Chapter Nine
Colliding
Hermione woke, and stretched. She felt smooth materiel glide over her arms, and legs. There was a green, and silver blanket over her. She saw a printed snake on it. It was a Slytherin blanket. Malfoy must have come down for a drink sometime in the night, and covered her. A warmness washed over at her at the thought. He was a Malfoy, but he at least deserved a thank you for doing something sweet, something so unlike him.
Jumping up from the couch, she jogged up the stairs. At the top step she collided with something solid, and fell backwards feeling the awful tug at the pit of her stomach that a person always felt when they were suddenly falling. She knew that she was going to hurt herself, possibly break her neck, but a hand gruffly snatched her upper arm keeping her leaned back over the stairs.
Panicked Hermione looked at the owner of the hand, and saw the only other person it could be. A very calm Malfoy, the fringe of his platinum hair into his eyes that were no longer cold, but worrying. For a moment she thought he was going to drop her, but he pulled her to his chest. She let out the breath she was holding.
"Thank you," she gasped looking up into his unchanging expression.
"...You're welcome."
In moments Hermione's relief passed, and she took in their position. Malfoy still clung to her arm, and she was still pressed against him inhaling his intoxicating scent.
They weren't in a library, or any place that would require quiet, but she whispered anyhow. "Malfoy..."
"Yes?"
"I think we're, um, breaking the rules..."
Softly he laughed. "Granger, rules were made to be broken..."
Before she could utter a sound his mouth collided with hers, rough, and filled with need. His hand tangled itself in her hair, while the other gripped her waist. She wrapped her arms around his neck, giving in. The rough kiss turned to gentle, and passionate. He moaned when her fingers trailed the back of his neck. It was like a wave crashing her down into oblivion. She lost herself as his tongue caressed hers.
As soon as it begun it ended, they stood apart at opposite ends of the hallway abruptly aware of who they were kissing. Their eyes were glazed over, and Hermione's heart sunk as she watched Malfoy shake his head, touching his lips thoughtfully, then his eyes grew cold.
"Look, Granger, this didn't mean anything. It didn't even happen. You're still a mudblood. I'm too good for you." He ambled back to his room, but he couldn't shut the door because Hermione had lodged her foot in the way.
Blood was pounding in her head, she could feel herself go scarlet. "No, you look Malfoy. I would have broken my neck on those stairs; you saved my life. We're now even."
"So, what's your point," he snarled.
"Don't feel bad about killing me. Next time you can shove me down those stairs with a clear conscious, that is if you had any!" She stomped to her room, and slammed her door. She leaned against it, and cried. She felt disloyal, and immoral. Harry, and Ron would have a fit if they knew what just happened. They would never forgive her.
She fell on her bed clutching a pillow to her chest, and cried herself to sleep.
It was late. That was all Hermione knew. She had woken in a cold, wet spot on her pillow. The memories of what happened flooded her, and she was near tears again. She sat up, hugging her knees to her chest.
Malfoy had let down his guards for what she could only assume was hours ago. How did he feel? There was only one way to find out. She cleared her throat, and hoping that he was asleep, called out quietly, "accio journal."
She dabbed her eyes on her sleeve, and focused her eyes on the next page.
24/9/96
She was so sweet lying there asleep on the couch. Beautiful, innocent, blissfully unaware of me. She was curled up like she was cold, and I covered her in my Slytherin blanket. She looked so good, I wanted to stay there all night, and watch her sleep, but I feared I would scare her if she woke.
Then this morning I kissed her. I intended to kiss her. It was purposeful, and I loved it. It felt wonderful, her lips soft, and tasted of strawberry's. I dreamed it for so long, and when it came true I acted like a bloody moron. I pulled away from her, I called her a mudblood. I told her that it never happened, and I was too good for her. It's not true, quite opposite, really. Then she said something that tore my heart from my chest. She told me that we were even, that I could kill her. I don't want to kill her. It's not that I don't have the guts, it's because I don't have the heart. She has it as corny as that sounds.
I'm no longer who I strived to be. It has nothing to do with her, but with me. I can't live to my father's expectations anymore, it almost cost my life to do it for as long as I have. It's over. I give up the fortune, my blood status, I give up everything. With, or without her, I'm starting over.
Hermione gingerly touched the words on the page as if not really believing them. There was no reason in the world why Malfoy would lie in his journal. She glimpsed over at her cracked door. She set the book down, and with quiet steps walked across the hall to Malfoy's door. She contemplated on knocking, but decided against it.
The room held exaggerated shadows. She saw a lump under the covers of the four poster bed. Beside it she could see his wand on his nightstand. She understood about keeping the wand so near, but it did little good if he was this heavy of a sleeper. She sat on the bed, and leaned over his figure, sweeping the hair from his eyes. Hermione pulled her hand back. It was too intimate, it was going over the line, being in his room, touching him like that. She went to stand, but halfway up she felt a hand grasp her wrist tugging her down.
Malfoy gazed at her through clear eyes expectantly.
"I'm sorry," she said, but he didn't let her go, and she felt fear grip her. That is until he jerked her to him, pressing his lips to hers for a second.
"No, I am... Have you been crying?"
"No," she said defensively.
"You have... Granger, I'm sorry, I didn't mean -"
"Who said it had anything to do with you? I miss school is all." It wasn't a total lie, and Malfoy didn't call her on it, but she gave herself away. Tears brimmed her eyes again. "It's not you," she insisted.
He nodded, and sat up taking her in his arms. She laid against his bare chest, and cried. His arms tightened as he stroked her hair. He whispered in her hair, "I'll never call you that again... From now on I'll make things easier on you. We'll start over. Promise."
"It's not that easy."
"You're right, it's not, but we're both stubborn people, and we'll make it easy. Please, Granger, give me a chance to right everything I've done wrong."
"We don't live that long..."
He chuckled, "let me try." He pulled the blankets over her.
Hermione nodded, "okay," and she dozed off asleep in his arms with the last thought that one day, one action, it could change everything.