Chapter 12 Breaking Up
September 29, 2010
Deb fumbled for a drink and didn't even bother with the cup. She poured the vodka straight down her throat and didn't stop until she felt the urge to breathe.
She didn't know how things had gotten so bad that she'd rather sit in her room and drink than spend time with her husband. Dan had been unbelievably harsh at Nathan's game a couple days ago and he hadn't been any better today.
"Drinking again?" Dan's sarcasm cut like a knife. "Getting up to a bottle a day, aren't you?"
Deb jumped at the sound of his voice. She'd been so preoccupied that she didn't hear him walk in the room.
"I should be," she snapped. "Being married to you would drive anyone to alcohol."
"Admit it, you just like messing up and now you have the perfect way to do it."
"Screw you!" Deb screamed.
"That would be nice," Dan snarled. "I think that I've almost forgotten what it must be like to have a wife that opens her legs at least once a month."
"If you want some, Dan," Deb laughed, "I'm going to have to have a lot more to drink."
Nathan sat in his room with his hands over his ears. His parents were so loud that he couldn't shut out their voices. Snatches of their conversation kept coming into his room.
"You son of a bitch . . . lied to me for years!"
"Frigid . . . lucky I stayed with you this long . . ."
". . . doing me any favors! My parents supported us all this time while you were . . ."
Finally he climbed out of bed and laced up his sneakers. His parents didn't even hear him leave the house.
Nathan walked aimlessly for an hour and somehow ended up at Haley's house. He knocked on the door and when Haley opened it she looked a little surprised to see him, but then her face broke out into a wide grin.
"Heartbreaker!"
"Hey." Nathan moved into her embrace naturally and gave her one of his patented hugs. Haley called them rib-crackers.
After he set her back down she pulled him inside and led him to the living room.
"Your timing is great, I was just about to watch a movie and stuff myself with ice cream."
"What, again?" Nathan smiled. "You're an addict and you really should do something about it. Admitting you have a problem is the first step."
"Ha, freakin', ha."
"Where are your parents?"
"Somewhere on I-94. They decided to make one of their impulsive trips to visit my sister in Minnesota."
"Quinn?"
"Yep."
Haley peeled the top off the carton and brought bowls, spoons, and an ice cream scoop.
"Hey, I'm in training."
"Just one scoop," Haley said, "it won't kill you."
Nathan rolled his eyes and accepted the bowl while Haley squeezed hot fudge over her rocky road.
Settling back on the couch Nathan felt himself relax for the first time that day. He leaned his head against one of the pillows and let everything else fade from his mind.
Friday night Nathan found himself at a party thrown by one of the guys on the football team. He hadn't really wanted to go but he couldn't stay in the house, even though his father had left early this morning and was going to be away all week. After the latest fight with his mother Dan had packed a bag and slammed out of the house; he'd been planning on visiting Florida next week to talk to Henry Ferris, an executive of one of the most successful sports agencies in the state.
After the screaming match with his wife Dan had decided to fly out five days early. He shouted about needing to get away from the "goddamn bitch" that he'd married and then he'd booked himself a seat on the earliest possible flight.
It had felt like the walls were closing in and he didn't really want to see or talk to anyone. Someone was trying to carry on a conversation with him but he couldn't even focus enough to hold up his end of it: replying with nods and uh-huhs. He was at the house of someone he didn't know, talking to some girl that he didn't care about, and drinking something out of a cup that probably had enough alcohol in it to blind him.
"Hey man." Tim came up behind him.
Nathan turned away in relief from the girl who was talking to him. She frowned at his back before walking away.
"How's it going?"
"Party's a little boring, but at least Richard's got beer." Tim took a gulp from the can in his hand.
"Hand me one, will you?" Nathan popped the tab and drank it down quickly.
The night wore on and six beers later Nathan was still going strong.
Tim looked at him with just a hint of worry. "Maybe you should slow down, we've got practice tomorrow."
"Whatever." Nathan voice was slurred. He opened another beer and made his way into the living room where guests of varying degrees of drunkenness were hanging out.
"Nathan!" A girl he'd been talking to earlier waved him over. What was her name . . . Justine Kettle.
"Hey, Justine."
She flushed slightly, pleased that he knew who she was.
"Sit down, we're about to play a game."
"Yeah?" Nathan's attention was already wandering but Justine pulled him down to sit next to her and his legs were so boneless that he didn't want to make the effort to get up again.
Justine's voice chatted excitedly in his ear but he wasn't paying attention to a thing she said. There were about five other kids there, throwing back shots and talking.
Finally they were done with whatever they were doing and Justine grabbed his arm and pulled him over to the corner. Before he knew exactly what was happening she was kissing him. She wasn't bad at it and he put his arms around her waist. Justine broke away to catch her breath and he swayed for a moment, trying to get his bearings, when she kissed him on the neck.
Nathan smiled slightly and closed his eyes as Justine left her mark on him as he slid his hands up her sides. She wrapped her arms around his neck and he murmured her name.
