Thank you all for supporting me through this journey. I've loved all of the comments! I've read every single one. Shout-out to angelcarstairs4670 and Absence and Clarity for constantly writing to me. Your comments and support have gotten me through this project and I'm so thankful for your kind words.
Well, here's the last chapter!
Happy reading!
Chapter 17
The doctor moved the stethoscope down Tobio's bare chest, the boy shivering slightly at the cold. Akaashi kept his hand on Tobio's back, rubbing soft circles over his shoulder blades.
They had been at the hospital for a full 18 hours, Akaashi groggy from sleeping on the hospital bed for a few hours. His neck was a little stiff and his eyes were incredibly sore from crying, but he felt that it was worth it. Tobio was finally calm enough to relax, the boy himself getting some shuteye.
Bokuto and Kuroo left when Akaashi woke up after 2 hours of sleep, Bokuto promising he would be back sometime the following morning.
Although, with it being 6 in the morning, he doubted Bokuto would show up any time soon.
"Well, your lungs still sound a little cluttered with gunk," the doctor said, removing the stethoscope. "But your fever has gone down just in the few hours that you've been here."
Akaashi sat up on the hospital bed and helped Tobio put his tiny gown back on before covering him up with the blanket. The boy laid back down on the bed easily, his eyes looking heavy again. Tobio nuzzled into Akaashi's side, his hands finding his fish plushie and curling his arms around it.
"So, how long will he be here?" Akaashi asked the doctor after tucking Tobio in.
The doctor hummed and glanced down at the clipboard in his hand. It must have been Tobio's chart.
"At least until tomorrow. Maybe even one more day to make sure he doesn't get worse," the doctor said.
Akaashi frowned, reaching over to tuck Tobio's hair behind his ear. He closed his eyes at the contact and kept them closed, his chest slowly moving up and down.
"He's on the path to a full recovery, Akaashi-san, so you don't need to worry," the doctor said. "We're taking good care of him."
Akaashi nodded, remaining silent as he continued to stroke Tobio's hair. He had been terrified the day before, when he came barging into the hospital room. And then running out of his apartment like a fool, only to be chased down and had some sense talked into him.
He sighed, his hand beginning to shake on Tobio's head.
It was crazy to think how close Tobio came to being an orphan.
"If you'd like to go home and get some rest, we can watch over him for you," the doctor said.
Akaashi snapped his head up to stare at the doctor with a shocked expression, his jaw dropping.
"But what if he wakes up and realizes I'm not here?" Akaashi asked, a little frantically.
The doctor smiled and pointed to the machines next to Tobio's bed.
"I just gave him some more antibiotics. That'll knock him out for a while," the doctor said. "His little body is tuckered out from fighting the infection, too, so he's probably exhausted. Don't worry, Akaashi-san. He is in good hands."
Akaashi sat still on the hospital bed, staring down at Tobio's sleeping form. He sucked his bottom lip into his mouth and gnawed on it. The last thing he wanted was to leave Tobio alone.
"I… I don't know…"
"Hey, hey! What's going on?"
Akaashi turned his gaze to look at the door, seeing a freshly-showered Bokuto with stiff hair and a bright smile on his face. He was also carrying two steaming cups, one of them labeled "latte."
Akaashi could have fainted at the sight.
"Ah, hello there, Bokuto-san!" the doctor greeted, a kind smile on his face. "I'm trying to convince Akaashi-san to go home for some rest."
Bokuto whipped his head to the side, locking his eyes with Akaashi's.
"Have you not slept at all since you woke up yesterday?" Bokuto asked.
Akaashi rubbed the back of his neck shyly, his eyes slowly lowering to avoid Bokuto's concerned stare. He heard Bokuto let out a soft whine from his throat as he walked towards him. He handed him one of the steaming cups, Akaashi taking it with both hands. He took a few small sips, humming as the warm liquid traveled down his throat.
That hit the spot.
"Have you even eaten anything?" Bokuto asked.
Akaashi gulped down another sip, practically scorching his tongue, but he slumped back against the elevated hospital bed, feeling content.
"I've only seen him drink that coffee you got him just now, Bokuto-san," the doctor said. "He's only left the room to use the bathroom, which was probably only once or twice."
Bokuto snapped his eyes back to Akaashi, but Akaashi was so relieved to have coffee that he didn't really care anymore. It felt so warm.
"Akaashi, that's not healthy!" Bokuto said.
Akaashi quirked a brow at him, almost pouting as he rooted to the spot.
"What, so you're back to calling me 'Akaashi?' I thought you were calling me 'Keiji,'" Akaashi said, trying to steer Bokuto away from the conversation.
"You know I think your last name is fun to say! And I… wait a minute, don't change the subject!" Bokuto said, pouting.
