The Kennel, March 1980…

'Happy birthday, Moony,' Sirius panted into Remus's neck, not bothering to disentangle their arms or legs as they fell, side by side, into the same pillow.

Remus laughed, still sweaty and high and delirious from post coital bliss. 'Happy birthday, indeed.' He kissed Sirius gently, again and again, just a light brush of lips.

'Mm, what does my Moony want for his special day, then?'

'Depends,' Remus answered cheekily, sliding a hand up Sirius's chest. 'What is Padfoot giving him? I bet he forgot until the last moment, what do you think?'

Sirius pouted. 'Have a little faith, Moony. I thought about it all month, and I still couldn't figure out what to get you.' He nudged Remus's cheek with his nose. 'Give me a little hint, Moony, come on. Or I'll have to ask Lily for advice, and you know how that always goes.'

'Think,' Remus said simply, kissing Sirius's nose.

'Can I bribe you with a big sloppy kiss?' Sirius asked, waggling his eyebrows suggestively and brushing a knuckle against Remus's chin.

Remus snorted. 'Don't be cheap.' He rubbed Sirius's stomach slowly, sensuously. 'How about another go?' He leaned in to kiss Sirius but was held back, much to his frustration.

Sirius didn't look any happier; in fact, he looked positively pained. 'We don't have enough time for that, Moony. I need to get to work in a few minutes, you know that.'

Remus sulked. 'Can't you just skip work for today? It's my birthday, you know…'

Sirius laughed. 'Somehow, I don't think Moody will accept the excuse. Things are getting busier at the DMLE.'

'I noticed,' Remus added a little spitefully. 'We hardly get to see each other as it is without you having to work overtime. I know we're both doing it to save the world and what not, but we could do with a little saving ourselves once in a while…'

Sirius stroked Remus's cheek, wiping away the creases under his eyes. 'We'll get rid of it someday. Look, we still have your birthday party to celebrate. Prongs is bringing streamers.'

Remus rolled his eyes. 'Is that a code word for things that will explode in my face?'

'Could be,' Sirius replied, grinning conspiratorially. 'And there's always after. That's when the real festivities start.'

'You'd better not be late,' Remus warned, his sour mood lifted and the playful glint back in his eyes. 'I'm in no mood for celibacy.'

'Moony, my love, I wouldn't miss it for the world.'

'Many happy returns. You look fucking hot.'

Remus looked away from the window and towards James who was standing beside him, a bottle of cheap whisky in hand. He raised an eyebrow. 'Excuse me?'

James grinned and shrugged. 'That's what Elf told me to tell you before he dragged Marlene into the bedroom.'

Remus groaned. 'That boy has absolutely no self control.'

James uncorked the bottle of whisky with his wand and handed it to him. 'You look like you could use this.' He watched as Remus took a swig before placing a friendly arm around the werewolf. 'Knut for your thoughts?'

Remus smiled. 'Not thinking. Just…reminiscing, I suppose.'

James looked at him incredulously. 'Moony, you sound like an old codger on your sixtieth birthday. Come on, you're a real man today – twenty and all!'

Remus laughed. 'That's the problem, isn't it? I mean, I feel like I never got the chance to be a boy to start with.'

'Merlin, you're depressed. It's because of Padfoot, isn't it? I'll kill him, you know. As soon as he shows his face in this house, I'll kill him.'

Remus shook his head. 'He has a reason. Padfoot wouldn't miss it otherwise.'

James huffed 'He doesn't seem to be in danger, so I really see no reason. Marauders always come first.'

'Things aren't that simple, and I don't really mind.' Remus smiled, wrapping his arm around James's shoulders. 'I really am enjoying the party. It's been a while since the whole gang has gotten together, hasn't it. I mean, I haven't seen Bones since Graduation. She's gotten quite fit, don't you think?'

James chuckled. 'You'd say that, wouldn't you? She's had a crush on you since fifth year.'

Remus's face turned beet red. 'Rubbish! She was dating Paul Scotts back in school!'

'Only because you were too involved with a certain dog to notice her! I bet you five galleons she's going to come over and ask you to dance tonight.'

'And I bet five galleons and the leftovers of my birthday cake that you're out of your mind.'

James clapped him on the back, emitting an embarrassingly high pitched war cry. 'Chocolate or not, that cake is mine, Lupin!'

'Forget it, Potter. That cake has my name on it…in white icing.' Remus crossed his arms smugly.

James's smirk didn't falter as he looked past Remus's shoulders. 'Prepare to lose, Moony, my lad, because she's coming this way in one, two-'

'Remus?'

Remus turned to look at Bones behind him, dressed in a pretty red frock and looking extremely pink in the face. 'I was wondering if you'd like to dance. I've been trying to find a partner all night.' She shrugged shyly. 'Guess I stepped on too many feet, eh?'

Remus smiled kindly. 'I'm sure you'll do fine with me. But before we go, I have one question.' He looked at Bones first, then James, who was looking haughty at having being proved right and won a fee out of it. 'Do you think James is out of his mind?'

Bones laughed, a sweet, tinkling sound. 'Doesn't everyone?'

'You owe me five, Potter,' Remus said simply, winking at James and leaving him glaring at the two of them as they danced.

XxxxX

Wormtail!'

Peter froze, cursing himself for thinking he could slip past the DMLE so easily. Sirius worked here after all and was bound to catch him sooner or later. He hid the documents in his hand behind his back as he turned to face the black haired man. Sirius was leaning against the doorframe of his office, looking as cocky as ever and surveying Peter in a way that made Peter more jittery than usual.

'H-Hello, Padfoot,' Peter said shakily and tried to put on his best innocent smile.