"What!" Justine snapped. "Who's Haley?"
Nathan reeled back, his eyes wide with surprise.
"What?"
"You called me Haley!" Justine hissed. "Why don't you go find that skank if that's who you want?!"
Justine flounced off before Nathan could say anything else. Tim approached him with an amused look on his face.
"What just happened?"
"I don't know." Nathan rubbed a hand over his face.
"Give me your keys, I'll drive you home."
Nathan handed them over without protest. Suddenly he didn't really feel like partying anymore.
When Nathan answered the door the next day he saw his brother standing there looking at him expectantly.
"Lucas, what are you doing here?"
"Are you high? Yesterday you asked me to come over early so we could get in a practice game."
"Oh, right."
Lucas took in Nathan's appearance: he was still wearing the rumpled clothes he'd had on last night and his eyes were bloodshot.
"Rough night?" Lucas asked.
"Not bad," Nathan said shortly.
"You look like ass." Lucas leaned in a little and then quickly drew away. "You smell like it, too."
Nathan walked back into the house, leaving Lucas to follow and close the door behind him.
Lucas' playful attitude disappeared. He'd seen Nathan's house—Dan's house—from the outside a few times but he'd never even thought about crossing the threshold.
It was nice, spacious and well decorated. That was probably Deb's doing. The entranceway was large and welcoming with a half-spiral staircase leading up to the upper level. Lucas followed Nathan into the living room.
Nathan sat down on a chair, very slow and very careful, and picked up the two aspirin and glass of water that had been sitting on the side table.
"I can't play this morning, Luke. I'm gonna try and get in another two hours of sleep before I have to show up for practice."
"You're going like that?" Lucas looked skeptical.
"If I don't, what Whitey will do to me will make this hangover feel like a mosquito bite."
"That's for sure." Lucas grimaced as he remembered some of the creative ways Whitey had punished him for being late. "Where's Deb?"
"I don't know."
Lucas looked confused. "You don't know?"
"She wasn't here when I got back," Nathan said, annoyed.
His brother eyed him for a moment but he dropped it.
"Lucas?"
He turned around. "Tim? Hey, what are you doing here?"
"By the time we got back it was so late that Nate said I could just crash on his couch."
"You don't look like you're about to puke your guts out."
"The night before practice?" Tim looked at Nathan. "I'm not that stupid."
"You can leave at any time." Nathan put his head in his hands and moaned before turning to his brother. "I still want to work on my three-pointers, can we meet up tomorrow?"
"Maybe, I have to talk to Haley, we might have plans," Lucas said.
"Haley?" Tim's ears perked up. "Your girlfriend's name is Haley?"
"Friend. Yeah." Lucas eyed Tim. "Do you know her?" he asked skeptically.
"No," Tim said thoughtfully as Nathan's expression froze. "But I think I've heard the name before."
"Anyway," Nathan said repressively, glaring his friend into silence. "Give me a call later?"
"Sure." Lucas gave his brother a half-smile. "I think that it's great you're still trying to be as good as I am."
Nathan snorted. "I passed you a long time ago old man."
Lucas rolled his eyes good-naturedly and left.
Tim turned knowing eyes on his friend. "Your brother's friend, huh?"
"Shut up."
"Does he know that you're calling out her name while you're . . . being active . . . with other girls?"
"I said shut up, Tim." His eyes flickered over to him. "How would you know what I said? Were you spying on me, perv?"
"Oh, Justine's pissed off and all of her little minions are looking out for that 'Haley bitch.'"
Nathan's face fell. "You're kidding. Why is she so mad? We're not even dating. And where did you learn the word 'minions'?"
"PSAT word. And stop trying to change the subject. You're so out of it Nate."
"What are you talking about?"
"You've been carrying her books and walking her home from school, right?"
"She asked me to do that! It wasn't a big deal or out of my way, it's not like I was trying to get her to like me."
"So? She probably thought she'd found another admirer." Tim shook his head. "I told you to stay away from the Queen Bee. She's been trying to create the future Prom king and queen for months now."
"That's not happening," Nathan said flatly.
"Why not? It's not like you have to marry her afterwards, you'd probably have a good time if you went with her."
"I don't think so."
Tim shrugged. "Then you'd better stay out of her way, or let your stats drop so that you're not the best player and she can move on to bigger and better."
"Wonderful," Nathan muttered. "Those my only options?"
Tim thought carefully. "You could move out of state."
Nathan walked off the court, trying to control his temper. It was his junior year and he was playing better than ever. He should be having one of the best times of his life, but he wasn't. His father had acted like a complete ass during the game. His game. Haley had flown out all the way from her school a few times to watch him play but now that she'd graduated and was back in Tree Hill for a while she'd never missed one. He'd assumed that she'd leave at the end of the summer, but she'd stayed. He wasn't sure why but he was grateful.