Akaashi managed a small smile, knowing he had won. But Bokuto sighed and rubbed the back of his neck, looking somber.
"Seriously, though. You need to go home for a bit. At least take a shower and get some food in you," Bokuto said.
Akaashi's smile fell as he winced, once again moving his eyes away from Bokuto.
"But what about Tobio?" Akaashi asked. "If he wakes up and sees I'm not here, then… then he'll be upset." He paused, his hands tightening around his cup anxiously. "He could hate me."
"Don't even say things like that. You know Tobio could never hate you," Bokuto said, placing a sturdy hand on his shoulder. "C'mon, you. Even the doc is tryin' to get you outta here."
He pulled Akaashi from the bed, Akaashi stumbling to his feet and clutching his latte to his chest. He briefly glanced at Tobio behind him and studied his sleeping face. The boy seemed to be in a deep sleep…
"He'll be fine, Akaashi," Bokuto said. He lifted up his pinky, his face turning playful. "I promise."
Akaashi blinked at him, a deadpan expression on his face, and then he rolled his eyes and sighed softly.
"You're so childish," Akaashi said, lifting up his pinky to lock with Bokuto's. Bokuto beamed and shook Akaashi's hand with their pinkies locked.
"Maybe! But you put up with me!" Bokuto said, smiling victoriously.
Akaashi huffed in agreement, knowing full well that he puts up with Bokuto's nonsense on a regular basis. But, he still followed Bokuto out of the hospital room, giving one last glance back at Tobio before they headed down the hallway.
"Okay! So, you wanna make some food?" Bokuto asked as they entered Akaashi's apartment.
Akaashi shucked off his jacket and rolled his sore shoulders, the muscles feeling stiff and tight. He glanced up at Bokuto with tired eyes.
"I think I'll shower first," Akaashi said.
"Ah, okay. I'll look around your fridge to see what we can cook up for breakfast!" Bokuto said.
Akaashi hummed and nodded in response, slipping off his shoes. He watched Bokuto scurry into the kitchen like a child, shaking his head at his friend. He hoped Bokuto wouldn't burn his kitchen down. Maybe he should call Kuroo…
Akaashi sighed, remembering it was Sunday and Kuroo would most likely be sleeping like the dead at this hour.
Oh well, he thought as he turned the corner and headed down the hallway. He flicked on the light to the bathroom and then slid open the door, relief filling him as he thought of a nice, hot shower.
Before Akaashi could take a step inside, he froze. The feeling of relief flushed out of his system, a heavy weight sitting in his chest instead.
There were still mirror shards and pieces of his destroyed violin all over the bathroom floor.
The weight in his chest sat heavier as reality set in, making him feel cold. His shoulders began to tremble and his legs wobbled. He had come so close to dying. He was right on the edge, the tipping point, practically shaking hands with Death itself.
But…
"If you had never been born, Akaashi… Then… Then I wouldn't have met you."
"And I need you, Akaashi. I need you to be here for me, every day. I can't live without you. I don't want to live without you."
"I love you, Keiji. Please. Please, Don't leave me."
"Akaashi?"
Akaashi startled, flinching violently and turning his head to the side.
Bokuto was walking down the hall towards him, a confused look on his face.
"What's up? I thought you were going to—"
Bokuto stopped short when he came up next to Akaashi, his brows furrowing as his face softened into a look of understanding.
"Oh," Bokuto said. "We forgot to clean this up, huh?"
Akaashi reached across his body to rub his arm shyly, suddenly feeling the shame of his outrageous outburst the other day. He sighed and moved forward to get on his knees. He rolled up his sleeves and reached down towards one of the shards of the mirror, ready to pick it up.
"No!"
Bokuto suddenly lunged forward, grabbing Akaashi's wrist and tugging it back. Akaashi glanced up at Bokuto in shock, eyes wide.
"Those shards are sharp! You can't just use your hands!" Bokuto said. He glanced down at Akaashi's hand, his thumb gently pressing into Akaashi's palm. "Your hands are precious. You can't mess them up."
Akaashi frowned taking his hand back. He glanced down at the remains of his violin, the neck still intact with the strings frayed from the tuning pegs. He sighed at the sight, his hands feeling empty.
Bokuto, in the meantime, had run to the kitchen and grabbed a dustpan and a small broom. He was back in the bathroom in a flash, gently sweeping up the mess.
"It's not like it matters," Akaashi mumbled as Bokuto deposited the shards in the bathroom trashcan.
Bokuto froze at his words, the empty dustpan hanging above the trashcan. He blinked at Akaashi with wide, owlish eyes.
"What do you mean?" Bokuto asked, his shoulders slumping.
Akaashi grabbed the broken, mangled neck of the violin, cradling it in his hands.
"It's over," Akaashi said. "My performing career is done now."