'Come in, Wormtail. I haven't seen you in a while, so don't think you can get away too easily,' Sirius replied gruffly, and Peter's limbs shook, as he walked in, with the fear of Sirius knowing.

Sirius sat down, offering Peter a cup of tea before pouring himself some. 'Where have you been, Wormtail? I haven't seen you since the last Order meeting and when I do see you today, you're trying to sneak out without visiting. You're not hiding something, are you?' He said all this with a grin, but Peter felt that Sirius's tone sounded a lot more suspicious than playful.

'I-I've been a bit busy with work. That's what I c-came here for today and I was in so much of a hurry. I s-should be going now, really, so-'

'Sit down, Wormtail,' Sirius scolded, rolling his eyes. 'You can tell your boss there was a long line or something. Lily's been asking a lot about you and it's driving me crazy, honestly. So, you're going to talk and spend a little time with me, like the old times, yeah?'

'I g-guess I could spare a little time,' Peter replied, willing himself to calm down. He wished he wouldn't stutter so much; it was only Sirius – Peter had spent seven years in school with him after all. He just wished the boy wasn't so unpredictable.

'Damn straight. So, what is this work that you were in such a hurry for?'

'Oh, you know, couple of approval s-stamps and such. What are all these papers for?' Peter asked, trying to change the subject lest he said something he'd regret later.

'What, these? End of the day paperwork of our activities,' Sirius replied disdainfully. 'Not like there's much to report nowadays with Moody increasing our security. He's started to divide one task between seven to eight Aurors so that no one knows what the main mission is. The old codger reckons there are Death Eaters infiltrating the Department.'

Peter swallowed his tea so fast that he scalded his tounge. 'D-Death Eaters? In the Department?'

Sirius sighed, stacking the scattered papers on his desk. 'Knowing Moody and his paranoia, he probably thinks they're everywhere, even in the Order.'

'The O-Order? You don't actually believe that, do you?' Peter asked, his heart hammering in his rib cage so loudly he was sure Sirius could hear it.

Sirius shrugged. 'Moody's as barmy as you can get, you know what I mean, but he's never been wrong.' He looked intently at Peter, furrowing his eyebrows and Peter trembled, knowing he was caught. He was caught and he wanted to run, run away as fast as he could before they arrested him. 'Say, you're coming to Moony's birthday party tonight, aren't you? I'm not forgiving you if you miss it. We've been planning it for nearly a week now and Lily's gone through the trouble of baking a large cake.'

Peter nearly cried in relief. 'Of course! I'd never think of missing it. Patricia has picked out a lovely present for him.'

Sirius wrinkled his nose in distaste. 'You're still seeing that bird then.'

Technically, Peter wasn't seeing her as much as he was assisting her. He'd been trying to get her into the Order in the guise of his girlfriend for a few months now, but Dumbledore kept turning him down. Apparently, Dumbledore hadn't known her well enough in Hogwarts and needed some time to consider the matter. 'Yeah, she's really great, you know; if you just give her a chance.'

Sirius waved him off as if what he said was irrelevant. 'Psh, it's not like you're marrying her or the like. She seems evil to me. I wouldn't even be surprised if she turned out to be a Death Eater.'

Peter was glad he'd finished his tea because he would have choked on it this time. He had to do something, he knew; he had to be sneaky and careful like the Dark Lord had told them to be. He had to do everything in his power to not get caught because his friends would never forgive him and even worse, the Dark Lord would kill him.

Peter tried to gather his courage and think quickly. 'I don't think so. Everyone's got a dark side, Sirius, not just Patricia. I-I mean, if you're judging in that way, anyone could be a Death Eater. Elphias, Shaklebolt, even M-Moony.'

Sirius laughed. 'My, you're getting defensive.'

'I'm just saying that everyone's got s-secrets. You can't tell me Remus t-tells you everything about his m-missions or even his personal life. I mean, if t-that's the case, then you wouldn't even know if he actually cared about you or was staying b-because you push so obsessively h-hard, right?'

Sirius frowned, the first traces of anger showing on his face and frightening Peter a little. 'Remus loves me and I've never pushed him into anything, least of all revealing his secrets. The Order's requires us to be covert, especially in jobs like Remus's.'

'E-Exactly!' Peter exclaimed, his voice going pitchy from the apprehension that came with what he was doing, what he was suggesting. Perhaps he should have never started; what if Sirius rounded on him; what if they all did? Things could get out of hand. 'That's the way with Patricia and me. I don't love her like you do Moony, obviously, because you come up to a level that's sometimes manic and dangerous.' Seeing the murderous look on Sirius's face, Peter hastened to correct himself the best way he could, 'It's in a good way. I m-mean to say that she can have as many s-secrets as she likes and I'd still t-trust her.'

'Wormtail, you're-'

Sirius was cut off by Moody's head popping into his office fireplace and growling his name urgently, 'Emergency, Black! Grab all the interns and report to my office in five minutes! It's going to be a long night…'

Peter got up abruptly, thankful to the heavens for the sudden interruption. 'I guess I'll j-just go,' he said quickly, not quite meeting Sirius's eyes. Sirius was too busy with his cloak and his wand to notice Peter's obvious discomfort. 'I'll see you t-tonight, Padfoot.'

XxxxX

Sirius closed the door behind him and tiptoed into the house. He shifted the small chocolate cupcake into his right hand and lit the candle with a flick of his wand. The house was a mess: there were balloons and streamers everywhere and a lot of their sticking charms were starting to wear off; there were bits of what suspiciously looked like chips littering the floor and all their furniture had been pushed to the side to create a large empty space in the living room as a (Sirius presumed) makeshift dance floor. The television was on annoyingly loud and the only furniture that had been put back into place was the couch in front of it. Coincidentally, Sirius also found his favourite werewolf fast asleep on top of it.

