Poor Lonely Girl

One Shot

Okay, this is mostly Andie talking to her mother. I just felt like I should write it for everyone who lost their mom or any other family members or friends. I often have nightmares of losing my mom and I always wake up crying. I know it must be hard, so I thought they should have something special dedicated to them.

A/N: This has nothing to do with A Little of Everything. Just wanted to make that clear. And it's set so that Andie's mom had died recently while she was as MSA just because I thought that it would be better.

Andie walked through the hallways of MSA. The stares she received made everything harder than it had to be. She tried to smile, but it only made it easier to cry, so she kept her eyes on the ground. People walked up to her and asked her if she was okay. What was she supposed to say? Yes? No, she wasn't okay. She had lost the one person who was always there. Before Chase, before Moose, before Missy. She always had her mom. Well, not anymore.

"Hey." A girl Andie didn't know said, walking up to her, smiling sympathetically. "Are you alright?" There goes that question again. If she said no, she would just hear how everything was going to be alright. If she said yes, she would be a liar.
"I'm fine. Thanks." Andie returned her eyes to the ground. She decided she would rather be a liar. She couldn't stand to hear one more person tell her everything was going to be okay. It wasn't. She knew it wasn't. Not without her mom.

Andie put her books in her locker. What made her think she could come back to school? Her mother had died only two weeks ago. There was no way she was over it by now. And no one was making it easier by giving her sad smiles.

She sat at her locker, hoping to see Chase. Sure enough, he came up to her and hugged her. She didn't him to hug her. She knew if she did, she wouldn't be able to control her tears. She cried into his shirt and he didn't let her go.

"Hey," he began. "It's gonna be okay."

No. Not Chase. He was a liar! They were all liars.

"No, it's not!" Andie screamed pulling away from him. She didn't care if her tears were visible, she couldn't listen to this. Not again.

"She's gone and never coming back! You don't know what it feels like!"

Chase didn't say anything. He watched her as her tears came pouring down her cheeks and people began to stare at her and whisper. He could feel his eyes filling, too. Seeing Andie so upset broke his heart.

Andie stormed away as Moose came around the corner. "What happened?" He asked, sitting next to Chase.

"She doesn't deserve this." He said, leaning his head back. "No one does."

As Andie slept that night, she had dreams about her mother. She was so beautiful. She looked like Andie, but with longer hair and prettier eyes.

"Andie, sweetie! Blow out the candles!"

It was Andie's seventh birthday.

Andie made a wish and blew out all seven of the candles with one breath.

"Yay!" Everyone cheered.

Andie smiled in her sleep, but tears were still coming down her eyes. Somehow, she knew that when she woke up, her mother wouldn't be there.

Andie's mind drifted to another memory. This time, she was in her bed, lying next to her mother.

"Mommy, when I grow up, I want to be a dancer like at the streets!"

"Okay, sweetie. You can."

"What did you want to be when you were little, mommy?"

"Well, I wanted to be a doctor. But, my dad wanted me to run his business."

"Why didn't you?"

"Well, sweetie, it wasn't my dream. My dream was to help people. But, that couldn't happen for me. I didn't have enough money."

"How come you didn't have enough moneys,mommy?

Andie's mother laughed at her daughter's use of the word 'moneys'.

"Well, sweetie, it was just hard. But, I don't ever want anything to stop you from your dream. I want you to be whatever you want to be and never give up."

"Okay, mommy."

"And, remember, Andie. Just be you. 'Cause life's too short to be anyone else."

Andie mouthed along with the words in her dream as tears flowed from her eyes and spilled onto her bed. Just be you... just be you...

Andie went to school the next day, but this time, she didn't even look up when people came to her. She just walked around them and kept her eyes on the ground. Wasn't this supposed to get easier with time? She didn't look for Chase this time. She didn't want him around. He was a liar. Everyone was lying to her. Why couldn't they just tell the truth? Your mom is dead, and she's not coming back. It's not just going to be okay.

As all her classes went by, Andie thought about just one thing. I don't want to be here. I want to be at home. With my mom.

Andie began to cry and ran out of her English class.

"Ms. West, come back here!" Her teacher called after her.

She ran out of the building. She ran as fast as she could. She could feel herself becoming extremely tired and her legs getting weak. That didn't stop her. Nothing was enough to stop her. When she finally reached where she wanted to be, she dropped to her knees. She sat in front of her mother's tombstone. "Here lies Cameron West. Mother to everyone."

Andie reread the tombstone. She wasn't a mother to everyone. She was a mother to me.

"Mom." Andie's voice was soft and shaky from tears. "Mom, I need you. I cant go to school anymore. I cant go anywhere. I cant do anything. When you're not here. I miss you, mom. I need you."

Andie buried her face in her hands until they were soaking wet. She lifted her head. And gave a big sniff.

"I know you used to tell me to just be me, but you were a huge part of me. How can I be me without you?"

The tears came back, but Andie didn't try to stop them. She couldn't say anything else. When she thought she was going to lose her mind, someone came and sat beside her.

"I know it's not easy."

"You don't know anything, Chase."

"I know you miss her."

Chase moved close to Andie and hugged her. She was to weak and sad to fight him.

"She's not gone, Andie."

Andie lay her head on his shoulder and let her tears soak his shirt.

"She's never gone."

A few months later, Andie was able to concentrate on school again. It wasn't easy, but she could almost sit through a whole period without crying.

As Andie left her last period classroom, she saw Chase waiting for her at the door.
"You ready to go to practice?"

"Uh, yeah. Just give me a half hour, I'll be there."

Chase nodded and watched her as she walked out the huge double doors of MSA. She walked this time. She was slow. No weak legs. She wasn't out of breath. She just walked. When she finally reached where she was going, she fell to her knees, just as she had done last time.

"Hey, mommy... I had a good day at school today. Moose was making so many jokes, I almost died laughing. Oh, yeah. Moose is my best friend. He's really great, mom. He's so funny. And Missy. You know her. She's such a great dancer. She helped my get back on my feet when I couldn't dance because I was so sad. And Chase. He's so wonderful, mommy. He helped me. He helped me move on. He helped me stop the tears."

Andie's eyes began filling again, just as they had done last time. But, she was able to blink them back. She was able to stop them from flowing down her cheeks and onto the ground.

"Mom, things were so hard when you died. Sarah was having trouble taking care of Charlie. Tyler couldn't help, he was on tour. But he called me every night. Mom, it was so hard. But, now I know. You're not gone. You'll never be gone..."

Andie looked down at her watch. It was time for her to go practice with her crew.

"I have to go, mommy. I love you." Andie stood up from her spot. As she was on her way back to MSA, she could have sworn she heard the air whisper Just be you...

Sorry if this sucked, but I thought the people out there who had lost their moms deserved something special. I hope this was it. I know I could never understand what you're feeling and I'm not going to pretend I do, but you should know that she's never gone...

A/N: Sorry for my ignorance, I've never seen the first Step Up, so I don't really know anything about Andie's mom. I just made up the name.