Bokuto lowered the dustpan and broom to the floor, bracing himself on his thighs.
"You don't know that, Akaashi," Bokuto said.
"I do," Akaashi snapped, making Bokuto flinch. He winced at Bokuto's reaction and sighed, slumping his shoulders right along with Bokuto's. "I abandoned the audition. My violin is…"
Akaashi stopped short, his voice catching in his throat as a lump formed. He tried to swallow it down but the pain only made things worse, tears springing to his eyes.
"Akaashi…"
Bokuto's hand found his shoulder, gripping it and squeezing.
Akaashi swallowed and breathed deeply, finding his voice once again.
"I've worked… so hard for this… for twenty years," Akaashi choked out. He cleared his throat, swallowing the tears down. "And now it's… it's all gone. I won't get an opportunity like this again. I mean, it took five years for that spot to open up. Who knows how long it will be until the next opening."
Akaashi sighed, leaning backwards until his back rested against the doorframe. The remains of his violin sipped from his grasp and landed on the floor, making a cringe-worthy crunching sound. He finally felt the crushing weight of defeat slam against his shoulders, and he could not hold himself up anymore.
"My dream was taken from me again," Akaashi said softly.
Bokuto frowned, his body seeming smaller than before. It was quiet for a moment, the air incredibly thick as they sat together on the messy floor.
"You know… Maybe this could be a sign," Bokuto said softly.
Akaashi lolled his head to the side and furrowed his brows at him.
"What do you mean?" he asked.
"I mean, like… Maybe you should try to find a new dream," Bokuto said. "Something different, maybe."
Akaashi blinked at him, his chest growing cold. His brows furrowed, the audacity of Bokuto to even suggest such a thing made him furious.
"Are you saying I should give up my dream?" Akaashi snapped, his tone accusing and sharp.
Bokuto was unfazed by his voice, however, and he lifted his shoulder in a shrug.
"Maybe," Bokuto started gently as his shoulder fell in the shrug. "Or maybe it's just the universe telling you that the dreams you have for yourself are not what's best for you."
Akaashi's anger was doused immediately, and he sat back against the wall, slumping. Guilt ate away at him, making his body feel dense and heavy. He had to get his anger under control before he hurt the people he loved.
"Sorry," Akaashi apologized softly, lowering his head in shame.
Bokuto smiled and shook his head. "Don't apologize, 'Kaashi."
Akaashi shook his head, his shoulders rising to his ears as he tried to make himself as small as possible.
"No. I shouldn't take my anger out on you, Bokuto-san. You're trying to help me and I'm pushing you away," Akaashi said. He sighed, bending his knees and pulling them up to his chest. He rested his chin against his knees, hiding his mouth. "I'm just so… frustrated."
Bokuto scooted a little closer to him, his legs crossed in front of him with his hands gripping his ankles.
"What are you frustrated about, Akaashi?" Bokuto asked softly.
Akaashi chewed on his lip, staring at Bokuto's socked feet so he could avoid his calculating eyes. He sighed as the thoughts started to gather in his head, his answer ready on his tongue. He thought about keeping it all to himself, and staying silent. But when Akaashi peeked up at Bokuto's face, he could see the concern.
"Please don't leave me."
Akaashi held himself tighter, his heart fluttering. He owed so much to Bokuto. He could at least talk to him.
"I'm frustrated that… that my hard work has gone down the drain," Akaashi admitted. "I'm… angry. I'm angry that I spent so many years working towards something just for it to get thrown back into my face."
He could feel his heart start to race as he kept speaking. It was uncommon for Akaashi to speak his feelings. He wasn't Bokuto, who could easily spout off his words to anyone who listened. He didn't feel allowed to speak or feel, for much of his childhood he spent alone and without anyone to hear his needs.
Akaashi took a deep breath to relax his heart and he kept going, lifting up his head and bonking it back against the doorframe, his eyes trailing upward towards the ceiling. He needed to press forward, no matter how difficult it would be for him.
"For the longest time, I always felt that I was supposed to be something great," Akaashi began, images of his childhood coming to his mind in blurry bits and pieces. "I was never supposed to have an office job, or be that person in a cubicle. I was supposed to go out and be somebody. Make a name for myself."
He paused, his arms tightening their hold around his legs.
"I always felt like the main character. Like my story was supposed to be this… great adventure that people would talk about. With performing, I thought I would have all of that," Akaashi said, taking a moment to pause.
He frowned as he thought about the past five years and how everything just seemed to crumble before his very eyes.
"But now… everything feels… off," Akaashi said. "It's like I don't belong anywhere. I'm not even a person in the cubicle. I'm a background character."
Akaashi slumped and leaned his head down until his forehead touched the top of his knees. His back ached for sitting this way for so long and his shoulders felt so damn heavy, but he had to get it out. He had to tell someone what was going on inside his mind.
