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Chapter 12

Akaashi had no warnings whatsoever.

One moment, he was playing long notes to warm up, and the next he knew, the door to his practice room flung open. It made Akaashi fumble with his violin, causing his bow to screech on the strings as he stuttered to a stop. And when he looked up, he was met with a familiar face whose eyes were so cold that it sent chills down his spine.

"So, Keiji. Would you mind explaining to me what this is all about?"

Akaashi froze on the spot, watching as the practice room door shut behind his angry father. The small room suddenly felt incredibly cramped, making him claustrophobic.

Oh, look who is here!

"Father," Akaashi acknowledged. He tried to ignore the mocking voice but his face went pale from shock. He stood straighter, lowering his violin and bow to his sides. "What are you doing here?"

"I caught wind that you were auditioning at this establishment," his father seethed, folding his arms across his chest. "Care to explain why? Is Tokyo Phil too good for you?"

Akaashi sucked in a breath and held it in his chest painfully.

Uh, oh. Looks like you got caught. Way to go, genius.

"What are you talking about?" Akaashi asked, and was his voice shaking? "I thought you would be proud that I was auditioning for a spot at all."

"Not if you're my son. You know damn well that Tokyo Phil competes with this orchestra every year for patrons," his father spat. "And you decide to audition here? With my name?"

Akaashi's brow twitched. "It's not as if I belong to you."

"You do if you hold my last name," his father replied.

"What?" Akaashi asked, voice clipped and short. "You don't own me. You and Mom didn't even want me."

Oof. Was that really the right thing to say?

His father let out a low growl as he grit his teeth and curled his hands into fists. Akaashi backed up a step, feeling his back lightly bump into the wall behind him. The small space was really starting to feel too small now.

"You still haven't learned to watch your mouth! Have you no respect?" his father yelled, stepping closer to him.

Akaashi's heart did a strange leap in his chest, the sensation traveling down to make his stomach flutter. Something about the look in his father's eyes was different than it had been before.

Oh, wow! He's really angry, huh? You're such an idiot.

Akaashi winced and shifted over to where his violin case sat, lowering the instrument safely inside. He turned back to face his father, eyeing him carefully.

"I'm just trying to audition for this spot," Akaashi tried calmly.

"Without consulting me first?!" his father accused, taking another step forward.

"I don't need your permission. I can make my own decisions," Akaashi said.

"By supporting something that goes against me?" his father added. His lips curled downward in a snarl, and his hands went into fists. "I gave you everything, boy! Everything that got you to this level, it was all because of me! Your father, don't you remember?"

Akaashi felt something sour in his gut at his words. Sure, his father encouraged him to pursue violin. And sure, his father helped him through his lessons and through school. He was grateful for all of it.

But not once had he been a proper father. He never helped him with homework or took him to the park. Walks to school were lonely and his dinners were always prepared by the butler, only for him to eat at the table in silence. His father didn't even show up at the hospital when he came down with pneumonia, and when he cried, his lungs only protested in agony as they burned inside of his chest, making it impossible to sleep. He's forever hated hospitals because of it, and he forever knew that if something were to happen to him, his parents wouldn't care.

His father was everything he never wanted to be.

He couldn't do that to Tobio.

Go ahead and tell him off. You deserve it.

"Of course, I remember," Akaashi muttered. "I remember every single time you weren't there for me!"

His father's eyes widened, his back straightening as Akaashi continued to yell, his body quivering with anger.

"You left me alone every day! You never spoke to me unless it was about something that you needed!" Akaashi yelled. He choked on a breath as a lump forced its way into his throat. "You abandoned me at that hospital—"

"The doctors kept us well informed on your health—"

"But you never visited!" Akaashi yelled, clenching his teeth. "You never cared! You only ever care about your stupid reputation and your damn ego!"

Akaashi took a tense moment to inhale a shaking breath as he glanced up at his father. The older man's eyes were dark, threatening, and ready to explode. Akaashi knew he was treading the line, right at the edge and nearly crossing it. All he had to do was say one thing, just one little thing, and the line would snap.

He took a deep breath.

He had held back for too long.

He decided to take a giant leap over that line.

"I never want to be a bastard of a father like you! I hope your company fails!"

The words were out, bouncing along the white walls of the practice room and echoing back into Akaashi's ears.

Hahaha! Nice one! Let's hope he doesn't kill you now.

