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Show Announcer: This is Sports Centre, Animation Edition!!
(Theme song plays with the intro showing to our beloved sports fans!)
Sonny: Welcome to another episode of S.C.A.E. Today is a special episode with special appearance of Monkey D. Luffy!!
Kevin: That's right folks! Today's episode is dedicated to my G.F. and having the Top Ten of EVERYTHING…this means there are bloopers, traumas, and MUCH much more!!
Sonny: Let's start with the first annual name-guessing contest!! In the very first episode of S.C.A.E. who was the special guest (if there was one) is it:
A. Homer J. Simpson
B. Uzumaki Naruto
C. Nara Shikamaru or
D. None of the Above?
Stay tuned for the answer on the next episode of S.C.A.E.
Kevin: In today's sports news, in the Star Cup, Mario won first place with a modified racing cart while Rosalina finished in second and a close third between Donkey Kong and Toad. With the others lost in the race for the top prize, many died on the way to the finish line… Here is the list of names for those who are not with us anymore:
Diddy Kong
Princess Peach
Princess Daisy
Yoshi
Wario
Waluigi
Luigi
and many more names that were asked not to be listed.
Sonny: We will be back after these following messages with the Top Ten of EVERYTHING!!
Show Announcer: This episode of S.C: A.E. was brought to you by new Campbell's Chunky Tuna Soup "mM, mMM, BLEHHHHHH!!" (Vomiting noise) and by the new Honda Civic, "Drive slow!! Really slow!!"
Kevin: Welcome back sports fans, here comes LUFFY! Give it up!!
(Applause and cheers, as Luffy walks to the set. He takes a seat between Kevin and Sonny.)
Sonny: So Luffy, how is life searching for the long lost One Piece?
Luffy: Well, it is fun I guess!
Luffy's Nakama (or crew): (watching the TV) WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY "FUN"?! F--K YOU, YOU STUPID PIECE OF--
Kevin: About the One Piece, how long have you been searching for it??
Luffy: Let's say that it had been VERY long just trying to get there and get it…
Sonny: Okay then, how the crew why didn't come with you here on S.C: A.E.??
Luffy: They are kinda tied up at the moment…yeah. That's it, all tied up…
(Meanwhile, the Straw Hat Pirates crew are outside the studio...)
Luffy's Nakama: LET US IN, YOU F--KING BASTARDS! YOU F--KING SUCK!!
Kevin: Luffy, why not start off the Top Ten of EVERYTHING for us?
Luffy: Sure guys! The number ten of EVERYTHING is when good old Jiraiya peeked at the local hot springs of Konoha. Also, while Tsunade was actually in the hot springs…
Sonny & Kevin: Show the clip!!
(Clip shows the Ero-Sannin getting beaten to a pulp by the Fifth Hokage, Granny Tsunade…)
Ero-Sannin: WAIT I CAN EXPLAIN…AAAAAAHHHHHHHH!! (Runs fast) RUN EVERYONE!! OPEN UP THE GATES! (Tsunade catches up) AAAAAAAAAAHHHH, NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOO!!
(BEATING SOUNDS: "BOOM! PUNCH! KICK! SMASH!")
Sonny: That must've hurt A LOT even for a pervert, and here comes number nine of the Top Ten of EVERYTHING. Number nine is Happy Gilmore winning the AT&T Open, and Shooter McGavin getting beaten by the fans and crowds.
Kevin: Roll the film!
(Shooter just got beaten up!! Is that simple enough for you readers?!)
Sonny: We will be back after these commercials!
Show Announcer: This S.C.A.E. was brought to buy Subway, "Eat FLESH!!" and by Home Hardware, "Help is far away from home…"
Sonny: Welcome back and here's the number eight of the Top Ten, in the soccer finals between the ninja villages, teams Ramen (Konoha) and SandMen (Sand). Konoha remarkably scored the winning that made by Konoha's very own fat…er--I mean chubby goalie, Akamichi Chouji…
Kevin: (eating take-out ramen) Rolghlhl Thkaeh Clasdfip!! (Translation: Roll the Clip!)
Game Announcer #1: Here comes Team SandMen closing in with the ball and NO!! They miss their only chance!