It felt like everything else in his life was up in the air. His parents didn't even bother hiding their fights from him anymore, all he had to look forward to at home was screaming matches and slammed doors. His mother tried to pretend that everything was fine but night after night he found himself taking care of her. She thought that he didn't notice the empty bottles that she hid in her room. He laughed to himself. Weren't his parents supposed to be taking care of him?
Dan caught Nathan's arm as he was walking back to the locker room.
"What the hell was that?"
"What is your problem Dad? You do know that we won, right?" Nathan tried to pull away from his father.
"You've been setting up too many assists. When scouts come to evaluate your performance you're going to have to take your goddamn shots!"
"Will you get off me?" Nathan yanked away but Dan grabbed him again and slammed him up against the lockers.
"I can't believe that after all the time and money spent on you, you're just going to screw up your career. Is that why you wanted to live with your mother? Because I know she doesn't give a damn about what's important either."
"Keep her out of this," Nathan said through his teeth.
"It's no wonder you're such a screw-up, living with that—"
"Hey!" Haley jogged towards them and the look on Nathan's face became even harsher, if that was possible.
"Get off him!" Haley got between them and Dan stepped back, glaring at her.
"I'm talking to my son, that's still allowed, right?"
"Do we have to get a restraining order, Dan?" Haley asked, her eyes narrowed.
"I'm sorry, who are you?"
"Nice try, but you've been skulking around your wife for way too long for me to believe that you don't already know."
Dan's lips tightened and he moved as if he was going to push her aside. Nathan got one hand on Haley's arm and pulled her behind him. His face was blank but his voice made even Dan pause.
"Leave, Dad." Nathan waited until his father was out of sight before turning and walking down the hallway. He ushered Haley in front of him.
When they got out to the parking lot Haley asked, "Where are you going? Everyone's still inside."
"What were you thinking?"
"Excuse me?"
"Talking to my dad like that, are you trying to make things worse for me?"
"No, I just thought . . ."
"Well, don't. I don't need you stepping into my business. I can handle him."
"He shouldn't speak to you that way," Haley glared at him and folded her arms, "you shouldn't have to deal with his 'let me live out my basketball dreams through my son' thing."
"You don't know anything about it."
"You're right, I don't know what it's like to have that kind of asshole for a father."
"Oh, I suppose your family's perfect, then."
Haley looked taken aback. "I never said that they were."
"I'm sure if we pick their lives apart we could find something that you're ashamed of."
Haley's face went white and she turned and walked away without saying anything else.
Nathan watched her leave and then closed his eyes and leaned against a car. He pounded one fist on the roof and ran after her. She'd gotten all the way down the block and he called after her.
"Haley!"
She didn't even slow down.
He ran and caught up with her.
"Haley, I'm sor—"
"Don't." Haley fished around in her bag for her cell phone and hit speed dial. "Luke, I'm not going to need a ride home . . . no, I'm fine I just feel like walking . . . Nathan's going to go straight home, too, he had a run-in with Dan . . . he's okay . . . yeah . . . I'll see you tomorrow."
"Haley—"
"Why don't you go back to the school and get a ride home," she said quietly. "I'll see you tomorrow."
"Come on."
"I don't want to talk right now."
Nathan sighed. "Can I walk you home?"
Haley didn't answer and he took that as a yes. They passed the football field and Nathan searched for something to say. He ached to touch her, to have her wrap him in her arms but now there was this distance between them and it hurt.
When they finally got to her house she glanced at him once. "How are you getting home?"
"I'm going to walk back."
"It's getting late, you shouldn't be out alone."
"I'll just call Tim, then, he'll pick me up."
Haley nodded and opened the door. Nathan followed her inside and pulled out his cell. He was about to make the call but he snapped his phone shut and walked into the kitchen where Haley was busy putting away the dishes.
"Do you want something?"
"I thought we were friends."
Haley had a look of controlled frustration. "We are friends."
"Doesn't that mean that we can talk?"
"We can talk tomorrow when I'm not as pissed off."
"I'm sorry about what I said. I don't understand why you're so mad. Your family is perfect."
"Nobody's family is perfect, Nathan." She looked at him for a moment. "Sit down."
Nathan's serious expression lightened a bit and he pulled up a chair.
Haley pulled a pint of Ben and Jerry's out of the freezer and got two spoons. She handed one over and sat down across from him.
"My parents almost got divorced."
"What?" Nathan sat up stiffly in shock. "When?"
"You must have been, maybe, thirteen at the time. You know my Mom works as a creative director at an ad agency?" Haley paused and Nathan nodded. "Well, it's a national company and they transferred someone from the branch in New York to work here and it just happened to be an old boyfriend of Mom's. Doug Thorpe.
"They were friends and they started hanging out a lot and before you know it office gossip spread and my Dad heard some of it. He and my Mom had the worst fight that I've ever seen, he was accusing her of keeping secrets and she was mad because he didn't trust her . . ." Haley spooned more ice cream into her mouth. "It was bad."