The voice's mockery made his stomach drop as he recoiled in the horrifying realization of what he had just said, and he barely had a second to think before his father lunged forward and grabbed his collar, his face twisted in a dark gaze.

"I've had it with your mouth," his father said under his breath. "I will make you regret ever coming here today!"

He raised a hand up in the air, and Akaashi closed his eyes, bracing for the blow that his yammering mouth certainly deserved.

What a fool you are!

Yes, Akaashi thought, squeezing his eyes tighter. He was certainly the biggest fool of them all.

Suddenly, the practice room door slammed open again, smacking hard into the wall and causing a loud noise to pierce Akaashi's ears. Then, he heard a familiar voice yelling into the small room.

And the familiar voice was angry.

"Oi, let go of him!"

Suddenly, his father's hands were ripped away from his collar, causing him to stumble backwards. His back hit the wall, knocking the wind out of him. He winced, his lungs sucking in harsh breaths as he slid to the floor, his hand clutching his chest. He shut his eyes and tried to will the pain away.

"Daddy!"

Akaashi's eyes forced themselves open and he was met with a concerned Tobio. His tiny hands were touching Akaashi's knees but he could barely feel them with his body trembling.

"Daddy, what's going on?" Tobio asked, looking teary-eyed and fearful.

Akaashi blinked for a moment, trying to sort out his frazzled brain. "Tobio, I—"

"What the hell do you think you're doing?!"

Akaashi snapped his head up, his eyes widening in shock.

Bokuto was holding Akaashi's father by his collar, his teeth bared in a snarl and his eyes wild.

Akaashi felt his heart flip. He had seen Bokuto angry. But this was a whole new level.

Bokuto seemed to be holding back his rage.

"Get your hands off of me!" his father snapped, grabbing Bokuto's hands.

"Not until you tell me why the hell you were attacking my friend!" Bokuto growled back.

Bokuto wrenched away from his grasp, both men letting go of each other and panting slightly.

"This has nothing to do with you, boy," his father hissed.

"It does if you're hurting my friend!" Bokuto yelled, stepping closer to the older man. His eyes narrowed in a threatening glare, sending a chill down Akaashi's spine. "You need to leave. Now."

"Mind your own business," his father spat. "This is my own son's poor choice. He isn't fit to do something like this."

He turned to Akaashi, his eyes lit with hot rage that made Akaashi wince. He took a step towards them, and Akaashi felt his panic spike.

Was he going to hurt him?

Was he going to hurt Tobio?!

Akaashi tugged Tobio closer to him and held the back of his head, trying desperately to protect his son from his rampaging father. He knew his father could get angry, even enough to strike him, but he had no idea what he would do to a child.

Especially since his father hated this child.

"Hey!" Bokuto yelled, lunging forward and grabbing Akaashi's father by the wrist. "Leave them alone!"

He yanked Akaashi's father back, causing the older man to stumble, running into the music stand and knocking it over, sending music sheets flying. The sound made Tobio jump, and Akaashi squeezed him harder against his chest.

His father and Bokuto suddenly got into a shouting match as each wrestled for dominance. Their shouts increased as they became more physical, his father reaching forward to grab Bokuto's collar.

The noise was overwhelming. All of his senses were flooding at once. His chest tightened painfully. It was getting harder to breathe.

Suddenly, Bokuto's eyes flashed as a fist came flying and hit his cheek.

Akaashi's eyes widened in horror as Bokuto's head snapped to the side, a grunt escaping his lips.

"Bo—"

Akaashi tried to say Bokuto's name but his lungs constricted, making him gasp painfully. Tobio leaned up from his chest and stared up at his father with concerned eyes.

"Daddy, what's wrong?" Tobio asked, reaching up to tug on the sleeve of his shirt.

Akaashi inhaled again but the air seemed to stop at his throat.

He could not breathe.

"Leave, damn it!" Bokuto yelled, throwing a punch of his own on the older man's face.

Akaashi's father stumbled backwards but Bokuto hauled him up by his shirt and threw him out of the practice room, his father tumbling to the ground.

Akaashi choked on a breath, feeling his chest tighten. It was so painful and tight and his thoughts were spiraling out of control and he could not breathe—

"If I see your face again, I swear, you'll be sorry!" Bokuto yelled.

And with a growl, Bokuto slammed the door to the practice room shut, leaving the room quiet.

