A/N: I'm on a roll! Whoo!

EDIT: The title was a mistake, but I fixed it! It's because that was the first title of the story and then I decided to change it. For some reason I still always call it that... sorry!

Beating Hearts

Chapter 14

Our siblings push buttons that cast us in roles we felt sure we had let go of long ago - the baby, the peacekeeper, the caretaker, the avoider... It doesn't seem to matter how much time has elapsed or how far we've traveled. -- Jane Mersky Leder

TK awoke groggily at the incessant sound of his alarm clock on the bedside table. A mild ray of sunshine was shining through his blinds, but TK closed his eyes against it anyway, sighing and digging his face into his pillow. The beeping continued, but TK found he didn't have the energy to move.

All he had been doing for the past 12 hours was lay in his bed. He was sure he had only been asleep about the last hour or so. The rest of the time had been spent moping and thinking too hard and maybe crying a bit, but he would never admit that.

Moping… about what? His tired brain slowly began to whirr, and it all hit him again with such force he lost his breath for a minute.

His brother.

His girlfriend (sort of).

Just… just what had they done? Kari had said 'kissed', but she seemed so guilty that he couldn't help but think if there had been more, and if there had how far, and why was it that they had kissed and it took Kari seven years to finally give him a little peck, and—

"No," he muttered, throwing a fist against his pillow.

"TK?" The voice startled him. It was his mother talking to him from behind the door. "You awake?"

"Mm," was his noncommittal noise. He so badly just wanted to say he was sick, but he knew that would drive Kari crazy. Well good, she deserves it, he thought, and instantly took back his thoughts. He couldn't help but want to… want to forgive her, to believe there had been a reason, that Kari still wanted to be with TK. He was just too—nice. It was too hard for him to think badly of Kari.

Matt, on the other hand…

TK suddenly sat up in bed. You know, maybe going to school wasn't such a bad idea after all.

Thankfully, Kari cornered Matt in the morning. She saw him walking casually through the front doors, but she ran up and tugged on his collar before he could go any further. Matt jerked back, turning around to see Kari. He gave her a dazzling smile that left her blind for a minute.

"Hey Kari," he greeted cheerfully.

"Matt, I told TK." Kari knew her face was pale, and the words came out through cold lips. She had wanted to call him last night, but Tai had protectively kept the phone in his grasp, waiting for a call from Sora or o Izzy or something. It was like he knew she was going to call Matt. He still hadn't asked her about the night she ran out, though. She sort of thought he had an idea.

He stared at her. "You told him…" He didn't want to acknowledge it, she could tell.

"It was yesterday at lunch, and he grabbed my hand and I got flustered and guilty and I told… him." It all came out in a rush except for the last word.

"Kari." Matt sounded like he was struggling to be calm. "You told him what, exactly?"

"That… That I kissed you." She hated sounding so meek and embarrassed.

"Crap!" Matt shouted out. Kari flinched back, finally looking up at him.

"Well it's not like he's mad at you!" Kari flared back hastily. "You know I can't handle these things and—"

"Then why did you even do it? Why did you even kiss me?" Matt shot back. Kari stared at him.

"Why did I—"

"No, nevermind." Matt sighed heavily, running a hand over his face. "Sorry, I'm just… this is bad. TK doesn't take anything lightly. Kari, I was hoping we could keep it quiet, just a bit longer…"

"But Tai already knows!" Kari argued feebly. "How do we know he hasn't told everyone yet?"

"Because Tai wouldn't do that." Matt's voice was so serious, his face so solid, that Kari was taken aback. Tai? Wouldn't tell anyone? Did Matt even know Tai?

"He's my brother, and I think—"

"He's my best friend, and I think I spend a lot more time with him than you do."

Kari glared up at Matt. "Fine. We can argue about my brother all morning, or we can try to figure out what to do about TK." Pause. "About… this." She swept a hand around them, trying to indicate that she meant the two of them and their strange 'relationship'.

"I don't know what to do any better than you do!" Matt cried, in almost a pleading voice. Kari didn't like that tone. She had been thinking that once she talked to Matt… well, it had just always seemed to her that Matt would know what to do. She should honestly learn from her mistakes.

Besides, she realized, he had kissed her first! Why did he always forget that little detail?

"Look, I think… we should probably… talk to him." It was the thing they had been avoiding for what felt like years. The words weighed heavily on both of them, and they stood in the doorway gloomily for a moment.

"I tried, but all he did was… yell." Kari still remembered TK's unusually harsh words. It was bizarre how everyone around her seemed to be changing so drastically… herself included.