Sirius mustn't have been as quiet as he thought he was being because Remus opened his eyes blearily when he sat on the couch. 'You came?' he asked in a voice which suggested that Remus thought he was still dreaming.

'I'm a little late though, aren't I?' Sirius asked sheepishly. He offered the cupcake in his hand to Remus as a peace offering. 'It's chocolate.'

Remus huffed moodily, blowing out the candle in the process. 'Lily's had sprinkles…and cream…'

'Why aren't you in bed, Moony?' Sirius asked, gently pulling Remus's head into his lap. 'Were you waiting up for me?'

'Nu-uh,' Remus replied, burying his face into the warmth of Sirius's robes. 'Elphias had sex on our bed.'

Sirius chuckled softly. 'Camping on the sofa it is then. You're not upset, are you, Moony?' When Remus didn't reply, Sirius wound his fingers in Remus's honey brown hair, massaging and tugging gently. 'I tried to come, I really did, but you know how Moody is. I don't really blame him; things are getting really out of control.'

Sirius sighed heavily, taking a bite out of Remus's neglected birthday cupcake. 'I think I'm starting to believe Moody that there might be spies amongst us, you know. Do you remember we discussed about setting up protection for Liam Stille in one of the Order meetings? Dumbledore mentioned that Voldemort might be after him because he's sure to become Minister of Magic and he's damn good, too, isn't he?'

Remus snuffled, wrapping an arm around Sirius's waist. 'And we had a whole schedule set up, with different people on guard duty every night, except on Tuesdays because Stille spends all day in the office then and has enough people around him. We've been monitoring him for nearly two weeks now and nothing's happened, you know, despite Dumbledore going on and on about how much danger he was in.'

Sirius stopped stroking Remus's hair, resting his hand atop of his lover's head instead. 'He got attacked today, exactly when our defences were down. The bloke steps out for some tea at the local café and immediately gets cornered. His wife and kids are dead, and he's barely scraped through. On a sodding wheelchair, he is; hardly fit enough to sit straight, forget standing for Minister.'

'Fuck!' Sirius whispered, leaning his head against the sofa. 'Things are getting too complicated with this war. I don't want to think any of the Order members are spies, Moony; they're our friends. But no one else knew about this mission, you know. Do you reckon there is any muggle surveillance stuff in the Headquarters? You know, cameras and such things? It would make sense, too, wouldn't it?'

It was when Sirius didn't get an answer for his enormous tirade that he finally looked at his lover. Remus was fast asleep, head comfortably settled in Sirius's lap and legs sprawled all over the sofa and spilling outside.

Sirius smiled, finding Remus alluring even when he was snoring like a foghorn. 'Fine listener you are.' He rolled his eyes when Remus made a soft, displeased noise at the back of his throat as if sensing Sirius's half hearted reprimand. ''Night, birthday boy.'

XxxxX

April came and passed too quickly for anyone to notice. Sirius's workload was slowly piling up to an extent that was ridiculous for even an auror, nonetheless an intern. There were weekend shifts, missions from the Order, and even more missions from the DMLE. Some nights, he didn't even come home, camping out at the Ministry and returning at dawn for a bit of breakfast and a pinch of Remus.

Security in England had been tightened due to Moody's paranoia spreading across the Ministry, curfew had been shifted to eight instead of ten at night, and talks of Crouch becoming the new Minister were spreading. As if there weren't enough things to worry about, the Marauders personal lives and dreams were quickly fraying and falling apart.

James's parents had been attacked in the Potter Manor after Mr. Potter had published a paper on muggle-born rights. Luckily, both James and Lily had been visiting during the attack and while none of them escaped unscathed, they were all alive and the baby had been unhurt. James's dad, however, suffered permanent spell injuries that the healers said had to be avoided from happening again if he intended to live any longer. It was the second time James and Lily had defied Voldemort.

Remus, on the other hand, looked worse for the wear. He was constantly tired after his missions and rapidly losing hope on the werewolf population. Dumbledore had doubled the Order's efforts to recruit dark creatures into their side, now spreading to the vampires as well. Remus was the advocate for a majority of these missions and every time, he arrived a little too late and returned home with a defeated stance and the sick feeling in his stomach that only came from another failure. Curling up against Sirius and making love to him helped sometimes, but with both of them doing work for others, they rarely ever had time for themselves.

This time apart, however, only made their need for each other stronger, and they would cling to each other on the weekends spending every moment they had together and with their friends. Unfortunately, their time apart also had its downfalls; Sirius's insecurities regarding Remus's love for him were building, making him mull over Peter's words over and over again in his head until he would catch and scold himself for thinking things so stupid. Since when did he listen to Wormtail anyway?

I mean, if t-that's the case, then you wouldn't even know if he actually cared about you or was staying b-because you push so obsessively h-hard, right?

Remus loved him. Sirius knew that, even if they never told each other often. Sirius knew it, yet he doubted it. He doubted the love of the one person who'd give up his life for him. Sirius Black, epitome of overconfidence, doubted Remus. It was ridiculous.

I don't love her like you do Moony, obviously, because you come up to a level that's sometimes manic and dangerous.

Sirius did not push. He did not. He was not obsessive and he was not manic. Being prepared to die for Remus did not justify anything that Peter said. Sirius would die as readily as for any of his friends, and he'd proved that countless times. He didn't know what Peter was insinuating with comments like that because Remus loved him – loves him – and would always be free to leave if he wanted to. Sirius hoped he wouldn't though; he'd go mad without his werewolf by his side.