"Crazy bastard…" Bokuto mumbled, turning back around. Once his gaze landed on Akaashi, his eyes blew wide with alarm. "Akaashi!"

In an instant, Bokuto was on his knees next to Akaashi's side, pulling Tobio away and resting his hands on Akaashi's shoulders.

"Akaashi, hey, hey… It's all right, it's okay. It's over," Bokuto said.

Akaashi tried sucking in another breath and he shook his head in confusion. Why did Bokuto look so strange and concerned? Even Tobio, who sat next to him with his hands tightly gripping his pants, looked on with fear in his eyes.

"Akaashi, you need to slow down your breathing. You're panicking," Bokuto said.

The words "I'm fine" were on Akaashi's tongue and he opened his mouth to force them out, but the sound came out raspy and weak.

"Breathe with me, okay? Can you do that, Akaash'?" Bokuto asked.

A strangled noise seeped from Akaashi's throat, and Bokuto's brows furrowed nervously.

Bokuto leaned forward and slid off Akaashi's tie and made quick work of unbuttoning his shirt. Then, he took one of Akaashi's hands and placed it on Bokuto's chest. His other hand went to Akaashi's chest, his palm warm through the white undershirt.

"Here, match my breathing, Akaashi," Bokuto said. He breathed in, and Akaashi could feel Bokuto's chest move up and down with the motion. "Do you feel that? Copy me. Here."

Bokuto breathed again, his chest rising under Akaashi's palm. He tried to mimic the motion with his own breath but it came out of his mouth stuttered and shallow.

"That was a good job. Try again," Bokuto said. "Breathe in. Slowly."

Akaashi purposely slowed his breathing, concentrating with all his might to copy Bokuto's movements exactly. His fingers shifted on Bokuto's broad chest as he flattened his palm against it. After a second or two, he could feel Bokuto's heart slamming away.

It made Akaashi's heart jolt.

Even though he was calm and collected, Bokuto was just as nervous as Akaashi was.

"You're not doing it, Akaashi," Bokuto said, snapping him out of his reverie.

He followed Bokuto's soft instructions for what felt like hours, the pain in his chest dissipating as well as the violent tremors in his limbs. His mind cleared with each breath, the fog that he was once lost in finally lifting, and he was able to distinctly see the practice room in front of him. His heart no longer felt out of control, but the stress of it all left him panting and exhausted.

"There, you're calming down," Bokuto said with a smile. He patted Akaashi's chest lightly. "Can you breathe okay?"

Akaashi breathed in deeply and nodded, sitting up and letting his head rest against the wall behind him.

"Yes. Thank you, Bokuto-san," Akaashi said with quivering breaths, letting his hand slide off of Bokuto's chest.

"Good," Bokuto said. He finally removed his hand from Akaashi's chest but it only moved to rest on his shoulder. "How are you feeling?"

Akaashi felt damp from sweat, his fancy clothes now too sticky to be comfortable. He wiped his forehead and slid his palm to cover his eyes, sighing heavily. Tired. He felt tired.

"Daddy?"

Akaashi flinched and dropped his hand, turning to see Tobio staring at him with a few tears trailing down his cheeks and snot starting to creep out of his nose.

"Oh, Tobio," Bokuto said softly, reaching around the boy to hold his shoulders carefully. "He's okay now. He was just feeling a little sick."

"Sick?" Tobio asked him.

"Mmn," Bokuto said as he nodded his head and smiled sadly. He rubbed Tobio's back and wiped his face with his sleeve. "He's going to be just fine."

Tobio's lips wobbled but he nodded, his hands clutching the bottom of his shirt.

"There we go," Bokuto said once Tobio's face was clean. "Okay. Why don't we get off the floor?"

Akaashi breathed out slowly and watched as Bokuto stood to his feet, hooking his hands under Tobio's arms to get him up as well. Then, he extended a hand down to Akaashi. His smile was small, but it was there. Akaashi felt some comfort in it, though, and it gave him enough energy to grab his hand.

In one gentle tug, Bokuto hoisted Akaashi up to his feet. He stumbled a bit, bracing against Bokuto's shoulders as his legs wobbled.

"Easy there," Bokuto said, gripping his upper arms. "You okay?"

Akaashi could barely stand, but the shame of his friend finding out was too much to bear. He kept his gaze focused on the ground as he nodded, his hands fisting in Bokuto's shirt.

