Jack was sitting to his left and Mike was to his right. The chair across from Nick was yet to be occupied, but that would change soon. They were in a very nice restaurant, one that Nick would never even think of going to because he wasn't a fan of elegant meals that cost way too much for the little amount of food they gave you. But here he was, sitting there despite the fact that he didn't want to be, all because Jack and Mike had talked him into it and Grissom and Brass had urged him to as well. Nick had been staring at his glass of water when he saw the chair from across the table be pulled back before it was filled by the last person in their party. Nick looked up hesitantly, not especially wanting to but not being able to help it either.
James Sparazza was looking across the table at Nick, smiling slightly. "I'm sorry I'm late," he apologized to everyone, but kept his eyes on Nick. "I got caught up in some business that needed to be taken care of."
Jack shrugged slightly. "Not a problem at all. We weren't waiting long."
James' smile widened. "Good. Now the waiter told me it was very busy tonight, but I told him not to worry about it because I have something more important to do tonight other than eating," he said, still looking at Nick. "I have to catch up about the last thirty years of my youngest son's life."
Nick felt compelled to speak then before something sarcastic came to mind. "There's not much to know," he said.
James poured himself a glass of water. "Jack here seems to be very impressed with you from what he's told us about you, and Mikey said he had a very good time with you the other night. But I'm glad to see that you're so modest, something I'm sure you get from me."
Nick just stared at the man sitting across from him in almost disbelief. He couldn't believe that this was actually happening. He was sitting with James Sparazza, the biggest mob boss in the country. Actually, he was the mob boss. Everyone else worked for him. Everyone in the country knew he was a criminal and the most dangerous man that has been around in a long time. But Nick couldn't see that in him, and he didn't know why. He didn't see the criminal most other people would be afraid of if they saw him in public, let alone sat at the same table as him. Nick couldn't believe that he was actually sitting across from his real father, a man he hadn't spoken to in thirty years, but still his father.
James continued speaking when he realized no one else had anything else to add. "Now Nick, I know that there's a lot of things that have been said about me, and I know you're not stupid and I can't tell you that they're not true. But what I can tell you is that no matter what your other family tells you about us, we do love you. You are apart of our family in our hearts, even if you haven't been physically for the last thirty years. Don't believe what they tell you."
"They still don't know that I know," Nick replied. "Even if they did, they wouldn't lie to me about anything."
James shook his head. "You don't know that. They've lied to you about this for thirty years. They could have lied to you about anything else as well. They can't be trusted."
"No, you can't be trusted," Nick said. "I don't even know you other than what I've seen and heard from the news, and they don't exactly make you out to be a saint."
"I knew you'd react this way," James said calmly. "I understand that you don't trust me. I don't blame you. But I can prove to you that you can trust me. I never wanted to lose you in the first place Nick, and now I have to get you back and I'll do whatever I have to. You're my son."
"I know," Nick said weakly.
James frowned slightly. "What, do you wish you weren't?"
"No," Nick said, even though he still wasn't sure. "That's not what I meant."
"What do you mean?" James asked.
"Come on dad," Mike chimed in, "give him a break."
James held up his hand to silence his eldest son. "He's a grown man Mikey, he can answer a simple question."
Nick's previous nervousness and the slight fear he had had was now totally gone. He felt like he was being tricked or something and intimidated, by his own father. Even though they had pretty much just met, Nick felt like his father was trying to make up for lost time in one sentence and get him to say something stupid. But Nick was just going to be himself and not care what was going to happen. He doubted that after all these years his father was planning to hurt him or something, and if he was, then Nick would deal with that when the time came. But right now, he wasn't going to be scared by a stupid question.
"What I meant was I know that I'm your son, I fully understand that. But that doesn't mean that I have to trust you over the people who actually raised me. They lied to me because they had to, not because they wanted to or even enjoyed it. I know I'm your son and I've always been, but why does that all of a sudden change now, thirty years later? Just because you felt like it?"
James was slightly taken back by Nick's confidence and by the fact that he didn't seem afraid of such a powerful man. But that didn't keep him from replying as quick as he ever would.
"You don't have kids, so you don't fully understand," James said. "I had to go thirty years without being able to see or speak with my youngest son. No offense to Mikey at all, I love him just as much, but it still hurts knowing there's someone out there in your family that you just can't have anything to do with."
