Hayley's P.O.V

"So I suppose you and Ethan are together now?" He sounded bitter, and his eyes were not quite level with mine. I hated that my cheeks were burning fiercely; if he noticed, he would know exactly how badly he'd gotten to me.

Before properly thinking about it, I found myself firing back with a strong, fierce, "Yes." My eyes stared straightforward, daring him to look me in the eyes.

"I rather enjoyed the show you put on out there," he said, finally looking up to meet my gaze. His eyes were dark and cloudy, something unrecognizable swimming within them.

"That's great, Nathan," I said heatedly, balling my hands into small, tight fists. "You're really on a roll tonight, you know that?"

"I don't know - "

"Just...just shut up, Nathan," I said, very calmly. "You followed me here tonight, and don't try to tell me otherwise. I don't know exactly what you're trying to do here, but whatever it is...just stop."

He took a few steps toward me, mere inches separating us now; I could feel his breath on my cheek, could see the tiny specks of green surrounded by the blue in his eyes.

"Just stop." He said these words dryly, flatly in a soft whisper. "Just stop."

I nodded, swallowing hard. I felt unexplainably lightheaded. "Yes. Just stop."

He looked defeated, his shoulders slumped, his head suddenly down. I bit my lip, needing a distraction from the sight of him, my heart pounding loudly against my chest. He looked so like the Nathan I had once known in that moment.

"Right," he said suddenly, stepping away from me, his eyes burning with something I couldn't decipher. "Sorry."

My brow furrowed in confusion as he brushed past me, walking back into the restaurant. His shoulder made contact with my exposed arm and a chill went down my spine; I turned suddenly, watching him disappear amongst the lights and tables. I realized then that he had been trying to tell me something, something I had been secretly wanting to hear ever since that last day at the lake; but as I made to follow him, I knew that it was too late.

The moment had passed; it was gone. It had disappeared with him in the dimly lit restaurant, everything seeming to blur together in shades of gold. He was making his way back to Natalie, no doubt. If it had not been for my stupid mouth, everything could have turned out differently. I sighed as I headed back into the restaurant in search of Ethan, catching him in the corner of my eye at our table. I made my way over to the table and sat down across from him, smiling nervously.

"Judging from the look on his face when he came back inside, I'm betting that you ripped him a new one," Ethan said with a grin, tipping his glass toward me.

I offered him a half-smile, my eyes not meeting his. I took hold of my drink and put the glass to my lips, grimacing slightly as the alcohol slid down my throat. I could see Nathan's table from where I sat, and it was now empty; he and Natalie had obviously left, probably hand-in-hand. I turned away from the empty table and refocused my attention on Ethan, although I still remained silent.

"You know, he had a hell of a lot of nerve coming over here," Ethan said, shaking his head slightly. "I can't believe he actually had the balls to do it."

"Well, Nathan has always been a little impulsive," I said, taking another sip of my drink. "Usually he acts without really thinking things through."

He nodded. I once again averted his gaze, instead choosing to focus my attention on my dwindling glass of rum and coke. He placed his hand on mine, forcing me to look up at him. He was smiling, but there was uncertainty written all over his face.

"I don't know what really happened here tonight," he said. "But when you kissed me, it felt like nothing had ever changed between us. It felt like it used to. I really want to give this another chance."

"So do I," I replied, realizing my error a moment too late. Still, I didn't stop; it was almost as if I truly wanted Ethan back in my life.

"Do you really mean that?" he asked, the uncertainty in his eyes more prominent than before.

"Yes," I said, squeezing his hand reassuringly.

"So...there's nothing between you and Nathan? Nothing at all?" His eyes were wide and imploring, and his fingers tightened around mine slightly.

I shook my head. "No. I got over him a long time ago. We've both moved on with our lives."

He looked incredibly relieved as a large grin spread across his lips. "You don't know how glad I am to hear that."

I smiled back at him, forcing myself to believe that this was the right decision. Nathan was gone now, about to start his new life with Natalie at his side. I had to move on from that, and I had to accept that there was no future for us. There was, however, a future for Ethan and I, and that was what I had to focus on. I had to forget about that silly summer fling that had ended so long ago. It was time to grow up and start living my life without the memory of that summer following me everywhere I went.

I wouldn't let Ethan and I became the super-couple we had once been. When people saw us, they would see us as two different people instead of one giant being; I would make sure of that. As I sat at the table, my hand lightly entwined with Ethan's, I told myself that I wouldn't lose my identity with him again. He squeezed my hand and I grinned, falling back into comfortable familiarity.

"Now, as for the flowers, I can't quite decide between dendrobium orchids or dahlias. I was thinking that we could possibly combine the two, but it might be a bit...much." Natalie held up two photographs in front of Nathan, staring at him imploringly.

"Er," he began, scratching his head, "I think they're both quite lovely. Really, it's up to you. I can't be bothered with flowers."

Natalie scowled and glared at him. "Nathan, this is our wedding, not just mine. We have to make decisions together, even things you consider to be trivial."

