Disclaimer: Harry Potter…if only he was mine…but sadly…he isn't…

A/N: Thank you! Thank you for all that's reviewed! Thanks to siriusfanatica, Kathy, xo-draco-ox and jkg-vader! You guys really gave me encouragement! Thanks! If there are those who reviewed but aren't mentioned, I'm sorry! Maybe you'll be mentioned the next chapter!

And I Hate Myself for Hating You

January 27th 2005

Hermione Granger

"Thanks, I had a great night," I said to Malfoy, smiling slightly.

We had just finished dinner and Malfoy had managed to get me to my room, thankfully alive. I opened the door and looked at him.

"Me too," Malfoy said as he pulled me into a hug.

I never felt so safe and protected. Malfoy's touch was so comfortable. Our hands seemed to be a perfect fit. I never want to let go. But sadly, I pulled away and closed the door; blocking Malfoy from my view before tears started to fall from my eyes.

5 years ago, Malfoy and I had dated for quite some time. I couldn't think of a time I was happier. Everything was fine until Malfoy told me the truth. He dated me only for a challenge. Then, just like that, he turned his back on me. I heart broke beyond repair.

How can I let him enter my heart again? When it wasn't even whole to start with! I thought furiously.

I lay there, hugging my knees and crying behind that door.Memories of us together started passing through my mind.I didn't even realize it was already morning. I loved taking showers in the morning so I decided to get myself purified. I spread shampoo in my hair, followed by conditioner. I was just starting on shower-gel until there was a knowck on the door. I choose to ignore it but the knocking continued. I let out a frustrated groan and wrapped a towel around me. It was that blasted Malfoy at the door. Well, I'm not really a morning person.

"What Malfoy?" I asked coolly.

"Uh, bad timing?" Malfoy asked.

"I'm lathered in soap for Christ's sake!" I shouted at him.

"Meet you by the pool in the 5th story? Say, 20 minutes," Malfoy asked me.

"Whatever," I said angrily and slammed the door at his face

"Granger!" a voice that's starting to get on my nerves rang in my ears.

"What Malfoy?" I said loudly.

"Where were you?" Malfoy asked. He seemed to be panting due to running.

"In my room," I answered shortly.

"You're aware that you're supposed to meet me by the pool half hour ago?" Malfoy asked again.

"Yes," I replied.

"And?" Malfoy said, searching for an answer.

"I thought of it for a while. I don't see a reason we have to meet," I said, getting annoyed.

"I thought we were fine," Malfoy snapped.

"You just took me out for dinner," I shot back at him.

"Can we just go somewhere private?" Malfoy suggested.

I sighed and punched the lift button signaling 'up'.

Why do I have to be at the lobby? WHY? I thought angrily.

We reached the pool.

"Now, what you wanted to say to me?" I asked Malfoy angrily.

"What is it in me that make you hate me?" Malfoy said, glaring at me.

"Everything!" I yelled at once.

Malfoy reached his limit. He was staring at me.

"I hate everything about you! I hate the fact that you left me! I hate you for ignoring me! I hate you for treating me like trash! I hate you! Do you hear me? I HATE YOU! And I hate myself for loving you and hating you at the same time," I said quietly; hoping he didn't catch the last bit.

Tears started falling. It took a lot of me to say that; true, I hated him but I loved him too. Those words hurt me badly.

"Guess what Mudblood? I HATE YOU TOO!" Malfoy yelled back at me.

"Fine! Now we're even!" I screamed.

"You mean nothing to me! And you know what amuses me?" Malfoy asked as he reached for the door.

"The fact that I broke your heart!" Malfoy finished before leaving the poolside.

And for the millionth time that week, tears started falling.

I didn't leave my room for 2 weeks. I ordered Room Service every time I'm hungry. Malfoy never disturbed me but I still stayed at that room. I just stayed there and cried over my life and stuff. The room was a mess. Coke cans were laying everywhere. My junk clothing was collected into a pile. The dishes weren't touched. The bed wasn't made. The whole room stinks. I thought of it for a while; Icame here for a holiday, not to sleep. I booked a place for me from the hotel tour services. This time, I made sure Malfoy wasn't in the list.

I stepped out of the hotel, inhaling a large amount of fresh air for the first time in weeks. I boarded the bus along with a few others. Most of the people in the tour were old, married couples. I took sometime adjusting to the sounds of coughing, inhaling and exhaling, blowing of the nose and who knows what else. Italy was amazing. The history that lies in every building amazes me. The scenery was also beautiful. I visited a theatre, a museum, arts gallery and flea market. It was something I could've never imagined. I ended up buying something from almost every place I visited. I read about Italy's history before and I was blown away by the history beneath every wall.

I was smiling when I entered my room. But the smile quickly faded when I realize I wasn't alone in the room. Ron was there.

"Hermione, where have you been?" Ron asked.

"R-Ron, w-what are doing here?" I staggered.

"I just missed you. Have you missed me?" Ron asked sweetly, yet devilish.

"No," I answered, firm and tough.

"Not yet," Ron said angrily.

He grabbed me by my shoulder and slammed me on the couch. My head hit the end table and I fainted in an instant.

A/N: Am I just so evil? Hehe…I know it's a cliffhanger but Hermione fainted and there's no way she can still think right? What do you think? Review please! And in this story, Ron kinda like have two minds, one evil and one nice. But in the end he died. Why? Just keep reading! Oh, I'm in Asia but not in China...I went there like twice and I loved the scenery but I hate the hygine rate! Jkg-vader I think your parents will love China but complaint about the hygine there, trust me...Oh! My cousin is there...her dad wanted to show them some famous scenery in China bcoz that place is dying due to promotion or something like that...Anyway! Why am I talking bout China! Review! I love you guys!

Love

Ashley