And besides, Bokuto deserved an explanation.
"It's all so heavy now," Akaashi said, his voice almost a whisper. "All of my motivation to continue on is just… gone. I'm so, so tired of doing this."
He inhaled sharply as the treacherous lump worked its way back into his throat. His eyes started to sting, as well, and he shut his eyes as the frustration only grew.
"Without performing, what am I?" Akaashi asked. "I feel like I'm nothing."
Arms wrapped around him, and Akaashi found himself being tugged into a broad chest. His eyes fluttered open, coming face-to-face with the familiar cotton shirt that Bokuto was wearing.
"You're not nothing, Akaashi," Bokuto said. "An object or skill doesn't make you you. You're worth much more than some violin."
Akaashi sniffed, his chest clenching painfully. "But who am I now? What am I supposed to be now that the only thing I had is gone?"
Bokuto pulled back and placed his hands on Akaashi's shoulders, staring at him with conviction and compassion on his eyes.
"You're Akaashi Keiji, the most fun, passionate, caring best friend a guy could ever have," Bokuto said. "And if you don't stop saying bad things about my best friend, I'll be real upset!"
Bokuto's face twisted into a pout. Akaashi blinked at him, the last of his tears squeezing from his eyes, and then he huffed out a laugh, reaching up to wipe his cheeks. Bokuto's façade cracked and he smiled along with Akaashi, his hands falling away from Akaashi's shoulders.
"Sorry. I'll try to stop the habit of saying self-deprecating things," Akaashi said.
Bokuto nodded once. "Good! Actually, maybe you should—" He stopped, his smile turning timid as he rubbed the back of his neck. "Maybe, uh… Do you think you should, um… talk to someone?"
Akaashi tilted his head, his eyes narrowing a little. "Talk to someone?"
Bokuto hesitated, his smile getting smaller and smaller.
"Yeah, like a… professional," Bokuto said carefully.
Akaashi hesitated, his hands coming together and fidgeting in his lap. He had never thought about going to speak to someone. Growing up, if Akaashi cried, his parents would just stare at him and tell him to stop. There was no hugging involved, no pats on the back or gentle shushing. Akaashi had to deal with his emotions all on his own, and eventually grew tired of trying to feel anything at all.
But now, Bokuto was telling him that it was okay to feel. It was okay to go talk to someone about how down he had been feeling.
"It's okay to go talk to someone, you know," Bokuto said suddenly, pulling Akaashi from his daze. "There are lots of people who do it."
Akaashi bit his lip, knowing Bokuto was right. He wasn't the only one who considered counseling. He knew that. But...
That means you're crazy.
Akaashi gasped, his hands coming up to cover his ears.
That voice had been silent for a whole day and now it chose to rear its ugly head back into his subconscious.
"Akaashi! What's wrong?" Bokuto asked, his hands coming to rest on Akaashi's shoulders.
Akaashi shivered at the touch, waiting for the voice to speak to him again. But when it stayed silent, he relaxed and allowed his hands to drop from his ears. He sighed and hung his head.
"Are you okay, Akaashi?" Bokuto asked, worry laced in his voice.
Akaashi rubbed his chest to comfort his heart and he nodded, feeling almost nauseous.
Bokuto still looked uncertain, but he kept his mouth closed. His hands were sturdy and grounding on Akaashi's shoulders, making his breathing easier and the nausea fade.
Akaashi shivered, sitting back up. He glanced at Bokuto with a wince on his face. Bokuto was right. Maybe he did need help.
"I... I think I do need help," Akaashi whispered.
Bokuto's brows rose a little in surprise, but he quickly nodded encouragingly.
"Okay. That's okay," Bokuto said. "I can help you find someone. Someone you can trust."
Akaashi fiddled with his fingers again, feeling shy as he tossed an idea around in his head.
"Would you... come with me?" Akaashi asked.
Bokuto's face twisted into surprise again, his brows climbing his forehead.
"M-Me? You want me to come with you?" Bokuto asked.
Akaashi nodded, feeling more confident in his decision now.
"I would feel more comfortable if you were with me," Akaashi said.
Bokuto only took one moment to be surprised before his face split with a cheerful smile.
"Of course, 'Kaashi!" Bokuto said. "You can count on me!"
Akaashi smiled, finally feeling more at ease. He slumped back against the doorframe and watched as Bokuto pulled out his phone to research local therapy centers, the mess in the bathroom forgotten.
"You're worth much more than some violin."
Akaashi's smile grew, and he turned to Bokuto.
"Thank you, Bokuto-san."
"Are you sure your chest doesn't hurt?"
"It feels fine now, Daddy."
"Okay. Well, if your cough gets bad, then you have to tell Suga-sensei."