"Okay," Bokuto replied, his voice uncharacteristically quiet. "Why don't we go get some water and then rest, yeah?"

Akaashi knew it wasn't really a question. It was just like the night on the bridge. Bokuto had every intention of forcing him to get that coffee, but he still asked.

Akaashi nodded, forcing himself to stand up straight.

Bokuto smiled, his eyes light and his eyes glowing. He glanced down at Tobio, reaching out to take his hand.

"Okay! One water bottle for you, and a milk for the little man!"

The walk around the music hall to the vending machines was the exercise Akaashi needed to work out the jitters and tingles in his legs. His heart still pounded an unsteady rhythm that pulsed in his ears, but he no longer felt that the world was spiraling out of control.

And, luckily, his father was nowhere in sight.

Akaashi's hands shook as he lifted the newly purchased water bottle to his lips, the water quenching his thirst as if he had not had anything to drink in days. Tobio was sitting on the bench next to him, a small milk carton held in his hands as he sucked it down through a straw.

Bokuto had also bought water, but he held it in his hands as he fidgeted in front of them. It was as if he had a question, and Akaashi felt that at any moment, he would—

"Akaashi," Bokuto started hesitantly.

Ah. He knew Bokuto would crack.

"Yes?" Akaashi said, taking the bottle away from his mouth. His throat felt as if he had swallowed glass but his voice no longer showed any evidence.

Bokuto glanced down at the water bottle in his hands, his lips pursing as he studied its contents. After a quick breath through his nose, he lifted his gaze to stare back at him.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Bokuto asked.

Akaashi paused, looking at Bokuto curiously. His eyes were squinted a little in concern, and his brows were pressed together.

"Mmn," Akaashi hummed. "I'm fine."

There was a beat of silence as Bokuto straightened his back, his face serious and solemn. It was a strange look on him, Akaashi noted. He preferred Bokuto's charming smile to anything else.

"What do you want to do?" Bokuto asked, looking down the hallway that led to the auditorium.

Akaashi followed his gaze and breathed, the water bottle crinkling in his hands. He glanced down at Tobio by his side, who was still drinking his milk contentedly. He glanced up at his father and stared with reddened eyes, still sore from his crying. Akaashi winced, feeling guilty for putting the boy through so many traumas in one day.

"I don't know. Tobio's had a long day, and…"Akaashi answered, lifting a hand to run his fingers through Tobio's hair. He noticed his hands trembling again, making him wince. "…and I'm not sure I could do the audition now."

Both Tobio and Bokuto sputtered, making him jump.

"What?!" Bokuto said, kneeling down in front of him. "Why do you think that, Akaashi? You're not still thinking that you're not good enough, are you?"

Akaashi fidgeted, messing with the lid of his water bottle.

"This is my own son's poor choice. He isn't fit to do something like this."

His father's words still rang in his ears.

"Maybe my father was right," Akaashi said. "I'm… probably not making the best decision by doing this audition."

"Don't say that, Akaashi," Bokuto said, his voice pleading. He placed one hand on Akaashi's knee. "Your father didn't know what he was saying. He was wrong to tell you that. You're strong. You're not unfit to do anything."

Akaashi bit his lip and sniffled. He felt worn down just by speaking.

"I think you could do it, Akaashi," Bokuto continued. "But if you want to leave, I'm right behind you."

Akaashi looked at him, brow quirked. "You really think I could do it?"

Bokuto nodded, smiling softly. "Of course! You're Akaashi! You're amazing at this."

Akaashi sniffed a bit and reached up to rub his eye, trying to press the tears back into their ducts. He took a slow breath to calm the sobs that desperately clawed to escape and he glanced back up at Bokuto, dropping his hand to his lap.

Bokuto looked determined and sure, his smile encouraging and his gentle touch at his knee comforting. It made Akaashi feel that someone cared.

"I want to give it a try," he said suddenly.

Bokuto's eyes lit up like fireworks, his hand squeezing Akaashi's knee out of excitement.

"Really? You'll still audition?" Bokuto asked.

Akaashi wiped his nose and nodded, clutching the water bottle to his chest. And Bokuto stood to his feet and placed his hands on his hips.

"All right! Did ya hear that, Tobio? Your dad is gonna get himself an orchestra job!" Bokuto said.

Akaashi breathed out quietly as Bokuto and Tobio spoke with excitement in their voices about the upcoming audition. With their enthusiasm buzzing around him, Akaashi felt that he could finally move on from his embarrassing episode earlier. He really owed Bokuto for all of this.