"I'm so sorry, Haley."
"The really weird thing is . . . that Doug guy really did want Mom back—even though she was married and had six kids with another man," Haley said with a trace of bitterness. She shook her head. "It was one of the worst times of my life." Haley looked at him then. "Nobody's perfect."
"I'm sorry."
"It's not your fault."
"No, I mean, I'm sorry for acting like a jerk."
"Well, I shouldn't have insulted your dad."
"Are you saying you think you were wrong about him?" Nathan gave her a slight smile.
"No," Haley laughed, "I'm not prepared to go that far. I'm just saying that I shouldn't call him names in front of you."
"So it's okay to do it when I'm not there?" There was a definite glint in Nathan's eye.
"Don't tease me." Haley narrowed her eyes at him.
Nathan laughed.
"How are things with your parents?"
"They ignore each other, mostly. Maybe if they talked they could work out their issues."
"You're lying," Haley said bluntly.
Nathan looked away while Haley watched him carefully.
"But when you're ready to talk, I'll be here." Haley changed the subject and Nathan relaxed. "What does a young basketball star do these days on a Friday night?"
Nathan rolled his eyes. "Whatever you and Luke did when he was here. It hasn't changed that much in the five whole years since you left high school."
"Well, it feels more like ten. Besides I didn't really hang with Lucas when he did go out."
"Why not?"
"It wasn't really my thing."
"Come on, you never went to a party with him?"
Haley's brow furrowed. "Not that I can remember. At least not a basketball crowd party."
Nathan smiled. "Do you want to go to one now?"
Haley laughed and then sobered when she saw that Nathan was serious. "No way."
"It'll be fun."
"No it won't."
Nathan teased and cajoled but Haley was unmovable. Finally he gave up but he warned her, "Someday I'm going to get you to go to one of the parties we have after the game."
"Good luck with that." Haley shook her head.
"I don't know what I'm going to do." Deb stared off to the side. "I used to love my job so much and now I feel like work is pointless. It's feels like I'm dragging fifty pounds behind me when I go to the office."
Karen poured more coffee into Deb's cup. "I'm sure that you can find something else if that's what you want. Take advantage of the fact that you have your Master's degree."
"And do what with it?" Deb sighed. "I'm a little tired of the corporate thing."
Karen looked around her café. "You could work here."
"Thanks for the offer, Karen, but I don't think waitressing is for me and you know I can't cook."
"Not as a waitress," Karen huffed with laughter. "As a business partner."
"You're kidding." Deb stared at her friend.
"Do I look like I'm joking?"
"But . . . what about Dan?"
"What about him?"
"Karen . . . I think it's amazing that we've gotten as close as we have. I can't imagine what it would be like if I couldn't come here and drink coffee with you and talk. But, are you sure about this? I mean . . . don't you think it could get complicated?"
"We've known each other for seven years, I think that if we were going to have a falling out because of our shared history, that it would have happened by now."
"You don't even know what kind of worker I am."
"Of course I do. I've seen you in action, the way you juggle work and Nathan."
"Karen . . ." Deb looked down at her fingers and twisted them together. "I've been drinking . . . a lot."
The small smile disappeared off Karen's face. "When did this start?"
"I don't know. Dan and I would have a fight and I'd have another glass of wine with dinner. Then we started fighting more and then wine became vodka, and then I was drinking almost every night."
"God . . ."
Tears stood out in Deb's eyes. "I don't think Nathan knows."
"Deb, I'm sorry, but I don't think that's true."
"Why?"
"Lucas has told me that Nathan seems more . . . withdrawn than he's ever been."
"Nathan's fine!" Deb insisted. "It's just that he's seen me and his father fighting. I'm going to stop doing that in front of him."
"Even if he hasn't seen you, he might be picking up on some things . . ."
"I said he's fine!" Deb snapped.
Karen just looked at Deb for a moment. "You're right, we shouldn't rush into a business partnership."
Deb felt her heart drop a little. She'd been hoping that Karen would override her concerns.
"Maybe I shouldn't have told you . . ."
"No, Deb. I want you to be able to talk to me, no matter what. But please trust me on one thing. I'm not sure where you're at with your drinking but you want to find help sooner than later. Things can spiral out of control so fast . . ." Karen hesitated. "My father used to drink."
"Oh, Karen, I'm so sorry."
"There are so many times when he could have gotten help and he didn't. Will you go with me to an AA meeting?"
"Karen, it's not like I'm drinking while I'm at work or when I'm around Nathan."
"This is about taking care of you Deb. If you're so stressed that you feel like you have to numb your feelings with alcohol then you should come with me. Can you do that?"
"Okay . . ." Tears ran down Deb's face. "But I don't want anyone to know."
"Good thing it's anonymous, then." Karen smiled, even though her heart was breaking. Deb wasn't that good at lying and hiding. Chances were her family already knew.
Deb laughed at Karen's lame attempt at a joke.