"Daddy, my cough's been gone for a whole day!"
Akaashi sighed, knowing he was fretting too much. The doctor had cleared Tobio days ago to go back to school, but Akaashi had kept him home to make sure his lungs were completely clear and pain-free.
Tobio was itching to get back to school, which was a brand new thing for the boy. Just a few months ago, Akaashi had to drag his son out of bed to get to school. It was amazing how much had changed in such a short amount of time.
"Daddy, Shouyou is waiting!"
Akaashi blinked down at his son, the boy impatiently bouncing on his heels with a pout on his face. Akaashi sighed and nodded towards the classroom.
"All right. Get going. But be careful, okay?" Akaashi said.
"I will!" Tobio said, his eyes shining. He turned around and hurried into the classroom and bounded over to Shouyou, who let out an excited screech at seeing his friend.
Akaashi smiled at seeing the two of them rush over to the crafts table to start drawing. Tobio's eyes had been so bright lately, and his temper had cooled quite a bit. Akaashi made a mental note to thank Hinata-san one day. Shouyou was the best friend Tobio could ever have.
"Ah, Akaashi-san!"
Akaashi turned to see Suga approaching him with his shining smile. He stepped just outside the doorway and placed a hand on his hip. He cast a smile over his shoulder at Tobio and Shouyou.
"I see Tobio is back to his normal self," Suga said, turning his head back to smile at Akaashi.
"Mmn. He's doing much better," Akaashi said. "But could you keep an eye on him? He still might tire out easily."
"Of course!" Suga said, waving his hand in the air. "But I'm sure he'll be fine. I had complete faith that he would make a full recovery."
Akaashi smiled. "He's a stubborn one, so he wasn't going to let this keep him from playing volleyball."
"Ah, he's been brainwashed by Bokuto's talents, has he?" Suga asked, smirking.
"Yes," Akaashi said. "But it's not a bad thing to get into."
"Mmn, I'd agree with you!" Suga said. His eyes suddenly lit up and he snapped his fingers. "Oh! Before I forget, the class made 'get well' cards for Tobio. The kids were all pretty worried about him."
Suga pointed to Tobio's cubby in the corner, and Akaashi spotted the colorful drawings of hearts and smiles taped next to where his backpack hung on the hook. It made Akaashi's heart squeeze in his chest.
"Thank you for worrying about him," Akaashi said. "It's nice to have so many people that care about him."
"Mmn, yes. But Tobio wasn't necessarily the one I was really concerned about," Suga said, his smile turning a bit forlorn. "I was actually pretty concerned about you for a while."
Akaashi tilted his head at him, his brow arching in question. "Me?"
Suga nodded, folding his arms across his chest and leaning against the doorframe.
"You seemed really down from the first time we met," Suga explained, his hands tightening on his arms. "I was going to have a chat with you after that day Tobio yelled at you, but I saw you talking with Bokuto."
Suga smiled wider, his face cheery again.
"And then he convinced you to play volleyball with the rest of the guys, and you seemed to be getting better," Suga said. He looked up at Akaashi with a gentle expression. "I don't know, you just seemed a little sad. I wanted to talk to you, honest I did. But when Bokuto got ahold of you first, I thought I would hang back and watch to see how you would do. And it seems that things are better now."
Akaashi stared at Suga, stunned. This whole time, there had been someone else looking out for him without him even knowing? Who else had been watching him from a distance? Kuroo? Konoha?
"Sorry for prying," Suga said, putting up his hands when Akaashi didn't answer. "I hope I wasn't too invasive."
Akaashi blinked at him and then shook his head. "No. No, you're… you're fine."
"I see. So, are you doing better, then?" Suga asked.
Akaashi paused, taking stock of the last few months.
He quit his stable job.
He gave up his audition and destroyed his violin.
He came close to dying three times.
Akaashi winced, remembering how foolish he had been. He knew that hurt and pain could cause someone to make rash decisions. But he never thought he would be one of those people.
But, with all of the hurt and pain and suffering Akaashi had experienced the past few months…
"Akaashi! Set it to me!"
"That… That was amazing. It was… really beautiful, Akaashi."
"You can't call yourself a failure when you've got the greatest proof of success right before your eyes."
"Please don't leave me, Keiji."
"I love you, too, Daddy!"
…he also experienced some of the greatest days of his life.
"Yeah," Akaashi managed to answer, a smile growing on his face. "I'm doing a lot better."
Suga smiled so brightly that it was almost blinding. He hummed thoughtfully and nodded in approval.
"Good," Suga said. "Oh, right, I almost forgot. Didn't I hear that you auditioned for something recently?"
The reminder felt like a stab to the chest. But he tried to remember what Bokuto had told him.
"Or maybe it's just the universe telling you that the dreams you have for yourself are not what's best for you."