"Well, you should get back to the practice room, right?" Bokuto asked. "You still have about 40 minutes until your audition time."

Akaashi struggled to hold back the grimace from appearing on his face. Had he really panicked for that long? He lost a lot of time but he could still warm up enough to be ready.

He nodded and pushed himself up from the bench and onto his wobbly legs. Bokuto grabbed his bicep to steady him, and once he gained his footing, he let go. He thanked Bokuto quietly as he grabbed his violin and his bag and led them down the hall to the practice rooms. Bokuto and Tobio followed him right to the door of the same practice room they had vacated earlier.

"Good luck, Akaashi. Just text me if you need anything, okay? I'm here to help," Bokuto said, giving him a soft smile.

"Me, too!" Tobio said, lifting up his hand to tug on Akaashi's shirt.

Akaashi nodded to them, thankful, and turned towards the door. But he paused just before he entered the practice room and eyed Bokuto's face. The evidence of his father's punch was definitely starting to show on his friend's cheekbone, and Akaashi wouldn't be surprised if Bokuto had a black eye tomorrow. He winced at the thought, suddenly feeling a little guilty.

With a small sigh, he grabbed the water bottle from Bokuto's hand, startling the man a little, and he lifted the bottle to press against the reddened skin around his eye. Bokuto jumped at the cold, his eyes widening from the contact.

"Akaashi?" he said quietly.

"Keep this on your face. It's not as cold as an ice pack, but it should help to prevent swelling," Akaashi said.

Bokuto hesitated for only a second before taking the bottle from Akaashi's hand and pressing it to his face. He nodded mutely, looking almost like a child. It warmed Akaashi's heart a bit and he smiled at Bokuto.

"I'll see you afterwards, Bokuto-san," Akaashi said, turning towards the practice room. "Thank you for watching Tobio."

He took a step to go inside, ready to open the door.

"Um! Akaashi!"

Akaashi stopped and turned back at the sound of Bokuto's voice. "Yes, Bokuto-san?"

Before Akaashi could get all of the words out, he was wrapped up in a bone-crushing hug, his face pressed into a bulky shoulder. He stiffened only for a moment until he heard Bokuto speak.

"You can do it, Akaashi!" Bokuto said at his ear. "I have your back, one-hundred percent."

Akaashi felt his eyes water. He reached up and clutched onto Bokuto's shirt, returning the hug with a squeeze of his own. He rarely received hugs as a child, and he often found them uncomfortable, but with Bokuto, it felt like the most natural thing in the world.

"Thank you, Bokuto-san," Akaashi said.

"Mmn. You're welcome, 'Kaashi."

With one more squeeze, they separated and Akaashi gave them both a wave as he dipped into the practice room, the noises all fading. In the silence, Akaashi felt his body unwind and relax, the adrenaline finally leaving his system.

He could do this. Bokuto believed in him. If Bokuto believed he could, then he had the strength to go through with it.

The violin case in his hand suddenly felt heavier, reminding him of the task at hand. He took a deep breath and got back to work, taking his instrument out and bowing a few notes to get his fingers warm. The shaking finally ceased as he got more into a groove, and he felt his posture grow more rigid as his muscles tensed.

After taking the time to become familiar with his instrument in the limited time available, Akaashi emerged from the practice room. The hallway was noisy but empty, and Akaashi let himself breathe. He half expected Bokuto and Tobio to still be waiting for him against the wall.

He shut the door behind him and took careful steps towards the hallway where the side door to the auditorium lied. He could feel his heart throbbing inside of his chest as it sped faster and faster with each step.

As turned the corner, his brow twitched when he noticed that the voice was silent.

It was an unsettling feeling. He must have been more nervous than he originally thought.

As he came upon the door, he was met with two monitors, both standing next to a desk outside the door. They had clipboards in their hands and soft smiles on their faces. When they noticed Akaashi approaching, they stopped in their whispering to look at him.

"Hello, there. You're Akaashi-san, I presume?" one of them asked.

Akaashi managed to swallow past the lump. "Yes."

"Okay! We were just about to go looking for you, but you're just in time. The last audition just left, so you're up."

Akaashi took a slow breath and nodded. He watched the monitor open up the door to the auditorium, and Akaashi got a glimpse of the edge of the stage. A flurry of nervous butterflies surged up from his toes and through his stomach, making him shiver slightly.

