"Although Toriel and Asgore have their differences, I think they could find common ground in their love for Frisk. Especially if they ever needed them both, at the same time. It wouldn't magically fix their relationship. I'm just saying I think they could get over themselves long enough to help Frisk." -Francine I. Kane, 201X-
Chapter 6: Echo! Echo. echo…
Frisk was dozing when someone knocked on her door. She awoke with a start before saying, "Who's there?"
She still had the cool cloth draped over her eyes, but Frisk heard the door open and Papyrus' voice saying, "YOUR HIGHNESS, YOUR PARENTS ARE HERE TO SEE YOU."
She sat up as she said, "Thank you, Papyrus. Let them in, please." As he did, Frisk took the cloth off her eyes and blinked several times. Everything remained blurred splotches of color, but at least she wasn't completely blind, or in any more pain. If anything, the pain medicine was starting to make her feel a little too good…
Case in point, when her parents entered the room she burst out in a giggle fit. The walls were white, as was their fur, so all she could see were the vague shapes of their clothes moving closer. "Tee hee hee hee! Your clothes look like they're floating! Papa's beard, too!" She continued to giggle as Toriel and Asgore took seats on either side of the bed.
"I am happy to see you in such good spirits, Frisk," said the king. "How are you feeling?"
"Giggly," said Frisk. "You may want to tell the doctors to cut back on whatever they gave me for pain. It's working a little too well, I think! Tee hee hee!"
"We will do so, my child," said Toriel as she took one of Frisk's hands into hers. "However… I do not believe that is all Asgore was asking."
Frisk's giggles suddenly stopped. She looked toward Asgore as he said, "Toriel is correct." Asgore took her other hand in his. "I saw how you were vacillating between fighting and mercy… You were in more than just physical pain at that moment. So… how are you feeling, now?"
Frisk looked down at her own lap, not really focusing on anything (she couldn't focus anyway, so that helped.) She didn't know how to answer that question, but she didn't really feel like lying to her parents, or herself, at the moment.
"I… I don't know. It's all so jumbled up I'm almost numb. I can't pick one emotion to feel."
"Then tell us everything you are feeling," said the king. As Frisk remained silent, he gently said, "No matter what it is, your mother and I will not think any less of you, or stop caring about you. You are our daughter, our precious child. You brought the sun back into our lives when nothing but the dark surrounded us. You are our sun! So please, tell us. What is clouding your skies, Frisk?"
Frisk thought she could hear the sincerity in Asgore's words, though she almost didn't want to believe it was there. But with big, warm hands holding both of her own, she felt so small… and safe. It was the first time she could let herself feel safe. Toriel and Asgore were nothing like her human parents…
Frisk's face threatened to crumple with the onset of more tears, but she stopped them just in time. She had never been such a crybaby on the surface, and it was high time she got a hold of herself. She still had the swallow a few times before she could speak.
"I… I'm just… I was so happy! I gained a father AND a mother that truly cared, the kingdom accepted me, I was set to learn even more about monsters than I could ever dream about… And then that… that THING falls into the Ruins when I go and see a friend! He just can't leave me alone! He always ruins everything! It's not fair!
"I hate him. I can't think of anyone or anything I hate more than him, but I hate that I hate him! It makes me mad, knowing I can waste my energy on an emotion for someone I don't want to feel ANYTHING for. But that doesn't make the feeling go away. It just makes it worse."
Frisk's hands tightened on her parents' as she went on. "And now… I don't know how or why I used magic, but I chose to hurt him with it. …no, let's face it, I tortured him with it. I can't believe I was capable of such a thing, but at the same time I can.
"Part of me didn't want to stop. Part of me truly wanted to kill him, and I wanted him to suffer before he died. I wanted to give him just a fraction of the pain I felt every day I spent with him. The pain all the humans in my life have given me…" Frisk's eyes were burning again, and this time she couldn't control her tears. One of Toriel's hands lifted to wipe it away, and Asgore started rubbing her back in soothing circles.
Both of them really were too kind… and Frisk didn't feel worthy of it, at all. Not after what she did. Whether her parents were humans or monsters, she just couldn't help but be a disappointment. Or a disgrace.
"I'm sorry… Mama, Papa, I'm sorry. I don't want to be bad, but I am. I'm so sorry!" Frisk wanted to hide the way she was supposed to whenever she cried (because ladies weren't supposed to cry in front of others), but the hands still holding hers wouldn't let go. In fact, Toriel gently cupped her head in the hand that had wiped away her tears, leaning Frisk to one side so her head rested on one of Toriel's shoulders. The former queen's voice was soft, and a little husky as she spoke.