"That's your fault, not mine," Nick said.
"It's your mother's fault," James retorted.
Jack took this moment to jump in. "It was my fault. Things were getting complicated and messy, and I wanted Nicky out of there before anything bad happened to him."
James acted like Jack had never spoken. His eyes were still on Nick as he said, "Don't you for one second make the mistake of thinking that it didn't kill me to lose you."
"This is a two way thing," Nick said right back. "Who I thought were my parents aren't. My real dad is the biggest mob boss ever. That's not exactly easy to handle. I have no idea what to think about any of this, never mind what to do."
James shrugged. "Who says you have to? There doesn't have to be any thinking or any of that nonsense involved. Did you have to to think about every little thing with your other family?"
"No," Nick said simply, forcing himself not to say anything sarcastic or even mean.
"Then why do you have to now?"
"Because this is different. I'm thirty-six-years-old, and I just met my real brother and father that everyone in the country knows," Nick said with a sarcastic laugh.
James nodded slightly. "Don't worry, this'll all be sorted out soon enough and there won't be anything to think about Nick."
Nick had fallen asleep almost as soon as he had gotten into his bed. His mind was racing, and he had thought it was going to keep him up, but he was so exhausted that even the thousands of thoughts flying through his mind couldn't keep him up. His room was nice and dark and his warm bed was so inviting that it wasn't long before he was sound asleep.
But it didn't stay that way for long. Nick had a weird dream about Jason, his 'real' brother for the last thirty years. Jason had found out that Nick was really a Sparazza and refused to talk to him, even though they had been extremely close for as long as Nick could remember. In Nick's dream, after Jason stopped talking to him, his entire life seemed to be completely changed and borderline ruined because he was a Sparazza.
Nick awoke with a start, but not because of his dream. He had gotten the eerie feeling that someone was watching him, one that had haunted him even since the Nigel Crane incident. He sat straight up and couldn't breathe at first, but then he ran his hand through his hair several times and he calmed down, catching his breath. He was just about to settle back down into his bed when he was interrupted.
"Did I wake you?" A voice said from Nick's left, somewhere in the darkness.
Nick jumped so high he almost fell off the bed. His heart immdiately started pounding against his chest at a terrifying rate. He could hear it racing in his ears and felt his stomach jump up to his throat. He snapped his head to the left and stared into the dark until his eyes adjusted to the darkness and he saw the figure sitting in the chair near the window on the far wall.
James Sparazza flicked on the light on the table next to the chair, dimly lighting the room. He was looking at Nick with a blank expression. Nick, on the other hand, was as white as a ghost and was absolutely scared out of his mind. He was extremely tired, had no idea what was going on, and could no longer control his heart breat or breathing. Not a good start to this new situation.
"I'm sorry to be an intruder, but I think we got off on the wrong foot at diner tonight," James continued.
Nick tried to swallow his heartbeat. "So you broke into my house and watched me sleep?"
James shrugged lamely. "I didn't want to wait and forget what I want to say to you. I think having Jack and Mikey there made you more comfortable, but what we really need is a face to face, like this."
Nick was slowly calming down. "What else do you want to say to me?"
"I want you to be able to trust me, so I think there's a few things you should know." Nick didn't say anything, so James just went on. "I know you don't think I care about you, but I do, even though you probably think Sam Braun gave that money to Catherine because she's his daughter."
Nick was stunned at that statement. "What are you talking about?"
"When you were kidnapped, Sam Braun gave Catherine that money because he knew you were my son and I couldn't get back in time to pay it myself. If it had been anyone else, he wouldn't have done it. He just made it look like it was because Catherine needed it."
"That money did nothing," Nick said, not knowing what else to say.
"I still tried to save you. Besides that, why do you think Gedda backed off of Warrick?"
Nick was having trouble making sense of this. "Because-"
James cut him off. "Because I told him to knock it off. Gedda's a wannabe who kills the occassional trouble maker to feel tough. When he started screwing with Warrick, I ended that real quick before he got any stupid ideas."
"Why?"
"Because he's your best friend, and you're my son," James replied. "So I may not have been around for your whole life, but I still care. I still love you Nicky."