Akaashi swallowed. He had to keep an open mind if he wanted to recover and find a new dream for himself.
"It… It didn't really work out," Akaashi admitted.
"Oh. I'm so sorry," Suga apologized.
Akaashi shrugged. "It's all right," he said. He paused, chewing on the inside of his lip. "It… will be all right."
The correction made the sting in his chest more real, but Suga's look of understanding ebbed the pain into something more manageable.
"Not everything works out the way you want it," Suga said. "Sometimes we've gotta keep searching for that sweet spot, you know?"
"Sweet spot…" Akaashi echoed, mulling it over in his mind.
"Mmn. You might not find it right now, but be patient. It'll come with time," Suga said, smiling.
"I see," Akaashi said with a small smile. "Thank you for the advice."
Suga nodded, placing his hands on his hips.
"Well, I don't want to keep you. You and Bokuto have a meeting or something today, right?"
"Yeah, he should be waiting for me in the gym," Akaashi said.
"Ah, don't want to keep him waiting then!" Suga said. "He gets antsy when you make him wait."
Akaashi rolled his eyes. "I'm aware. Thank you, Sugawara-san."
"Mmn! See you later, Akaashi!"
Akaashi bowed his head politely to Suga and then turned around to head to the gym. The entire way there, Suga's words echoed in Akaashi's mind, mixing with Bokuto's advice from the week before.
They were all around the same age, so why do Bokuto and Suga sound like old men who have gone through tough times? Was Akaashi just that inexperienced?
"Oh, my! Akaashi-san, it's good to see you!"
Akaashi stopped to see the teacher who had recruited him to be a substitute a few months back. She was carrying a stack of papers that balanced carefully over a few textbooks in her arms.
"Oh, good morning," Akaashi greeted, dipping his head.
"I haven't seen you in a few days. Bokuto-san told me your son was sick. Is he feeling better?" she asked, adjusting her glasses with a nervous hand.
Akaashi nodded. "He's in class right now, actually."
"Oh, good, good!" she said, smiling. "Well, that's great to hear. I'm actually on my way to—"
Suddenly, all of the papers in her hands slid off of the textbooks and scattered onto the ground.
"Oh, shoot!" she exclaimed, quickly getting down on her knees to pick up the loose papers. "Sorry, I'm such a klutz!"
Akaashi knelt down with her and started to collect the papers, his eyes scanning each page. One particular paper made him pause, his eyes widening at its contents.
EMPLOYMENT OPPORTUNITY: ORCHESTRA DIRECTOR/TEACHER
Fukurodani High is looking for a qualified, capable, and talented teacher to fill the role of Orchestra director…
Akaashi looked up from the paper, his brows furrowing a bit.
"You still haven't found someone to fill in the orchestra teacher job?" Akaashi asked, handing her the paper.
The teacher looked at the paper and frowned, putting it on the top of the stack of papers.
"Unfortunately, no," she said, standing to her feet. Akaashi followed, his eyes locked onto the paper on the top of the stack. "We've called other schools to see if they have any recommendations, but we are just short on music teachers."
Akaashi bit his lip, his hands fidgeting by his sides. No one has really applied for the job, yet?
"…dreams aren't what's best for you."
"…that sweet spot…"
Akaashi swallowed, an idea popping into his head. His heart was pounding against his chest as he tossed it around over and over.
Could this be an opportunity?
Was the universe telling him something?
"Well, thank you for helping me pick all these up, Akaashi-san," she said, bowing her head. "I should get going! I'll talk to you later."
She took a few steps down the hall, her image getting smaller and smaller as she was getting further away, and Akaashi found himself taking a step forward and inhaling deeply.
"Um, excuse me!" Akaashi called.
The teacher stopped and turned around, the stack of papers wobbling dangerously. She blinked at him through her glasses, waiting for him to continue.
Akaashi swallowed.
This was it, then.
"Do… Do you have an application for that teaching job?" Akaashi asked, his voice a little subdued.
The teacher's eyes practically popped out of their sockets.
"O-Of course!" she said. "Just let me—"
The stack of papers nearly fell to the ground again, but her quick reflexes managed to save them from crashing down. She sorted through the papers until she pulled out a creased piece of paper and thrust it towards Akaashi.
"Here you go!" she said.
Akaashi took the application from her and bowed his head a little in thanks.
"Thank you," he said.
"No problem at all!" she said. "Um, just turn that in as soon as you possibly can so they can process it before the next school year starts."
"Sure," Akaashi said with a nod. "Thanks."
And with those words, the teacher bowed and left him standing in the hallway, his eyes staring at the piece of paper in his hands.
It was all right in front of him. His duties as teacher, his responsibilities, his objectives…
Should he fill this out? Become a teacher? Lead students to learn, play, and love music?
Instill a passion for music in the next generation?
