(A/N) Okay so it's been two days since I got my internet privaleges back, so why haven't I posted anything? Well, I also got my video game privaleges back as well and started a new file on Final Fantasy X. I got a fourth of the way into the game in one day, yet it's taken me months to ATTEMPT to complete the last two battles of the game. Sad, I know. Anyway, it's about TIME I updated this, it's my most wanted fic.

Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist, and if I ever do come to own it you'll know because there WILL be an OAV with Ed in a miniskirt. There just will.

Other Disclaimer: Not all girls are like what Winry is making Edwina and Royette be, I mean OBVIOUSLY. If all girls WERE like that, I wouldn't be writing this, I'd be getting 'beauty sleep' or some other bull shit like that.

Without thinking, I quickly smashed the wig onto Roy's head and put him into a headlock in what seemed like a second. "GAH!" he struggled as I pulled him down to my level, tightening my grip on him. "What," I hissed in his ear, dragging him out of sight of the confused salon goers, "do you think you're doing?"

He managed to release himself from my grasp, and fell to the ground gasping for breath. "I..." Riza was still a little flushed from the whole thing, "I can explain." She walked over toward me, Winry, and the suffocating shemale, "I told... Roy..." she paused, "that I knew it was him. And well... she looked away a little, he said 'Good, now I can do this.'"

"Idiot." Winry and I said in unison. "Shut..." Roy stood up, straightening out his skirt, "up."

"Oh Royette!" Winry whined, fixing his wig, and fussing over the socks that were hanging out of his shirt.

I looked at the strange sight before me, and then turned back to Riza, "Wait... why didn't you push him away?" I asked curiously.

"Well..." Riza stared at the mess named Roy as she spoke, "he asked me to be his girlfriend the other day... and... well I guess that was my way of saying yes."

"Really?" Roy bouced a bit causing his boobs to move up and down in a way that can only be described as utterly disturbing. "Yes!" he exclaimed, his voice hardly fitting his appearance.

"You're a girl, remember?" Winry elbowed him in the ribs. I snickered, though not very loud considering I still had two more hours of torture.

Roy reached into his bra and started digging around, which cause us, and several onlookers, to stare in amazement. He pulled something out and threw it at me. A ten dollar bill? "Huh?" I said confused.

"I lose the bet," he said putting his arm around Riza, "let's go get me some pants..." She laughed, walking away with him, "That would be nice..."

Winry and I watched as the couple awkwardly made their way into a department store and disappeared. "Uh.." was all I had to say about it.

"Wow..." Winry added. We continued staring where our friends had once stood.

"Look," I broke the silence, "I kind of get what you're trying to teach me..." I turned and started walking, she did the same and fell into step with me. "What?" she asked, no idea what I was talking about.

"You know, the whole guy hitting on you thing. It IS a pain. I guess I can understand why you'd get upset over it.. seeing how you liked him.." I slowed down and looked at her, "Sorry I was kind of mean about that."

She stopped and smiled at me, "It's okay," she started walking again, "I didn't like him that much anyway. There's someone else..." her voice trailed off. "Oh!" she exclaimed, changing the subject, "Let's go into this store! I'm sure these dresses will look SO cute on you!" she started dragging me into what I would call a deathly black hole, that is, if it wasn't mostly pink.

"You're kidding right?" I said as we stood in the entrance, as she looked around for something. "Of course not," she pulled me towards a rack with masses of skirts hanging on it. "Hmmm..." she looked through them, grabbing a dozen or so. "You're going to try all of those on?" I asked astounded.

She grinned, "No," she spoke sweetly, "you are." She shoved me into a dressing room, along with the pile of skirts.

"Okay," I could hear her from the other side of the door, "now try each and every one on. I was sure to get your size so I know they all fit. Be sure to come out and model them for me, it's fashion show time!" she squealed, irritating me.

"Oh and what if I don't?" I asked getting ready to undo the lock on the door. "Oh I don't know..." she said mischeiviously, "maybe send all these pictures I have of you in a skirt on my camera phone to... hm... everybody?" I stopped dead in my tracks. She had me, and she knew it. "Fine," I mumbled, sliding on the first frilly article of clothing.

"Hey," I asked as I straightened out the skirt, "who was the other guy you were talking about before?" I asked curiously. "Why?" she asked sounding smug, "You jealous?" I rolled my eyes, "Hardly. I was just going to say, if it's Roy, I'll need a wrench because you have a few screws loose."

That wasn't my actual reason for asking, obviously, I just really wanted to know. I wasn't sure WHY I was so eagar to know. I just was. Maybe it was the high heeled boots talking. "Don't worry," she said laughing, "it's definitely not Roy." "Oh.." I was relieved to hear this. I stood staring at the dressing room mirror. I was NOT going out.

Winry, however, had other plans. "Oh hey look, there he is!" she shouted. "Where?" I opened the door to look. Suddenly I saw a flash, too late to realize she was taking a picture of me. "Hey!!" I hid my body behind the door and glared at her.

"Wait a minute.." I said accusingly, "you don't even have a camera phone... that's MINE." "I know," she said darkly, "isn't the idea of sending it to everyone in your adress book so much more fun?"

(A/N) Not too long, but hey, I updated. Lot of stuff happened huh? I know, I'm surprised too! (Why am I surprised, I'm the author?!?) Anyway, I'll update soon, seeing how I THINK I might know how the next chapter will go... not one hundred percent sure though. Be sure to review!!