Game Announcer #2: Oh wait there only 3 seconds on the clock, and here comes Akamichi Chouji, goalkeeper of Ramen kicks the ball half-way. Team SandMen tries to intercept…
Game Announcer #1: Oh no, they miss and the ball is still rolling here's the goalie and, oh wait the goalie is ASLEEP and the ball goes in! KONOHA WINS THE FINALS GAME!!
(The crowd applauses and cheers, and the goalie finally wakes up.)
Sonny: Wasn't that amazing?! Anyway here is number seven, the dramatic event with the no skillful Light Yagami and his acting skills of being a sports mascot for the ARGOS!!
Kevin: Yes we got him off-guard while he was taking an "oui-oui"; he was actually feeding an apple to some mysterious BEING. Probably a shinigami or a Death God!
Sonny: Sorry we can't show you fans the clip because he asked not to, or he will kill us with his Death Note… so here's number six, the ACW (Anime-Cartoon Wrestling) PowerBOMB event! In this 16-man free-for-all, 15 fighters ganged up on one particular fighter called Kurosaki Ichigo with deadly, powerful weapons from under the ring! But, all 15 fighters who tried to gang up on him ended up being beaten to a bloody pulp by his sword and got the belt!
Kevin: Here's number five on the Top Ten, the massive protests against 4kids TV (BOOO!!) during the torch relay for the 2008 Summer Animation Olympics for the treatment against several animes…such as Ultimate Muscle, Shaman King, Yu-Gi-Oh!, and others!
Luffy: Don't forget our show! We got dubbed really, REALLY BAD! Not to mention Roronoa Zoro's name…
(While with the crew, Zoro sees the big screen TV mounted on the studio wall and sees and hears Luffy saying "IT WAS CHANGED TO ZOLO!!")
Roronoa Zoro: …WHAT?! I'M GONNA GET YOU LUFFY! RIGHT AFTER THE SHOW! JUST YOU WAIT AND SEE! (He takes out a sword.)
Sonny: We gotta take a break now, so we'll be back! Stay tuned!
(A FEW 30-SECOND COMMERCIAL BREAKS)
Kevin: We are BACK! Before we get to the Top Three, we are going to announce number four, the craziest moment during when NaruSaku fans broke into an angry mob and destroyed the set and hospitalizing us...
Sunny: (under breath) I hated those guys! Roll the clip!
(Clip plays the event)
Kevin: RUN, SONNY!
(Both run as the rabid, angry fans destroy the set. Three fans break the camera and beating up the cameraman catching the action on the set. Several other fans take chase at the two anchormen.)
Sonny: I think they chased us because we knocked one of them unconscious…(HINT: S.C: A.E. #4) here is now the Top Three with number three as Starbucks having to sponsor ONCE at an annual BBQ at the Fallsview Casino, until one of the staff members insulted a C.E.O of Starbucks and got us kicked out… that was funny. And now before we show you, the viewers the NUMBER ONE! Here is the number two spot…
Kevin: The number two spot is the Dodo plane we had that advertises our episode, crashed into the studio because the pilot was having sex with a cheap hooker, and now he is a fired homeless bum who lives outside the main building.
Sonny: Luffy, will you do the honour of announcing the number one of the Top Ten of EVERYTHING??
Luffy: Why not? The number one is…YOU GUYS! The most awesome sports anchormen here because you guys rock!!
Sonny: Well, that's it for today's episode of Sports Centre: Animation Edition!
Kevin: Hope you see us next time…
Sonny, Kevin, and Luffy: UNTIL THEN, GOOD NIGHT EVERYBODY!!
(AT BACKSTAGE…)
Kevin: Hey Sunny, wanna get a beer?
Sonny: Sure, why not?
(Suddenly, the Straw Hat Pirates finally arrive, and in their way.)
Luffy's Nakama: WHERE THE HELL IS LUFFY?!
Kevin and Sonny: (pointing at the sitting Luffy) THAT WAY!
Luffy's Crew: (looks at Luffy) LUFFY! YOU SON OF A BITCH!
Luffy: UH-OH! (begins to run)
Luffy's Crew: GET BACK HERE, YOU LITTLE MOTHERF--KER!!
(They push Sonny and Kevin to the ground, as they chase Luffy around the set, in a typical One Piece chase scene.)
END!