Sirius turned on his side to face the sleeping figure of Remus, eyelids fluttering from the dream he was probably having. He reached out a trembling hand, gently tracing the curves of Remus's face, his eyes, his nose, the bow of his lip, and the softness of his cheek.

'Moony?'

Sirius carded his fingers through Remus's hair. 'Moony?' He bit his lip, hesitating, before shaking Remus by the shoulder. 'Remus?'

Remus whined, turning his back to Sirius and pulling the sheets closer.

'Remus?'

'WhatisitPa'foo'?' Remus mumbled unintelligibly.

Sirius wrapped an arm around Remus, pulling him closer and burying his face into the nape of his neck. 'Remus, I love you.' He kissed the smooth skin of Remus's neck softly, lovingly, putting everything he felt – tenderness, devotion, even his insecurities - into that one gesture.

Remus groaned. 'Haf a wank, Pa'foo. 'M tired. Meetin' Dum'dore tomorr-ow.'

'That's not what I-' Sirius spluttered, appalled and embarrassed and indignant all at once. 'I wasn't trying to…I just wanted to tell you-'

Remus turned on his back to glare at Sirius with half closed eyes. 'Youwokemeup…'

'Yeah,' Sirius replied, suddenly feeling incredibly stupid. He stroked Remus's jaw, pausing to cup it. 'Say it back.'

Remus's look got sterner. He checked the bedside alarm clock and huffed. 'Youmental.'

'Tell me!' Sirius cried, his hand clutching Remus's tightly, and his voice taking an unwanted desperate edge to it. He slapped himself mentally at the look of shock on Remus's face.

You wouldn't even know if he actually cared about you or was staying b-because you push so obsessively h-hard.

'Sirius, I love you, okay?' Remus answered shakily, now completely awake. He let go of Sirius's hand to rub his eyes. 'What's wrong with you? Did you have a nightmare or something?'

Sirius lay back on his pillows, feeling utterly empty and lost. 'Or something.' He snickered as if he'd just made a joke and Sirius was sure Remus was looking at him like he'd gone crazy. 'Moony, you know,' he swallowed, looking at Remus in the eyes now, 'you know that I love you, right, but if you ever wanted to let go…'

Remus rolled his eyes. 'Oh for the love of Merlin, Padfoot, if you wanted to break up with me, you could have at least had the decency to wait till the morning, after I'd had some breakfast in me!' Remus moved closer to Sirius, moulding himself into Sirius's side and resting his head on his shoulder. 'Now I'm awake and single.'

Sirius laughed, a little relieved for reasons he really didn't know. 'I love you.'

Remus closed his eyes and snuggled deeper. 'I'm still not having sex with you.'

Sirius smiled, adjusting slightly so that Remus's arms could wrap comfortably around him. 'Moony?'

'Hm?'

'Just so you know, I wouldn't die without you,' Sirius lied to himself and Remus as if he needed to prove something. As if he needed to know that Peter was wrong.

'Mm, I would, and I'd kill anyone who tried to take you away from me,' Remus replied serious and unhesitant, a note of finality in his voice. 'Now, sleep,' he finished, his usual tone of sarcasm and amusement back so quick that Sirius was sure he'd imagined Remus's previous statement.

The unsettling feeling of something being horribly wrong lessened that night, but never went away.

XxxxX

Sirius was having a spectacularly good day.

He was whistling, and singing, and dancing, and prancing, and twirling in a pink apron he'd gotten free with the self raising flour, and basically acting very much like Julie Andrews from the Sound of Music. He was, in less polite words, being a complete ponce. It was justified, he thought, not because he was having a weekend off after a very long time; not because Remus was coming home from Dumbledore's soon; not even because his Godchild was due next month. No, Sirius thought it was justified because he really was, by nature, a complete and utter ponce and needed to connect with his inner ponciness once in a while for health purposes.

To celebrate this occasion of ponciness, however, Sirius decided learning to bake cookies for Lily and his Godchild from the Cooking for Housewives show would be a lovely idea. Lily was at a current stage where everything irritated her, made her grouchy, annoyed, hungry, and demanding. It was not as if she wasn't all those in normal circumstances, but she usually never had any upcoming babies to blame as she did now. Of course, nothing soothed such moods better than pure, unadulterated sugar which Sirius was had poured a packet full of in his mixing bowl.

These cookies were going to be the best ever; Sirius decided as he put the tray in the oven and turned the heat up. As a pure bred Black, he was naturally fantastic in potions, so by principle, he was to be fantastic at baking as well. Also, he thought proudly, he was dashing and manly enough to carry off a pink apron; something James could never do and would irritate him grandly.

Sirius smiled, brushing his hands on his trousers and leaning against the window. It was a good day for a weekend. The streets weren't too crowded, but there were just enough people to add life into their dreary little neighbourhood. The sun was shining brightly, complemented with a soft breeze that made leaves quiver ever so slightly and whistled through the cracks on the walls. It was a lovely day for a walk and perhaps Sirius would be able to persuade Remus to accompany him to the park before they went over to James and Lily's.

Speaking of the devil, Sirius could see Remus coming down the walkway, arms full of groceries. He grinned as bright as the sun and quickly changed into Padfoot, bounding down the stairs in his fastest speed. He was running so fast towards Remus that he was in danger of tripping over his limbs in excitement.

Padfoot barked.

'Hello, my pup,' Remus greeted, shifting his carrier bags to the other hand so that he could pet Padfoot. 'You're very excited today, aren't you?' Padfoot's tail wagged like a windmill, back and forth, fuelled by his joy of seeing Remus.