"My child, you are not 'bad.' Perhaps you did wish to hurt your uncle… but whatever one part of you wished to do, I am certain all the rest wished for nothing but to protect us. That part of you is what won the fight. In the end you chose 'mercy', as you always have, even though that man showed you none in the past. I am so very, very proud of you, Frisk."
The princess sobbed a little bit. She was unaccustomed to hearing anyone say anything positive about her, much less expressing pride in her accomplishments. The wary little girl deep inside her, the one that was always waiting for the other shoe to drop, wondered if Toriel had meant anything she said. She knew her current mother had no reason to lie, but she couldn't help the feeling of suspicion.
Knowing she couldn't completely trust the people around her was what kept her alive on the surface. Though she liked most of the monsters she came across, that wariness remained. Muted, perhaps, because of how openly monsters expressed themselves, but it was still present. The fact that she couldn't bring herself to completely trust her new parents was yet more proof she didn't deserve their kindness… or their love, if that was what it was.
Frisk was quickly becoming inconsolable, her sobs taking her to the brink of hyperventilation. Asgore and Toriel looked at each other, only to find a mirror of one's alarm upon the other's face. There was only one thing they knew to do when a child's soul was in this much pain, but it was something they only ever attempted with their son. It would also require them to set all their differences aside, and to clear their own souls of the pain they had caused one another. None of their doubt, nor their self-loathing, could be anywhere near their thoughts…
Even after so long apart, they could read each other's expressions perfectly. Frisk's well-being was the most important thing, right now. They would do anything and everything that needed to be done, for her sake.
Toriel sat upon the bed, gathering Frisk into her arms and holding her tight. Asgore sat on the bed as well, but behind Frisk so he faced Toriel. There was only a fraction of a second's hesitation before he wrapped his arms around his former wife, hugging her and their daughter at the same time. They brought forth all the warmth they possessed in their souls to embrace Frisk not just physically, but also with the magic in their souls, reaching for the closed-off core inside Frisk's that contained all of her pain.
The princess could feel them. It was almost, but not quite like when Sans had judged her, with that bright yellow eye boring a hole almost all the way through her. She resisted them the same way she had back then, and tried to break free from her mother's arms. Toriel held her fast.
"Shhhh… We only wish to help, my child" said the former queen softly. "You need to calm down. If our words will not reach you, then let our SOULs speak for us."
Asgore's deep voice rumbled in his chest as he said, "Your mother is right, Frisk. Please, tell us where it truly hurts. Let us make it better. Let us help our sun to shine again."
They were both stopped by Frisk's inner defenses, but it was no longer the wall she erected between herself and other humans to keep them from hurting her feelings more than they already had. It wasn't even the relatively flimsy one Sans had run into, during her judgement. It had eroded into something like a cage, and her parents were trying to reach for her through the bars. Frisk's deepest hurts were still out of their reach, and unwilling to come any closer. There was still so much fear…
Asgore spoke again. "I apologize if we are scaring you, Pumpkin, but please understand that we only want what is best for you. That includes your emotional well-being. We are here for you, and we always will be."
One of the bars gave way, but only slightly. Frisk's voice was small and fragile as she said, "…pumpkin?"
Asgore smiled, though she couldn't see it. "Yes. Your eyes remind me of the big, orange pumpkins the humans would carve faces in for one of their holidays. At least, once they moved away from using turnips."
Toriel laughed. "You are right! They are that color. But personally, I would liken your eyes to the color of the sky at sunset. Or perhaps the tree leaves in autumn. Such a beautiful, unique color."
The bars gave way a little more as she felt their sincerity. Nobody ever said they liked the color of her eyes before… That and their narrow, "shifty-looking" shape had been why she started squinting so much, watching the world through her eyelashes. She was trying to make herself look harmless (or at least less "shifty"), and hiding their odd color, too. That had brought on its own teasing, of course…
But Asgore and Toriel weren't lying. Frisk could feel that they weren't lying. They didn't feel anything bad toward her, despite everything she'd done. They weren't trying to lure her into a false sense of security. They weren't pretending to care for the sake of "appearances." They just… cared.
The cage was too deeply ingrained for it to dissolve completely, but enough of the bars gave way that her parents could reach for Frisk's inner self. The lonely little girl that Frisk hid deep inside was truly comforted for the first time in a very long time.