Deb walked into her home and found her husband waiting there.
"Hey," he said.
"Dan, we need to talk."
"I know."
"I want a divorce."
Dan looked completely dumbstruck and Deb was surprised that he was so surprised.
"What?"
"Dan . . . surely this isn't that much of a shock? We've been at each other's throats for years now."
"I thought you were going to suggest counseling," Dan said incredulously.
"I don't think seeing a counselor would help us with our problems."
"How do you know that?" Dan was starting to get angry.
"Because I don't trust you."
"Don't trust me? You were the one having an affair—"
"I wasn't having an affair," Deb said calmly. After weeks of going to AA meetings and seeing a counselor privately she'd made her decision. Even if Dan could change, it was too late for them. "Things have been said between us that can't be taken back. I don't want to be married to you anymore and I'm sure that you don't want to be married to me."
"So you'd do this to our son. Break up his family."
"What family, Dan? When was the last time that we did anything together? Just the three of us?" Dan was silent and Deb nodded. "It's over."
"Just like that," Dan said sarcastically.
"It's been coming for a long time."
"What about Nathan?"
"We're going to have to figure out a way to tell him. And we'll work something out with who he's going to be living with."
"You're not going to get him in this divorce."
Deb looked at Dan with pity. "He's going to be eighteen in a year and off to college not soon after that. By the time the divorce goes through it's not really going to matter who has custody."
Dan just sat there while Deb walked away from him.
When Nathan walked into his house there was something in the air that he'd never felt before. There was anger . . . and something else. Both of his parents were sitting in the kitchen and his mom looked up when she heard him walk in.
"Honey, can you sit down for a minute?"
Nathan looked at her and then at his dad, who was glowering at his mother. "I think I'd rather stand."
"Okay." Deb took a deep breath. "I think that it's pretty obvious that your father and I have been having a lot of problems. And it's come to the point where we can't work them out. We both love you—this has nothing to do with you—but your father and I are getting a divorce."
Nathan wasn't really surprised, and yet he was. His parents' relationship had sucked for years. The last time that he could remember them all being really, truly happy was when he was eight.
"When?" he said expressionlessly.
"I'm not sure yet. It depends on a couple different things, it could be a couple of months or a year, depending on how things go."
"Who am I going to live with?"
"Your father and I still have a lot of things to discuss—"
"You can live with me," Dan broke in.
"Dan," Deb said warningly.
"Why would he want to live with the person who broke up our marriage?"
Deb looked at him for a long time and then just shook her head. "Grow up, Dan." She looked at her son. "It's really your choice, Nate. I'll respect your decision, whatever it is."
Deb stood up and walked out of the kitchen and her son followed her. Dan felt his stomach turn over as he realized that when he moved out, he was probably going to be alone—and then he scoffed to himself. He and Nathan didn't have a perfect relationship, but a boy always needs a father.
Dan was in the room that he used to share with his wife, packing his clothes into a suitcase. Once Deb had told him that she wanted a divorce, things had seemed to speed up. Before he knew it, most of his things had been moved into their beachfront property. She'd already contacted a lawyer and was in the process of dividing their assets. He'd tried to talk to her, but she wasn't having it. He'd tried to dispute some of the things that she felt entitled to in the divorce but she'd agreed to hand over everything except the house.
He'd asked Nathan if he wanted to set up his room for him but he'd said that he was playing well and he didn't want to disrupt his routine.
He walked downstairs and Nathan was just coming in.
"Hey."
"Hey, Dad." Nathan put his hands in his pockets.
"Look, I'm thinking about moving back to Florida." Nathan nodded and Dan looked at him. "Are you sure that you want to stay with your mother?"
"I'm sure. Besides, why would I leave the Ravens now and start all over with a different team?"
"Well, of course you wouldn't do that, but maybe after you graduate you could move down there with me."
"I think I'd rather stay here."
Dan's lips tightened, Nathan's answer was given without thought. He'd never even considered going with him.
"It might be fun, just two guys in the house. Plus, you'd get to see your grandparents more."
"I think Mom's going to need me." Nathan stepped around his father and made his way up the stairs.
Dan looked away for a long moment before laughing to himself.
"What's so funny?"
"Do you really think she's going to stoop to being your girlfriend?"
Nathan froze and turned around with his face set and a smirk in place. "What are you talking about, Dad?"
"Please. You think I didn't notice you panting after that girl? She's putting up with you because she likes your brother, that's all. If you want to date, fine, but keep your relationships casual—with people your own age—and use protection."
"Thanks," Nathan said dryly, "I can use all the relationship advice that I can get from you."
"Isn't she dating some new guy now?" Dan twisted the knife. "She's so busy with him that I haven't seen her at your last two games."
Nathan rolled his eyes. "I'm not six, Dad. Haley was busy and she couldn't come. If you have a lot of work to do, please, feel free to miss a couple games."
"Is that really why you want to stay here? So you can follow behind this Haley girl like a puppy?"