Matt, who was talking loudly to her again, ripped her rather violently away from this train of thought. He didn't seem to care that students could hear their conversation. "Well then I'll talk to him."

Kari shook her head. "You two will only yell at each other," she scolded him. Matt quirked an eyebrow.

"Oh really?"

"Yes."

"Well he doesn't seem too keen on talking to you either."

Kari opened her mouth, but no sound came out. "But I should be there…"

"He might see that as ganging up on him. TK's a—" He stopped.

"Gentle person," Kari supplied quietly. Matt stared at her, but Kari was looking at her shoes so she didn't see the worried expression on his face.

"Is this what you want?" he asked suddenly, abruptly. Kari blinked.

"What?"

"You know… us. Being… together?" Matt didn't really know how to word it. Kari gulped.

"If it works out—yes." Kari knew it was true. Sort of. No, no, she knew! Obviously.

"Well then…" He fell silent. Why do you look so scared? Was what he wanted to ask, but he knew it was a jealous and selfish question. TK was obviously still important to Kari, and his anger would affect a caring person like her deeply. But… argh! Why was Matt looking at this situation like TK wasn't his brother? For the rest of their lives, TK would hate him. Be jealous of him. Loathe him, maybe. Matt shook his head. No, no. He'd sort it out. He had to. Matt knew, without admitting it to himself, that he would never be able to live if TK hated him. It was just a fact of life.

"We'll figure it out," Matt assured her, because even though he didn't know if it was true or not, he knew it was what Kari wanted—no—needed to hear. He spontaneously leaned forward, cupping her cheek with his right hand. It was a move that often sent the girls swooning, but Kari only looked up at him with large eyes, nervous and excited at the same time. He could tell. "Right?"

Kari hesitantly nodded. "Right." She brought one hand up to overlap his, gently and softly, almost as if it wasn't there. He hid a smile, and then quietly withdrew his hand. She let hers fall to her side, expression confused.

"Just don't dwell, Kari. You worry too much, and I don't want you worrying yourself into a fever. Okay?"

"Yes, but sometimes… I just can't help it." She shrugged, her brow creased with worry.

"Nothing's broken yet," he reminded her softly.

"Almost," she warned him.

"But not quite." He affectionately patted her cheek, and Kari had to struggle to hide her embarrassed smile and swatted his hand away.

"I'm not five," she chided him playfully.

"Oh I know," Matt agreed with a smile, but it slowly drifted off. "Trust me, I know." Kari looked as if she was about to reply, but the swarms of students were growing, as the bell was about to ring at any minute. Matt wondered briefly if anyone had seen them being so intimate. Well, so what? He realized now that sooner rather than later they wouldn't be able to hide anymore. Damn. They'd barely had anything to hide, anyway, though. It wasn't like they'd been secretly dating for a year, or anything.

"I've got to go," Kari told him clumsily. Matt nodded.

"Have fun."

"Same to you," she shot back, flashing a smile and walking quickly into the school without a backwards glance. Matt was still smiling until he sat down at his desk and heard two people behind him whispering. Instantly his hearing sharpened, but then he quickly turned away, smothering the need to know if they were talking about him already. It wasn't like he cared. He didn't.

TK went the whole morning with his teeth gritted, hearing the occasional whisper of, "did you see?" or "oh my God, no way were they--!" He desperately blocked them out, not wanting to know the cute couple-ness that Matt and Kari might be up to now that they felt their cumbersome duty of informing him about their relationship was over and done with.

As he walked down the hallway he spotted a familiar head of blonde hair. He gave one last disgruntled sigh through his teeth and caught up to the boy. After all, TK was taller than Matt, and his legs were longer.

"Hello, brother," TK greeted from behind him, struggling to find cheerfulness and in the end just letting it fall flat. Matt stopped, seemed to pause, and then slowly turned around to face TK.

"Hey Teeks," he greeted, using the affectionate pet name that usually softened TK up. Not this time. This time some sort of strange, cool rage was blocking his brain, making him blind.

"So. How're you? I feel like we haven't talked in ages." He let the sarcasm drip from his words, knowing vaguely that he didn't sound like himself. TK could see it on the strange expression Matt had on his face.

"Teeks—"

"No really, why don't you tell me all about your wonderful romantic excursions?" He smiled sweetly, fists clenched at his sides. "Why don't you tell me about all the times you secretly laughed to yourself while I called you with my problems about Kari? Remember how you told me to try and get her, with flowers and apologies and to 'give her a chance' or—or whatever was spouting from your mouth?" He was grim, but his voice was turning hysterical. "Why don't you tell me that, Matt? Huh? Brother?"