Neither of the adults knew how long the three of them stayed that way, with Frisk bawling into Toriel's shoulder as Asgore hummed a soft lullaby that had never failed to calm their son. But Frisk's body and soul soon tired from the strain of her raw emotions.
Not all of Frisk's hurts had been healed, but Toriel and Asgore knew an important first step had been taken, the most difficult one. They hoped the rest would be easier for her.
Frisk's face was a mess as they laid her back on the bed. Toriel used a handkerchief to clean the worst of it as Asgore retrieved the magically cooled cloth that had been over Frisk's face to start with. It went back over her swollen, puffy eyes, and he reflected that Dr. Flat might not be very happy about that… Frisk's nose had also clogged because of the tears, making her sniffle even more, but there was no helping it.
She had bottled up her emotions, for whatever reason. She needed to release them, before they festered into more of what let her use her magic in the manner she had.
Once Frisk was fully settled back in bed, another knock came from the door. Asgore called for whoever it was to enter. Dr. Flat came into the room, bowing to her monarch and giving a cordial nod to her patient's mother. She gave Frisk a quick examination, noting how the redness in her eyes had backslid a little bit, and administered eyedrops to help with that. She made more notes on how effective the pain medicine had been, then asked to speak with the royals outside. After telling Frisk they would see her in a moment, they followed the doctor out of the room.
Cutting to the chase, Dr. Flat said, "I find it interesting that the pain medicine was so effective. I assumed her physicality would absorb most of it without any effect, so I based the dose on her weight. However… that is more than what skeleton of her size and magic density would need. Only slightly, but still more than necessary."
Toriel pondered for a moment before saying, "Well… Perhaps it is not so surprising. She can eat alchemically-produced food with no problems or complaints. Her appetite is quite healthy, too."
Dr. Flat became thoughtful. Slowly, she said, "That… just might explain how her magic is being distributed the way it is. She's biting into the food, swallowing it, and as what little physicality it has reaches her stomach, the magic is absorbed into her bones along the way. Perhaps even her SOUL, as well. But that would only explain the upper half, not the one spot on her foot…" Several seconds of silence became a minute, then two before she shook herself out of her thoughts. "In any case, if Her Highness keeps improving the way she has, she can go home by tonight." With a raised brow, she added, "Provided she gets the rest she needs."
Asgore and Toriel got the hint. The doctor took her leave and they went back into Frisk's room. The princess turned her face toward them, but kept the cloth on her face.
"The doctor had good news!" said the king cheerfully. "She says you can come home tonight, once you've rested a while longer." Even while Frisk smiled a tiny smile at the news, Toriel cleared her throat softly and looked straight at him.
"Of course, we must decide which home Frisk will be returning to," she said. Asgore's smile fell. He should have seen this coming…
Frisk's voice came firmly from the bed. "Mother, don't start." A bit startled by her tone, the adults looked back down at her. She had one eye uncovered, no longer squinting. She was directing a mild pout toward the general area of Toriel's face as she continued. "None of this was Father's fault. By choosing to hurt my uncle, I wound up hurting myself. Besides, you two had an agreement. You can't renege on it this soon, without a real reason to do so. I'm going home with Father, as I'm supposed to."
The princess' tone and gaze gentled as she said, "Mother, I know you're worried, but Father and the guards will protect me. I just… need to let them do so, I guess." *Instead of trying to take matters into my own hands, she added to herself. Granted, Papyrus was alive because she had, but did she really made things better? She didn't know. She just didn't want her parents to fight.
Frisk remembered listening to her human parents fight. It always made her feel so small and worthless to hear them arguing over her. Even though they hadn't loved her, they'd often fought over having to raise her, anyway. How much money her nannies, clothing and education cost them. How all the time they could have spent on themselves was instead spent with her, to "keep up appearances". They didn't even spend THAT much time with her! Still, there was always something to argue about…
Her voice was tiny, and without realizing it she said, "Please don't fight…" Even if Toriel and Asgore were fighting for different reasons, just feeling the tension between them was bringing all those old memories back.
It seemed like it was just that kind of day, where echoes from the past kept reminding her of how broken she was.
Asgore knelt beside the bed, bringing his eyes down to her level as he stroked the top of her head in a soothing manner. He looked into her uncovered eye and said, "There, there… We are not fighting, Pumpkin. Your mother simply raised a valid point, seeing as how we share custody."
"But it's not valid," said Frisk. "You both already agreed on where I'll be living this week."
"You are correct, my child," Toriel said as she patted Frisk's knee. "I let my concern cloud my judgement. I am sorry if that upset you."