"We're friends," Nathan affected the bored tone that he'd spent years perfecting. "Are you really so out of touch that you don't know the type of girl I usually go for?"
Dan regarded his son evenly while Nathan maintained his poker face. Sometimes his father surprised him with how intuitive he could be. He supposed that was probably one of the things that had made him such a great basketball player: the ability to get inside the head of his opponent.
"You've been following Haley around ever since you met her, even I can see that."
"You really did check out when I was thirteen, didn't you? I could always talk to Mom about who I was with. She always listened."
Dan's jaw tensed. "Whatever kind of girl you're with, I hope you're not counting on her to use birth control. Use a condom, every time. You don't want to make the same mistakes I did."
"Really, Dad? Which mistake was that? Having a baby or abandoning one?"
Nathan walked away, leaving his father to stare after him angrily.
Haley drove towards a house, grumbling to herself. She'd gotten a call on her cell and it was Nathan's ID that had flashed across the screen—but it had been Tim. Apparently, Nathan had gotten drunk and Tim was in no condition to drive either.
She pulled up and got out to find them both nearly passed out on the lawn.
"Gentlemen."
Tim's head slowly drew back and he smiled widely. "Haley! Haley. I love you," he said seriously, and then he laughed.
"Get in the car," Haley said shortly.
She walked over to Nathan and squatted down to look at him. He was sleeping and she smacked him on the face.
"Hey! Hey!" he groaned.
"Get up," Haley ordered. "You're way too big for me to carry you.
"Haley?"
"Yeah, it's me."
"My parents are getting divorced."
"I know," her tone gentled, "I'm sorry."
"I don't really care, I'm happy about it. All they did was fight. It was a nightmare living in the middle of that. My mom's right, it's going to be better if they're apart."
Haley just nodded and managed to help pull him upright. Wedging one shoulder under his armpit she managed to get him to her car. "Tim, open the door."
Breathing hard, she managed to get him into the backseat and rolled down the windows.
"If you guys start feeling sick, lean outside the window, okay? I'll kill you both if either one of you throws up in my car."
Haley dropped Tim off first, his father didn't even bat an eye at Tim's state.
Haley drove up to Nathan's house and turned around in her seat to look at him. His eyes were closed and she thought he'd fallen asleep again. She reached out to shake him awake. He spoke and her hand froze between them.
"Can I come home with you?"
"Nathan." She put a hand on his shoulder. He opened his eyes and then she felt how cold he was.
"Are you feeling okay?" She was alarmed now. "How much did you have to drink?" She climbed into the backseat and put her other hand on his forehead. He closed his eyes again and she shook him. "How much did you drink?"
"I don't know, some beer," he said tiredly. "I'm okay. I've had this much before."
"I don't like your color."
"I'm fine." Nathan jerked away from her hands and Haley sat back.
"I don't think you are. Luke and I haven't even talked to you in three weeks. And then I get a call from Tim telling me that you're both too messed up to get home."
"Thanks for the ride." Nathan tried to get out of the car but Haley grabbed his shoulder and pulled him back.
"Why won't you return my calls? Why won't you talk to us?"
Nathan remained silent and Haley sighed. "Forget it. I should try this again when you're sober."
He sat next to Haley and a part of him wanted to curl up in her arms but he couldn't. What he wanted from her he couldn't have and being around her, now that his family was falling apart, was too painful. Eventually she'd leave him, too. And the thought of that hurt so damn much that he couldn't breathe. And every single time he thought about Lucas he thought about what his father did, and how that had wedged his parents apart. It wasn't like he blamed Lucas . . . but he couldn't hang out with him right now.
Nathan dragged himself out of Haley's car and walked into his house.
His mother was waiting for him. "Where have you been?"
"Out."
"Nathan!"
He ignored her and went to his room.
Haley stood in the café staring into space. It had been two weeks since she'd dropped Nathan off at home, drunk and unwilling to talk, and she hadn't heard a thing from him since. Lucas was trying to look unconcerned for her sake but she knew that Nathan's silence was hurting him.
Haley looked up as the door opened and Deb and Dan walked into the together. The air was crackling with the animosity between them.
Lucas looked over at them and stiffened. Haley put a hand on his shoulder as they watched them walk up to the counter.
"Haley, I'm sorry to come by so late but Nathan hasn't come home and we were wondering if either of you have seen him." Deb looked worried.
"Sorry, we haven't even talked to him. He's been avoiding both of us," Haley said.
Dan glowered at no one in particular and remained silent.
Suddenly Dan's cell phone rang and he answered it quickly. "Nathan?!" he said.
Dan listened for a long time as Deb looked on angrily. He hung up, ignoring his soon-to-be ex-wife's outstretched hand and she snapped at him.
"Dan!"
"It wasn't Nathan, it was the sheriff. Apparently our son and some of his teammates stole a school bus and they were driving it around town," Dan said grimly.
