A/N: I am so happy that people have finally decided to review! Thank you so much to vtcullen and Krystlebelle ( who made an account just so she could review! ) for your reviews! And to everyone else, please,please,please,please,please,please,review!!!! And a very special thanks to Luthien Flicker who has been encouraging this story from the start! - MissMei92
The night was starry and dark at the same time. It's so beautiful; to be able to watch the stars without the lights of the city around for once. I fingered my dress uncomfortably. Earlier in the day, I'd taken one of my older frocks and altered it considerably. It now looked less high-class, and more plain and shabby-like. I'd let my flowing black tresses down tonight. When I'd caught a glimpse of my mirror reflection, I'd been shocked. I looked completely different from the usual. I looked more like me. I fought down the urge to run back to my cabin and bury my face in the pillows. I gulped nervously and summoned up all the courage possible and walked into that loud and noisy hall as if it was the most natural thing in the world. The first thing to catch my attention was the music; it was loud, vibrant and celebrating. All my fears and worries slipped away and I relaxed.
None of the others thought I looked any different from them, and were doing exactly what I'd thought they'd do at one of these sort of parties. The drunk men were laughing rudely over lame jokes; the older wives were gossiping and arguing about society; the younger ones were more harried and were busy attending to their little babies; the couples were dancing, of course; the children were playing marbles and discussing dolls. I smiled to myself when I saw one of the boys playing marbles wasn't a boy at all; more of a girl wearing an over-sized cap, which she obsessively tucked lower onto her head. I stood offhandedly in a quieter corner and observed the happenings. It was different, yet familiar at the same time. Different, because here there were no inhibitions, no manners, no rules, no people to please. The same, because there was nothing special about high-class people which made them any better than lower-class people. They were all just people. I'd been humming the current tune being played when a eerily amazing voice startled my thoughts.
"Miss Suzette?" My heart skipped a beat. I must have died and gone to heaven; because at that instant I was looking into those ever devastatingly haunting golden eyes. I was staring at the face of an angel. It was him.
"Are you here alone, Miss?" I cursed myself for being so tongue-tied; but I'd never expected him to be here. This was surreal, and dared I believe it, fated. James Stoner was standing before me now, dressed like a lower-class gentleman and he still appeared as handsome as ever. I must have been a sight for sore eyes.
I finally found my voice and strangled it until it spoke."N-no. Uhh, I mean y-yes." Wonderful answer, Suzette. He must think that you're about as smart as a walrus. I blushed furiously, and bit my lower lip down hard.
"I see. What, pray tell, are you doing in the lower-class quarters at this time of night, then?" He was toying with me; I could see it in those liquid-sun eyes of his. He was more amused in talking to me than the actual answer. This made me bolder than I really was at that moment.
"Why? For the party, of course. What are you doing here?" I asked in, what I hoped, was the most steady voice I had.
He laughed and it sounded like an the echoes of a music box. Soft, yet enchanting. "Of course, I'm here for the party as well. How have you been since our little dance?" His eyes sparkled at this. It nearly made me faint; he'd remembered. He'd remembered me. I smiled as brightly as possible.
"Quite fine. Do you agree?" I lied expertly; I wasn't about to tell him that I was engaged to be married.
"Oh, yes. The same for me. I'm headed south, towards Italy. I'm visiting some old friends of mine." He chuckled. "Tell me, do you often dress up in lower-class clothes and loiter around their parties like this?" He joked light-heartedly.
"Do you?" I replied simply, indicating that I had more wit in me than the average high-bred female. Ladies are taught to answer every question they've been asked before they can even begin to ask their own; even then, they can't say much either. I was the total exception from this, though.
He looked even more amused by this. "No, but I thought I'd be adventurous tonight." He smiled a smile which made my knees weak as a newborn fawn. However, at this very moment, the ship lurched and I lost my balance, my feet twisting in a weird angle and pulling me to my knees.