Nathan sighed. "I don't think flowers are trivial, love, I just think that you're better suited to make that decision. I don't know the difference between roses and daisies, to be honest."

"Well, lucky for you we're deciding between orchids and dahlias, and the pictures of these flowers are currently staring you in the face. So, choose." She tapped her foot impatiently against the hardwood floor, and Nathan found his patience dwindling rapidly.

"Fine. I like the ones on the right. The dahlias, I suppose," he said, running a hand through his hair in annoyance.

"Really?" Natalie replied, scrunching her nose up slightly. "I think I like the orchids better."

Nathan felt as though he was going to explode, but he kept his temper under control. "I like the orchids as well. Let's have those, then."

"But if you really prefer the dahlias..."

"No, I really prefer the orchids. Really." He did his best to smile reassuringly, and it seemed to be enough for Natalie; she smiled and kissed him quickly, picking up the phone and placing the order. He sighed in relief, rubbing his temples gingerly; he could feel a headache coming on.

It had been a rather hectic month in Nathan's life. He had been bombarded with wedding preparations and questions, forced to make decisions he didn't care much about. If it had been up to him, he would have preferred to just take Natalie to a church and marry her without all the frills and preparations. He knew, however, that the wedding was important to her, and he grudgingly went along with the planning. He couldn't help but think, though, that if he were marrying Hayley things wouldn't be so complicated. It was an utterly stupid thought to have, but sometimes as he lay awake at night, listening to Natalie's soft snores, he couldn't control the thoughts that danced across his mind.

It had been nearly four weeks since his encounter with Hayley at The Ivy, and he had not spoken to her since. He was not quite sure he wanted to. He had been extraordinarily weak that night, almost blurting out what had been swimming around in his mind since she had come back to Tree Hill. He had been so close to saying it, to telling her that he was willing to give up everything if it meant being with her again. But she had stopped him, and in the weeks that followed he had became grateful that she had. He could have ruined everything he had made for himself since her departure four years previously, and for what? It was obvious that Hayley had moved on, and so had he. He knew there was no future for them, not when he was engaged and she was involved with someone else.

Still, he could not quite shake the feeling that had crept upon him as he sat watching Hayley kiss Ethan. He had never felt as jealous as he had in that moment, watching his fingers get lost in her silky hair, seeing her smile ever so slightly as his lips crashed against hers. He had the distinct feeling that it should've been him instead of Ethan. It should've been him sitting there with her, laughing with her, his fingers interlaced with hers. He also knew that it was useless to think of such things; his life was full of plans, and he wasn't quite sure that he wanted to change them, especially for Hayley. She had never been one for stability, routine, or planning; there was no guarantee of a future with someone like her.

"Nathan?" Natalie's voice interrupted him from his thoughts. "Nathan, could you come here for a moment?"

He sighed quietly and lifted himself out of his comfortable armchair, making his way into the bedroom. The sight that met him there left him absolutely breathless.

Natalie smiled nervously as she twirled around in a beautiful white wedding gown. "I know it's a bit untraditional to have the groom see the dress before the wedding," she said, "but I really wanted to know your opinion of it before I buy it. This may not even be the one I decide to get, to be honest. The designer brought it over earlier on, so I could test it out."

Nathan still could not bring himself to speak. It was as if he wasn't seeing her at all; all he could imagine was Hayley standing before him, dressed in that beautiful gown. He was imagining seeing her walking down the aisle towards him, a bright smile on her face; he was imagining a house with a backyard and a fence, children with her hair and her eyes, rainy nights spent curled up by the fire. He couldn't get the image out of his mind even as Natalie looked at him expectantly, her smile faltering slightly.

"It's a beautiful dress," he said at last, but he was shaking his head. "But I don't quite think it's...right."

Her face fell. "What do you mean?" Her voice was shrill.

"You look smashing in it, love," he said reassuringly. "But I think you could wear something even more beautiful." The truth was that he couldn't bear to see her in that dress, not when all he could imagine was Hayley wearing it instead.

"You know," she began, examining herself in the mirror, "I was thinking of putting more jewels on the bodice. I suppose this dress is a bit understated."

In his eyes it was perfect, but it was made for a different woman. He nodded his agreement. "More jewels would be great, love. Whatever you want."

She smiled. "All right, then. I'll just get changed and then we can decide what to do for tea today." She placed a quick kiss on his lips as she ushered him out of the room, closing the door behind her.

Nathan collapsed onto the couch, his attention falling upon the day's newspaper that was sitting on the coffee table. He picked it up and began to flip through it, stopping to read a few interesting pieces. He finally ended up on the society page, where two very familiar faces stared back at him. He immediately began to read the small block of text that accompanied the photograph, his breath catching in his throat as he finished. Fuming, he slammed the newspaper back onto the table, reached for his cell phone and began to dial.

Thanks for the few reviews, I appreciate it.

The next chapter is taking a little longer to write then i thought, so i'll apologize now for the wait ahead.