"Are you kidding me?" Haley gasped. "How could they do something like that and think that they weren't going to get caught?"
"Apparently they didn't think of that because they were all drinking," Dan said.
"This is all your fault, Dan," Deb said bitterly.
"You're his mother. He's living with you but I guess it'd be too much to ask for you to keep him in line."
"You son of a bitch!"
"That's enough!" Haley raised her voice above both of theirs. "We've all stood by and watched you two play out your little drama but this is enough. I don't care how much you hate each other, Nathan's going to end up in some teen jail if you don't stop."
"Aren't you the little expert," Dan said nastily. "Maybe we should all sit down for a session of family counseling at your office or maybe we should just meet in your little dorm at the community college that you got into."
"Shut the hell up," Deb said. "She's just trying to help and god knows that with a father like you Nathan's going to need all the support he can get."
"And with a mother like you he'll be lucky if he can stay out of rehab."
A dead silence descended on all four people. The look on Deb's face was heartbreaking.
"Get out," Lucas said to his father. "You need to leave now."
"The disappointment finally speaks—"
Before Dan could say any more Haley grabbed the nearest thing she could reach and threw it at him.
A cup bounced off Dan's head and fell to the ground. Luckily it was made out of plastic and didn't break. Dan looked more surprised than hurt and Haley came around the counter, brandishing her spatula like a knife.
"If you don't get the hell out of here right now I'm going to call the police and have you arrested for trespassing. And then you can spend the night in lockup with your son," she said.
Dan sneered at her before turning and walking out.
Haley felt the tension leave her body and her hands dropped to her sides. She turned around to see both Lucas and Deb staring at her with identical expressions of shock on their faces.
"What were you going to do to him with that spatula?" Lucas asked.
Haley looked at it for a minute before shrugging.
Deb tittered and she and Lucas looked at her for a moment before they all collapsed into laughter. Haley leaned against the counter and tried to catch her breath.
"Thanks, Hales." Lucas gave her a one-armed hug.
Haley sighed and sat down on the stool next to Deb's.
"You can't let him get to you, Deb." Haley put one hand on the woman's shoulder. "You have to find a way to rise above it."
"I know." Deb tapped one fist on the table. "I know, but it's just so hard. Especially when he starts in on me being a bad mother." Deb started to cry. "I try to be a good mom to Nathan. I really do."
"I know that, Deb," Lucas said. "Nathan knows that, too."
"Dan and I were fighting right before Nathan left the house. You should have heard the things he said to us. He hates us both."
"That's not true, he's just mad at everyone right now." Haley walked back behind the counter.
"Yeah. I've tried to talk to him but apparently it's really my fault that you and Dan are getting a divorce," Lucas said dryly.
"Oh, Lucas. Is that what he said?" Deb closed her eyes tiredly. "I'm so sorry, I'll talk to him. I'm not sure what good it'll do, though."
Lucas turned to Haley. "Maybe you could get through to him."
Haley shrugged. "I'll try. He's been avoiding me, too. I'm not sure if he'll want to hear anything I have to say either."
"How could things get this bad? I always thought I had a pretty good relationship with my son and now it's like he can't stand to be around me."
"Deb, everyone knows that Dan's an asshole, so it's pretty much up to you to work this out. You have to find a way so that you and Dan can be civil, at least when you're around Nathan," Haley said earnestly.
"Easier said than done."
"We've got your back Deb," Lucas said.
"Thank you."
"Are you going to go bail Nathan out of jail?" Haley asked.
"No, I think that he needs to stay there for a while. He's been getting into some trouble lately but this is serious. He could really have hurt someone tonight," Deb said.
"Why don't I pick him up tomorrow? I can talk to him then." Haley offered.
"Would you, Haley? That would be great."
"Of course."
Deb hugged them both goodbye before walking out. Lucas looked over at her.
"Do you think he'll listen to you?"
"I'm not sure if I care whether he does or not, I just want to put my foot up his ass."
Lucas laughed. "That I want to see."
Haley rubbed the same spot on the counter over and over again and Lucas put his hand over hers.
"You're really worried about him."
Haley nodded. "I used to be able to read him, Luke. He's so much like you sometimes."
"I hold things back, too."
Haley snorted. "You're an open book. Nathan used to be one, too, but now I'm not as sure about him as I used to be."
"He's growing up, Hales. And everything with his parents . . ."
"I know. It's just that sometimes I wish he was the same little boy."
Lucas squeezed her shoulder. "Come on, I'll walk you home."
The next day Haley stood outside the police station as Nathan walked out. When he saw her leaning against her car with her arms crossed he paused for a minute before walking towards her.
"What are you doing here?"
"I'm giving you a ride," Haley said, her tone disapproving. "Get in the car."
She turned away as Nathan eyed her warily and slid into the passenger seat beside her. Haley drove around Tree Hill, she wasn't trying to go anywhere in particular and Nathan didn't seem to care. He just sat quietly as she meandered around the city. They finally came to a spot that overlooked the river and Haley turned off the ignition before getting out and sitting on the hood to stare out at the water.