Remus, his little brain supplied, smelled nice. Earth. Man. Love. Chocolate. And oh, he had treats inside the bag and he smelled happy, but he was worried. Why worry? Padfoot wondered. We should play.

Padfoot heard Remus laughing when he chased his tail. It sounded nice.

'Come here, love, come on,' Remus beckoned with his hand. They were nice hands: smooth and creamy and sweet, so Padfoot licked them affectionately. 'It's been ages since we've gone on a walk, hasn't it, and its such good weather today. Would you like that? Would you like to go out for a romp and play fetch somewhere.'

Padfoot's tail went out of control.

'Good boy,' Remus said and Sirius lolled his tounge out in joy. He was a good boy! Remus thought he was good! And then, Remus scratched his underbelly and oh, oh, Padfoot was in sheer, doggy bliss. He lay down on his back, legs spiraling and making pleased noises as Remus indulged in him.

Padfoot loved Remus. Remus's hands stopped and Padfoot loved Remus a little less. It was very displeasing.

'Come on then, you big mutt,' Remus said, chuckling and getting up from his knees. 'We'll drop off these groceries and come out again.'

Padfoot gently took one of the bags between his teeth, careful not to rip it. He could smell the food inside, along with minty toothpaste and spicy cologne. He trotted beside Remus obediently, hoping Remus would think he was a good dog and pet him again.

'Merlin,' Remus cried out suddenly, sounding very worried and stopping in front of their building. 'One of the flats is on fire. I do hope it's not poor old Mrs. Wicket. She's always overcooking things.'

Padfoot picked up his ears and sure enough, he could hear the faint sound of alarm bells ringing within the building. It wasn't very loud because it was old and overused from the number of false alarms that came with Mrs. Wicket's burnt fish and exploding cakes. No one in the building seemed to be taking it seriously either, staying in their flats, despite the various cries from people outside.

Padfoot looked up at the window where the curtains were aflame, his nose picking up the scent of burnt sugar. He looked at Remus questioningly, but Remus didn't seem to be paying any attention to him. Instead, he was looking up at their burning building and counting. It seemed an odd thing to do so Padfoot nudged him insistently with his snout. He whined when Remus still didn't look at him.

Padfoot's felt very upset and looked at Remus with wide, teary eyes.

'FUCKING HELL!' Remus screamed suddenly, startling Padfoot and making him drop the grocery bag between his teeth. 'THAT'S OUR FLAT!'

A part of Padfoot felt something very wrong about the situation, wondering if it was his fault. The other part wondered when Remus would play fetch with him.

'PADFOOT, I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU DID, BUT HAVE IT KNOWN THAT I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!'

Padfoot's tail fell. An old lady passing by glared at Remus and muttered something about cruelty towards animals and mental people blaming their problems on their dogs.

'FUCK! WHERE ARE THE DAMN FIREMEN WHEN YOU NEED THEM?'

Two hours later, Padfoot and Remus were standing in front of James's and Lily's new cottage, a few salvaged bags full of their things in each hand (or mouth if you considered Padfoot).

Remus had been very angry, still was in fact, and had demanded to see Sirius right at that moment. Sirius had only come out long enough to babble incoherently about sorry's, and cookies, and I love you's; but when Remus had started scolding him, Sirius had gone again and left Padfoot to be a bad dog. Padfoot didn't like being a bad dog.

In the end, Padfoot decided Remus was not as nice as he smelled. He whined pitifully when Remus refused to acknowledge him and rang the doorbell instead. Lily looked cheerful when the door opened and Padfoot's spirits lifted slightly. He looked up hopefully at her, hoping she would pet him and make him a good dog again.

'This is all your fault,' Remus grouched, inviting himself in and leaving Padfoot to follow, tail between his legs and ears flat on his head.

Remus was mean.

XxxxX

James, Sirius, Remus, and Frank Longbottom stood at the entrance to the shop, flabbergastered and speechless, just one step close to having their mouths hanging open.

Remus cleared his throat. 'So…'

Frank groaned. 'You know, when our wives sent us out for this, I thought it was going to be the easiest fucking thing on the planet.' A woman pushing a pram glared at Frank for his use of language.

'Look at all these things. I'll never know what to get!' James picked up something incredibly strap-y that neither of them could name. 'What is this? Is this even important?

Sirius and Remus shrugged. 'Maybe we should just stick to the clothing and toiletries,' Remus suggested thoughtfully. 'Couple of shirts, powder, and shampoo: stuff we use, I suppose.'

'If we use them, why can't our kids just share?' Frank asked, looking exasperated. He picked up a box of baby wipes and glared at it angrily. 'Why does my kid need something jasmine scented to wipe its bum with?'

James sighed. 'Those two are having fun at the baby shower with all those gifts while we're stuck in here.' He dumped baby diapers into his shopping cart. 'I bet it was a ploy to get us out.'

'As if we wanted to be there,' Sirius snorted. 'I just wanted a beer and some television, but the two of you had to drag me and Moony into this mess.'

Frank clapped Moony on the back apologetically. 'Mate, you are so lucky you and Sirius are not having kids.'

'And still we get stuck with the daddies and mummies,' Remus grouched, dumping Merlin knows what into James's cart. 'Padfoot, we need new friends.'

'Hey!' James cried, offended. 'We're still up for the beer! It's not like we've completely lost it!'

Sirius and Remus burst out laughing, unconsciously leaning against each other a little too close and stopping only when the four of them received an angry glare from the shopkeeper.

'It's only a matter of time until the two of you get hitched with a couple of mad women as well,' Frank scowled.