"Akaashi?"
Akaashi startled and whipped around, seeing Bokuto coming down the hall with his hands cradling the back of his head.
"Hey, there you are," Bokuto said. "I've been waiting for ya!"
"Sorry," Akaashi said. "I got sidetracked."
"No problem! We'll get to Dr. Koji's office in no time," Bokuto said. "Speaking of, you ready to head down there for your first session?"
Akaashi nodded, folding up the application and tucking it into his pocket. Bokuto stared at the movement with curious eyes.
"What's that?" Bokuto asked, pointing to his pocket.
Akaashi took a deep breath. "It's… something I want to bring up at the appointment," Akaashi explained as they started to leave the school.
"Oh?" Bokuto said, eyes widening. "You're being proactive! Already bringing things to your first meeting!"
Akaashi tucked the application into his pocket, feeling a bit anxious that he had even taken the paper in the first place.
"Yeah," Akaashi said shakily.
"Is it something that'll help you talk to Dr. Koji?" Bokuto asked.
Akaashi nodded. "I think so…"
Bokuto smiled and threw an arm over Akaashi's shoulders, jostling him a little on the sidewalk.
"Good! Just take your time with things, okay?" Bokuto said. "And don't forget that I'm right here, too."
Akaashi sighed and rolled his eyes harmlessly.
"I could never forget that, Bokuto-san."
Several months later…
"First day, first day! First day of school!"
"Could you please stop singing that, Bokuto-san?"
"What? Can't a guy be excited for his best friend's brand new job?!"
"Bokuto-san…"
Bokuto smiled brightly, showing all of his teeth. They walked together down the sidewalk towards Fukurodani High, a spring in Bokuto's step. Akaashi would be lying if he said he wasn't a little jittery, too. It was a big day of firsts.
"Daddy, are we almost there?"
Akaashi glanced down at his son, all decked out in a new First-Grade uniform. His eyes were shining brightly, his hands gripping his backpack.
"Sorry, Tobio. We're almost to your elementary school," Akaashi said.
Tobio sighed, slumping his shoulders. "It's not fair. I want to go to Fa… Fo… Fukuro…dani High again. I wanna play volleyball."
"There will probably be a volleyball club at your elementary school, Tobio!" Bokuto said.
Tobio's eyes sparkled. "Really?!"
"Yep!" Bokuto said. "And even if you can't play at school, you can always come over and me and Kuroo will play with you!"
"Bokuto-san, just because we live in your apartment complex now does not mean you can steal Tobio away whenever you want," Akaashi said.
"Akaashi! How dare you accuse me of that!" Bokuto whined, a pout tugging on his lips.
Akaashi rolled his eyes, pointedly ignoring the hurt look on Bokuto's face.
"Then Shouyou can come over, too!" Tobio exclaimed.
Bokuto's pout vanished. "Of course, little man! Both of you guys can come over!"
"You're trying to give Kuroo-san a headache, aren't you?" Akaashi said in a deadpan voice.
Bokuto scratched his cheek. "Well… It wouldn't be on purpose."
Akaashi blinked at him before turning his head back to stare down the path.
"On second thought, maybe you should watch Tobio whenever you want," Akaashi said.
"Now who's the one giving Kuroo a headache?"
Akaashi smirked, giving Bokuto a cheeky look. And Bokuto smiled back, a knowing look on his face.
"Hey! I see Shouyou!"
Akaashi and Bokuto glanced forward and saw Tobio pointing towards a school gate just a few steps away. The redheaded ball of energy was waiting by the gate, a nervous look on his face. But once Shouyou locked eyes with Tobio, he lit up like the summer sun.
"Tobio!" Shouyou yelled, jumping high in the air and waving his arms.
Tobio's lips wobbled into a strange smile and he turned back to look at Akaashi, waiting for permission. Akaashi smiled and gestured for him to move forward.
"Go on. I'll pick you up this afternoon," Akaashi said.
Tobio nodded and scurried off, tearing off towards the gate.
Akaashi sighed, feeling something tugging at his heartstrings. He didn't even get to tell him a proper goodbye.
Akaashi winced, his hand coming up to grip his shirt.
Calm down, Akaashi told himself. Dr. Koji told you not to overthink these things.
Just focus on the positives: Tobio has a friend. That's a positive. He also trusts his school and isn't afraid. That's good, right?
It was fine. Akaashi didn't need a goodbye hug or a kiss from Tobio.
Everything was going to be just—
"Oof!"
A small body suddenly collided into Akaashi's legs, jostling him slightly.
He glanced down next to him and saw Tobio clinging to his body, his eyes shut tight.
"Tobio?" Akaashi called, a little concerned.
"I love you, Daddy!"
