[AN: Thanks to my friend SleepingAyumu deviantART who allowed me to borrow her OC Claudia! If you're on dA, please pay her a visit ;v;]

"You look tired, busy night, eh?"

The wink Hannes provided as a follow-up of his words sent a heatwave to my face and I huffed, taking a sharp turn to slap his face with my hair. It was partly meant to hide my bright red blush, but the sharp eyes of his had long registered it. With my back I could feel a giant cheeky smile spreading over his face and once I took my seat behind the desk it was indeed there.

"There's no shame in that we are all adults here. I'm often very tired myself, Claudia knows how to tire me out...That woman is one hell in bed, especially when she-"

"Enough. Please, I don't want to know more."

I groaned, covering my face with both hands. Adults or not, I'd prefer my private life staying private and not becoming a source of gossips. The woman in me hinted Claudia wouldn't be too comfortable knowing her husband went around talking of their sexual life either.

"Fine, fine."

He laughed, waving his hand as if he was to wave the topic off. If it wasn't so early in the morning I would have assumed he was drunk. Yet, there was truth in his words too. I had little sleep night before for the very reason he named, and the ache on my rear and between my thighs was quite bad. My professionalism, however, did not hint that anyhow.

Hannes then put a pile of reports on my desk and I nodded. Although part of Garrison division, I barely did any patrolling or was part of serious actions. My responsibilities were more behind the scenes, dealing with the paper work and providing results, achievements, insights and problems to the top officers. It was an important job and I found pleasure in it, yet it was fairly boring, especially taking into consideration the freedom and excitement Survey Corps dealt with. Yet, it was a job and it was a well paid one. I tried not to complain and did my best, but at times I couldn't shake off a feeling it was Erwin's doing this secure position of an office rat was given to no one but me.

"How's Claudia doing anyways?"

I asked at last. The two were an odd couple, with quite few vivid differences including age, but I was fond of them. Claudia did scare me at times with her harshness, but she was not a bad person overall. The reason I asked is because she, unlike me, was not a slightest bit happy to be in a position that offered any risk. On one hand I understood her – she was a mother to a child still young. On the other, however, I couldn't help but judge it. When my lover would risk his life and lives of his comrades, she would stay behind the wall, hoping and praying no threat ever comes her way.

"Ah… She's good...I guess."

He reached back to scratch his head and I sighed. It was no secret to me Claudia was move than hesitant to be back in military at all, and only fear of being sent to the so called re-claim of Wall Maria drove Hannes into pushing her towards it. A seasoned warrior she might have been, but lack of interest nor passion stripped her off any credit, leaving Claudia just average.

"That's good. She barely appeared in any of the last month's reports, thus I thought it wouldn't hurt to check."

Of course, she hasn't. Mrs Hannes, unlike her husband, barely put any effort into work. I've heard back in a day she was over the moon to join military and had some outstanding passion, but the days were gone since the fall of Shingashina. I couldn't blame her, not without ever seeing a titan myself.

"How's Erwin? Was the expedition successful?"

Unpleasant silence filled the room at once. It wasn't a good question to ask, not when both of us already knew the answer. Whenever Survey Corps went behind the walls they'd never bring good news, only casualties and grief. The crowd would always boo them, disregard the fallen soldiers, belittle their mission. It pained me, and I know it pained Erwin even more.

Despite that indifferent oh-so-royal face he pulled, despite the stoic stance and complete lack of reaction to complains, I, out of all people, knew how deep the words cut him. There were days he could barely cope with it – then he would stay in my arms all day, without saying a word. Sometimes he would tell me about the fallen comrades, as in paying their memory a tribute, and I listened. It seemed to grant him some relief, and him watching him suffer was unbearable.

"Yes...It was… Successful."

Another pause. I just hoped Hannes wouldn't try apologizing for the question – this would make the situation only more awkward than it was. I reverted my gaze to the papers, starting to skim them through although the uneasiness of the moment distracted me a lot, and thus I couldn't understand whatever I was reading.

"You wanted to join the Survey Corps, didn't you? May I ask...What made you change your mind?"

The question of his hit me like a thunder. I did not expect it nor I saw where it came from, but it made my look back up at once. Hannes took a chair and pulled it to himself, taking a seat right in front of me. What was with this sudden confrontation?

"I… I just thought things through, that's it. I realized I'm not well suited for it, that's it. I would be danger to myself and to my comrades."

I could tell he was not convinced. The stare of Hannes was intense and made me uncomfortable, yet he refused to avert it.

"Was it because of Erwin? Did he not let you join?"

I blinked. How could he possibly know it? Not once I hinted to that being the case, it wasn't even openly discussed between ourselves. Erwin only once mentioned he does not want me in Survey Corps, and since then all my efforts to join were futile. I could not help but feel his hand on it, even if Erwin would never confess it.

"This is quite a ridiculous assum-"

"I don't blame him. Back in a day...I was against Claudia joining military at all. Yet, unlike Erwin, I had no power to stop her. I must look like a horrible husband exposing her to danger now, nudging her to put this uniform every day again… I know what you think. But this is not it. I want her to be safe and that's why I urged her to return."

He interrupted me for a monologue, and I understood it was a confession he kept within himself for a long time. The man bowed his head, looking so defeated I couldn't help but feel sorry for him. I reached out to land my hand on his shoulder.

"Hannes. Not for a moment I thought you were a bad person. I'm aware you pushed her to military for her sake, and trust me when I say Claudia knows that much too."

He raised his head and I saw tears shining in his eyes.

"I just...I just don't want her to ever experience what I have. When I first saw a titan… I was so scared I couldn't move, let alone fight it. I allowed my friend to be eaten, I could have saved her had I not been a coward. I live with that guilt ever since, I owe her life to her kid and his friends, and it is difficult to bear. I don't want Claudia to ever experience that… And I think Erwin doesn't want you to ever crumble under weight of those whom you left to die either."

My heart skipped a beat at his words. Hannes had a point – I had no idea how would I react facing a real titan, and yet it wounded me. I was not a frail maiden in distress, my sense of duty was stronger than anything. Sometimes lives had to be sacrificed, I knew that much from Erwin and his crew, yet I believed I was strong enough to cope with it. If he was, I had to as well – Erwin was a strong man, and I wanted to be a strong woman on his side.

"I'm sure this will never happen again, Hannes. And if it does, I'm certain you will be able to protect Claudia from any harm that may come her way. As for your theory regarding Erwin… It is wrong. He has nothing to do with me being here, it was, as I've mentioned, my choice."

Hannes looks both, hurt and relieved. My words did soothe his worries, but he sure sensed dishonesty for the second part, and probably suspected I might be distrusting him. It was not the case, not really...I just did not want to look as if I was babied and protected, even if that was the case.

"Thank you, Delice. I guess I needed to talk to someone. You're always great help."

He gave me a smile and I returned him one as well. We were rather close – professionally close rather than personally. We would not hang out outside work, but at work I knew we had each other's backs and could cry on one another's shoulder had there been a need.

"Anytime, Hannes. If you need to talk, I'm always here."

The older man nodded as he raised off his chair. As he bid me a goodbye and headed to the door, he stopped for a second before taking his leave.

"He is doing it for you. Out of fear of losing you. Don't disregard his efforts."