Sirius, Remus, and James barely controlled their laughter. 'It's not going to happen anytime soon, I assure you,' James chuckled.

'Hm,' Frank pondered over a rack of Madam Malkin's Little Robes for Little Wizards. 'It's been a while since you've dated, hasn't it, Sirius. I mean, I understand Remus's problem, but you were quite the ladies' man back in Hogwarts. What happened?'

Sirius grinned. 'Lost interest, I suppose.'

James made a choking noise and had to distract himself with bottles of Magical Mess Removers to hide his red face. Remus patted him on his back a little too hard.

Frank snorted. 'Alice reckons it's because you're in love.'

James looked like he was going to have a hernia. Sirius didn't pay any attention to him and simply smirked. 'Why would she say that?'

'Ah, you know women,' Frank said offhandedly, rolling his eyes and dumping a large unknown item into his cart. 'They have all these ridiculous notions of love and romance. There's a little fairytale spun out of gold for every bloke in the city.'

Sirius smiled at Remus knowingly and shook his head. 'Women.'

'Meadows has been head over heels for you, you know. Apparently, she's been practically flinging herself at you.'

Sirius's eyebrows rose in shock. 'Really? I hadn't noticed.' He looked at Remus questioningly, who looked back at him with an equally surprised expression.

'That's what I told her, too!' Frank exclaimed, nearly hitting James in the face. 'I told her we blokes are a bit dense when it comes to these things, so it's really a lot easier if someone just came and told it to our face or just kissed us.'

Sirius draped an arm round Remus's shoulders. 'Couldn't have said it better myself.'

'Alice refuses to listen, of course. So, she and Lily cooked up this pyjama party story about you keeping a dirty little secret in your bed.'

'Wait, Lily's on this as well?' James asked blinking, before bursting out into manic laughter again. 'Merlin, I love that woman!'

Frank looked at James as if he was crazy. 'So anyway, like all lovely stories, you're supposedly besotted to some hot little brunette with all the right curves in all the right places and a brain to accompany it.'

Remus spluttered, looking extremely offended. 'Curves!'

'I know! Tits and brains are the most impossible combination! Remember Felicia Sport?'

Remus looked ready for murder. 'Tits! I'll kill Lily,' he muttered under his breath, unconsciously smoothing a hand over his chest. 'Tits, indeed.'

Sirius grinned and his hand fell away from Remus's shoulders, accidently brushing his bum. 'I wouldn't say it's an impossible combination, Frank, but very rare and very fuckable.'

Remus blushed red, looking sideways in an attempt to change the subject. 'Do you think Lily needs these cummerbund things? I wonder what they're for anyway…'

'So,' James said, panting from laughing so hard. 'If this bird's so great, why's Sirius hiding her? I'd show her off, wouldn't I?' He looked at Sirius and winked.

Frank shrugged. 'Ask Alice. She'll probably come up with another tale about the girl being a vampire or something.'

Remus sniffed grumpily. 'Vampires aren't even half as friendly. They're dead, and they smell, and they're always angry.'

Sirius grinned, patting Remus's head affectionately and letting his hand linger for a while. 'Change the story to a werewolf, won't you, Frank. Moony's not too fond of the vampires; they give him indigestion.'

'Sure, werewolf, dragon, hinkypunk, whatever works for you, mate. Hey, look, they even have little toy wands!' Frank read the instructions behind the box. 'Anyway, point is, Alice has gone completely mental and she's taking me down with her.'

Sirius leaned closer to Remus, brushing their shoulders and fingers together lightly. 'She's a smart woman, Frank. I say, cut her a bit of slack and let her have some fun. What do you say, Moony?' he said, breathing against Remus's cheek.

Remus kicked James on the shin moodily. 'I say she needs to pay attention to details.'

XxxxX

Remus sighed heavily, looking through the third of the many muggle papers. They'd been living with James and Lily for over a month now and still hadn't been able to find an appropriate flat either because it was too small, too big, too pricey, too far away, and so on and so forth. Sirius could see him getting agitated and laid a comforting hand over Remus's in hope of soothing some of his anger away. Remus had been angry for a very long time now. Not because Sirius had burnt their flat and gotten them kicked out; Remus could never stay angry with Sirius for very long; but there were other things that was pressurising him. Things that mostly involved the war, the missions, and Sirius knew that Remus constantly worried about both.

Sirius looked at James and Lily who were making breakfast at the counter, wondering if they could see the frustration in Remus as well as he did. Lily was an incredibly perceptive woman, but sometimes looked past the simplest of emotions in an attempt to look deeper and overanalyse situations.

'I think we should go for the last one we visited,' Remus said softly, hands threading through his bed hair. 'It had a nice balcony and there's a park a few blocks away from it that Padfoot would love.'

Sirius brought Remus's hand to his lips. 'I like living here, Moony, and you're trying too hard. You need to take a break.'

Remus smiled. 'I will. Dumbledore said there might not be any werewolf missions this month. Word's spreading about my arrival and he reckons Voldemort might try to stop me.'

Sirius's grip on Remus's hand tightened. His jaw twitched slightly, but he resisted the urge to go screaming bloody murder into Dumbledore's office. He was about to say something when Lily slipped two plates of soldiers and eggs in front of them.

'I hope you're not looking through the papers for another flat again, Remus,' Lily warned, slipping into the seat beside Sirius.

Remus shrugged. 'I don't want to impose for much longer.'

'Psh,' James said, sitting beside Lily and sipping his tea. 'It's great having you guys here. It's like the old Hogwarts days again.'

'Mm,' Lily nodded. 'Besides, I've never had people helping around the house before.' She glared at James pointedly.