Akaashi's breath hitched, the heartstrings snapping as he was filled with an overwhelming amount of joy. He knelt down to the ground and squeezed Tobio in his arms, planting a kiss on Tobio's head.
"I love you, too," Akaashi said. He pulled back and looked at Tobio, moving his bangs out of his face. "See you this afternoon, okay?"
Tobio nodded and then called out over his shoulder as he ran to the school gate, "Bye, Daddy! Bye, Bokuto-san!"
"See ya, kiddo!" Bokuto called, waving wildly at the boy.
Akaashi waved back, his chest feeling pleasantly warm.
He loves me, Akaashi thought.
He would never grow tired of hearing that.
"Akaaaashi, let's goo," Bokuto said, pulling Akaashi along. "We're gonna be late!"
"Ah, I'm coming," Akaashi said.
They walked a few more blocks until they reached Fukurodani High School and entered the front gates. They went down the familiar hallways until they reached the gym, both of them stopping just outside the double doors.
"Well, here's where I leave you," Bokuto said. "Unless you want me to escort you down to class."
Akaashi put up a hand. "That won't be necessary, Bokuto-san. I can handle it."
Bokuto smiled and nodded, placing his hands on his hips.
"I know you can," Bokuto said.
He reached forward and pulled Akaashi into a tight hug, his hands gripping his shirt. Akaashi was a little stunned but he quickly recovered so he could return the hug.
"I'm proud of you, Akaashi," Bokuto said. "You're gonna do great."
Akaashi felt his eyes start to water and he squeezed them shut to prevent any tears from leaking out. He squeezed Bokuto back, almost unwilling to let go.
"Thank you, Bokuto-san."
After another moment in the hug, they parted, both with smiles on their faces. Bokuto gave Akaashi a firm slap on the back as he walked into the gym.
"Go get 'em, Akaashi!" Bokuto yelled as he disappeared behind the gym door.
Akaashi took a moment to breathe in the silent hallway, his heart fluttering like a nervous butterfly. He flattened his palm on his chest to calm it, taking one deep breath.
Music.
Once the butterflies settled a little, he huffed out air and turned to leave, quickly hurrying down the hallway towards the music room.
A universal language. A conversation without words.
He could hear some light chatter from the morning classes as he walked by the different rooms.
A bow pulled across a string, the light tapping of a drum, the warm, rich sound of the French horn, all coming together to create one sound.
With each passing doorway, his heart grew faster and faster.
He could feel the music in his feet. In his body. In his chest…
He finally made it to the last door on the hallway, and the teacher who had recruited him was standing there waiting for him.
In his heart.
"Oh! Akaashi-san! Just on time!" she greeted, a smile on her face. "Are you ready to be introduced to your students, mister director-san?"
Akaashi took another deep breath and looked at the door. His name was etched into a plate on the door, just below the words "Orchestra Room."
"Yes," Akaashi said. "I think so."
"Good," she said. "Let's head on in, then."
She slid open the door and led Akaashi inside. Inside the familiar room—the very same room that Akaashi practiced in—sat several students, all with instruments in their hands. They looked on curiously as Akaashi entered the room, their young faces full of energy and innocence.
"Good morning, class!" the teacher greeted, and the class greeted back politely. "I'd like to introduce to you your new music teacher. This is Akaashi-san, and he will be your orchestra director starting today."
"Oh! We got an orchestra director?!" one student piped up excitedly.
"I thought no one applied for the job!" another said.
"Now, now. Yes, that was true, but Akaashi-san here is an excellent candidate for the job," she said, giving Akaashi a gentle smile. "I'll leave you to it, Akaashi-san."
"Thank you," Akaashi said, bowing politely to her.
After the teacher left the room, it was just Akaashi and the room full of students staring back at him. His heart was bursting into overdrive, but he thought back to his own performing days.
Deep breath in. Feeling the music in your feet. Universal language.
"Um, Akaashi-san?"
Akaashi glanced over at a girl who had a flute sitting in her lap. Her hand was raised and she had a determined expression on her face.
"Oh, uh. Yes?" Akaashi said.
The girl put her hand down. "So, since you're our new orchestra director… Do you have a piece that you want us to work on first?"
Akaashi paused for a moment, his brain going back to when he started planning the first concert of the year.
Right. He had a plan.
And he knew exactly which piece he wanted to conduct.
Akaashi smiled.
"Yes, I do," Akaashi said. He moved to the conductor's box and stepped up onto it, standing tall in front of the room full of musicians. "I'd like to try working on a symphony."
"Oh, a symphony?!"
"Beethoven? Mozart?"
"Yeah, which symphony, Akaashi-san?"
Akaashi's smiled grew as he picked up the baton. He glanced out at the students, his hands fiddling with the baton.
"I'd like to start with Tchaikovsky's 6th Symphony. The nickname: Pathétique."