Chapter 5

They saw each other off an on throughout the rest of the summer and fall – at mission briefings, office meetings and the like. Jaime tried not to let Oscar's rebuff affect their relationship. She knew what was behind it, and she didn't want him to feel uncomfortable around her. So she tried mightily to maintain a casual friendship, though she had to admit to herself, it was a bit more distant than it had been in the past. She consciously tried to avoid lingering embraces, long lunches and daydreams about him. As much as she wanted to be supportive, she had her own heart to worry about as well. The longing she had to be with him just wouldn't subside, and there was no prospect in the near future to give her hope that their relationship would develop any further than it had.

Finally Jaime's semester was over for Christmas vacation, and she was able to once again fly out to Washington. The OSI Christmas party was that night, and she was looking forward to going. Most of the agents that weren't out on missions would be there – even Steve would make it in. She caught an early flight out of Los Angeles so she would have a chance to check in, shower and change before heading over to the party. It was a black tie affair, and Jaime had chosen a stunning cobalt blue dress for the evening - a floor length, off the shoulder soft taffeta dress, fitted to the hips, with a tapered skirt. She curled her hair, then swept it up into a loose knot on the back of her head, using a jeweled comb to hold her hair in place. She had forgotten to bring a necklace, so her neckline was unadorned, but she did have a pair of lovely drop diamond earrings.

Jaime had secretly hoped Oscar would call her and offer to drive her over, since she had hinted as much the last time she spoke to him. Just then, the phone in her hotel rang. Her stomach began to swirl with excitement as she rushed to the phone. "Hello?" she said in a deep, sexy voice. It must be Oscar. She was wrong.

"Hi-ya sweetheart…you must have been expecting me." It was Steve.

"Oh, Steve. Yeah, I heard you were coming. Where are you?" She was glad to hear from Steve. She missed getting to see him, and even though her feelings for him were no longer romantic, she treasured his friendship all the same.

"I'm two floors below you. I was wondering if you'd like to go over together. I rented a car, since I'm gonna be in town a while this time."

Jaime's heart sank. She really was hoping to hear from Oscar, but it was 7:00, and the party started at 8:00. Without an excuse to say no, she took a deep breath and tried to sound convincing. "Sure Steve, I'd love to go over together. What time did you want to come by?"

"How about now? If you're ready. I thought maybe we could stop down by the bar for a drink before we go." Steve knew Jaime didn't remember her feelings for him, but he certainly remembered his feelings for her – and they hadn't changed. He was still madly in love with her. Even though he didn't hold out much hope, he figured it was better to be in her life as a friend than to not be in it at all.

"How about if you come by in 20 minutes - just so I can touch up?"

"Alright, but if I know you, you're gorgeous already."

Jaime hung up the phone, and got her finishing touches ready. Rarely did she wear makeup, but tonight, she splurged with some sultry eye shadow and lip gloss, already accentuating her beautiful features. She tossed a comb and the lip gloss in a gold beaded purse and grabbed her wrap for the evening. It was a shimmery blue and gold gauzy fabric with a blue velvet backing. She had just slid it onto her shoulders, fastening the clasp in the front when there was a knock on her door.

"Wow, you look great" Steve cried, his jaw almost dropping to the floor. It had been awhile since he had seen Jaime last, but it didn't seem that she looked this good.

Jaime blushed slightly at his praise. "You look pretty snazzy yourself Austin. Shall we go?"

As they took the elevator down to the lobby bar, the phone in Jaime's room rang, but even with her bionic hearing, she couldn't hear the call she had been waiting for.

Jaime and Steve made up for lost time, chatting and laughing easily before they left for the party at the St. Regis hotel. Jaime felt like she walking into a palace. The lights inside lit up the windows like they were gleaming gold, their graceful arches dancing with flickering light from inside. They were escorted into the Astor Ballroom, which was adorned with soft, white lights glittering like jewels from the crystal chandeliers and bouncing off the floor to ceiling glass doors which led to the Astor terrace. The music was already playing, couples and friends already out on the dance floor. Steve grabbed two glasses of champagne from a waiter with a silver tray in his hand.

"Here you go my lady…" He made a sweeping bow as he handed her the glass. Jaime giggled at his impersonation. She was having a wonderful time. The last few months had been hard – between missions, teaching, and struggling with her emotions for Oscar. It was nice to just relax and have fun. She couldn't help looking around for Oscar though. He would have to be there - he was the Director after all. She spotted Rudy walk in, and hurried over to greet him.

"Jaime! Wow – you look…great." Rudy couldn't help but be impressed that his surrogate daughter was easily the most beautiful woman in the room. He kissed her lightly on the cheek and looked into her searching eyes. "If I was a jealous man, I think I'd be offended right about now," he joked with her. "Don't worry honey, he'll be here. We got caught in the office as we were trying to leave. He's on his way over - I promise."