Matt winced at the word, as if it were some sort of physical blow. "TK, I promise I'll talk to you, but can we take it somewhere else—outside of the school?" he added. He was still the older brother, and before TK could object and say no, here was fine, Matt had already started walking away. TK knew his trick and shook his head angrily, following him outside of the school anyway and across the quiet street in front of the school.

"Fine, no go ahead," Matt said after a moment of silence. He looked steady; ready for anything TK might throw at him.

But not literally.

TK knew he had gone mad when he felt his fist lifted and swinging, sucker-punching Matt right in the stomach. Matt let out a loud, "oof!" and staggered back, his book bag dropping onto the sidewalk. He held his midriff tightly, crouched over, breathing quietly. TK stood straighter, staring at his fist in horror. What had that been?

"Okay, I sort of deserved that," Matt finally muttered, standing straight and making a grimace. TK glared at him.

"'Sort of?'" It was a different sort of power pulsing through TK know. He knew he had the strength to beat up Matt, or maybe Matt wasn't trying to defend himself, but it didn't matter! TK didn't care anymore, but instead readied his fist at his side again; just in case.

"Okay, a lot," Matt conceded, his tone no longer light. He stared at TK, the first time he looked his brother in the eye directly for what seemed like months. Maybe it had been months. "You never gave her a chance to explain."

TK felt his face heat up with embarrassment. "I didn't want to talk about it!" he cried desperately. "I didn't want to hear about how you two grew close, and I was being forgotten, or about how you guys knew you were meant for each and poor, stupid TK didn't have any place in your lives anymore!" His voice broke on the last word, and he stepped back, hating himself for feeling embarrassed for saying what he had been thinking about all night. It was true. He was being forgotten, and TK knew that was the thing that hurt the most.

"TK…" Matt began, his face confused.

"Oh don't say that," TK spat out darkly, looking at the sidewalk. He didn't want to hear the obvious pity in his brother's voice. "Don't say it's not like that at all."

There was a silence, and TK expected Matt to walk over to him or something. Glancing up, he saw his brother standing warily as far away as before. "But… it isn't," he told him helplessly, but his face was hard.

"Then what is it, exactly?" TK asked. "Oh it's a very healthy relationship you two have, making each other jealous with your toys." I'm one of them, TK thought miserably. And he was slowly breaking.

"TK," Matt said again, this time in a warning tone. "It's more complicated than that."

"Complicated?" TK let out a bark of laughter. "Of course it's complicated! She's younger than you, you're graduating, and your little brother is in love with her! Of COURSE it's going to be complicated!" TK was glaring at him again now, struggling to put his feelings into words but knowing that all that came out was anger. "So why are you even doing this? Is it worth it?"

Matt stared at him. TK knew he was thinking. He also knew Matt wasn't one for commitment or relationships, which is why his next words shocked him. "Yea, I guess it is." He shrugged nonchalantly, but all TK could do was stare uselessly at him.

"Look, Teeks, I don't know how I can possibly explain this to you." Matt held his hands out in a confused gesture, shaking his head. "I mean, no matter what, you're going to hate me, aren't you?"

TK stared at his brother and knew that Matt had always been his pillar. Sure, maybe a rather unsteady one, but a pillar all the same. But now, how was he supposed to talk to him knowing that he had just kissed Kari, or that Kari was thinking of him, or what if they got married, or had kids, or—

"I don't know." TK was staring at his shoes again, suddenly at a loss. "Matt, how could you do this to me?" he asked weakly, and suddenly it was just the two of them. The people walking by curiously were forgotten, and it was little TK asking his older brother for help, to hold his hand and to tell him it was okay, he was sorry, it wouldn't happen again.

Matt hesitated, and then took a step closer. "You don't know how much it's been killing me, TK. It's the hardest thing I've ever lived through. I don't want you gone." His voice was sincere, but TK had a hard time believing it.

"Then just stop." TK's voice was soft. "Please." He didn't care if he was begging. He didn't care that Kari had probably fallen out of love with him ages ago. He just wanted her back.

"I can't." Matt's voice was firm.

TK straightened up. The moment was gone. "Fine."

"Fine."

"I don't want to talk about it anymore."

"TK, please don't shut us out—"

"Us? Oh, this is nice. Now you're even speaking FOR her! Brilliant!" TK let out a quiet chuckle. "Lovely. Just great." He turned around and glanced across the road before jogging back to the school. As much as he resisted the idea of going back in, he was diligent student.

"Teeks—"

But TK had already blocked out his brother's voice, Matt's words pounding in his ears and suddenly TK realized his first kiss had been false.