'Yes, these few days of surrendering to your every need, buying ice cream at three in the morning, painting the baby room each time you changed your mind about the colour, and carrying all your heavy shopping bags have been the highlight of our lives,' Sirius commented sarcastically.

James grinned. 'Saved me a lot of trouble.'

'I still think the baby room should be yellow,' Lily said, scrunching up her face. 'Pink is so…sexist!'

'But, Lily, baby girls need pink rooms!' James whined, flinging a piece of bread at Remus's head by mistake.

Remus snorted and wiped his face. 'And you're worried about your room being sexist.'

'I'm not painting that place again!' Sirius scowled, sending another piece of egg flying across to Remus's head. 'My arm's still sore from the last time. Besides, the colour goes nicely with the crib.'

Remus wiped his face again with a napkin.

'But the cupboard doesn't match at all!' Lily argued so vehemently that her eggs flew off her fork as well and landed with flourish, yet again, on Remus.

'You know, this food flinging thing is really not nice,' Remus commented, cleaning his face again and sure that no one was really paying attention to him.

'I heard Alice Longbottom gave birth to a son at two in the morning,' Sirius said, 'you think him and our little girl could end up playmates?'

'I heard they named him something awful,' James said, making a face. 'Nendell or something.'

'Neville, James,' Lily corrected.

'Whatever. Our little Harriet's too good for him. She's going to be the Quidditch star of the century, you just wait and watch. She's going to be the youngest player to make it to the World Cup.'

Sirius made a face. 'You're calling her Harriet? It sounds a bit wussy, doesn't it?'

'It's my dead grandmother's name,' Lily replied angrily.

Sirius and Remus coughed. 'Harriet is lovely name, Lily,' Remus said, smiling weakly.

'James wanted to call her Quaffle,' Lily said defiantly.

James blushed red. 'I did not! I wanted to call her Blaze, like fire!'

'Like that's so much better!'

'I think it's rather fetching,' Sirius commented and withered as soon as Lily shot him a glare. 'Of course, Harriet is a very lady like name. Very dignified, I'm sure.'

'My grandmother was-' Lily stopped, her face taking a horrified expression and her fork falling from her hands.

'Lily, honey, are you alright?'

Lily looked down and went as bright red as her hair. 'I think the baby might be coming.'

XxxxX

'Okay, Lily, smile for the camera!' Peter squealed excitedly, aiming Remus's camera in front of a very red faced, very angry Lily Potter.

'Are you joking?' Lily screamed while simultaneously trying to push. 'Tell me he's joking!'

'Mrs. Potter, you need to calm down and concentrate,' the Mediwitch said gently. They'd long forgotten her name in the excitement of the baby finally coming after nine long months.

'I'M CALM!!' Lily screamed, grabbing the Mediwitch by the scruff of her shirt and shaking her violently. 'CAN'T YOU SEE? I'M CALM!!'

Remus didn't think Lily seemed very calm. It was a given really, considering that the tiny hospital room was crowded by all four, very excited, and hyperactive Marauders, a flustered Mediwitch, a very peeved Healer, and a woman in so much pain, she seemed like she was dying.

'I think I see the head!' James cried, practically jumping on the balls of his feet. James had been excited and anxious since the morning to the point where his face was as red and sweaty as Lily's. All the other Marauders followed him to go see the first glimpse of their Godchild and niece respectively.

'UP! UP WHERE MY HEAD IS! ALL OF YOU!' Lily screamed, breathing heavily. Her hair had come out of her bun and her eyes were wild, making her look very much like a mad woman.

The Marauders scrambled to the head of the bed, wary of Lily's wrath and not looking forward to angering her any further.

'Just a couple more, Mrs. Potter, and we're done,' the Healer assured, as Lily screamed murder from pain and frustration. There were tears pooling at the corner of her eyes, and James, in a moment of complete love and devotion for her, wiped them away gently.

'You can do it, Lily-flower!!' Sirius cheered.

'Remus, tell your mutt to shut up right now before I KILL HIM!'

Remus spluttered, looking around anxiously at the Healer and the Mediwitch to see if they'd caught the meaning behind her words. Luckily, they seemed unaffected by Lily's temper tantrum and were focusing hard on simply getting the baby out. Remus looked at Sirius who had momentarily frozen as well, but seemed to recover when Remus smiled softly at him. Sirius grinned cheekily and winked.

'Congratulations on your first child, Mr. and Mrs. Potter,' the Healer said, holding a very loud and dirty baby up and smiling.

Everyone stared in awe, silence reigning over the hospital room for the first time except for Lily's laboured breathing. Finally, Sirius seemed to find the words to speak. 'Mate, Harriet's got a penis.' Remus made a choking noise that sounded half way through a laugh and an attempt to retch.

James did a shining impression of a fish and used the hospital bed stand as support. He looked about to faint as he watched the Mediwitch clean and wrap up a very pink Harriet and his very un-girly parts.

'I told you the walls should have been yellow.'

XxxxX

Remus woke up at five in the morning to the sounds of the baby crying yet again. He felt Sirius groan loudly and bury his face into Remus's arm.

Come on, Padfoot,' Remus sighed dejectedly, 'it's our turn to feed Harry.' He nudged Sirius gently with his elbow.

'I don' haf breasts,' Sirius mumbled into Remus's skin. 'Go ask Lily.'

Remus rolled his eyes, pushing Sirius away to sit up. 'There's milk in the fridge. Come on, Padfoot, we promised Prongs and Lily we'd help out.'

