There were just too many things going on at once. Edward was steadily shredding the bed into a million pieces, my heart was pounding its way out of my chest, my arms hurt terribly, and I could barely breath. A million thoughts were going through my head as I continued to press against Edwards chest. As odd as it was, I was worried about him almost more than myself. I knew he couldn't control this and I knew once it was over, he wouldn't be able to get through it. How could I even think about that? I was the one possibly about to raped! Here I was fretting over his conscious. What was going on here? Geese.
His hand easily snapped my thin thong and flung it across the room. Fear filled me then and I knew I had to do something or this was going to end very badly. I slipped my arms around his neck and pulled my face up to his ear. "Edward," I whispered as seductively as I could manage. Hopefully he couldn't hear the utter fear in my voice. His whole body froze. I grabbed my moment and moved out from under him. I lay him down on the bed and threw myself on top of him. He wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me towards him. With his other hand I felt his pants get pulled away. That would have been exciting if I knew for sure I had this under control. When his arm released me I looked down into his golden eyes. There was lust. That was it.
He was looking at me but there was no doubt in my mind that he didn't even see me. His eyes were totally focused on something beyond me. Everything was eerily quiet. The only sound was our ragged breathing. His hands were gripped on my hips, it hurt but I didn't dare move. Was this my chance to bring him out of it? I took a deep breath and slowly touched his face. The second my hands touched his stone skin, something sparked in his eyes. He grabbed my arms and rolled us off the bed. Again he was on top. This was it, I couldn't do anything. My instincts kicked in and I started screaming as loud as I could. This did nothing except excite him more. He held my flailing arms to the ground. "Edward please!" I screamed but he didn't even act like he heard me. I pulled my legs in between his to try and drag things out. A growl moved through his chest. I continued to scream but no one was going to hear me.
Edward easily pushed my legs aside and I prepared myself for the absolute worst. This was what I had wanted right? I had tried so many times to get him to do this. Of course I wanted this but not this way. If only he could read my mind like everyone else. Maybe that would stop him. I paused my screaming and looked up at him. He was staring at me like he didn't know who I was. His eyes shot to my neck. I knew he was eyeing my pulsing skin there. Eager eyes moved over my exposed body. He took a deep breath and I knew what was coming next. I held in a deep breath and waited.
Bright bursts of pain blossomed behind my eyes. If I wasn't crying before, I certainly was now. It felt like everything below was waist was on fire. It just kept coming. It would ease for half a second then start again. I was no longer screaming but I knew mumbling between sobs. This was nothing like I had thought it would be. How could everything have gone so wrong. I could just barely hear Edwards moans over the pounding in my ears. My arms no longer fought, they simply fell to the side. The pain continued to burn my insides for a few minutes more before he pulled away. I stayed where I was on the floor. There was no part of me that wanted to move. I didn't want to make the pain worse.
I don't know what happened to Edward, it took only seconds for unconsciousness to find me. My dreams were filled with a single horribly face staring down at me. It seemed to be chasing me but I couldn't get any farther away from it. It just kept coming and my screams couldn't keep it away. Every now and then I could hear strange noises. They sounded like whimpers. I felt like I should find whoever was doing it and help them. Comfort them.
Things started to get brighter and brighter through my eyelids. For some reason my whole body was aching. Why couldn't I remember? What did I do? Slowly I opened my eyes and took in the room. I was still in the small house, in the bedroom. When I tried to sit up pain shot through my arms and legs. Suddenly everything came flying back to me. Dinner, Edwards near attack, my pleading, and finally… Tears sprang up out of my eyes and fell silently. I pulled my knees up to my chest and held them. For a few minutes I just let myself cry. I let the pain pore out. I glanced around the room, trying to figure out what was going on now. My tattered dress was still laying on the bed, the thong was on the floor against the wall. All Edwards clothes were laying in a pile near the door. Edward! Where was he?
I reached behind me and pulled the sheet off the bed. After making sure it was wrapped completely around me, I made my way out of the room. The whole house was silent. He wasn't in the living room. The fire was lit though, making everything warm. I wondered over to the front door, trying to ignore the pain in my lower body. Through the window I could see Edward sitting out front. He wore only a pair of kaki pants and nothing else. I slipped through the door and sat next to him. He didn't look at me. His body was tense. I briefly wondered if he had been like this before I came out. Probably not.
We sat in silence for a long time. Neither one of us even moved. Something felt odd in my stomach. First it almost felt like I was hungry, then it changed to cramps. My arms automatically went to wrap themselves around my torso. Edward glanced over at me and winced. Could I really look that bad? "Bella, lets go inside and… find some clothes for you." I knew why he hesitated there. I needed new clothes because of him. That hadn't been a bad thing at the time, not that it hadn't turned that way. He stood up and held his hand out for mine. Once he had my hand he let me into the house. It seemed like he was trying not to touch me that much. "Edward are you okay?" He stopped dead in his tracks. "Am I okay? Am I okay? Bella how can you even ask that? You should be worried about yourself. I could have killed you last night! I honestly cant believe I didn't!" His voice echoed through the house. I was lost for what to say to him. "Bella how bad did I hurt you?" His eyes moved along my arms and he shuttered. Not understand, I looked down as well. On the upper part of both my arms were large hand shaped bruises. There were also smaller bruises on both my wrists.
"Edward I don't know what to say, I mean I…" The rest of my words never made it from my mouth as pain shot up from my pelvis. I started to fall when I felt his hands grab my sides. "Damn," he muttered. His arm pulled my legs out from under me as he lifted me up. Before I knew it we were back in his bedroom and I was on the bed. A small scream escaped my lips as he placed his hand on my stomach. "What's wrong Bella? What did I do to you?" His hand left mine for only a second before he was back with a cell phone. "I'm going to call Carlisle." My eyes widened. "No Edward please, it will go away, just wait, please!" He stared at me for a moment then put the phone in his pocket. "What do you want me to do love?" The pain was going away so I just sat silent for a minute and let it pass. Just as I was about to answer his question he gasped. "What? What is it?" I asked as I leaned up onto my elbows. He pulled back my sheet and I gasped with him. There was blood all over the sheet and bed below me. I quickly looked at Edward but he wasn't breathing. His eyes met mine. I stood up and ran for the bathroom, sheet and all. He didn't bother following.
Once inside I threw to now red sheet onto the floor and jumped into the shower. The hot water felt great on my many bruises. The water ran red into the drain. After about 20 minutes it cleared out and I stepped out of the shower. On the toilet was a pile of clothes and a box of pads. Pore Edward, that must have been embarrassing. Before I got dressed I examined myself in the full length mirror. The insides of my legs were covered in dark blue spots. Anyone who looked would know for sure what had happened. I had been raped by the love of my life. He had hurt me worse than James ever could have thought about doing. I couldn't hold back the tears that started to pore down my face.