"What did he say?"

"He's not exactly okay with it." Matt's dry voice made Kari anxious.

"Matt, please, be serious or I'll have to find him myself, and I don't really—"

"He walked away from me." Matt's voice was dark, his words blunt. Kari nearly stopped walking, but managed to keep her step up. The two of them were walking home, and Kari had decided to try discussing TK once more. She knew it was a horrible way to start out a relationship—courting—dating—thing—but she needed it to be done. Kari knew that was an awful way to look at it, but…

"What?"

Matt had his hands in his pockets; his book bag slung carelessly over one shoulder. The two of them were shoved to the side on the sidewalk, trying to avoid the busy crowds to have a decent conversation. "I tried talking to him, and he said—he said some things, and then he just walked away. There was no way I could make him agree with us, and I completely understand him." Matt's voice was earnest, but his shoulders were slouched in a dejected manner. Kari looked over at him worriedly. She was dying to know what he had said, but Matt was going through some deep thoughts at the moment.

Kari couldn't wait long, though. "So… what did he say, really?"

Matt let out a breath through his nose, gathering his thoughts. "Oh you know, the usual… that it was ludicrous, we were being stupid, we hurt him… he thinks we're forgetting him." The last words were soft, and Kari could barely hear them over the mulling crowd… but she understood.

"Oh Matt, I'm sorry. It's all my fault that things between you and TK are so messed up right now, and I don't know how to make it better." Her voice wobbled, so she took a deep breath to steady it.

"It's not, Kari, don't worry." But Matt wouldn't look at her face, only ahead, and Kari didn't like that. She knew he must harbour some sort of frustration at her, and that made her nervous. "What about you and Tai?" Matt finally asked. "That must be sort of… odd."

"Oh. Tai." Kari pondered his words, wondering if he was going to jump to his friend's defence like he had earlier that day. "We haven't really talked since he shoved the phone in my face." Kari had (rather shyly) explained to Matt why she had called him that day several days ago. Instead of being annoyed or disappointed, he had only laughed.

"I think you should talk to him." Matt finally cast a glance at her, and Kari nodded dutifully.

"Yea, it's just… weird."

"Well, he can't hate you as much as TK hates me."

Kari winced at his words, but kept going. "I don't know… Tai's your number one fan, Matt."

Matt managed a smile and reached out a hand, almost as if to ruffle her hair. Kari twitched in anticipation, but he shocked her when all he did was run a hand through it. She nearly tripped over her own feet, but Matt was still walking and so Kari struggled to keep going. If he wasn't affected, neither was she. Fine.

"It's like the rest of our time is going to be spent running around, trying to fix things with these guys," Kari suddenly spurted, nibbling anxiously on her thumbnail. "Don't you think?"

Matt nodded slowly. "Yea…" And everyone else. But Kari knew she could deal with everyone else. But Tai and TK were two of the most important guys people in her life, and—well—it was going to be hard.

"Will we ever be able to enjoy this?" Kari asked more quietly, half-hoping Matt wouldn't hear her.

He did.

At her words he pulled her close, finally stopping their fast-paced walk. Kari's breathing hitched as he wrapped an arm around her shoulders and half-lifted her so he could kiss her deeply on the lips. Kari responded immediately, and it was great and everything, but before she could really get used to it (after all, she'd only kissed a couple of times and it was sort of new to her) he pulled away slowly.

"Maaatt-" she began in a whining tone.

"I think we'll still be able to enjoy it," he whispered, interrupting her, and suddenly his point was proven and Kari broke into a fit of giggles. Even Matt cracked a smile.

"Tai?" Kari knocked softly on his door. There was silence, as she had been expecting. His greeting hadn't been all that kind when she'd walked in. He had been in the entryway, just taking off his shoes when he heard her. Tai had given her a startled deer in the headlights look, and then casually finished taking off his shoes. Just as Kari had been about to say something he had only walked away, down the hall, and slammed his door shut.

Great.

"Tai?" Kari repeated, knocking a second time. "C'mon, Tai, why're you ignoring me?"

Silence.

"If I remember, you're the one who gave me the phone, and I don't apprecia—"

"Kari? What are you doing?"

Kari jumped and spun around to see Tai standing in front of her, munching on a handful of chips. He was staring at her curiously.

"Wha—What? But Tai, you went to your room…" Kari said feebly. Hadn't he?

"No I didn't. I went to the bathroom. Then to the kitchen." Tai pointed to the door down the hall, where Kari hadn't noticed he'd probably emerged and headed to the kitchen.