"You can go on in. The panel is ready for you."

At the monitor's voice, Akaashi jumped, and he turned towards them and bowed his head, muttering out a shaky "thanks."

Once inside the auditorium, Akaashi could see the panel of judges sitting in the audience. There were three of them, and Akaashi had a feeling that one of them was the conductor.

Akaashi swallowed and made his way up to the stage. He set his music down on the stand and took a deep breath, lightly shaking the tingles out of his hands.

This is familiar, Akaashi told himself. This is normal and he's done this before.

No need to be nervous.

He's stood in a stage before.

This was nothing to be worried about.

"Welcome. Please play the first Mozart excerpt."

Akaashi stiffened. The lights from the ceiling made it hard to tell who exactly asked him to play.

He quickly shuffled the music around on his stand until he got to the Mozart excerpt. He looked at the notes carefully for a moment, refreshing his mind of the symphony and the exact sound that the judges would want. It was light, delicate, yet challenging.

Then, he tucked his violin under his chin and then gently placed the bow across the strings. With a deep breath through his nose, he began to play.

He did not dare look up at the judges as he played, his mind struggling to concentrate on each note.

Did it sound good? Was it what they were looking for? What did they think? What did he even sound like right now? Did that one note sound right?

He got to the climax of the excerpt, his left hand vibrating the string with increased passion, his heart swelling with the mood as it lifted into the air and—

"Okay, okay. That's enough."

Akaashi jolted to a stop, his bow screeching to a halt. He lifted his head to look for some sort of cue from the judges but they all were furiously writing something down on their clipboards.

Akaashi's heart rose to his throat.

Did he sound that badly that they had to stop him?

"Okay. Move on to the Beethoven excerpt, please."

Akaashi's lips wobbled as he shifted around the music again. Were they just trying to get rid of him faster? Get his audition over with?

With tears in his eyes, Akaashi pressed onward. He lifted his violin and bow and began to play the next excerpt.

Bokuto leaned back against the white, soft wall behind the bench, letting his head bump against the smooth surface. He and Tobio had found the same bench that they had occupied earlier. With all of the excitement, Tobio was fast asleep, using the duffle bag as a pillow and Bokuto's jacket as a blanket. Bokuto sighed softly, keeping his breaths quiet so he did not disturb the sleeping child next to him.

Bokuto's body was jittery, making his stomach twist. His hands fidgeted in his lap while his leg bounced anxiously. He was a bundle of nerves all over again, just like the night he coaxed Akaashi down from the bridge. He had hoped his face did not betray his anxiety when giving his encouragement to Akaashi. The last thing his friend needed was more distress.

He sighed again, letting out a soft whine. He needed to calm himself down before Akaashi got back from his audition. He had to be strong for Akaashi but he found himself starting to spiral into his own sense of panic.

He huffed, making the final decision.

Pulling out his phone, he quickly searched for Kuroo's contact and dialed the number. After a few rings, a familiar, gravelly voice answered.

"Eh? Bo? What's up? Why're you calling so early?" Kuroo greeted.

Bokuto quirked a brow, twisted his lips to the side. "It's after twelve, Kuroo."

"Yeah, on a Saturday. You know I like to sleep in on the weekend," Kuroo said with a yawn. "Where are you, anyway? Are you out? You wouldn't be calling me from our kitchen, would you?"

"Ah, no," Bokuto answered, rubbing the back of his neck. "Akaashi's audition is today."

"Oh, that's right. How is he?"

Bokuto bit his lip, the unsettling feeling coming back to attack his stomach in full force. Seeing Akaashi panic was scary. Seeing him unable to breathe was frightening.

But the worst of it was seeing Akaashi's eyes. They were blown wide and so full of terror that Bokuto considered calling for help. He was one second away from calling for an ambulance when Akaashi finally started to breathe properly and recognition lit up in his eyes.

While Bokuto was relieved that Akaashi finally calmed down, it was overshadowed by the overwhelming feeling of fear, and it was then that Bokuto realized that he didn't want to lose him.

He didn't want to lose Akaashi.

"Bo?"

Kuroo's voice startled him back to reality, and the music hall's entrance came back into view. He swallowed and breathed in slowly, noticing that his heart had picked up again.

