I'm cooking breakfast the next day and chatting about what we can do with Toyah today when he catches me totally off guard.
"So I spoke to Susan yesterday." His words go straight to my heart.
"Yeah?" I try to sound nonchalant but totally fuck it up. I'm practically whining.
He tells me that she said she doesn't need his shit and that makes me totally angry. How the fuck dare she say that to him? She's just given birth to his baby for fucks sake!
"You and Toyah are not "shit" that she can sweep under the carpet. You are her husband and Toyah is her young daughter. Toyah needs her mother at this age. If it was me I'd-" Fuck.
He presses me to tell him and when I turn around to explain but he's come right up behind me so I'm face to face with his chest. Oh God.
"I was simply going to say, if it was me, I would treat Toyah like the princess she is and I would never ever let you go." Again. I would never let you go again.
Oh my God I can't believe I just said that, he's going to think I am so weird. Last night was going really nicely and then he shut off again which he keeps doing whenever we're having a good time. I don't know why that is. He stalks out of the kitchen and I want to scream after him. Nothing, anything, just so I can spend a few more seconds with him. I hear the shower turn on and I know the moments gone. My moment. And it's never going to come about again.