Jaime was getting ready to protest that she wasn't looking for Oscar, but she knew better than to try to fool Rudy. "How do you do it Rudy – am I that obvious?" She sighed a little as she wrapped her arms around him, resting her chin on his shoulder. "How about a dance?" she said hopefully.

Rudy took her by the hand out onto the dance floor. It was a lively number, and they laughed as they watched their fellow co-workers showing off their "fancy" footwork. The next song was a slow one, and Rudy took Jaime into his arms, letting her head rest comfortably on his shoulder. He could feel the tension in her body as they moved together, and he suspected he knew the cause. "Oscar still hasn't told you - has he?"

Jaime lifted her head up to meet his eyes. "No, and I've tried, honestly Rudy I've tried. But that man is bottled up so tight, it's a wonder he doesn't explode. I really thought I was getting through to him last summer, but he just…."

"Jaime, I told you it would be difficult to break through to him. That's why I thought you should know in the first place. I didn't want you thinking he didn't care about you. He needs you Jaime, more than you can possibly imagine. Be patient honey."

Usually it was fairly chilly in D.C. at Christmas, but tonight it was still in the 50's. After her dance with Rudy, Jaime grabbed her wrap, pulled it close against her shoulders and walked out to the terrace to look at the fountain. It was absolutely beautiful, and she could see the White House off in the distance. She could still hear the music from inside, though it was muffled by the glass doors and the water babbling from the fountain. Mesmerized by the fountain, she didn't hear the footsteps quietly approaching her from behind. She felt a hand slide around her waist and another one firmly caressing her shoulder through the fabric of her wrap, a soft, tender kiss planted on her cheek. She could feel the warmth of his breath on her skin, see the vapor hanging in the cool night air, reflected in the lights twinkling around the terrace.

Jaime turned to see him, though she recognized him by the electric thrill shooting through her body at his smell, his touch, his presence. "Oscar…you finally decided to show up," she teased.

"I'm sorry babe, I got tied up in a meeting – honest. Rudy too. "

"I know, I'm just teasing. I just saw Rudy. He told me you'd be right over. You look great by the way – very handsome." She rubbed her hands lightly up and down the lapels of his tuxedo, trying to control the urges building inside her. His presence was intoxicating, his chest barely touching hers, his arm still resting lightly on her waist.

"Well, you look pretty…stunning….yourself. But I think….there's something missing. Maybe this will do the trick." Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out a long, gold box with a dark red bow on it, and placed it in her hand. "Merry Christmas babe. I wanted to stop by and give it to you earlier, but when I called your room there was no answer."

Jaime's hands trembled slightly as she removed the lid to the box. Inside was a gold serpentine necklace with an exquisite sapphire and diamond heart pendant. She was stunned, her mouthing gaping slightly at the extremely expensive, extremely personal, extremely romantic gift. She gingerly lifted the necklace out of its box, running it carefully through her fingers. "Oscar, I don't know what to say…"

"You don't have to say anything." He took it from her hands, and leaned into her a bit, draped it against her chest, gently brushing some stray hairs from her throat so he could fasten the clasp behind her neck. "It looks great on you babe." He rested his hands slightly on her shoulders as he stood back to admire it on her. "I know that things between us aren't the way you'd like them to be, but I want you to know how special you are to me." He could see her getting ready to protest, but he gently put his fingers to her lips. "Shhh…let me finish. There's something I'd like to talk to you about – but not here. What time is your flight back tomorrow?"

After much soul searching, Oscar had finally decided that it was time to tell Jaime the truth about his past. While he still couldn't allow himself to entertain the idea of actually having a relationship with her, he felt he owed her an explanation. He found that it was becoming increasingly difficult to resist her. Each time he saw her, he thought of that night, months ago, when he had devoured not only the berry she held in her lips. A smile would cross his face as he allowed himself the guilty pleasure of a happy memory.

It was obvious to Oscar that Jaime cared for him more deeply that he had previously thought, and he couldn't bear for her to think he didn't return those feelings. She seemed to now be keeping her distance from him, and he suspected it was because of his rebuff the night of their dinner. For the last several months he had tried to talk to her about it, but he had chickened out each time. What he couldn't figure out was why he had chickened out. Was it because he thought she would be angry with him for keeping it from her all these years? Maybe it was because he wouldn't be able to handle the look of pity in her eyes. It certainly couldn't be because he was afraid that it might change their relationship, and that she might not look at him with the same desire, embrace him with the same longing, touch him with the same sensuality that he secretly craved...could it?.