"Yeah, he's…" Bokuto clicked his mouth shut. He knew Kuroo was perceptive to a fault. He would be able to hear through Bokuto's lies and eventually drag out the truth sooner or later.

Bokuto cleared his throat.

"Akaashi's father showed up and threatened to hurt him," Bokuto said. He winced as he looked down in his lap. "Akaashi had a panic attack."

"W-What?" Kuroo said in alarm. Bokuto noted the slight hint of anger in his voice. "Is he okay? Did he get hurt?"

"No, no. I managed to get there in time before he hurt him," Bokuto said.

"Oh. That's good," Kuroo said, a little calmer. "Well, did you call the police or something to stop his dad?"

"Ah, well…" Bokuto lifted up his free hand to gently touch the bruise surrounding his eye. "No. I handled it myself."

There was a pause.

"Don't tell me you punched him."

Bokuto pouted. "Well, he punched me first…"

"Bokuto!" Kuroo scolded, making Bokuto wince and pull the phone away from his ear for a moment. He heard Kuroo sigh, and he could picture him rubbing his eyes. "Are you hurt?"

Bokuto smiled softly at his friend's concern. He knew that Kuroo couldn't stay mad at him for long.

"I'll probably have a black eye tomorrow, but that's all," he answered.

"Okay. And Akaashi?" Kuroo said. "Is he okay, or…?"

"Ah, he's auditioning now," Bokuto replied.

"Oh? Really?" Kuroo said in surprise.

Bokuto bit his lip, feeling his mood start to drop again as the heavy weight of guilt pressed on his shoulders.

"I… I encouraged him to go through with it," Bokuto said. "Was… that the wrong thing to do?"

He had been concerned for the past hour that he had not made the right choice. What if pushing Akaashi was not what he needed right now? What if Akaashi spiraled into more panic?

What if Akaashi hated him for this?

"No, no. That's good," Kuroo said.

Bokuto sat up straighter on the bench, surprised. "Really? Akaashi won't be mad at me for this?"

"Of course not, Bo," Kuroo said. "You turned a terrible situation and made it positive. You normalized everything. You made the right call."

Bokuto inhaled sharply and breathed out just as quickly. He nodded to himself, as if he answered his own question, and he gripped his knee with his free hand.

"Thank you, Kuroo," Bokuto said.

"Mmn. So, when are you heading back?" Kuroo asked. "I guess I should start getting food together before the guys come over."

"Ah, yeah that's today, isn't it?" Bokuto said thoughtfully, rubbing his chin.

"Yeah. Akaashi's welcome to come, if he wants," Kuroo said.

"Mmn. I'll ask Akaashi whenever he gets done," Bokuto said. "Which should be—"

Suddenly, the double doors on the far end opened, and out came Akaashi with his head hanging and his violin held limply in his hand.

"Oh! Akaashi's back. I'll see you later, Kuroo," Bokuto said.

"Good luck!"

Bokuto hung up the phone and carefully shook Tobio's shoulder to wake him.

"Daddy's back," Bokuto said to him when he opened his eyes.

With those two words, Tobio leaned up in a flash and hopped off of the bench, hurrying over to meet Akaashi halfway and hug his leg. Akaashi stopped when Tobio hugged him and he patted his head gently.

Bokuto hurried over to them with a smile, but it quickly slipped from his face when he saw Akaashi's reddened eyes.

"Akaashi?" Bokuto said, approaching him carefully. He put a hand on his shoulder. "Are you okay?"

Akaashi glanced up at him and nodded, and Bokuto could see the slight glisten in his eyes.

"What's wrong?" Bokuto asked. "Your eyes, they… You look like you were crying."

"Ah," Akaashi said, lifting up his free hand to touch his eye. "I kinda… messed up, I think."

Bokuto's heart sunk into his stomach. "Messed up?"

"Yeah, maybe…" Akaashi said, his eyes narrowing as he tried to hold back his tears, and the sight broke Bokuto's heart. He desperately wanted to ask all of the details, but being out in the open like this was not the best place.

"Okay, Akaashi," Bokuto said.

Bokuto leaned forward and took Akaashi's things from him, making him startle slightly. He glanced up at Bokuto with wide, confused eyes.

"Bokuto-san?" Akaashi asked as Bokuto turned and headed to the bench to grab the rest of his things. "What are you doing? Where are we going?"

Bokuto tossed a small smile over his shoulder.

"My place!" Bokuto said. "And we're gonna get food!"