thanx for reviews and heres this very sad chapter.
Spencer opened her eyes remembering ashley's chicken soup. As she sat up she noticed how beautiful her wife looked as she gazed at her. 'she looks so peaceful. How did I become so lucky? She so so beautiful' she leaned forward and gave her a soft peck on the lips.
She headed downstairs to the kitchen where she started on that chicken soup. 'I hope ashley likes this' spencer thought as she headed upstairs with a tray carrying ashley's food. She opened the door barley with her hand and when she opened it she noticed that ashley's phone was ringing. She got closer and tried reaching for the phone, but couldn't reach it so she let the answering machine answer it.
"Hey, ash its me eddy. So I called to check up on you and you know to see if your done with telling spencer you made her fall in love with you, anyways...um just call me back, bye" BEEP
spencer dropped the tray letting everything fall on the floor. "please...no...I...It ...ccan't" ashley heard the commotion and immediately woke up. "Spencer. What happen?" ashley asked concerned while walking up to spencer.
Spencer moved her teary eyes up to Ashley. "OH, please don't ...please tell me...Its a lie, TELL ME!" ashley getting scared got more closer to spencer. "Spence, tell you what?" angry spencer stepped away from ashley. "You have no right to call me that...I...I feel so stupid. W...Why would you do this to me. Y..Yo...Your breaking my heart."
ashley walked forward trying to get closer to spencer. "I...I don't understand what you're talking about. I would never break your heart because that would be breaking my heart too." ashley said softly. "Don't act stupid. I...I know everything... Tell me ash what are the other conditions because I already know the first two." tears of fury escaladed down spencer's cheek as she spoke. "Spencer, I ...I...dddon't know what yyyou're... talking about." a nervous ashley whispered. Spencer getting more angry got closer to ashley lifted her hand and smacked her on the face. "LAIR!... Stop... just stop lying. I know How you made me fall in love with you for your fucking money." Ashley felt tears grazing down her red cheek where spencer had smacked her. "I...Spencer ..hhhow did you find...out?" Spencer turned giving ashley her back. "Maybe you should trying answering your phone instead of your machine." spencer softly uttered.
Ashley grabbed spencer's arm turning her around to face her. "I never lied to you when I said I love you because I love you and I..." spencer interrupted her pushing her on the bed. "Shut up. You can't say that because those words mean shit to me. You aren't allowed to say those words anymore because you don't know what they mean. All you know is money and selfishness." ashley sat up. "I...I"
"See you can't even say anything. You're full of lies. Why would you do this to me? WHY!" Ashley reached for her, but spencer stepped back. " Don't touch me! ...You don't get to see me like this because it's not fair... It's not fair! I never had loved anybody, but when you came along everything changed. I hated you so much, but you some how manage to get inside me and claim this heart." she spoke these words as her fist pounded her chest where her heart lays.
Ashley grabbed her arms and forced her into a hug. Spencer tried pulling away and started hitting her chest, but soon gave in as tear after tear descended from her eyes. "I hate you. I hate you" she whispered. Ashley wouldn't let her go she was so scared of letting her go. "I'm sorry...I'm so...so...so sorry" ashley whispered on to her as she lay kisses on her head.
Spencer cried and cried as as felt her heart shatter in pieces. She stopped her movements and held on to ashley more tighter letting every tear of rage land on her. "why...why."
ashley lifted spencer's head with her hands. "I wanted to tell you, but ...but I could never have taken the chance of losing you. When you said that you hated me I hated you too, but the more time I was with you the more I started loving you" spencer moved her gaze down. "Love is like trust once you betray love. The trust is gone." spencer pushed ashley away. "When I was with you I thought I knew you, but now I don't even know who the fuck you are because everything you had said was a lie." ashley's looked down at the floor. "I don't know what to do anymore" a desperate tearful ashley answered.
"there is nothing to do. I should have of followed my instincts and just play make believe with this fake marriage." spencer whipped away the tears that were coming. Ashley ran her hands through her hair. "What will it take for you to believe me? I' ll do whatever, but believe me when I say that I love you."
