venture into the capital, where she would be in the limelight, without a proper lady's maid. Sarah could have almost thumbed her nose at her – bringing her on this trip was not only a token of trust from the countess; it also meant that she would get to spend nearly a whole blessed week away from that pesky housekeeper.
Lady Grantham would be staying with his Lordship's sister, Lady Rosamund Painswick, and as was the custom in those cases, Sarah would be temporarily integrated in the Painswicks' household staff. She didn't really mind. While she didn't enjoy most people's company, Sarah still accepted that new acquaintances would occasionally turn into useful connections.
She only saw this little getaway as a chance to take a break from Downton's oppressive atmosphere. She had wondered if she might manage to sweet-talk the countess into granting her a few hours leave and go wander the streets of London on her own. In the end, what Sarah did obtain went far beyond her rather modest expectations.
She had never intended to bypass Hughes' authority in the first place. She hadn't bothered trying since she hadn't thought that she stood any chance of success. It ended up being a reckless, spur-of-the-moment decision, which Sarah only made when Lady Grantham unwittingly provided her with a golden opportunity.
"My, Sarah, you really do have exquisite taste," her Ladyship told her on their last evening in London as she sat at the vanity, admiring herself in the ornate mirror. She was wearing the shimmering pink chiffon frock that she had purchased on Sarah's recommendation at the beginning of their stay and which had been delivered that morning, just in the nick of time.
Sarah allowed herself a small, self-satisfied smirk as she bent down to pick up her lady's discarded tea gown. However, her satisfaction lasted only as long as Lady Grantham's own, fleeting smile. The countess let out a sigh as the tips of her fingers brushed her diamond tiara, a slight frown adorning her lovely face.
"I wonder if that Frenchwoman I read about in The Sketch might be able to replicate that hairstyle..."
The countess gently twirled one of her locks between thumb and forefinger.
"It seems to me that it is never quite the same, depending on the maid who dresses my hair. I do so wish I could keep it styled exactly that way..."
Sarah's grip on her Ladyship's tea gown had gradually tightened as she spoke and it was all she could do not to let her face betray her jealousy. She was having a hard time finding an appropriate answer, blinded as she was by her hatred for her faceless rival, when the real meaning behind her lady's words suddenly dawned upon her – she was not showing faith in the candidate's potential hairdressing talents. Quite the contrary; she was actually afraid that the new lady's maid might prove a disappointment in that regard.
"It doesn't have to end if you don't want it to."
Sarah's voice was as soft and steady as usual, but she could feel her heart thrumming in her chest as she spoke the seemingly trivial words that would set the whole chain of events into motion.
"What do you mean?" Lady Grantham asked, mildly confused, her eyes locking with Sarah's in the mirror.
She took a deep breath, knowing that there would be no going back now. She was going to say it, and come what may.
"I suppose that what I am trying to say, Milady, is that I could keep on doing your hair exactly the way you like it if you would take me on as your lady's maid."
This time, the woman turned around to face her and Sarah instinctively took a step backward, intimidated by her penetrating stare. For a second, she imagined that Lady Grantham was actually able to look past her façade, beyond the courtesies and false modesty, and delve into the depths of her soul, seeing her for who she really was... But she couldn't have, or surely she would have recoiled in shock.
Then, as quickly as it had appeared, the sharp intensity vanished from her eyes, and Sarah could easily recognize the expression on the face of the woman she was used to reading like a book. She was thinking hard, and Sarah couldn't help but hope that she was actually considering her proposal and not merely contemplating how harsh of a punishment Sarah's impudence warranted. The moment seemed to stretch forever as Sarah held her breath and waited for her lady to break the silence.
"Have you already discussed the matter with Mrs Hughes?"
"I have, Milady," Sarah answered and felt her throat clench painfully at the direction the conversation was taking.
"Then you must be well aware of where she stands..."
The wheels in Sarah's head were spinning at full speed. She could guess from her Ladyship's tone and choice of words that the housekeeper had already expressed her reservations. On the surface, this was starting to look more and more like gentle chiding, and yet there was also some genuine questioning in Lady Grantham's voice. Sarah wasn't expected to agree to unconditional surrender and grovel for her forgiveness; she was offered a real chance to stand up for herself. It would be up to her now not to squander it.
"With all due respect, Milady, Mrs Hughes was very prompt to label me as unfit for the job when I have been serving your Ladyship for five years to the best of my ability, and I've never, to the best of my knowledge, given you any cause for complaint."
Lady Grantham's eyebrows rose.
"You do not appear to make much of her authority."
"That seems to be her opinion as well, Milady, which is why I believe she wanted to teach me a lesson by not supporting my application," Sarah said, lowering her eyes in faked embarrassment. "I believe she wanted to show me the true value of humility."
"Any housekeeper expects respect and obedience from her staff. That is the way you are supposed to behave."
Sarah looked back up into the countess's eyes, trying to convey remorse that she absolutely did not feel.
"Of course, Milady. I am sorry. I can see now that I have been arrogant, more than once, and I deeply regret it."
"To be absolutely honest with you, I was the one who raised the possibility of hiring you as my lady's maid... I was quite amazed when all Mrs Hughes had to say about you was that she didn't believe you were ready to bear such a responsibility. I do not share her view, but I think I understand better now why she tried to dissuade me from offering you the position."
Sarah didn't know what to make of the lady's answer, which sounded more like she was thinking aloud rather than reacting to her confession. The countess had just admitted to having been at the very least tempted to take her on, but had Sarah's calculated attempt at honesty actually ruined everything? She didn't even dare ask for clarifications, lest she inadvertently dug her own grave.
"And yet..." her Ladyship resumed. "I remain convinced that you are just the woman I have been looking for. Ladies' maids answer directly to their employer, not to the housekeeper, and you never failed to show me the respect you owe me. I can tell from experience that your skills are more than satisfactory, and I already know that we will get along splendidly."
Lady Grantham paused for a second, as if gathering her thoughts, and her entire demeanour suddenly changed; she cracked a faint, sheepish smile, looking up at Sarah from beneath her lashes almost shyly.
"And I can't think of better arms to catch me when I slip from ladders."
Sarah's jaw dropped as she was momentarily distracted by the revelation, innocent as it was, that the countess did remember about the meeting that meant so much to her.
"This is highly unorthodox, but I really don't see the point in dragging the whole affair any longer... The position is yours if you want it."
Lady Grantham looked at her expectantly, and Sarah struggled to get a grip on the whirlwind of thoughts in her mind. She felt happier than she had felt in a very long time. She had finally achieved her goal, and she could hardly believe that it had been so hard and yet so easy in the end.
"Unless you actually require some time to think about it...?"
Sarah was given a choice, and staring deep into the lady's enthralling blue eyes, without a second of hesitation, she made the wrong one.