"Oh… I thought you had been ignoring me or something…" Kari let out a nervous laugh. "That was stupid of me…"

"Was it?" Tai slid past her and opened his door. Kari grabbed the handle just before he managed to shut it.

"Tai, come on!" Kari cried, anger leaking into her words. "Would you listen?"

"Oh, but I already know what you're going to say." Tai turned around, popping in a chip and munching on it before adding to his statement. "You're going to say that just because you two are 'together' doesn't mean Matt will ignore me when he comes over. It doesn't mean that when you guys get in arguments I'll be expected to take sides, no, don't worry!" He flopped down on his bed, shoving off soccer equipment before laying his head down on the pillow, staring at the ceiling and chewing on the last of his chips. "Don't worry about it, Kari. I'm expecting it all." He made a wide gesture with his arms to the ceiling, as if ready to embrace it, preparing himself. Kari grimaced.

"Well… that's not fair," she muttered, opening his door a bit wider and squeezing inside. She wrinkled her nose. It smelled like sweat and old food. She daintily sat on the foot of his bed, moving his foot over so she had some room on the rumpled blue sheets. "Why did you tell me to call him then?"

Tai let out a loud, dramatic sigh. "Because—I dunno—I thought it'd be better if you two just got it over with already, instead of trying to figure it out separately. Teamwork is always better." He closed his eyes, and Kari took this chance to smile before struggling to keep it down. She could tell Tai wasn't exactly comfortable with this, but at least he had somewhat good intentions.

"I'm sorry I'm not dating TK," she whispered.

"Yea, well, it's not like I can tell you what to do or anything." His eyes were still closed. Kari didn't understand why her brother was being so… so good about this!

"You don't hate me then?" Kari asked in a hushed whisper, and she couldn't help but nearly start crying at her question. She hastily rubbed away tears, but she wasn't fast enough. Tai had sat up, resting on his elbows, giving her a confused look.

"Kari, I don't hate you."

"Oh, I know! It's just, I thought you would, and it's hard enough with TK, and…" She sniffed and shrugged, rubbing at her other eye. "I don't think I could handle you hating me."

"Kari, Kari, Kari," TK reprimanded in his theatrical way, scooting over so he sat beside her, legs swung over the side of the bed. He tugged her closer with an arm over her shoulders and gave her half of a hug. Kari sniffed again and felt relief lightening the weight on her shoulders. "I'm your brother, it's like, forbidden in my DNA to hate you or something." He paused. "Although this whole situation could be… uh… better, per say, I'm not going to get angry with you for it. At least it's resolved, and you two aren't just… floating around, or whatever."

Kari giggled and pulled away slightly to look up at Tai's face. "Do you even know what you're talking about anymore?"

Tai shrugged, grinning. "Sort of. Not really."

"I don't say it much, but… you're a great brother. Thanks, Tai." Kari wasn't ashamed or embarrassed at her words. It was true. Although Tai had freaked out at her the night of the phone call, he had had good reason. Somehow he had pieced it all together, and had been mulling over it for who knew how long. He seemed to have relaxed since the snapping moment in which he had yelled at Kari in the hall.

"Glad to be of service. But… Kari…" He fell silent.

Kari poked him in the ribs. "What?"

"Just… Don't hurt him, okay?"

Kari pulled away completely now, staring at Tai in shock. "Huh?"

Tai looked away uncomfortably. "Matt doesn't look it, but he's sort of sensitive, especially where his ego is concerned. I can tell this is something new for him, so just don't hurt him," he repeated, flickering a glance over at Kari, almost nervously.

"Uh. I wasn't planning on it?" Kari replied, almost as a question.

"Oh. Okay. Good." Tai stood up suddenly. "Want to go buy some food?" he asked suddenly. Kari jumped at his words. It wasn't often the two of them went out in public together anymore. Somehow, had this whole Matt thing… brought them closer?

Ridiculous. Kari nodded and stood up. "Sure! Just let me grab some stuff from my room."

Tai rolled his eyes to the ceiling. "Women."

"Yes, women," Kari agreed with a smile and pushed him out of his bedroom with a shove in his back. "I'll only be a few minutes!"

As Kari wandered into her bedroom to the music of Tai's mutters down the hallway, she wondered briefly if she should call Matt and tell her how successful the meeting had been with Tai. But then she thought again, and realized that Matt might be trying to sort things out with TK. She'd call him later that night, she decided. Right now was brother and sister bonding time.

If only she'd called him. If only she had made the time to give that two-second phone call… maybe things would have gone differently… or at least a lot more smoothly.