Sirius looked about to cry. Neither of them had gotten much sleep for the past few days. 'That kid is some sort of spawn from hell,' he sobbed. 'What is wrong with him? Is he broken? Did those pink walls finally vapourise his brain?'

Remus yawned and scratched his back idly. 'Just summon the milk and let's get over with this.'

Both of them walked to the baby room, still a lovely baby pink with stars painted on the ceiling. Harry was crying noisily, wailing and flailing; his eyes were scrunched up tight and his face red. Karma had come and bit James back in the arse and his young son was now dressed in a white baby pyjama set with pink flowers and snitches on them. They were, by far, the oddest pair of clothing Harry had to date; this was including the sick green bobble hat Petunia had gifted Lily on her baby shower.

'Is he supposed to cry this much?' Remus asked, warming the milk and testing it on his hand.

Sirius picked Harry up, rocking him gently to soothe him. 'Merlin knows. I didn't really care for Regulus much when he was born. Kreacher took care of both of us mostly.'

Remus hade a disgusted face and handed Sirius the bottle. 'You poor sods.'

Sirius shrugged, tilting the bottle further as Harry drank hungrily. 'Regulus grew quite attached to him, I'll never know why. I hated that elf to bits, but then again, old Reg was always a bit of a softie as a child.'

Remus hummed, not sure what to say to Sirius's sudden bout of nostalgia; Sirius's family was a sensitive topic and rarely ever talked about among them.

Sirius handed Harry to Remus who took over the duty of rocking him and patting his back gently until he let out a little burp.

'Cute little bugger when he's quiet, isn't he?' Sirius smiled, resting his head upon Remus's shoulder once it was empty and Harry had been put to bed again.

'Horrible hair; like a tiny version of James,' Remus commented, carding his fingers through Sirius's own dark hair.

'I still love him. Does that sound stupid to you, Moony?' Sirius asked, turning to look at Remus. 'That I hardly know this little person, but I already love him silly?'

Remus shook his head. 'He's adorable, even after he's shat on all of us and vomited at least twice on my best robes.'

Sirius let out a little puff of air, making Remus's hair flutter. He wrapped both arms around Remus in a prolonged hug and rested his cheek against the side of his lover's hair. 'We can never have that, you know. I know it sounds ridiculous, but I've never wanted a kid until now.'

Remus closed his eyes, unconsciously swaying their bodies.

'I'm so tired of living through James and Lily,' Sirius said quietly, as if it was something forbidden. 'Didn't you ever want a sprog of your own, Moony?'

Remus shrugged, feeling his throat closing up. 'I couldn't do that to a child; not with my lycanthropy. It's too…' he trailed off, unable to say anything more.

'I asked you if you wanted one, not if it was morally allowed.'

Remus looked at Harry through the corner of his eyes, black hair standing at odd ends and his tiny chest rising and falling softly. 'My dad gave up his whole life to have me. I think…I think there might be something to it…'

Sirius laughed bitterly. 'Yeah, maybe, but we're only still boys, aren't we? Little boys trying to be little men: getting married, having kids; neither of us is really ready for anything that's thrown at us. I caught James tearing up yesterday because he thought there was something wrong with Harry.'

Remus moved closer to Sirius, trying to disappear into the warmth of his skin. 'James is an only child. So, he's a little scared, is all.'

'Isn't everyone, of one thing or another?' Sirius kissed behind Remus's ear softly. 'I know you are. You're trying to hide it, but I can see it in your eyes all the time. What are you scared of, Moony?'

Remus tried to move away from Sirius but was held tightly.

'Why won't you tell me? Don't you trust me?' Sirius tucked Remus's hair behind his ears, caressing his cheeks and pulling up his chin so that their eyes met. 'Don't you love me?'

Remus's amber eyes bored into Sirius. 'I'm not scared, Padfoot; I'm terrified.' His hand ran up Sirius's back, drawing circles at the nape of his neck. 'I'm terrified of losing.' You, Prongs, Lily, Harry, Wormtail, my mother, my aunt, so many, so many…

Sirius caught Remus's lips in a gentle kiss, holding him close and cupping his cheeks lovingly. 'Me, too,' he whispered as they parted.

XxxxX

Happy Christmas everybody! So, first of all, I'd like to thank all of you who reviewed and helped me reach my 1000 mark, especially all of you who have taken the trouble to comment on every single chapter and have always stayed with me. It was just plain overwhelming how a little idea could turn into such a big thing really and none of it would have happened without you guys. Secondly, I'd like to tell everyone that this is the official end of canon. The story's not over yet, but things are going to take a very AU turn from next chapter onwards. I have a bit of it planned out, so I'm hoping it'll work out well and happy in the end. Again, thank you so much for reviewing and don't forget to leave one towards the end and tell me how you liked this chapter and how I can improve on my work! I didn't really reread it, so feel free to point out any mistakes if any. Now for those who didn't leave e-mails:

Melissa: Thank you, love! I hope this chapter didn't disappoint and you enjoyed it just as much. A Person: Thank you. I tried to blend in a little bit of cute in this one as well while trying to put up important hints about the war and the ahem…coming chapters. Melannen Halfelven: Thank you!! I hope you found this chapter just as great. I had fun writing it, especially the part with Frank in it. :) Evil Platapus: The collar should have come earlier. I realised I didn't have one in my story and couldn't resist. Hehe. Yourmomistoolazytologin: Lol. Yeah, you gotta love Sirius's craziness. Kills you every time, so I put in a little bit here as well with the Padfoot and the cookies. Kyshal: Thank you! I like showing Peter's change sort of gradually I suppose so I'm glad it's working. If you're the sort to enjoy torture and angst, you're really in for a treat in the coming chapters.