"Believe you? Are you serious you want me to trust you when you didn't even trust me and confessed to me all your selfish bullshit!" spencer screamed.
I'm so lost I don't know what to do I love ashley, but this is too much I don't think I could handle this. She lied to me after everything that I confessed to her. I still love her even though she did this to me and thats why I hate myself right now because I can't hate her and its killing me' her mind was clouded by fears and she soon felt ashley's hands on top of her arm. "would you have stayed with me if I would've told you the truth way before any of this had happen?"
spencer stared into sad and confused brown eyes not knowing what to answer. "I...I don't know. I'm so lost right now... I just don't know and it hurts to know everything we have been through was a big lie." ashley pulled her closer to her where they were only inches apart. "spencer, this... between us is not a lie because every time we made love it was beautiful and those memories are always on my mind from your kisses to your touches." ashley leaned forward resting her forehead on Spencer's. "Please forgive me. I will do anything for you and for your forgiveness, but please forgive me" spencer moved her head to the side. "I don't think I can and I'll never know if I can forgive you." ashley kissed spencer on the cheek tasting the salty tear as it slowly drifted on to her lips. "You mean so much to me that I would give my life to you and everything around it. Nothing matters to me if your not with me." ashley softly whispered on her cheek.
Spencer closed her eyes and stepped away from ashley's reach. "You should have thought about that when you decided to lie to me. I believed you when you said you loved me and now that I know the truth. I I feel so used and stupid."
"I do love you and I won't stop loving you. I think you underestimate me because the reason why I didn't tell you was because you would end up getting hurt just like me and everything would be a huge mess just like now." ashley said looking at spencer. "I can't hear those words anymore so just stop they hurt so much. The pain of those words poison my heart whenever you say them."
spencer went towards the bed and seated herself down. She was tired of fighting and crying for something that was fake and unreal. "Now looking back on those memories that you spoke of I finally realize how everything was planned. How you manage to win my love." ashley went to her side kneeling down in front of her. "I never planned on anything . What happen between us is true and I don't regret falling in love with you." spencer covered her face with her hands not bearing to look into ashley's eyes. "I think we should take time apart and not see each other anymore." she lifted her gaze from her hands to ashley wanting to see her reaction.
Ashley wrapped her arms around spencer's legs letting her head fall on her lap. "please don't leave me...I need you...your my love... my only love" ashley cried on to her lap.
Spencer laid her hands on ashley's head softly messaging through her hair. " Its the best thing for us ash. I don't think I could live with these lies anymore. They just hurt and I' m tired of always fighting for something that's not even real. This is the only thing left to do . We need a break from each other and all this." spencer softly spoke.
Ashley nodded her side to side. "NO!...I..I don't you away from me. Your my life can't you see that. Your my everything." ashley lifted her tear stained face looking into spencer's face. "More than money? Do you really love me more than anything? Spencer asked fearing ashley's response.
...
"hello" a husky voice spoke
"hey alex, it's me aiden"
"who the fuck is aiden." the girl spoke annoyed
"remember ashley's boyfriend...well ex-boyfriend." aiden said getting angry
" why the hell are you calling me. Did ashley die or something?"
" No, but you would like that wouldn't you." aiden said in a teasing voice
"yea I would. Is there something you want say because I'm not wasting my time talking about my twin sister." alex felt her anger arise with the mentioning of her sister.
" Oh... yea sorry for bothering you, but how would you like to fuck over your sister?" aiden asked hoping alex would agree
"Really and why would I fuck with ashley. IF she is already dead to me."
" Aren't you mad for everything she caused and how your father ended up hating you because of her fault?" aiden knew the history of the twins, but ashley only metioned it onetime when she was drunk with him so his memory was vague about the subject.
"listen aiden why don't we meet up and discuss the subject in person instead of by telephone, I'll meet you tomorrow at Liberty Park at two." she hung up leaving aiden on the line
"yea okay...hello?" aiden hung up with a smirk on face.