"Suzette!" He'd disregarded the formalities. How cute. "Are you alright?" He was by my side, holding my arms in his strong grasp. I felt the same spark of electricity I'd felt before this, from when we'd danced. It was like a wave of warmth and cold surging through me and touching my heart. My heartbeat was quickening every second we lingered like this.
"I'm still in good shape. Don't worry," I said quickly, trying to remove myself from his embrace; this wasn't proper at all. He wouldn't let me.
"Perhaps we should go outside for awhile. This room is too crowded for my taste." He gently helped me up, placing my right arm around him and wrapping his left arm around my waist. I protested a bit.
"You really don't need to do this. I'm perfectly capable of walking." My cheeks were getting flushed. I could see the curious looks that everyone else was giving us. Embarrassment was an emotion I'd like to avoid. James paid them no attention at all. He only cared about me. And that thought was enough to make me flutter with happiness.
He helped me walk until we reached the upper deck area. I gripped the railing and gasped for breath. It wasn't that I was injured or anything like that; I was more of trying to regain my sanity before I completely lost it. James was still holding me around my waist. I could feel his hand rubbing my side gently. How improper, I'd thought. But unthinkingly, I didn't mind.
I turned my head to watch his face. He was staring upwards at the night sky; so engrossed in the stars that I'd thought he'd forgotten where he was. I was still studying his face when he suddenly caught my gaze. Surprised, I swiftly averted my eyes and concentrated on the nearest star I saw. I could feel him smiling at my reaction.
"Suzette, did you think that me meeting you was fate at work?" He asked abruptly. I looked back at him, taken aback. His eyes were sincere and I could see he was thinking very hard about something. I replied what came to my mind first.
"Yes, I think it was." I gazed intently into his eyes and I could see he was uneasy; he was fighting with himself over something. But I didn't what it was. He stared back with a strange look.
"Would you believe me...if...I...said...'I love you'?" His eyes lost the look I now recognized as being fear. He now looked resigned; as though he knew my answer. Or so he thought.
"Yes, I would." I answered back without any hesitance. Something I'd never felt before was stirring deep inside me. "Do you...do you...love...me?" I asked, my voice meek. He was silent so long that I'd felt like crumbling into dust and disappearing right then and there. I must have made a mistake; how could he love me?
"Yes, I love you, Suzette." His gaze fell downwards and I realized that he was waiting for me to reject him. How? How could I ever do that to him? I...I...loved him too. I reached up and touched his cold cheek.
"James, I love you too." It was unthinkable. Unheard of. We barely knew each other. And here we were, confessing love. I stroked his cheek lovingly and rested my head on his stone chest. He seemed to be completely still at first. I'd never felt like this before. So safe. So wanted. So loved. He gently tilted my head up,until I was facing him once again.
He slowly bent downwards, and pressed his icy lips onto mine, igniting my inner being by doing so. I kissed him back, with as much passion as he had, as much love as he had shown. I moved my hands to his neck and held him closer. His hands soothed my tense back. We were lovers, just as I had imagined in my daydreams.
We parted only when we had to breath once again; I smiled at him. I felt like I was in just another dream, impending reality nearly come to wake me up now; but the seconds passed and here we still were, together in each others embrace, unspoken words flowing between us. I never wanted the moment to end. I never wanted that night to end. We stood underneath the stars for so long; just happy to be with one another.
Eventually, we had to go back inside. The sea breeze was starting to chill me; and James was so cold, I feared that he was ill already from it. He took off his coat and placed around me, as we entered the hallways again. I didn't want to have to leave him; and then a disastrous thought entered my mind. He had no idea that I was engaged. Oh, dear Lord. What would I do? What could I say that wouldn't hurt him? Everything had taken place so quickly.
A voice inside me told me what I had to do. "If you really love him, you'd tell him the truth." I knew what I needed to do. He lead me back to my cabin and I made him promise me that tomorrow when the ship docked in France, he would be there waiting for me. He gave me his word. We kissed goodbye and I fell into my bed, sobbing. Half-because I was tortured over my decision of telling him; half-because I wanted to lie so I wouldn't lose this. The sun was already rising as I finally fell asleep.