Nathan sat in the car for a long time before getting out and glaring at her.
"I thought you were taking me home."
Haley turned to glare back at him. "I lied. I really brought you out here to kill you and dump your body in the river."
Nathan snorted and turned away.
"I can't believe how disappointed I am in you."
"Leave me alone," he said petulantly.
Haley rolled her eyes. "Real mature, Nathan. Would you like to throw a tantrum now? Make it a good one, the kind where you throw yourself on the floor and scream and beat your fists on the ground."
"Why are you even here? Did my Mom talk to you?"
"Yeah, she talked to me. She's feeling a little concerned since her son is acting like a jackass."
Nathan's voice turned nasty, "I'm surprised that your new boyfriend let you out of the house long enough for you to drive down here. Is he tired of you bitching him out already? The sex not good enough for him to put up with it anymore?"
Haley slapped Nathan hard across the face and his eyes snapped to hers, shocked.
Her voice was completely calm. "You aren't a child anymore, Nathan. You're responsible for everything you say and everything you do. Your parents are getting a divorce and that sucks. But you have to deal, because guess what? You're going to run up against things that are worse than this but you still have to be able to suck it up and move on. Everyone's got problems.
"Lucas had to deal with the fact that your father has never shown one bit of love or fucking concern for him—but he doesn't let that change him. He was able to be a real brother to you. In the same situation there are a lot of people who would have just written you off.
"I know that you're in pain but you have to know that your father loves you, so does your mom, and so do I. But don't you ever speak to me like that again."
Nathan stared at Haley and his eyes became brighter and brighter. He turned away so that she couldn't see his face and Haley watched his heaving back. She came up behind him and hugged him from behind and Nathan slumped back against her, crying as if his heart was broken. Haley felt tears sting her eyes but she held them back, holding him tightly as his chest heaved and he apologized.
Haley kept her arms wrapped around him until he was quiet again.
"It's my fault," Nathan said softly.
"What is?"
"My parents. They got divorced because of me. They've been fighting because of me." Nathan's voice was so low that it broke Haley's heart.
"You can't seriously believe that." Nathan turned around; Haley looked into his eyes and saw that he did. She sighed heavily. "Nathan, when marriages fall apart it's never the kid's fault." Nathan sat beside her and rested his head on her shoulder like he'd done when he was little.
Haley ran a hand over his head. "It's not your fault, Nathan. Look at me. I'd never lie to you. You trust me, right?"
Nathan nodded.
"This is not your fault."
Nathan nodded again.
Haley got up and started walking down the path that ran along the river. Nathan put one arm around her shoulders and she wrapped one around his waist.
"I come here to walk whenever I feel like I don't want to deal with anybody. You're the first person I've ever brought with me."
"What about Lucas?"
"Not even Lucas."
"Why would you need to get away from people?"
"Sometimes having five brothers and sisters can get old." Haley looked at the trees, the leaves were just starting go turn yellow.
"Yeah, sometimes having just one gets old," Nathan muttered.
"What do you mean?"
"Nothing."
"No, really. What?"
"It's just that one of the things that my parents fought about the most was Lucas."
"Is that his fault?"
"Yes."
"I know you're smarter than that, Nathan."
". . . it's not really his fault, it was just easier to blame him. I was just being an asshole."
"Yep."
"Aren't you supposed to disagree with me?"
"Not when you're right."
"Do you have to be so honest all the time?"
"It's just my nature." Haley smiled.
"Yeah. I know."
Haley pulled up in front of Nathan's house.
"Go on, your mom's waiting for you."
Haley left Nathan's side to climb out of the car and Nathan followed her slowly. He looked at his door and then at the ground before looking at her.
"Haley?"
She turned around and saw Nathan standing there cracking his knuckles.
"Yes?"
"I'm sorry."
"For what?"
"The things I said . . . before. I didn't mean it."
Haley sighed. "I know that, Nathan. And I forgive you." Haley's gaze was serious. "But you should know that once you say something you can't take it back. Always remember that, even if you're mad or upset. Because there comes a point when apologies aren't enough anymore. Do you understand?"
"I do." Nathan thought about his parents.
"Good. Now hug me goodbye."
Nathan gave her a relieved smile and squeezed her hard.
"Oof!" Haley groaned. "I think you cracked a few ribs."
They both laughed.
"I'm going to be out of town next week but I'll be back in time for the game on Friday."
"Really?" Nathan said.
"Are you kidding? After you scored twenty-eight pointslast week? I wouldn't miss it."
How is it that she always knew what to say to make him feel better? "How did you know?"
Haley gave him a surprised look. "Just because I'm not around as much as I was doesn't mean I'm not keeping up with what you're doing. I'm Haley James, Heartbreaker."
Nathan smiled. "Yeah, I can't believe I forgot that."