After thinking for a moment, Frisk softly said, "It wasn't so much that as… old memories."
"I still apologize, dear one. And… I apologize to you, as well, Mr. Dreemurr." Asgore jumped a little in surprise, looking up at her with wide eyes as she continued. "Frisk was also correct in saying that you are not to blame for all that transpired today. None of this was your doing, yet my emotions got the better of me and made you into one of the villains of this day. I am sorry." She inclined her head in a small bow
"Tori…" Asgore seemed off-balance, but then shook himself. "I-I mean Miss Toriel, there is no need for an apology, although I accept the one you have given. I blame myself, as well, for I allowed Frisk to wander the Underground with only the one bodyguard for protection. Under normal circumstances that would have been more than enough, but today has proven to be quite… irregular. But remember what Sans said; it was a fluke of Fate that brought the one man who would do the greatest harm to Frisk here. Thankfully, further tragedy was prevented because she and Papyrus acted as they did."
Before anything more could be said, there was yet another knock on the door. This time, Papyrus came in, holding a vase.
"GOOD NEWS, PRINCESS!" said the skeleton with a big smile. "UNDYNE BROUGHT FLOWEY HERE, LIKE I ASKED!" He held up the vase full of flowers, and the two royals couldn't help but stare at him with confused expressions.
"Is that my vase from the Ruins?" asked Toriel. Papyrus answered in the affirmative.
"Is that a golden flower in there?" asked Asgore.
Papyrus nodded, but then said, "FLOWEY IS NO ORDINARY GOLDEN FLOWER, YOUR MAJESTY! FOR YOU SEE, HE CAN TALK!"
He held out the vase, giving Flowey a stage upon which to display his vocal prowess… but he remained silent. Even his face was being hidden as the silence stretch on.
Papyrus was becoming embarrassed. "…FLOWEY? ARE YOU ALRIGHT? THERE'S NO NEED TO BE SHY!"
Flowey must have decided to throw him a bone, because he faithfully mimicked Papyrus as he faintly echoed "there's no need to be shy!" Even as Papyrus gave his friend a very old-fashioned look, the royals still marveled at him.
Asgore left Frisk's side to get a closer look. "A golden echo flower! Goodness, will wonders never cease?" Flowey echoed him, making him laugh, which Flowey also echoed.
Toriel, however, was puzzled. "You said this flower is from the Ruins, my child?" When Frisk said yes, she became more perplexed. "That is odd… There is only one place where the golden flowers grow, down there, and none of them have ever echoed before now…"
Frisk, figuring Flowey must be uncomfortable with all the scrutiny from his parents, decided to rescue him. "He's special, Mother. That's why Papyrus and I went all the way down there to collect him. In fact, Papyrus, why don't you set him down on the little table, right here?" She vaguely waved to her left, indicating the small end table next to her bed. The guard obliged, and then left the room to resume his post after one last glance at Flowey.
Toriel sighed. She was puzzled by how her daughter and her friend addressed the flower as though it were a sentient being. And it also looked a great deal like the terrible creature that had been torturing Frisk, when she first arrived… but there was no time to dwell upon it. "I must be going," she said. "I am sure there are people on the surface awaiting news of your condition. I must go and reassure them."
The king nodded. "Yes, I must go, as well. An official statement must be prepared, and I must consult with Earl Sharpe. The law is clear on what must be done when one dusts another, but things may have to be handled more delicately than normal, since this is the first human to commit crimes against us in a long time. He cannot be executed out-of-hand, now that we are no longer at war against humanity."
Frisk clutched at her blankets. "Will I be in trouble, for hurting him?"
Asgore started patting her head, again. "No, no! Do not worry yourself, Pumpkin. You did nothing wrong. Miss Toriel was right; you were protecting your friends and yourself from harm, no matter what else you did." Frisk didn't look very reassured, but she nodded, anyway. The princess was tucked in, then the royals left the room to let her rest, dimming the lights as they did. Outside her door, they spoke softly to one another.
"Is she truly without blame?" asked Toriel. "According to Sans, she started a true Fight, trapping her uncle in a proper field. She was clearly acting as the aggressor, though how she figured out how to start a Fight is more than baffling… I certainly never taught her how to do so!"
"I do not know," said the king. "Perhaps she was responding to some deep-seated instinct? It makes me wonder if Sans was correct in thinking that Frisk was once capable of magic, then lost the ability for an unknown reason."
Toriel frowned thoughtfully. "She must have been very, very small when she could still use it. Too small to be taught these things."
