CHAPTER 4- RELAXATION... SORT OF
"O-akay so we've-a got to go to-a Bowser's Castle, right?" said Mario.
Right when Link was about to respond, Mario tripped over something.
"Hey-a it's-a map!" said Mario, getting back up from his fall.
"Let's see what it says." said Link.
Describing the map in words: There was an X done in red paint, and next to it said "U r here" in very sloppy handwriting. There was a curly twisted dotted line going straight towards a smiley face. Next to the smiley face said "Bowser Spa, the place to relax on your long perilous journeys!"
"Bowser-a spa? Sounds-a suspicious!" said Mario.
"Oh your just being paranoid, look it says 'The best place to relax' the fat dude with the shell isn't the only person with the name Bowser." said Link.
"Who-a else would-a name their kid-a Bowser?" said Mario.
"Okay, that was a cheap shot, but who cares let's go." said Link.
They started wandering in all these loops and curves and finally came to a place.
"What-a is this? Looks-a more like a castle-a!" said Mario.
"No no, it's just a fancy setup, to attract more customers." said Link.
"Let's just hope-a there's no pink-a poodle hair stylists..." said Mario, lifting up his hat to reveal blue hair, and rubbing the area where eyebrows should be.
"Hehe," said Link.
They walked up to the door of the 'spa' and found a sign on the front door.
"Says... 'Com Chek out Bowser's spa, next 2 cuztomerz getz inn 4 free!'" Said Link.
"Yeah-a can't be Bowser-a, he's written me-a ransome notes-a before, not his handwriting-a" said Mario.
"Told you sooo!" said Link, sounding pretty childish.
They went up to the door and opened it. There was a person standing behind a counter that looked like bowser, only with a bad 80's hair, that litterally looked like strawberry icecream stacked up about 4 feet high.
"How may I help you?" said the person behind the counter... with a very deep voice for a girl.
"We just-" Mario was cut short.
"The pedicure/manicure combo package please!" said Link.
"Alrighty then! Muhuhahahaha!" said the person.
"What?" said Mario.
"Umm... I had a cough... follow me into the back room." said this odd person.
They went into the back room and the lights flicked on. There was a kiddie pool filled with something that had a little paper sign taped to it that said 'Mud Bath.' And there was a torn up chair that had some saws sitting next to it that said 'Pedicure/Manicure.'
"Looks good to me!" said Link. As he said this the dim light started to flicker a bit.
"What-a is going-a on?" said Mario.
"It's just some faulty wiring is all..." said the weird person, who is really good at coming up with excuses.
"Not-a just that-a... there is saws-a for the-a pedicure/a-manicure..." said Mario, about to leave.
"No, no, no those are just some high tech nail massager things!" said the person quickly.
"Works-a for me." said Mario.
"I call mud bath first! Said Link, pulling off his shirt, revealing a bikini and a hairy chest.
"That's just-a nasty..." said Mario to himself, trying to look away from links hairy chest.
Link was just about to step in the mud bath and Mario was about to get his jagged toenails 'trimmed.' Just then, Link pulled his foot away and said, "Before I get in I always need to rub lotion on my skin." He pulled out some lotion and started to rub it on himself.
"Oh lord that's foul!" shouted Mario, running off to barf in something.
Just as he was rubbing this lotion on himself, some fell into the mud bath. KABOOM! The mud shot everywhere.
"What's going on here?" shouted Link, "Is this explosive mud??"
"No, no, no, there is no such thing!" said the person, getting nervous.
"Yeah there is! I saw it on the Spy Channel once... I'm out of here! C'mon Mario lets go!" said Link.
Mario just got out of the bathroom with something green around his mouth.
"Coming," said Mario, feeling better that Link had put his clothes back on.
They were walking toward the door, when suddenly the person said, "Now Ganondorf!"
Quickly Link and Mario turned around. Ganondorf and Bowser were coming towards them. They noticed the pink wig on the ground and realized that Bowser was the weird person.
They turned back around and started running.
"Come back here you medling kids!" said Bowser.
"Why did we start running?" said Link in between breaths.
"Eh, it-a makes everything-a more dramatic-a, and it-a adds more words to-a the chapter-a. In the next-a chapter we'll probably like turn around-a and fight. It all depends-a on what the idiot-a, who decided to-a write this dumb-a story, chooses-a." said Mario, while I was running.
Bowser and Ganondorf were close behind and were getting closer.