"I'm not going back home. Jim and Helen were going to fly out here tomorrow to see Steve for Christmas, so I figured I'd stay here with them. Why, what did you have in mind?" She could feel her heart racing with anticipation.

"Well, I was having some people over to my house for a little Christmas Eve get together. I was wondering if you'd like to come over earlier and have lunch, so we could… talk." His dark eyes were smoldering, and Jaime felt like she could drown in their depths.

She stepped into his embrace, throwing her arms around his neck and kissing him lightly on the lips. "I'd love to. How about if I come by around noon? Are you cooking?" She shot him a playful look, wondering if Oscar could actually even work a stove.

He grinned – Jaime knew him pretty well. "I order really well from the caterer. Hey, these are my friends, and I'd like them to stay that way." He noticed Jaime was starting to shiver. He put his arm around her. "You wanna go in? I'm not a half bad dancer."

Jaime hadn't realized how cold she was getting, and the thought of dancing in Oscar's arms warmed her to the core. "Sure would." They walked in together, Jaime's new gift glittering brightly in the lights of the ballroom. The music was soft and slow, and Oscar gathered her in his arms, grateful that he could hold her the way he longed to – it was a slow dance after all. She was so lithe and graceful, it was if their bodies had melted together and were one form, gliding effortlessly and gracefully across the floor. He reveled in how her lips brushed against his cheek, tickling his ear when she murmured something to him. Her dress was cut low in the back, so his hands rested on her warm skin, caressing her back ever so slightly as he spun and dipped her. Oscar felt a little guilty for sending her somewhat mixed messages, but maybe she would understand tomorrow.

As the song finished, they were both reluctant to leave the dance floor, but Steve had been looking for Jaime and just spotted her. He made his way over and tapped her on the shoulder. "Hey pretty lady, can I have this next dance?" As she turned, he saw the necklace, and a slightly embarrassed look on Jaime's face as her eyes darted from Steve to Oscar and back to Steve. It took him a second to realize who had given her the gift, and he suddenly felt like an intruder.

Jaime quickly averted any further awkwardness by taking Steve's hand. "Sure can. Are you up to me tonight?"

Oscar quickly added, "Steve, I'm having a party at my house tomorrow around 7:00 – would you like to come? Bring Jim and Helen if they're in." Oscar knew Steve still had feelings for Jaime, and he felt a little uneasy at Steve having seen them dancing so closely. He didn't want to lose Steve as a friend.

Steve grinned. "Are you cooking?"

Oscar just laughed. "What's this a conspiracy? Neither of you seems to have much faith in me. And no, by the way I'm not – so will I see you there?"

"Sure. Thanks Oscar." Steve smiled, and led Jaime out to dance. Neither one spoke right away, not knowing what to say. Just as Jaime was about to start, Steve jumped in. "Nice necklace."

Jaime blushed little bit, fingering the pendant lightly. "Yes, it is. He should never have…."

"Hey sweetheart, I was just ribbing you a little bit. I just didn't know you and Oscar were an item." He had to admit he was jealous. He knew that Jaime didn't remember their lives together before the accident, but they had been pretty close after the accident, and Steve had hoped that maybe her love for him would be rekindled on its own. But looking in her eyes, holding her now, he knew that it just hadn't happened. He knew that look – it just wasn't for him.

Jaime pulled back from his arms. "We're NOT an item - honestly." She could see that Steve was looking right through her – that he knew how she felt. He didn't deserve to be toyed with. She respected him too much for that. "I mean, I don't think he feels that way about me. I wish he did." She could see the look of sorrow and dejection in Steve's eyes upon hearing her words. "I'm sorry Steve. I know you still care about me, and I love you as a friend, but my feelings just aren't what you want them to be."

He swept her back into his arms. "I know, and there's no need to apologize. It's not your fault – it's no one's fault. I just want you to know that I'm always here for you. I'm sorry about Oscar – really. I know what it's like to love someone who's not in love with you." His eyes bore through her like a laser, and Jaime winced almost as if a real laser beam had cut right through her.

"So this is how you've been feeling all this time?"

"Pretty much. But hey, let's talk about something else. Mom and dad will be here tomorrow – you think I ought to bring them over to Oscar's?"

"Sure, I really think they'll have a great time."

The party began to wind down, and everyone said their goodbyes. Oscar had hoped to squeeze in one more dance with Jaime, but duty called and he had to make the rounds, visiting with all of his agents and their spouses or dates. He looked wistfully at Jaime and whispered, "see you tomorrow babe," as she was walking out with Steve. She smiled at him and nodded, discreetly blowing him a kiss as she left. Oscar felt a little envious of Steve – he was so free and easy with Jaime.