Asgored nodded. "It is a puzzlement. But Frisk is a highly intelligent youngster. Perhaps she figured it out simply by journeying through the Underground?"
"Perhaps…" Toriel seemed unsure, and Asgore almost placed a hand on her shoulder to offer comfort, but stopped himself just in time. After feeling her soul next to his for the first time in ages, he had almost forgotten all the pain he had caused her, and the pain her absence had caused him. He was fairly confident his touch would be unwelcome, now that they weren't trying to comfort Frisk. He withdrew his hand and hoped she didn't notice.
"In any case," he said briskly, "I am sure everything will be made clear, in time. For now, all we must do is be there for Frisk. It is clear to me that she has been alone for a very long time. Perhaps she will reveal more about herself once she feels more secure in our love for her."
Toriel finally nodded. "I agree." She saddened as she said, "Her soul… it felt like such a small child's. It is no wonder she 'slips' so much in her language, and keeps regressing in demeanor." Her expression hardened. "She has never stated they did so, but my suspicions that Frisk's parents mistreated her keep moving closer and closer to validation."
Asgore nodded, his expression grim. "Mine, as well. However, we know Frisk's human parents are already gone. We can do nothing about the past. We must concentrate upon our future with our daughter."
Toriel nodded in agreement.
After her parents left the room, Frisk started her own quiet conversation.
"Was it necessary to make Papyrus look like a fool?"
Although her eyes remained covered, she could imagine Flowey revealing his face to roll his eyes. "Well excuse me, Princess, for wanting to stay incognito!" He huffed. "Look, I've learned that it's best if nobody knows I can really talk, okay? Especially those two. Papyrus only knows because he's always been a useful tool, even before you came into the picture."
"But Asriel, they're your parents…"
"Then it's a good thing I'm not Asriel! Even if I was, they don't deserve a son like me, not after everything I've done." He paused then said, almost against his will, "I can't love them, Frisk. I tried, but I just can't."
Frisk shook her head. "Flowey, if you can say they don't deserve a son like you, you love them. Even if you can't feel it, it's in there, somewhere."
Flowey sighed. "I still don't know if you're right, but I'm not going to argue. Something tells me I'd lose." Seriously, he became a freaking GOD, twice over, and she still beat him each time. Speaking of which… "Hey, Frisk?"
"Yes?"
"Why didn't you use magic sooner? I mean, that first time we fought when I had the just the six souls, you used plenty."
"I did? When?"
"You seriously don't remember…?" Flowey leaned forward in the vase, toward Frisk. "It was when you kept hitting me and my HP depleted, before I loaded my file to undo it all? You were using all kinds of magic then!"
"I don't…" She knew what he was talking about, but… "I didn't realize that was magic. I was just… feeling."
Silence fell. Flowey eloquently summed up his confusion with a firmly stated, "Huh?"
"I don't know how else to explain it," said Frisk. "It's just… Did you know I was calling for help the whole time we were fighting?"
"No… Not that I noticed."
"Well, every now and again, you would stop moving. I'd go… somewhere else, and then I'd be able to call out to someone. All of the souls answered. They would even heal me with a little bit of magic. Each time they did it felt a little different, like each individual's magic was as unique as their soul. Once I had called out to all of them, and we started fighting in earnest I just… remembered those feelings. The way they helped me echoed within my heart, and I eventually triumphed… sort of."
More silence fell. Flowey was stunned, and Frisk was contemplative. She hadn't been thinking about her fight against Flowey very much, if at all. She hadn't forgotten, but she tried not to remember if she could help it. Given how many times he had torn her to shreds with vines, or had those toothy, thorn-covered balls swallow her, or blew her up, or…
Frisk forced herself to focus on something else. She wondered if that had been what the back of her mind meant by "remember." She wondered if she could still use those particular abilities… but she was under doctor's orders to not use any magic. It would have to be an experiment for another day, if she decided to conduct it at all.
Today had been different. Fighting her uncle had been very different from fighting Flowey. The feelings, in particular were hotter, and their jagged edges had grated on her soul. They came from the part of her deep inside that resented the way she had been treated by him and others, and wanted to strike back. It was that same part of her which let her deliberately plan setting her uncle's property on fire, long before she ever reached the mountain that had always loomed in the background of her life.
"I don't know if I can use those abilities again," said Frisk, "but I do know one thing. 'Determination,' is proving itself to be even more than I thought it was."
Frisk reached up behind her head, fluffing up her pillow before laying her head back upon it. After making herself comfortable she asked Flowey, "Can you tell me how you gained your powers?"
